"Roman Harris-Warrick?"
Danny sounded surprised and I guess he had a
right to be. I hadn’t shown any interest in Roman
before so it was bound to raise a few eyebrows when
I suddenly started asking for his number.
"No, the other Roman," I said just because I was
ornery. Troy had just walked out ten minutes ago and
even though I refused to accept it, I was upset.
"What other Roman?" Danny asked.
"There is no other Roman, tard. Just gimme his
number." I was starting to get impatient and I
wasn’t in the mood to play games with Danny.
"What do you want it for?" he asked suspiciously.
"None of your fucking business. Now just hurry up
and give me his goddamn number."
Silence. Danny was stunned and so was I. I had
never spoken to one of my friends like that before.
"Dude," Danny said cautiously, "are you okay?"
I felt like an ogre for snapping at him. He had
no idea what had just happened, how shattered I was
feeling. It wasn’t fair for me to take out my
frustration at Troy on Danny.
"I’m sorry," I said. "Can you just give me
Roman’s number? Please?"
Danny hesitated for just a minute before saying,
"Sure, lemme find it for you."
He put down the receiver and I heard paper
rustling, then he picked it back up again and said,
"Here it is."
He gave me the number and I wrote it down. When I
was done, I said thanks and hung up before Danny had
a chance to start asking questions about why I was
so surly.
I went up the stairs and headed straight for my
bedroom. I entered my room and went to the bath,
dropping Roman’s number on the dresser on the way.
Then I went to go get cleaned up. What I saw in the
bathroom mirror shocked me and stopped me in my
tracks.
For starters, I had rapidly drying semen smeared
all over my chest. Also, the right side of my neck
was red. Very, very red. It must have been from Troy
was squeezing the shit out of me as he came. Erotic
asphyxsiation.I knew that by the time the party came
around I would have a big bruise there.
For some reason that made me angry, knowing that
he had left a mark that others would be able to see.
He’d successfully branded me his fucktoy and it was
partly my fault. I let out a frustrated sigh.
Hurriedly, I stripped out of my pants and jumped
into the shower. I felt the need to get clean. To
wash myself until all trace of Troy was gone.
The water hit me hard, but I liked the jolt. I
didn’t adjust the temperature; I just let the water
heat until it was burning. I didn’t care. The hotter
the better. I wanted it to hurt, so maybe next time
when I was tempted to do something stupid I would
remember. Again, I felt the need to cry, but I
didn’t give in. Crying was for bitches, and I wasn’t
a bitch.
I rushed through the shower, knowing that I
didn’t have a lot of time till the party. I still
hadn’t done anything to prepare and I had a laundry
list of things to do. I wasn’t stressed, though,
cause it wasn’t really a party, just more of a get
together. Plus, there wasn’t a lot to be done
anyway. I had decided that I would do things
barbecue style so everything would be outside. It
would make the clean up easier because people
wouldn’t be able to mess up the house.
I hopped out of the shower and didn’t even bother
with a towel. Instead I just walked back into my
room soaking wet and started going through my
underwear drawer. I still had to call Roman, but I
honestly didn’t know what I would say. I considered
just telling him that I knew he had a thing for me
and then inviting him over and offering to fuck him
tonight.
The more I thought about it, the better the idea
seemed. I wanted to get back at Troy and, presuming
that he gave a shit, this would be the best way to
do it. I was still horny because I hadn’t gotten off
while Troy was here and Roman was a good-looking
guy. He obviously liked me, so why not just take
advantage of what he was offering?
Because that wasn’t who I was, I thought. And
despite everything that was going on, I still liked
Troy. He was the one that I wanted, and trying to
substitute him with someone else would only end in
disaster. But, it didn’t look like Troy was going to
stop being a jerk any time soon. So, what the fuck
was I supposed to do? Wait around for him until he
got tired of being an asshole?
Screw that. I was seventeen years old, and
rapidly approaching my sexual prime. Troy wasn’t the
only piece of ass around. I was mentally psyching
myself up to call Roman, and it was working. I knew
that I wasn’t thinking sensibly. Just a moment ago I
had established that I wasn’t the kind of guy that
would use another person to get over someone. It
looked like I was going to prove myself wrong.
I picked out some underwear and put it on. I was
only a little moist now and the underwear clung my
skin. I walked over to where I had dropped Roman’s
number and picked it up. I then went over to the
side of my bed and sat down. I stared at the seven
digits on the piece of paper for a long while before
reaching for my phone. This is it, I thought and
began dialing Roman’s number.
******
So, I had called Roman’s number, but he hadn’t
answered and the call had gone to his voicemail,
leaving me no option but to leave a message. So, I
did. I told him about the party and invited him
over. Now all I had to do was wait and see if he
would show up.
At the beginning of the week I had been so
excited about this party, now I no longer cared
about its outcome. I was just mechanically going
through the motions of setting up. I brought out the
grill - my dad’s pride and joy - and set it up under
the awning. We already had tables and chairs in our
backyard, and a pool, so there really wasn’t much
for me to do except bring out the speakers and the
food.
The whole thing took me about fifteen minutes and
I was done. I went to the kitchen and started
looking for some fluorescent balloons I’d purchased
earlier in the week. I’d spotted them at Spencer’s
at the mall and thought that it would be cool to
scatter them around the pool as a form of
decoration. When buying them, I’d thought of how
awesome they would look and how much everyone would
like them.
The truth was, I no longer felt like it. I didn’t
feel like exerting the energy or putting in the
effort. Still, I didn’t want them to go to waste so
I opened the bag and started blowing them up. I
added a little water to each to help hold them down,
and then I took them over to the pool in groups of
ten.
It took me five trips because there were fifty
balloons. When I was all done, I went over to our
pool house and hit the switch for the under water
pool lights to come on. The effect was magnificent.
Because it was getting dark out and the balloons had
a glow-in-the-dark quality, it looked like the pool
was filled with thousands of stars. Having done
that, I returned to the house to get my cell phone,
which I had left in my room.
Every time I walked past the hallway, I was
reminded of what Troy and I had done there only
hours before. And even though I tried not to, I kept
remembering his words before we were interrupted by
my dad’s phone call. "The last time we were together
…" what? What had Troy been about to say? I was
driving myself crazy trying to come up with possible
ways to finish that sentence.
I was right about my neck. By the time it was
eight o’clock, Troy’s fingerprints had turned
purple. I thought about going upstairs and changing
into a turtleneck to hide the bruise, but that would
have been stupid. It was almost seventy degrees out,
not to mention that wearing a turtleneck to a
barbecue was just ... retarded.
I was just about to sit down and wait for people
to start arriving when my phone rang. I looked at
the caller I.D. - it was Danny.
"Hello?" I said.
"Hey dude, where are you?" Danny asked.
"I’m at home. Where are you?" I replied.
"I’m at your home too. I’m out front."
"Oh," I said, "well come on back to the pool."
"Okay," he said.
He made no mention of my earlier grouchiness and
I was glad. I knew I owed him an apology but I
didn’t really want to get into it. If things went
right, I was gonna have a good time with my friends
tonight, hopefully get high and maybe even get some
ass.
I stood up just as Danny stepped through the
glass doors that separated the kitchen from the
patio.
"Hi," he said as he came up to me.
"Hey," I said. I decided to get any awkwardness
out of the way right then.
"About earlier, I was …" I began.
"It’s cool, man," Danny said, brushing aside my
attempt at an apology.
"Okay," I said, nodding. I was glad for his easy
dismissal because I didn’t really want to talk about
it either. I decided to change the topic. "Did you
bring the stuff?"
"No, it was Scott’s turn to get the stuff," he
said.
"Where is Scott?" I asked.
"He went to pick up Troy before heading over,"
Danny said. He watched my face very closely for a
reaction when he said Troy’s name. I was proud of
myself because my expression didn’t change.
"Cool," was all I said.
"Why don’t we start the barbecue while we wait
for the others to get here?" Danny suggested.
"Yeah," I said, and we both headed towards the
kitchen to get the meat out of the freezer.
******
Half an hour later the party was in full swing.
There were people all over the place and everyone
kept talking about the balloons in the pool. I was
glad that I had decided to use them after all. I was
actually having a good time and I hadn’t thought
about Troy for about five minutes. I wasn’t a very
good cook, but I was doing a good job of not burning
the meat to a crisp, which seemed to be enough for
everyone.
I kept looking around to see if Scott had
arrived. I convinced myself it was because I wanted
to get the stuff and not because he was
bringing Troy. To my left I heard Donna, a
beautiful, chubby girl with honey blonde hair
laughing and it brought me out of my reverie. She
was laughing because of something Ian said, and then
I heard her mention that Scott had arrived. My head
snapped up.
I watched Scott come through the glass doors
leading from the kitchen to the backyard followed by
Troy. My breath caught in my throat when I saw him.
My first thought was ‘God, he looked good’, followed
by ‘God, how I wanted him’. I wanted him so much
that I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about
how much I wanted him. It tore me up that he thought
of me as a random person. I wanted to mean something
to him. even though I didn’t want to admit it, he
meant a lot to me.
I looked away before he caught me staring and
pretended to concentrate on the meat I was grilling.
I still hadn’t gotten a call back from Roman so I
had no idea whether he was planning to show or not.
I didn’t think he knew where I lived so I was
expecting him to call and ask for directions. The
night was still early so I wasn’t worried about it.
A few people had noticed the bruise on my neck
and had asked me about it. I wasn’t about to tell
them how Troy’s fingers had caused it while he had
been in the throes of his orgasm so I just said
nothing. Everyone accepted my silence except for
Danny, who was giving me a knowing smile. I couldn’t
imagine what he was thinking and I didn’t feel like
trying to figure it out.
Ever since seeing Troy my pulse had been going
crazy. I was so excited that he was here. Now all I
needed was for Roman to show up so that I could
throw him in Troy’s face. Perhaps if I hadn’t been
so hurt and confused I would have noticed how evil
my plans sounded. It was so not like me to plot this
way. I pretended not to notice that Troy had
arrived, but I watched him out of the corner of my
eye. That way I would know the exact moment when he
started to head towards me.
I wasn’t sure whether or not Troy had seen me
yet, but I didn’t want to look and check what he was
doing. I knew that he would eventually make his way
over to the grill cause that was where the food was.
He was a teenage boy and the only thing teenage boys
liked more than sex, was food. It wouldn’t be long
before he headed over here; all I had to do was
wait.
My prediction turned out to be right because not
more than ten minutes later Scott came up to me at
the grill closely followed by Troy.
"Hey dude," Scott said.
"Hey," I said. "Danny says you’ve got the stuff."
"Oh, yeah," Scott said, smiling.
"Hey," Troy said, cutting into the conversation.
He sounded so nonchalant that one would have never
known what the two of us had done together earlier.
"Hi," I said, barely sparing him a glance before
turning back to Scott. If Troy was going to act like
nothing had happened, then I could pretend too.
"When do you wanna light the shit up?" Scott
asked.
"As soon as I’m done with the grill," I replied.
"Cool," Scott replied, "lemme know when you’re
done." And with that he turned and headed off,
leaving Troy and I to face each other.
I finished flipping some burgers and put them on
a plate. Troy just watched me, quietly, in that way
that was uniquely his own. I had no idea what he was
thinking, but I knew that it probably had to do with
his visit earlier that afternoon. Just thinking
about what we had done on my hallway floor made me
flush. I hoped that he would think it was the heat
of the grill making my face red.
It was times like these that it was obvious Troy
wanted to say something. I could see that he had
something on his mind; it was only a matter of
what. One thing I was beginning to learn
about Troy was that he liked to take his time.
"Look -," he finally began, but just then we were
interrupted.
Someone said, "Liam?"
We both turned and around and saw none other than
Roman Harris-Warrick standing less than ten feet
away. When had he arrived at the party?
"Roman?" I asked stupidly. I had no idea how long
he had been at the party.
"Hi," he said, shyly stepping closer.
"How did you get here?" Another stupid question.
Roman just shrugged. I glanced at Troy and caught
the frustration on his face at having been
interrupted. It seemed like every time he got ready
to say something, we were interrupted. The look he
was giving Roman was one of intense irritation and I
felt a spark of excitement. This is exactly what I
wanted. Roman had been here less than ten seconds
and he was already helping me get back at Troy. Troy
looked like he wanted to ask Roman to leave.
"Listen, do you mind … ?" Troy began, but I
didn’t let him finish.
Before I had time to properly think about what I
was doing, I moved forward towards Roman and
embraced him, saying with forced enthusiasm, "I’m so
glad you could make it."
Roman seemed a little taken aback at the
unexpected show of affection and mostly remained
immobile, but I wasn’t really paying attention to
him. I stepped back in time to watch the shock on
Troy’s face fade away to reveal something else. It
was an emotion I couldn’t name, but it seemed an
awful lot like pain. I knew that I must have been
imagining things because it couldn’t be. Troy’s gaze
flicked back and forth between Roman and I as if
seeing us for the first time.
"Uh … thanks for inviting me," Roman stuttered.
I smiled at him, but what I really wanted to do
was smirk at Troy and say, "see, you’re not the only
guy in the world". But, that would have been way too
childish, so I refrained and said instead, "Of
course. I really wanted you to be here."
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Troy flinch and
had to fight to keep from smiling. It felt good to
know I was getting to him. I had no idea when I had
become so sadistic, but I was on a roll and I wasn’t
ready to stop yet. I took hold of Roman’s hand and
turned to Troy, saying, "Would you mind excusing
us?"
I asked the question in a sickly sweet voice, all
the while knowing that it would only annoy him more.
I watched in disbelief as a tick formed in Troy’s
jaw. I could tell that he did mind, but I
watched to see what he would do. For a split second
he looked like he was about to say no, but instead
he turned and walked away without a word. I kept my
eye on him until he disappeared into a small group
of people on the other side of the pool, then I
permitted myself a small smile.
I turned back to Roman, who looked a little
confused at what was going on and suddenly I felt
bad for my unwitting pawn. Roman seemed like a
really nice kid, and despite all my attempts at
rationalizing my behavior, I still felt a twinge of
guilt for what I was doing. I came close to calling
a halt to the farce but I remembered all the times
Troy had walked past me in the last year like he
didn’t know who I was. I recalled all the times he
had pointedly ignored me and looked through me for
an entire year, and my resolve hardened.
The first part of my plan had gone well; I had
succeeded in getting under Troy’s skin just a
little. It was now time for me to really put my plan
into action. I led Roman towards one of the tables
that I had used as a makeshift bar. He looked a
little uncertain, but I guess that was to be
expected since this wasn’t his usual crowd. I didn’t
think he knew anyone else at the party besides Danny
and I, but he kept glancing around as though he was
looking for someone.
"Do you want something to drink?" I asked.
"Uh … sure," he said slowly.
I smiled reassuringly at him in an attempt to
make him feel more comfortable. I wanted him to
relax and have a good time. He returned my smile
shyly and I noticed that he had a really nice smile.
In fact, Roman was a pretty good-looking guy. He had
a kind of geek chic that made him adorable yet hot
at the same time. I wondered why I had never noticed
this before. I knew the answer - it was because I
had never had eyes for anyone other than Troy.
"Let’s go sit down somewhere," I suggested.
"Uh … sure," Roman said again.
I cast a surreptitious look around to see if Troy
was still watching. When I was sure that he was, I
faced my guest. I smiled at Roman again and led him
over to some vacant chairs underneath the awning.
Once I had him seated, I went to go find us some
drinks. When I returned with our beverages, I handed
one red plastic cup to Roman and then took a seat
next to him.
"Thank you," Roman mumbled before taking a huge
gulp of his drink.
I watched his Adam’s apple bob while I sipped my
own drink. All around us, people were eating,
laughing and drinking. I knew it wouldn’t be long
before they would start taking off their clothes to
get in the pool. The water was just too enticing,
and since it was heated, the guys loved to swim at
night at my house. But I knew that wouldn’t be until
later, and right now I wanted to get to the business
of Roman Harris-Warrick, and more specifically, the
feelings I knew he had for me.
"So … how are you enjoying the party?" I asked,
although I could clearly tell that he was nervous. I
just needed something to segue into conversation.
"It’s … uh … nice," he responded.
"I’m really am glad you came," I said again,
looking into his eyes, which I now noticed were an
amazingly clear cornflower blue.
Roman just ducked his head a little and blushed.
He was so shy! No wonder he had never come up
to me in all this time. It was lucky for him that I
had decided to do his work for him and take the
initiative in bringing us together. But now that I
had done that, I didn’t know what to do next. So, I
stalled.
"How’s school going?" I asked for lack of
anything better.
I watched Roman’s brows sink down in a frown
before he replied, "Fine."
I didn’t blame him for being confused. It was a
weird question for me to be asking. Maybe small talk
wasn’t such a good idea. I should probably just cut
to the chase while I was still ahead. I decided to
throw caution to the wind and confront him.
"Listen," I said, leaning forward, "I know you
like me."
"What?!" Roman said, before he started
sputtering.
He quickly sucked in his breath and then took a
hasty gulp of his drink. I waited for him to recover
from his shock. I didn’t want him to feel
embarrassed because I had discovered his feelings
for me. I expected him to come up with denials, but
once he lowered his cup he just looked at me like I
had sprouted horns on my head. That’s when I
realized that this wasn’t a normal reaction for
someone who’d had their secret crush not only
discovered, but revealed. Instead of being
embarrassed, Roman was looking at me like I was
crazy, which could only mean one thing … I’d made a
huge mistake.
Still gasping, Roman asked, "Why would you think
that?"
He sounded as if I had just suggested that we eat
live snails, and that irked me. It wasn’t that
implausible. Why did he have to make it sound like
such a ridiculous assumption? There was nothing
wrong with me. Why shouldn’t he like me? I was a
nice guy. I could feel myself becoming unreasonably
mad. If Roman didn’t like me then why was he always
hanging around me?
"I really like you as a friend but not in the way
that you think. I … I like someone else," Roman said
tentatively.
"Who?" I asked in a challenging manner, certain
that he wouldn’t be able to come up with anyone
else.
"Uh … Troy," he answered, and then, "Troy
Harrington." I guess he wanted to clarify, in case I
thought it was another Troy.
"What?!" Now it was my turn to stammer. I
couldn’t believe this shit. Roman liked Troy? My
Troy?
SHIT, my mind screamed. Roman had just admitted
to liking Troy. Did everyone like Troy? I
happened to look to my left and I spotted Troy
standing rather inconspicuously in the shadows. He
was looking directly at Roman and I, his gaze
unwavering. I had the overwhelming need to get away,
to be by myself.
"I … I’m sorry," I said, turning back to Roman,
"I have to go." I began retreating to the house,
leaving Roman to stare after me.
******
Upstairs in my room I was thinking about Roman
and Troy. I still couldn’t believe it. Roman liked
Troy? What were the odds that my backup guy
would have a thing for the same guy I had a thing
for? The worst part of it was that I could remember
being Roman a mere year ago; young and
seriously crushing on Troy with misguided ideas of
coupledom.
With that came a number of unpleasant scenarios.
I could just imagine Troy taking advantage of
Roman’s naiveté just as he had taken advantage of
mine. I couldn’t imagine Troy turning down a
freebie. And that’s what Roman was: a freebie.
Besides, Troy’s claim to fame was all in his pants.
he was known for his sexual prowess and promiscuous
ways.
I couldn’t be grateful enough that we had been
interrupted that afternoon. It was pretty safe to
say that Troy had been using me again.
I was brought out of my thoughts by a knocking
outside my door.
"Liam? Are you in there?" It was Danny.
I kept quiet just hoping he would go away. I knew
he would have questions and I wasn’t up to answering
them. He would want to know why I had disappeared
from my own party, and then he would insist that I
return downstairs. I just wasn’t up to it. But if I
didn’t respond, Danny would just keep pestering me
until I did.
"Go away!" I called.
"Come on, dude. Let me in," Danny said.
"Just leave me alone," I refused.
"Dude, you’re being a douche right now," Danny
responded.
"Please. I just wanna be by myself right now," I
said. I waited to see if Danny would leave.
"Okay," he finally said, "I’ll be back later."
******
Danny emerged from the house and made his way,
single-mindedly, to where Roman was still seated
under the awning.
Roman took one look at Danny’s angry expression
and his heart sank. When he had seen Danny run after
Liam, he had assumed the worst. He had always
suspected, despite Danny’s denials, that Danny liked
Liam. They were more than just best friends. Danny
had sworn there was nothing going on between them
and Roman had foolishly believed him. Now there was
no denying the reality of the situation. When faced
with a choice, Danny had chosen Liam. It was Liam he
had run after, Liam he was worried about.
Roman watched Danny approach and fought to remain
calm.
Danny wasted no time with niceties and
immediately confronted Roman, saying, "What did you
say to him?"
"Nothing … I …" Roman stammered.
"It’s not nothing," Danny insisted, his
face a mask of anger. "He’s in his room and he’s
really upset. Now what did you say?"
Instead of answering, Roman turned and hurried
off leaving Danny to stare after him for a few
seconds before following. Roman wasn’t sure where he
was going, but he couldn’t face Danny’s anger any
longer. Too bad Danny wasn’t content to let him walk
away.
Just as Danny almost reached Roman’s side, Troy
intercepted Danny to find out how Liam was doing.
Danny didn’t have time to discuss it, so he muttered
something and hurried after Roman, leaving Troy to
stare after him in frustration. He caught up to
Roman just as he was about to reach the pool house.
Grabbing onto Roman’s arm, Danny pulled him to a
stop.
Roman whirled around and said, "I …"
The rest of what he was going to say was cut off
when Danny’s lips landed squarely on his own,
effectively silencing him.
******
Twenty minutes later I was still lying on my bed
like a big loser and missing my own party. I felt
like such a fool. Troy wasn’t interested in me and I
had been totally wrong about Roman.
Luckily, before I was able to sink any deeper
into depression, there was another knock at my door.
"William?" It was Scott.
I thought about just remaining silent, but then I
remember that he had the stuff. I slowly rose off my
bed and went to open the door. Scott took one look
at my miserable face, then pulled out a Ziploc bag
with an unidentifiable white powder inside of it.
"What the fuck is that?" I asked, warily eyeing
both Scott and the bag like it was toxic.
"Relax," Scott chuckled, "it’s not what you’re
thinking - it’s just Ritalin. Crushed."
That was the thing about Scott; sometimes it was
like he was on a one-way trip to becoming a junkie.
I worried about him. His eyes were a little
bloodshot and his demeanor was a little imbalanced.
Suddenly, a line from the movie ‘Kids’ popped into
my head: "You will grow up to be a vegetable, kid".
That certainly applied to Scott, if he kept doing so
many drugs.
"Where’s the stuff," I asked.
"Right here," he answered, pulling a crumpled
brown paper bag out of his pocket and handing it to
me.
I looked at the stuff indecisively, before
walking back over to my bed, opening my nightstand
drawer and dropping it in. I turned back to Scott.
"Hey," I said out of the blue, "you wanna go
swimming?"
Scott looked at me like I was crazy for about a
second before saying, "Sure."
The pool was automatically set to always be at a
sixty-five degree temperature. And for some
inexplicable reason I felt the need to swim. In the
back of my mind, I was hoping that Scott didn’t
drown.
******
"Jesus," Danny said, sitting up. He was panting
hard and his body was still thrumming from the
recent pleasure he had just experienced. He turned
to look at Roman who was lying next to him naked
under the sheets.
"I didn’t tell Liam about us … I promise," Roman
said, lifting his hand and trailing it down Danny’s
chest.
Danny’s heart thumped and his cock stirred.
Already? he wondered. Very gently, doing his
best to hide his reaction from Roman, he eased
Roman’s wandering hand away.
"We have to get back to the party," Danny said.
"Are you mad at me?" Roman asked.
"No," Danny sighed, "it’s just that … we
shouldn’t have done this here. Someone might have
seen us."
Roman reached up and ran his hand down Danny’s
muscular back. Danny felt the caress all the way
down to his toes.
"Don’t," he barely choked out.
"Why," Roman asked, the confusion evident in his
voice. "You like it."
Danny let out a breath of frustration. He had
followed Roman to the pool house and they had
fucked. Again. Danny hated himself. He felt as
though he were taking advantage of Roman. They had
started sleeping together three months ago in
secret. When he had discovered that Roman liked him
he had been surprised and flattered, but he had
never thought anything would come of it.
Then Roman had looked at him with his big brown
eyes filled with sexual curiosity and Danny’s
resolve had shattered. In a moment of weakness he
had kissed Roman and discovered that Roman was
inexperienced. He had told himself that he would
just teach Roman kissing, because the boy was in
sore need of a lesson.
The first time that Roman had tried to kiss
Danny, he had done so without an ounce of finesse.
He had just mashed his lips to Danny’s and swung his
face from side to side. It was Danny who had had to
teach him how to slow down, how to savor the taste
and enjoy the feel of the other person. Danny had
shown him how to open his mouth and slide his
tongue.
Once that invisible line had been crossed, Danny
could not go back. He had given in to temptation and
slept with Roman. And he hadn’t been able to stop.
Instead of his need lessening over time, it had only
increased. He had thought that after a while the two
of them would eventually be satisfied and the
relationship would end, but instead the opposite had
happened.
Now the longer they continued to sleep together,
the more the hunger that he had for Roman grew. None
of his friends knew about the relationship. In fact,
nobody knew. And Danny desperately wanted to keep it
that way. He knew he had to end this thing with
Roman before someone got hurt.
Roman noticed the look on Danny’s face and knew
that something was wrong. Stomach churning with
dread, he asked, "What’s wrong?"
"We can’t do this anymore, Roman," Danny replied.
He felt stiff and awkward having to end things this
way and added, "I’m sorry."
Roman didn’t say anything in response and Danny
waited. The silence stretched out, painful and taut,
until Danny didn’t know if he could take it anymore.
And then Roman rose and began putting on his clothes
without a word. Danny watched him get dressed,
struggling to find something to say. He knew that he
had hurt Roman, but he didn’t think he’d had any
other alternative. They couldn’t continue seeing
each other. Things were getting too serious. It was
better this way.
Roman fought not to break down in Danny’s
presence. The truth burned like acid, threatening to
overwhelm him but he held it together long enough to
get dressed and exit the pool house. Keeping his
head lowered so he wouldn’t have to make eye contact
with anyone, Roman headed straight for his car.
Danny didn’t follow after him - the way he had
run after Liam - and Roman tried not to let that
fact add to his pain. Knowing that Danny was through
with him made him want to curse. Not only because
his chest ached, but also because he had behaved so
stupidly. He had been so gullible. Roman had thought
the reason Liam invited him to this party was
because Danny had finally told his friends about
them and they wanted to hang out with him. How wrong
he had been.
No one would believe he'd slept with Danny
Stedquest anyway. Danny was the hottest guy at
school and he was just ... well, he was upset enough
as it was without adding to it by thinking about how
his peers saw him. Just knowing that he liked Danny,
but that Danny was in all likelihood ashamed of him
- why else would he insist on keeping their
relationship a secret? - and probably secretly had a
thing for Liam as well, made him even more upset.
He had just turned the keys to his ignition, when
he heard a knock at his window. He looked up to see
Troy Harrington standing by his door. He felt a
moments fear as he considered what the big boy could
want. Maybe Liam had told him that Roman had a crush
on him and he had now come to kick Roman’s ass?
Roman had only used Troy’s name because he hadn’t
been able to think of anyone else when Liam had
grilled him. It had been on the tip of his tongue to
say Danny, but he had come to his senses in time.
Since Troy was the only other person he knew of
at the party, he had felt it safe to use his name at
the time. Now, as he looked up at Troy’s face, he
wasn’t so sure it had been a wise decision.
"I was wondering if I could get a ride," Troy
said.
Danny let out a sigh of relief and said, "Sure.
Hop in."
Troy quickly went around the car and got in the
passenger side. It just so happened that Scott and
Liam were coming out of the house at the exact same
time, and Liam watched, stunned, as Roman and Troy
drove away.
|