"Undelivered"
Parts 1 - 4
By Raising Kane
Disclaimer: I'd love to own them. Oh the fun I could have! Unfortunately it's never gonna happen. I imply nothing about the sexual orientation, religious beliefs, etc. of any of the characters. This is simply a work of fiction produced by my twisted and adventurous mind.
Distribution: If you really want it... just ask first please.
Rating: NC-17
Characters: Chris Jericho, Shawn Michaels, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Sean Waltman, Triple H
Content: M/M Relationships, language, sex, angst
Notes: Spoilers for 12/27/04 Raw (kinda). This fic is set in a different WWE world. The wrestlers are given storylines to set up a "feud". (IE... Steph and Hunter's wedding, Hunter kicking Shawn out of DX, Lita getting knocked up by Kane) All promos are the work of the wrestlers to further the storylines, and match endings are NOT pre-determined. In other words, the matches are real. Sometimes storyline events cause real problems, which carry over into "real life" for them.
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Part 1 Chris couldn't seem to wipe the smirk off his face. Eric was finally right about something. Every person in that ring was unhappy to see Shawn Michaels announced as the guest referee for the chamber match. Of course, some of them were going to be more unhappy with it than the others. Chris had to bite his tongue not to laugh at Trips over-dramatized screaming of the word "No!" Jericho figured that's probably the first time he's ever said no to anything. That more than anything is why he couldn't get rid of that smirk. He also couldn’t figure out why Trips wasn't happy about it being Shawn. Last he'd heard the two of them were lovers. Something was definitely not right here. Maybe Shawn had finally wised up where Hunter was concerned. Then again, maybe it was just an elaborate setup to make the rest of them think they stood a chance in the Elimination Chamber. **** He just couldn't leave it alone. Why else would he be standing outside the hotel room door belonging to Shawn Michaels at 1 A.M.? It was pretty much well known in the fed that the two of them couldn't be in the same room for five minutes without going at it. It had made for one hell of a feud once upon a time, but now it tended to make everyone caught in the same place with the two of them jumpy. Of course only a few people knew the reasons behind the animosity and neither Chris nor Shawn had talked about it. People had talked about their chemistry in the ring together though. That chemistry resulted in what most considered to be the best match at Wrestlemania 19. The only question everyone had wondered over though was the delivery of the low-blow by Chris after the match. Chris tended to keep his emotions tightly in check. People had to wonder what had broken through that tight reign for him to lose enough control to let it get personal. As far as Chris was concerned, they could think about it all they wanted to, but he'd be damned before he admitted to anyone why he had felt it was justified. Looking back at it now, Chris realized that that retaliatory blow just might come back to bite him in the ass and cost him the title at the pay per view. That was part of his reason for this late night visit. Maybe if he apologized for his actions, Shawn would see fit to actually give him a fair shot in this. IF… and that was a big if, Shawn wasn't still caught up in Hunter's clutches. There was only one way to find out, and standing here staring at the door wasn't getting it done. Chris raised his fist and knocked on the door with three short raps. He was just about to turn and leave when he heard footsteps crossing the room to the door. As the door swung open he pasted a neutral expression on his face and waited for the obvious question. "What in the hell do you want, Jericho?" Obviously Shawn wasn't thrilled to see him standing at his door. "I was hoping we could talk. Clear a few things up between us." He knew it wasn't going to be easy, but he'd jump on the fast train to hell before he begged Shawn for anything. The best he could do was keep this as civil as possible and hope that would be enough. "Welcome to my lair, said the spider to the fly." Shawn opened the door wide and gestured with his arm for Chris to enter the room. "Very cute, Michaels." Chris smirked as he strolled into the room. "If you plan to eat me, I hope you'll at least make sure I enjoy it." As he turned back to look at him, he saw Shawn roll his eyes at him as he pushed the door shut. "Can the flirting Jericho. You want to get to the point? I've had a long day and I'd like to sleep sometime tonight." Chris let out a small huff. How could Shawn even think he'd flirt with him after what had happened in the past? He wasn't a glutton for punishment. Chris dropped gracefully into a chair next to the table. "Like I'd even consider flirting with you Michaels. Especially after what happened last…" No! He wasn't going to let Shawn know that it had affected him. At least not any more than he had to to get what he wanted. "What I wanted to know, is if you jumped back into Hunter's bed as soon as you got back. Unless he's hiding in the closet, he's obviously not here. So that answers that question. Unless he just hasn't shown up yet tonight? " Shawn was struggling not to let his mouth drop open. He walked over to the bed and dropped down so he was laying on his side with his head propped up on his hand. He raised his eyebrow and heavy on the drawl he replied, "Why would you care whose bed I'm gracing Chris? I hardly consider it your business." The nerve of some people! Chris was frozen in his seat. Even though their past should have prevented Chris from appreciating the sight in front of him, he couldn't deny that Shawn's casual pose on the bed was affecting him. Hell! Anytime he pictured Shawn and a bed at the same time, it was enough to make his whole body ache. Right now there was a certain part of him that was starting to ache, that was for sure. Damn. Why had he worn such tight jeans? He really hoped Shawn wouldn't notice the huge erection he was now sporting. "Of course it's my business!" He sputtered. "Just like it's the business of every guy in the chamber match! Look Shawn. I don't really care who you are doing. I just want to know if I actually have a chance at that title or if you plan to screw us all and help Hunter win it back. If you're in his pocket, so to speak, I'm not going to put my body on the line, killing myself for your enjoyment. If I've actually got a shot at it, you know I'll give it everything I've got." Shawn gave a short bark of laughter. "Gee, and here I thought you actually cared Jericho." Shawn's flippant response was enough to make Chris see red. He stood up and stormed towards the door. "I should have known I couldn't get an honest response from you Michaels. Thanks for wasting my time." " Oh would you shut up and sit down. I'll give you an answer. I just love watching you get all fired up." Shawn managed to hold in his laughter at the glare that Chris gave him. He waited for Chris to sit back down before he continued, "Hunter and I haven't been together, at least in the sense you are talking about, for a few years now. The last time we were together like that was around the time I was the Commish. You do remember the feud we had a while back, don't you? That fighting between us? All real. I don't tend to fuck someone I'm fighting with. As a matter of fact, that whole feud started because I refused to jump back into his bed when I returned. He talked to Vince about us playing out an angle where we were fighting. By the time the "angle" was over, we were barely speaking to each other. He couldn't stand the fact that part of the reason I came back was because I was interested in someone besides him." Chris's mouth dropped open in shock. He couldn't believe Shawn was lying to him! He couldn't control the biting tone of his voice when he replied, "Don't bother lying Michaels. I know better. Have you forgotten that you sent Hunter along with your reply to my letter? Not only did he tell me exactly what you thought of me, he took great pleasure in informing me that I never stood a chance because you were fucking him and that wasn't going to change. I can't believe I was considering apologizing for the things I said to you and for giving you that nut-shot. You deserved both. If you plan to lie, at least remember who it is you are lying to." He stood up to leave, but as he passed the bed, Shawn grabbed his arm and turned him to face him. "Wait!" Chris tried to jerk his arm free, but after the questions Shawn asked next, he stopped trying. "What the hell are you talking about? What letter?"
Part 2
"That's not funny Shawn." By all rights, Shawn should have gotten frostbite from the icy glare Chris was sending him. "Do I look like I'm laughing? Please. Just tell me. I honestly don't have a clue." From the puzzled look on Shawn's face he wasn't lying, but Chris wasn't sure he could drag it all up again. "Well Shawn, either you are one sadistic bastard or you really have no clue what I'm talking about. For your sake, I hope it's the latter. If you are jerking my chain, I won't just try to hurt you. I'll cripple you." "I know you have no reason to trust me, but I promise. I'm not jerking you around. Tell me." For a moment Shawn was sure that Chris was going to turn and leave without another word. Chris closed his eyes and let out a quiet sigh of resignation. When Shawn wanted to know something he was like a dog with a bone, he didn't let it go until he was finished. Chris sat on the bed and ran his hands over his face. "Fine. Let's get this over with. What do you remember about the time before December 17, 2002?" "Wasn't that the night you came out and…" Shawn remembered that night all too well. "Yes, but we'll get back to that. What do you remember before that night?" Chris looked up into Shawn's eyes. "Well, Hunter and I were fighting for the title, of course. I don't think that's what you mean though." When Chris remained silent, Shawn continued. "I remember that at the time I thought you and I were becoming friends. We'd run into each other about two weeks before that, literally. We started talking about the business. We met up in catering a couple days later and that time we talked about personal stuff. Likes, dislikes, what have you… Two days later, Vince told us we needed to come up with something to start a feud between us for the show." "I'm surprised you remember. You had to have noticed that I was… a little awestruck. We'd talked before that, but not a real conversation. I was happy that we were getting to know each other. Really happy that we were going to be working together. That stuff I said about you being my idol in this business, it was all true. The part I left out was that I had also had a…" Chris paused for a moment, looked down at his hands and let the rest rush out, "slight crush on you for years. During the time we spent together working on an approach to our story line, it grew from a crush to…real interest. I'm not going to say I was in love with you, it was too soon, but the potential was there." Chris glanced quickly at Shawn and noticed the surprised look on his face. Before Shawn could comment he started talking again. "I know you may find it hard to believe, but I have a problem with confidence. When it comes to my personal feelings I tend to be a bit… shy, but I wanted to let you know how I was feeling. When I find it too hard to say something, I write it down. So that's what I decided to do. I wrote you a letter. When I got to the arena that night, I asked where you were. One of the tech assistants had seen you knocking on Hunter's locker room door." Shawn knew he should explain why he had stopped to talk to Hunter that day, but he decided to wait until Chris finished whatever it was he was going to say. He was still trying to process the fact that Chris had had some kind of feelings for him. He hadn't had a clue at the time that Chris felt anything other than maybe friendship. He thought to himself that tonight might be a night full of big revelations, but he wasn't sure if all of them would be welcome ones. "You know Hunter and I have never gotten along. He's tried to bury me at every turn. That didn't matter though. I wanted to make sure you got the letter before our segment that night. I was hoping that maybe we'd have a chance to talk about it before that, so I wouldn't have to wonder how you were going to react. So I went to his locker room. You weren't there. He told me that you would be back in a few minutes. My nerves were kind of on edge, I wasn't sure I would be able to hand it directly to you. So I handed him the letter and asked him to give it to you when you got back. He said it wouldn't be a problem. I left and went back to my locker room." "Chris, I…" "Shawn, just let me finish this. If I have to go through this again I want to do it as quickly as possible." For the first time since Shawn had asked Chris to stay, he moved. Chris could feel the bed shift as Shawn sat beside him, but he refused to look at him. He stared down at his hands and dropped his head slightly in an effort to keep Shawn from seeing his face. He didn't want Shawn to see exactly how much this next part was going to affect him. As Shawn sat down next to him, he could tell from Chris's demeanor and posture that whatever he said next was going to be hard for him. He only hoped that once he knew the truth, he could set things right for Chris. Maybe ease some of the pain. When Chris started talking again, his voice was so quiet and pain-filled that Shawn could barely hear what he was saying. "About half an hour later, Hunter showed up in my locker room. He was holding the opened letter. He said he had a reply from you then he tossed the letter at me. I remember sitting there, looking at him and seeing the smirk on his face. I still remember word for word what he said next." Shawn watched surreptitiously as a tear dropped from Chris's face to his hands. His breath caught in his throat and his hard began to ache for Chris's pain. He never expected to hear what he heard next. "He said 'Shawn wanted me to tell you, that there is no way in hell he'd be caught with a pathetic loser like you. He said you are a waste of oxygen, Chris. He said he doesn't need a no-talent wanna-be using him to get to the top. ' That's what he said Chris. That was after we got done laughing about your little letter, of course. And the real point is, what he thought of the letter is irrelevant, because you never had a chance. Shawn is mine. He is my lover. He lets me fuck him every night. So you keep your pathetic little attraction for him to yourself. You will never have him. Understood? Then he left." Shawn watched as more tears fell to Chris's hands. Inside he was seething. "It shouldn't have hurt that much. Knowing what you thought about me. But it did. It hurt so much. When it was time for the promo, I went out there with the intention of doing the one we'd talked about. When I got out there though, seeing you, I couldn't stop myself. I didn't plan that. It just came from inside me and I had to let it out. I needed to let the anger out at you, because if I didn't I would have broken down right there in the ring. You kicked me then. I'm not gonna deny that I probably deserved it, but that just added to the rage I felt at you. As soon as I could get out of there that night I did. I drank myself sick that night… hell that whole month, except for when I had to be at a show. I didn't want you or Hunter to know how much I was hurting. If it weren't for Adam coming to my house one night, I wouldn't even be…" Chris burst into tears, no longer trying to hide it. Shawn reached over and pulled him into his arms. Chris struggled at first, but then he settled into Shawn's arms and cried on his shoulder. "Chris, you didn't try to…" Shawn asked quietly, trying not to startle the man he was attempting to comfort. He needed to know, so he'd had to ask. "No." Chris whispered in-between sobs. When he'd calmed himself a bit he explained the night in question while Shawn gently stroked his hair. "I was drinking tequila that night. A lot of it. Last I remember, I was halfway through my second bottle for the day. Adam had heard a few rumors about my behavior and he stopped in to check on me. When I wouldn't open the door, he used the spare key. When he found me I was passed out cold and he tried everything he could think of to bring me out of it. When that didn't work, he called for an ambulance and went to the hospital with me. Alcohol poisoning was the consensus. Vince managed to keep it out of the papers. He made me see a counselor as a condition for me to keep working. I promised him it wouldn't happen again and I stuck to it. So that's it Shawn. Your explanation."
Part 3
"Can I… can I say something now?" Chris heard the scratchiness in the normally smooth drawl and peeked up at Shawn. He couldn't understand why Shawn had tear-tracks down his cheeks. He needed to know. "Shawn, why are you crying?" Chris lifted his hand to Shawn's face and gently wiped the tears from his cheeks. Shawn closed his eyes at Chris's touch forcing a few more tears down his cheeks. "Chris, I know you probably won't believe me, but I swear what I'm going to say is the truth." "I remember that night. When I went back to talk to Hunter, he was really pissed off about something. Until now, I had no clue about what it was. We talked a bit about the situation with Sean. I won't get into it now, because that's his story. The whole time he kept giving me dirty looks and I figured it was because I'd turned him down yet again. I left his locker room to get ready for our segment. The next thing I knew you were cutting your promo and it was nowhere near what we had planned. I didn't know why you changed it. I tried to talk to you afterwards and you just left." He opened his eyes and stared into Chris's own, hoping to convey his sincerity. "Hunter never gave me the letter. I never read it. I didn't send him to answer you. Most importantly, I never would have said something so blatantly untrue about you. I never would have wanted to hurt you like that." They sat quietly for a moment. Shawn raging internally at the unfairness of what had happened and at the lies that had been told. Chris was digesting the fact that everything he'd believed about Shawn for the last two years was based on Hunter's lies. Finally Shawn's rage boiled over. He walked over to the table and slammed his hands down on top of it. Chris jumped at the loud noise after the quiet of the last few moments. "He knew! Damn it! He knew what it was going to do to you and he damn sure knew how much it was going to hurt me. The next time I see that bastard, I'm gonna hurt him. I'm going to hurt him badly. I'm going to make him suffer for the lies he told and for how much they hurt you, Chris. I swear I'm going to get even with him." Chris hadn't said anything since his confession. Shawn turned to look at him and realized that it had finally sunk in for him. He watched as anger flashed in Chris's eyes. He took a step back and waited for him to unleash it. He didn't have to wait long. Chris's fits of rage were legendary in the locker room. He watched as Chris reached for the closest thing he could find, which happened to be Shawn's suitcase. The next thing he knew it had exploded against the far wall, showering the room in clothes and toiletries. He noticed the dent in the wall from the force of the suitcase hitting it and decided to back up to the nearest wall to give Chris more room to vent. And vent he did. The ceramic lamp from the bedside table shattered into around one hundred pieces as it went the way of the suitcase. The first chair was smashed over the tabletop and ended up in about three pieces. Chris flipped the table over on it's top and gave it a hard shove sending it perilously close to the balcony doors. The second chair went flying and with a loud crack and sizzle took out the television screen. The painting on the wall was slammed repeatedly against the floor cracking the frame before Chris put his foot through the canvas. The phone cord and all was ripped from the wall and ended up in pieces somewhere in the vicinity of the bathroom door. With a small smirk he picked up the remote to the television and whipped it at the door that led to the hallway outside. As Shawn watched Chris destroy the room, he was struck by the thought that it was a good thing he hadn't gotten a suite instead, although Chris probably would have appreciated more ammunition. If it hadn't been for his mood, he would have laughed at that thought. He was grateful that Chris was aiming for the walls and not the balcony doors. That would have been a huge mess. He really hoped the next room wasn't occupied or they'd be getting a visit from security shortly. Not that it mattered. He'd simply pay for the damages and slip them a little extra to leave it alone. He'd end up paying for them anyway, but it was worth it if that was what Chris needed to feel better. Finally having run out of ammunition, Chris dropped to his knees beside the bed and leaned his head against the mattress. Chris's harsh rapid breathing was the only sound in the room. After a minute, he remembered Shawn and raised his head to locate him. Finding him leaning against the wall, he looked at him waiting for some kind of reaction to the destruction. Shawn graced him with a smile. Chris couldn't stop himself from asking, "So, was it as good for you as it was for me?" Shawn scratched his head and replied, "Hey, I finally got to witness one of the legendary fits of Jericho. I'm suitably impressed." After another minute of silence he heard Chris whisper, "Sorry. I'll pay for the damages." "Don't worry about it. If you hadn't done it, I'd probably have gotten around to doing it myself." Both men laughed. They started trying to set the room to rights. Well as right as they could get it. Chris was setting the table on its legs and Shawn was putting pieces of the broken lamp in the trash when Chris finally asked, "Shawn? What did you mean when you said he knew it was going to hurt you?" Shawn let out a bitter laugh. "Haven't you figured it out yet? The person I was interested in when I came back, the one Hunter was trying to keep me away from? Who else could have been special enough to get the attention of the Heartbreak Kid, but the King of the World?"
Part 4
"What did you say?" It came out so softly that Shawn wasn't even sure he'd heard it at all. Even if he hadn't actually said it out loud, the question was there in Chris's wide blue eyes. "It was you, Chris." Shawn's answer came out just as quietly as the question that prompted it. He wasn't sure he should say anymore, but Chris deserved to know the truth. "From the moment I found out I was coming back I hoped we'd end up on the same show. When word got out you were coming to Raw, I couldn't wait to see you. I didn't want to push you right away, with changing schedules and getting used to working with different people again. Then it took me awhile to find out if… let me put it bluntly, if you swung that way. Know what I mean? After that it was Hunter pulling his jealous fit and I didn't want to expose you to that. Towards the end of my feud with him, I figured it was safe." Shawn paused for a breath before he continued. "We ran into each other and started to get to know each other. I thought maybe after we'd been working together for a couple of weeks that I'd start sounding things out. Before that could happen, you came out and cut your promo. When you looked at me, I swear the hatred in your eyes about burned a hole through me. I couldn't figure out what had changed. It seemed as if every word you were saying was something you honestly believed. It hurt. So in typical fashion I reacted before thinking and kicked you a bit harder than I planned. It just seemed to escalate from there. You wouldn't even speak civilly to me. I know why now, but at the time it hurt to know you hated me. Especially when I had no clue what I'd done." While Shawn was talking Chris had leaned against the wall behind him. By the time Shawn was done, he was sitting on the floor with his head leaning back on the wall. His eyes were closed and he wore an expression of anguish. "Chris? Are you okay?" When he answered, his voice was dull as if the life had been sucked out of him. "No. No, Shawn. I'm not okay. Do you realize what you just said? It could have all been so different. If I'd just waited for you, given you the letter myself, Hunter wouldn't have been able to keep us apart. Because I was stupid enough to leave it with him, I let him hurt both of us. It's my fault. I said and did things that hurt you when I could have prevented it. If I weren't such a damn coward, we might have been together all this time. It doesn't matter that we found out now, because we can't ever get that time back." "No! Look at me." Shawn dropped to his knees in front of Chris and slid his hand over Chris's cheek until he opened his eyes. "I will not let you blame yourself for this Chris. There is no one to blame, except Hunter. He was being purposefully spiteful, because he couldn't have what he wanted. You aren't to blame for that. If it hadn't been the letter, he would have kept looking until he found a weakness in one of us. He's the one to blame and I'm going to make sure he atones for his lies. I'll make him pay for hurting you, sweetheart." Chris whimpered slightly at hearing the endearment from Shawn. He opened his mouth to speak, but Shawn covered his lips with one finger. "Don't say anything right now. We have all the time we want to figure out what we want from this point. We've both had a very rough night. You look exhausted." Chris shook his head slightly and a small smile lit Shawn's face. "I know we don't know what's going to happen yet, but I want to ask a favor from you. Can you…would you sleep here tonight? I have some sweats you can borrow to sleep in. I may not end up with what I want when this is all said and done, but would you let me hold you in my arms for tonight?" As Chris opened his mouth to speak, Shawn held his breath. "Actually, my room is only three doors down." Shawn felt an ache start in his chest. He was going to leave. "I have sweats in my suitcase too. If we wear those we won't have to worry about picking glass out of our asses in the morning. I'm pretty sure all your stuff is covered in it." Damn, Shawn hadn't considered that at all. "I'd guess the bed in my room is a safer bet as well. You…you can stay there with me, if you still want to." The ache faded and was replaced with a warm, comforting feeling. Shawn brushed his lips softly against Chris's forehead then held out his hand to help him from the floor. "You know I want to, Chris." Shawn grabbed his key-card and followed Chris out of his room and down the hall. Chris pulled his card from his pocket and as he slid it through the reader, he leaned his forehead against the door and took a deep breath. Then he turned and grabbed Shawn's hand and pulled him into the room behind him. Chris walked over to his suitcase and pulled out two pair of sweatpants. He handed the red ones to Shawn and kept the blue ones for himself. "I'm going to go change. I'll be right back." With that Shawn ducked into the bathroom, leaving Chris to change in the bedroom. Chris changed quickly then sat on the edge of the bed and waited for Shawn to emerge from the bathroom. He didn't have long to wait. Shawn stepped out a moment later, clad in the red sweats and walked over to the bed. Chris shot up off the bed and headed quickly to the bathroom, "I'll be right out." With a chuckle Shawn turned down the covers and settled himself in the middle of the bed. Shawn was really starting to like this shy side of Chris. It was so different from the character he portrayed to the audience. He'd have to be careful not to scare him off by moving too fast. He had waited way too long for this chance to risk losing Chris due to his own impatience. After a few minutes, Shawn was starting to wonder if Chris was ever going to come out of the bathroom. A minute later he heard the door open and Chris walked back into the room. With a quick glance at Shawn, Chris dropped his eyes to the floor and walked over to the bed. As he climbed onto the bed, Shawn noticed the slight tinge of pink in Chris's cheeks. How incredibly cute! Shawn's grin stretched ear to ear as he grabbed Chris's hand and pulled him closer to the center of the bed. Shawn lay down on his back and held his arms open wide, waiting to see if he'd have to coax Chris to where he wanted him. With another shy peek at Shawn, Chris made up his mind. He could do this! He practically launched himself into Shawn's arms and buried his face in Shawn's neck. As his arms wound around Shawn's waist he let out a small sigh of relief. Shawn managed to suppress a groan at the warm puff of air against his neck. It wasn't that difficult though because he was also trying to remember how to breathe. It's not like Chris was exactly a lightweight. He wasn't about to say a word though because Chris was finally exactly where he wanted him. Shawn stroked one hand gently over Chris's hair and leaned down to press a kiss to his forehead. "Goodnight, sweetheart." Shawn felt the brush of Chris's lips against his throat and his quietly murmured, "Sweet dreams, Shawn." Shawn continued to stroke Chris's hair and realized that Chris was already fast asleep. As he felt his eyes drifting closed his last thought was that with Chris in his arms, sweet dreams were guaranteed. **** |