This is the hard line: People who make their living off the backs of our kids need to be ACCOUNTABLE!!!!!!!!!

Another hard truth: You have to be looking ahead 5 years to what you want to happen for your child and work for it now.

Take a breath and read this: No matter how hard you cry you cannot buy back the time you wasted worrying about hurting people's feelings. You must educate yourself and advocate for what your family really needs to survive.

What is it you need? Write it down.... help in your home? a break? a lift? an augmentative communication device? a van with a lift? a one-on-one aide at school? Reach out and get it. Do what it takes to get it so your family can stay intact. Contact other families and ask how they did it.

If you ask for services from your regional center's case manager and they don't help you, then call their supervisor. Call up the line until you get to the head of the Department of Mental Health for your state. Case managers are supposed to provide services to your family to help decrease stress, not give you more. They make money off your child every time they talk to you so you should get good service from them. Be a consumer! Be a voter!

Please take care of yourself and your relationships. This life is hard and takes its toll on your health (back problems, arthritis, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome...) and can break up even the best relationships without constant attention to nurturing each other. Be careful with each other.

You must must must get connected with the adult disability world. They have all been there before and can help.

Remember, ALL people belong in our homes, schools, churches and communities.

Look at this picture. Can you tell who is disabled? Can you tell who is able bodied? Can you tell who is morally disabled? Emotionally disabled? A saint? A sinner? Looking at us you can only guess. Looking at you we can only guess.... get it?

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