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| || Roleplay Number | | || People Used || | || Record || | || People Gettin Ass Whipped Next|| |
| 1 | Vinnie Mac, Booker T, John Cena | (1-0-0) | Mike Awesome In a eHw Stretcher Match |
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John Cena is seen standing outside under a bridge talking to the camera in a recording from yesterday afternoon.
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena: Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo! All of a sudden people say I can't do it, the real truth is I'm the dude who get the shit brewin'! Now I'm in the number one contender's match for the Deathmatch Strap, I hit Mike Awesome so hard he'll think it's a gat! I roll out in my truck he roll in in his van, the truth is, I do what no one can! I dominate the world, especially eHw, Mike Awesome, yo wife aint even in luv with you! Everyone hates you, and knows the truth, no one can beat me in my prime or my youth! Now here in Portland, Oregon, we be holdin it down, all yall know we the hottest shit around! Now Booker T has his World Title shit, while I got the Deathmatch Title through a lil bitch! Mike Awesome's the bitch and Holly's a fu*kin legend, I'm at restauraunts, Awesome's at 7-11's! Maybe he should change his name to big ass chump, cuz' all he gonna do is see me Pump It Up! F-U and the 5 Knuckle Shuffle for your ass, to bad that you'll be even uglier with a full face blood mask! Now I see all these people sayin I'm wack, only way ya'll ride like me is if you make a car jack! We got people oversea's holdin it down in Iraq, got more heart then Mike Awesome does crack! Mike Awesome think that I'm some kinda White Trash, won't be thinkin that after I whoop his ass! Now finally I here 'Cena's gonna do it' New Deathmatch Champion now that's what's cookin! Now rumor is, Buff Bagwell is in the eHw, and he's ready to rule, so John Cena here challenges you to a duel! After I win the Deathmatch Title, your my first pick to go wild! I'ma beat you down in a match, show you I'm Rookie of the Year and keep the patch! Then I'ma tell you that I'll whoop yo ass, but it won't be just tellin but the beatin's gonna be fast! And even if I somehow don't win the damn title, the next time I lose is'nt gonna be for a while! So now you tell me that I fight like a chump, well bein the champ that I am, I'll squash you like a runt! Now there's a lil thing that's on my mind, how the hell am I supposed to fall behind?! All the people say that Mike Awesome will beat JC, Mike Awesome.... YOU CAN'T SEE ME!
John Cena walks away as the camera fades into a commercial.
YJ Stinger
eHw Stretcher Match
John Cena DVD
John Cena shows up backstage talking to the camera.
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena: People, people, people, welcome to the land of Mr. John Cena, Mike Awesome here is tryin to mess with the Beantown Beater! I be in that ring layin a Smackdown, but we in eHw so it aint hard to track down, the docta is here and he here to stay, and Mike Awesome gonna feel like everybody! Now eHw is havin it's Stretcher Match thanks to my challenge, now everybody know's that I smash Mike Awesome like a motha fu*^in' maggot,ya'll wanna mess here wit tha docta, well ya'll can go get the hell on witcha moma! Mike Awesome lost his title and I ruined his pride, he better not wear a white shirt or he'll look like a bloody bride! He complainin man he got screwed, he got more crack then Bad Boyz 2! And hell nah I aint gonna snitch, I know someone else who think he a bitch! Now all of you know I did Awesome's hoe, so after this match, Awesome's gonna want to go, and then again it's time to party, we both be bloody messes more tables and ladders then E, C and the Hardyz! And damn boy he sure as hell smells, I'll be hittin him wit more shot's then Bonzi Wells! When he's done with me, he aint gonna have another standoff, dunk his ass like Zach Fu%*in Randolph! There's one big problem with you Mike, your girlfriend and wife are both total dykes! That mean's they think you a woman, well so did I, but it looks like you just got Bookend! Now F-U Awesome, yeah you got a few Title's, after losin to me maybe you should toss em! Now maybe I don't have as many Title's, I ain't no Ricky Steamboat cuz' he one of my idols! I ainy like him, cuz' I'm still young, you wanna mess with me, I'm shootin you like a gun! And don't forget this dude I am Untouchable! I'ma bigger People's Champ then the damn Brahma Bull! And then there's this story, that I've heard, maybe I should'nt take these peoples word! Now then again I did win my debut match, now I'm facin Mike Awesome, and I'ma break his back! One of us two is leavin' the arena, the other's gonna be wearin a head cast just like a beaner! So now I stand here givin you a lecture, Mike Awesome is gonna be leavin on a Stretcher! Maybe I'm not the strongest in the biz, but Mike Awesome looks and fights like a kid! Now I wanna tell you that, I used to respect you, now when people talk about the World Title race they don't expect you. But one last thing that you need to know, is that I really don't care where the hell you go. But now the only thing that you gonna realize, is that you gonna be hospitalized! Now Mike Awesome, one last thing, maybe you should go out and get a drink. Because you gonna feel some real ass pain, there's nothin in the world that feel the same. Now I'ma go out there, and put on my Philly gear, so John Cena chant's will be all you can hear! So now I wanna tell you somethin' G', John Cena says... You Can't See Me!
Cena start's to walk away but turns into the entrance way to go down to the ring.
"Basic Thuganomics" hits and John Cena makes his way to the ring to a roar of cheers. Cena grabs a mic but before he can start talking the crowd fills the arena with "CENA!" Chants.
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena: Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo! We in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania! Yo, Tuesday at Turmoil in Portland, Oregon, I have a match. A match against.... Mike Awesome! A Stretcher Match is what we pullin! Yo, chill, we here on the East Coast chillin out in Philly, Mike Awesome, the only way you'll beat me is if you can kill me! And Bret Hart, you don't stand a chance, you look like Mike Awesome's date, to the 8th Grade Prom Dance! And now someone be sayin, that I aint good enough, another fu&*in accuser, whose sucked cock to much! But I realize that time will tell, Mike Awesome I bought you some Axe, so you don't smell! Now Mike I rea.....
Just then Paul Heyman's music hit's and he makes his way to the ring.
~The Fat Jack Ass~ Paul Heyman: John, John, John, you see, you really have to understand, I run the eHw not you! So maybe you should understand that...
"Heyman Sucks!" Chant's fill the arena but John Cena still does not have a smile on his face.
~The Fat Jack Ass~ Paul Heyman: People, will you let me talk to the wigger of eHw please? Thank you, now, John, me and you have never gotten along and that is not going to change in eHw! You see, I despise you John Cena, but I'm doing what's best for the people, which is seeing you get the crap kicked out of you by Mike Awesome in an eHw Stretcher Match! Now, a little preview would be something like..... this!
Just then The A-Train's, Matt Morgan, Nathan Jones and the Big Show come down to the ring as John Cena takes off his shirt and get's ready for action.
Before they could attack John Cena, Booker T throws Cena a chair and grabs one himself as they take out each and every one of the superstar's attacking them.
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena: Mike Awesome! Was this another one of your lil' bitchy ass tricks?! It don't matter who you send against me! I'ma take em out! You see that chair shot I hit Nathan Jones wit?! I just took out combined fifteen-hundred pounds of men! And that's how many men you'll have to put down on me if you wanna hold me down in a stretcher! I will get the F-U that decides the match! I will F-U onto a god damn stretcher if I got to boy! You will not only leave this arena in a stretcher, you got a good damn chance of leavin eHw in a stretcher! Now Bret Hart... Mike Awesome.... YOU CAN'T SEE ME!
John Cena does the "You Can't See Me!" To all superstar's downed in the ring and makes his way backstage.
John Cena is seen getting changed in his personal lockerroom. Just Then Torrie Wilson walks in.
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena: Damn! Torrie Fu&^in' Wilson, well, you in John Cena's lockerroom, so, what's the problem?
~The Playboy Cover Girl~ Torrie ~F'n~ Wilson: John, well, you've asked me to be your manager, and I've thought it over, and I.... I want to be more than just friends. Now, I know you might not say yes and if you say no I'll still be your friend and manager and all but...
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena: WHOA! Torrie, Torrie, Torrie, whoever says no to your beautiful ass, is either High, or gay! I mean hell, if I was a girl I would wanna date me to, and I am a guy, and I wanna date you, so maybe it's a lil more proper if I ask you this as a lil shocker, Torrie Wilson, I'ma get down on my knees, and I'ma propose to you, baby please, be my girl for as long as we can, and after a while I'ma be on my knees again, for you to be my world! Cuz' your beautiful ass is better than dyamonds and pearls!! But Torrie, there is a lil problem, I don't want you at the ring during my match with Mike ~The Dyke~ Awesome, cuz, even though I'm gonna beat him down, there's gonna be a lot of brutality goin around! So Torrie, yes you are my girl, but this brutal match is gonna be the best in the world! Now Mike Awesome, I hope you listenin, put a finger on Torrie, your whole body be blisterin'! I'ma throw you through a table and all that cuz' I am JC, now Mike Awesome dawg....
~The Man Who Screwed Mike Awesome~ John ~You Can't See Me~ Cena and
~The Playboy Cover Girl~ Torrie ~F'n~ Wilson: YOU CAN'T SEE ME!
