Letting go

They say that if you love someone, you should let him go. If he comes back to you, then he is yours. If he doesn't, then he was never meant to be. But no one in her right mind would let someone she loves, go. Yet, we all want to do the right thing because if we ever want to look back, we want to be able to say that at least, at one time in our lives, we were magnanimous and brave. Still, magnanimity costs. And courage hurts.

The truth is that our first instinct when someone we love pulls away, is to hold on. We hold on because the thought of losing the one person we love, is too painful to bear. And in our pain, we lose sight of what is sane. We only see the need to stop someone from fleeing and so instead of giving way, we block the path of his get-away.

But it is madness to cling on to someone who perhaps no loner wants you. Let him go. What are you afraid of ? That he won't be back? The truth is that you can't really hold on to someone who doesn't want you anymore, anyway, so there really is no point in holding on. You might as well, let go with dignity and grace.

Letting go is difficult because it is against human nature. It is saying " No" when you want to say "Yes". It is resisting the tide. It is walking away when want to stay. It is transcending our humanity and rising to our divinity. Letting go commands us to be larger than life.

Don't be so hard on yourself if you cannot let go. No one ever said it would be easy. But if you know what is good for you, then, you must learn to do what is hard and what is painful to do. For if you really want to know if this love is meant for you, then, you must have the courage to submit it to its final test.

Of course it will be terrifying. Of course it will hurt. And if he doesn't come back, then, of course it will be devastating. But there is life after the tears and the heartbreak if you can let go of your love and hold on to your faith. You cannot will what is not willed for you. And in the end, you will realize that what is not willed for you is not what is right for you.

When you're old and gray, you want to be able to look back and say, "Once upon a time, I fell in love and let him go because I wanted to know if the winds would bring him back to me. And he did." Of course, the story could also end differently. "The winds failed to bring him back to me. But he turned out to be the wrong man for me." I think that all stories can end happily. They may not always end the way we want them to but then who wants a boring, predictable story?

If you let someone you love go and he doesn't come back to you, then, he can't be the one for you. How can he be? If a man cannot pick out the gem from among the stones, then he cannot be a very wise and worthy man. If he can't see you as the better woman, then maybe, there is a better man out there for you.

They say it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I say it is better to have loved and let go than to have loved and held on to the wrong one all this time.

-Author unknown