We Haven't Got A Title Yet

It was a yummy, sunny day in the land of Ainalivna. Unfortunately, the people who lived in this land were NOT so happy. See, they had no ruler. Thus, they had no Twinkies. For it was a law of Ainalivna that the ruler and the ruler alone could distribute Twinkies. They of course had lots of other food, nutritious and junkie, but Twinkies were a way of life for the Ainalivnans.

There was a huge vault where the Twinkies were kept, but ever since their last ruler had suddenly disappeared mysteriously, they had no one to give them Twinkies. They of course could have broken into the vault and stolen the Twinkies, but it would not have been right, and the Ainalivnans didn't want to go to the trouble besides.

A few blue moons later, the job was done for them when there was an explosion in the castle. The Ainalivnan's all rushed to the vault of Twinkies. The twinkies were slowly dissapearing one by one, and afterward a loud noise followed.

They stared in awe at this sight. What could it be that would eat Twinkies so heftily? Surely it was not the king, because he wouldn't be as smart to drop an anvil on the vault.

A man in this land called Inspector Blorng went up to the castle and asked the guard permission to inspect the vault. The guard said, "Certainly," and Blorng proceeded to, of course, inspect.

He'd been expecting to find, say, a mysterious medallion...or a mysterious design carved into a wall...or a mark left somewhere. But all he turned up was a red baseball cap with two holes cut in the top. He presented it before the entire land of Ainalivna and all puzzled over it. What could this MEAN?

So there was called a royal ball to see whom the cap fit. Everyone from all the neighboring lands had been sent an invitation..

Meanwhile in the land of Anvilania...

"What am I gonna do?" cried Wakko Warner, jumping from a huge anvil.
"Get a new hat. The prop man is bound to have one," said Yakko.
Suddenly a large pile of hats appeared. Wakko tried every hat on, from top hats to golf caps to beanie caps, but none were his own.

Wakko sighed. He looked in the reflection of a large anvil. He looked like Yakko now, except with no pants. It just wasn't the same. He tossed a twinkie in the air, and ate it with one big gulp.

Dot glanced at herself in the reflection of another anvil. "Well," she said, smoothing her dress down. "You could always go back and get it."
Wakko looked horrified. "I can't do that!" he said.
Yakko leaned on a shorter anvil and said, "Well, why not?"
Wakko sighed and said, "I don't know how I got there!!"
Dot looked puzzled. "Well how did you get there in the first place if you didn't know how?"
Wakko replied, "Twinkie Radar."
"Twinkies. Go fig," said Dot to no one in particular.
Yakko said, "So, the ole Twinkie Radar's down?"
"No. I ate all the Twinkies," said Wakko, grinning with his tongue hanging out.

One of the Anvilianians walked up to them carrying a large scroll. "Hey, I can't move this scroll. My mouse is broken," said Wakko.
"No, not that kinda scroll..this," said Dot, pulling out an ancient looking scroll tablet thingy.
"ooooh, that kinda scroll," said Wakko.
"Your Hinus," said the citizen.
"My hinus is fine, but if ya don't stop calling me that your hinus is gonna be in an anvil sandwich," said Yakko.
Wakko reached into Yakko's think bubble and munched down the Anvil sandwich.
"King Yakko, there shall be a royal fest in Ainalivna tommorow night for a new king. The king will be determined by the wearer of the cap," said the citizen.
"Isn't this a little reminiscent of Cinderella?" said Dot.

"Cap? MY cap? MY RED CAP?" exclaimed Wakko.
"Yes, brother of the Royal Hinus," the citizen replied.
"One more time..." Yakko muttered.
"And if I went to Ainalivna and it fit me, I'd get to be king?"
"Yes, brother of the Royal Hinus," replied the citizen again.
Yakko grinned wickedly. "Would someone stop this man from calling me 'Royal Hinus?'" And an anvil was painted in over the man's head, and he was squooshed.
"FABOO!!!!" Wakko yelled.

Another messenger was sent. He carried a large tablet. "I don't have that much indigestion. A small tablet would have been fine," said Wakko.
"Oh brother," said Yakko. "Wakko, the writer means a writing tablet."
"Ooooo. Okay," said Wakko, sprinkling some salt on an anvil and chomping it down.
"Your royal hi..Yakko. I shall be thy guide on the way to Ainalivna," said the messenger.
"Faboo! TWINKIES!" cried Wakko.
"No need," said Yakko and Dot.
Wakko started to float in the air towards the smell of twinkies, so Yakko tied a rope to an anvil, and then tied it around Wakko's waist.
"Twinkieeees!" cried Wakko.
"Yes, yes, they are Twinkies, and you'll rule over 'em all if we can get to Ainalivna," Dot said.
"Hey, if I stored a whoooole bunch of Ding-Dongs in a vault in MY castle..." pondered Yakko.
Wakko glanced dazedly toward Ainalivna, mumbling, "Twinkietwinkietwinkietwinkie..."
"Know what, sibs?" Yakko said.
"What?"
"This trip is gonna be boring. Cut to the next scene."

The Ainalivnan Festival was very nice, indeed. EVERYONE was there, including a short man who looked rather like a chicken, a mime, and a small white laboratory mouse. There was a long table stretched out through the banquet hall, filled with M&Ms, Raisinettes, all kinds of candy bars, Whoppers, Cheez-Its, Hot Tamales, Twizzlers, EVERYTHING IMAGINABLE. There were hamburgers and hotdogs, pizza and popcorn, twelve kinds of pies, and every single soda pop known to man.

And Wakko still roped to the Anvil, stretched his body out and ate every bite of food left over after everyone had had their serving. "aaahhhhh," he said, smiling, toungue hanging out, and laying on the floor next to his anvil.
The next most intriguing thing in Ainalivna was this huge line. Thousands of people stood in a single file line, to see if the hat did fit them.
And while they did stand there, Wakko ate what was left of their food, plates and all.
Eventually there were only 828 people left in line. By this time Wakko had eaten everything edible in sight, including the anvil he had been tied to.
"This is not going to work," said Yakko, sighing. "Sure it will! We'll just be here for a few hundred decades," Dot said sarcastically.
Yakko grinned again. "I know what we can do."
Wakko looked up excitedly. "Make bubbles with our spit?"
"Guess again."
Dot thought (oooh it rhymes). "Scream, 'CHOCLATE WAFFLES CHOCOLATE WAFFLES AAAGGGHHHH' and do the polka?"
"Nnnnope."
"Make a GOOKIE?"
"Take lessons on being cute?"
"Both wrong. LET'S CUT IN LINE!"
"Ooh, fun," said Wakko, dashing up to the person behind the person behind the person behind the person trying on the hat. Yakko and Dot followed.

"'Scuse me, mister," said Dot, poking the man's arm.
"Yes?" he said, looking just *slightly* annoyed.
"Have you ever eaten green pancakes?"
"Ahhh, no, I can't say that I have..." said he, looking more than a bit confused.
"Well, try some!" cried Wakko, producing a box from nowhere that read: "INSTANT GREEN PANCAKES (JUST ADD WATER)." In the next five seconds, Yakko had opened the box, Dot had poured water in a bowl, Wakko had dumped the pancake mix in, Yakko stirred it up, Dot made pancakes out of it, and Wakko stuffed them into the man's mouth.
"I AM OUTRAGED!" bellowed the man.
"Nice to meet you. Mind if I call you Aloysius?" said Wakko, leaping into his arms and honking his nose.

"What are you? A wack?" cried the man holding Wakko's prized hat.
"If the hat fits," said Yakko.
Wakko hugged 'Outraged' and said, "Sorry, but I hafta get me hat back."
"Excuse me, but you cut in line," said the hat man.
"Excuse me, but there's over 800 people in this line, and we were only trying to save you the trouble," replied Dot.
"No, go to the end of the line," said the hat man.
"But mister," said Wakko, leaping into the hat man's arms.
"Let go of me!" he cried, trying to pry Wakko off him.
"Let me handle this," said Dot. "Aw, c'mon mister, let my brother try on the hat," she said batting her eyes.
"Stop that! Don't pull your cuteness with me. This is a serious matter," said hat man.
"Don't worry sibs, I can get us out of this. Remember. I'm the king of Anvilania," replied Yakko.
The three warner siblings backed up. Yakko cried, "Release the anvils!"
830 anvils fell from the sky and crushed the people. (Don't worry they're okay. Aren't they always?) All except for the 40 newcomers who had joined the line.
"This calls for drastic measures!" cried Yakko, as Wakko pulled out a measuring tape.
"Wakko! Your weapon please!" cried Dot.
"Which one?" belched Wakko, pulling out his Wakky sack. "Ah! I know!" He ran off into the background and what came back was a huge truck with a mallet the size of niagra falls tied to it. He climbed down and cut the rope, causing the mallet to fall on the 40 some people.
Wakko trotted up to the anvil on top of the hat man, and lifted it up. The hat man looked scared and surrendered the cap. Wakko put it on and marched into Ainalivna followed by Yakko and Dot. People threw Twinkies out into the streets, while Wakko ran about eating them. He had no crown, just his red cap, which he liked better anyway.

The next day, it was time for Wakko to meet his people. When he walked out to address them, there was a great exclamation of, "HE'S NOT WEARING ANY PANTS!" and there was much rejoicing.

Wakko said, "I have an idea."
And there was much rejoicing.
"'Ey. Does anybody know what 'Ainalivna' means?"
The crowd all mumbled among themselves, and shook their heads.
"How's about we rename this place, umm, Malletania?"
And there was much rejoicing.
"Faboo. Does anybody want some Twinkies?"
And there was much rejoicing.

Yakko turned to the camera. "Would someone please stop this writer from saying 'and there was much rejoicing?'" And a mallet appeared over her head, and she was thwonked.

"I'm hungry," said Wakko.
"Hey, wait a second. They said only the ruler can hand out twinkies. We still haven't found a ruler," said Yakko.
"I've got one," said Wakko, and out of his wakky sack he pulled a ruler. "Is centimeters okay?"

But suddenly there was trouble in Malletania. The neighboring kingdom was buried up to their knees in chilli, and they threatened to take over Malletania if something was not done.
They were Anarchists, and with their freedom, they decided it would do no harm to move. So one by one they started trudging thru the chilli until they came to the Malletanian kingdom.
"It's the Anarchists! They've come to move in due to the chilli!" cried a messenger.
Wakko leaped into one of their arms. "Hey, Mr An R Kissed, how come your names An, but you're a mister?? Huh ? Huh? Huh?"
"If it's so cold outside why do they move? Why can't they hide in their castle? Chilli weather isn't going to stop 2 miles away y'know," said Dot.
"That, sibs, is something I can't explain either," replied Yakko.
"By the way, you're not kissed," said Wakko. He paused and gave the man a smooch. "Now y'are!"
The messenger sniffed and glared snottily at Wakko. "Will you help us, or will you not?"
"Oh, the chili? I can help you out with that," Wakko agreed.
"Really? We are in great debt to you if you can. Our most humble and grateful thanks to you."
Wakko traveled to the land of the Anarchists and took a deep breath, opened his mouth wide, and ran through the streets, devouring the chili as he went. After about forty seconds, he arrived back in Malletania to inform the messenger that all was well. The messenger went back, and all was indeed well.

Suddenly Wakko looked strange. "HE'S GONNA BLOW!" yelled Yakko. "JUMP FOR COVER!" Suddenly, it happened...BEEEEEEEEEEEEEELCH. "Uh, how y'feel, Wakko?" ventured Yakko, poking his head up from behind a mallet. "I feel fine," Wakko said in a silly voice.

Wakko had enough belch in him, that in celebration, the great Wakkorotti burped Ode To Joy that evening for all the Anarchists, Malletanians, and Anvilanians.
And then the great Wakkorotti had to go to the potty, but there was none to be found. "Potty emergency!" he cried.
He ran all about the land looking for a place to potty, all the while muttering, "potty potty potty." He FINALLY discovered a potty in his castle...but it was moldy.
"I CAN'T POTTY IN THERE!" he yelled. "IT'S DISGUSTING!"
"Wait. This is a cartoon. Mister Artist Man, please, could you put a potty in this drawing for us? Pleeeeease?" pleaded Dot, looking as cute as possible. A potty was painted in. "Thank you!" chorused the Warners, and Yakko and Dot dashed out of the scene.

All the Warners had decided to spend five days in Malletania to celebrate Wakko's kingship (Yakko had left the Prime Minister in charge of Anvilania). But one day, Dot glanced in a mirror, and screamed, "AAAAAAAAHHHH!"
Yakko and Wakko looked up. "Whassamatter, Dot?"
"My barrette is missing!"
"The yellow flower?"
"Yes!"
Just then, a messenger knocked on the door. "Froinlaven," said Wakko, and the door disappeared. The messenger entered, and said, "A flowered barrette has been discovered in Cuteania. Whoever it looks the cutest on shall be the next queen of Cuteania."

The Warners groaned. "Not AGAAAAAAAAIN..."