Dan Rather Election 2000 quotes

"If you think the election's over, don't you go there!"

"The rest of us could be out here in the desert for a good while." -On Americans awaiting Presidential election results.

"It's way past the witching hour at this point in the game."

"Close only counts with hand grenades and horseshoes."

"This much tension can't be cut with a saw. It requires a blowtorch!"

"Well, the word 'goofy' comes to mind. It may be a tad strong, but I'm not sure."

"If a frog had sidepockets, he'd carry a handgun."

"The race is tight, like a too-small two piece bathing-suit."

"Both parties have champagne on ice, but that champagne might get so cold that you'd have to get a pick ax to open it up because its so frozen up."

"This thing is tighter than the rusted lugnuts on a '55 Ford."

"Round and round it goes, exactly who and where the vote comes from, nobody knows."

"Bush was at the 5-yard line. Now he moves back to about the 3-yard line."

"They've put up, now they can shut up, because they've won." -Speaking of the to-be-determined presidential winner.

"Gore winning without California would be like trying to scratch his ear with his elbow."

"They're like a smiling cat in a creamery." -Comment of state of Tennessee residents after Bush took Tennessee

"This race is crackling like a hickory fire."

"He must be madder than a rained-on rooster." -On Bush after the first Florida electoral votes went to Gore.

"His lead is melting faster than ice cream in a microwave."

"No one's calling this race, oh boy. Not even me!"

"Let's face it, Al Gore has his back to the wall, his shirt tails on fire and his bill collectors at the door."

"That's how tight it is: It's spandex tight!"

"He spent money like he had shorted Microsoft." (On Jon Corzine spending $80 million to win his New Jersey Senate race.)

"They'll be doing back flips in Nashville." (On Gore winning Pennsylvania.)

"These returns are running like a squirrel in a cage."

"It was as hot and squalid as a New York elevator in August." (On the New York Senate race.)

"Bush has run through Dixie like a big wheel through a cotton field."

"It would be Shakespearean for Al Gore to lose because of his home state."

"This will have the people in Austin standing up like they got stuck with hat pins." (On the recantation of Florida results.)

"If he doesn't carry Florida, Slim will have left town." (On Gore's chances.)

"Hotter than a Laredo parking lot." (On the race)

"I think you would likelier see a hippopotamus run through this room than see George Bush appoint Ralph Nader to the Cabinet."

"This race is as tight as a too-small bathing suit on a too-hot car ride back from the beach."

"If a frog had side pockets, he'd carry a handgun." (In response to somebody telling him that if someone won one state ...)

"We've lived by the crystal ball, we're eating so much broken glass. We're in critical condition."