Title: Renovation

Summary: Xander visits Angel and Cordelia. Comes after "Reversal," "The Morning After," "Departure Point," and "Weekly Ritual." I think I need a name for this series. Suggestions, anyone?

Spoilers: Let's just say everything.

Disclaimer: Of *course* they belong to someone else. I could never some up with characters like this. Specifically, they belong to Mutant Enemy, Fox, WB, and anyone else I forgot.

Rating: Let's say PG. Maybe PG-13. I'm guessing. I'm not good at this rating thing.

Distribution: Please ask. I'm not too sure anyone would really want it, though.

Feedback: Um, sure, I think. I'm not really a writer. I'm just trying to sort out what the voices in my head want me to do. There are just so *many* of them, telling me all sorts of different things, and I'm not sure which ones to listen to. Feedback would probably help. So would therapy, but I can't afford that right now, so I'll just try to keep on writing. The big question is this: Does anyone want to see any more of this?

Notes: Yeah, I read the _Entertainment Weekly_ article (by the way, what weedwhacker did our favorite vampire piss off? That's the same hairstyle I wake up with if I use the wrong conditioner). I'm aware that Angel will be working with Doyle, portrayed by Glenn Quinn, not Whistler. But I really, really like Max Perlich (I'm seriously considering renting a *Paulie Shore* movie because he's in it), so I'm sticking with Whistler. And shoot me now. I had to give him a sort of sidekick, too. He reminds me of the kind of guy who would have this sort of thing going on.

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He gawked at the room. It was all he *could* do. Lots of velvet. Purples, greens, and blues. It was like he was in an underwater version of Jeannie's bottle. Cordelia noticed his stare. "Vinnie did this room. She has a thing for blue velvet."

"Vinnie? She?"

"Yeah. She's Whistler's girlie. Well, really, more like he's her boy. He didn't listen to her when Angel went to Sunnydale, and she doesn't let him forget it. Apparently, she told Whistler that Buffy was dangerous to Angel before she was even activated, but Whistler just brushed Vinnie off. Now whatever she says goes." Cordelia grinned. "And she has these psychotic cats. One of them -- Ash, after the _Evil Dead_ movies -- thinks he's a cross between a parrot, a monkey, and a dog." As if on cue, a brown tabby made her way from behind the sofa. "And this is the other one. Her name's Nancy, like in _A Nightmare on Elm Street_. She's just a skittish neurotic kitty. Friendly, but nervous."

"Um, okay. What's with the 'Vinnie' thing? Her real name?"

"Oh, no. Her real name isn't even pronounceable. She's a demon, too. She has a thing for --"

"Let me guess. Vincent Price."

"Nope. Van Gogh. And Frank Zappa. His middle name was Vincent. But good guess."

"So I'm staying at a house decorated by a demon into velvet who named her cats after horror movie heroes and picked a name inspired by a depressed artist and an anti-authoritarian composer?"

Cordelia just shrugged. "Well, everyone has issues."

The subject of their conversation chose that moment to bounce down the circular staircase into view. Dressed completely in black except for purple suede platform shoes, lavender-lensed military-issue glasses, silver nails, and matching purplish-burgundy lipstick and cropped hair, with a black cat perched like a parrot on her shoulder, her appearance made Xander thankful she was on the side of good. Yep, someone has issues. "You forgot the dog named Rufus after George Carlin in _Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure_." Bending over to shrug the cat off onto the couch, she held out a hand for Xander. "Hi. You must be Xander." Speechless, Xander could only nod in response. "We're pretty much booked for rooms right now. Renovations. You're going to have to share with Cordelia." Well, Cordy did say that Vinnie ran the show. And, after all, he was supposed to be here to visit his ex-girlfriend.

After Xander and Cordelia picked up his luggage and headed for her room, a voice came from the stairs. "Renovations? I thought you were done redecorating. What are you doing now, Vinnie?"

She sighed, adopting her favorite 'look, I'm right, and you know it' tone. "Whistler, those two have some things to discuss, and they're not going to do it if he's staying in another room." Grinning, she added, "Just think of it as a lifestyle renovation. And it's more Cordy's project than mine."

~~~~

"Can they hear us?"

Cordelia shook her head. "Vinnie soundproofed every room. Whistler made her do it when Angel moved in. Back when the guys met up and Whistler dragged Angel out here, right before Buffy became the Slayer. I guess Angel didn't appreciate having an insomniac music-loving demon for a roommate. I made the mistake of leaving my door open one day. Let me tell you, there's nothing like being blasted awake in the middle of the afternoon because someone decided she would go insane if she didn't hear 'Debaser' at full volume right that very moment."

"Oh." Xander considered her response.

Silence is rarely a good thing when standing in a room as full of tension as Cordelia's at that moment. "What's wrong, Xander? You haven't been yourself since you got here." She knew why, but she had to hear him say it.

He sat on the edge of the bed, avoiding her eyes and her question. "So we could have loud wake-the-dead sex and no one would hear?"

"We could, but we won't. It's wrong, Xander. You don't care about me that way." Oh, great, remind him about Faith. She recognized the look that response caused. She had put it on his face many times after discovering him in Willow's arms. This time around, though, she understood what people meant when they said something was hurting them more than it hurt her. She folded her arms around him in an attempt to ease the blow of her words. "I would rather burn my eyebrows off than cause you any more pain. And I know you. After all you've done for me, I know it would not be good."

Smiling wistfully, he looked her in the face. "Are you happy, Cordy? I mean *really* happy? For three states, all I could think about was how selfish I was when I asked Angel to change you. What if this wasn't what you wanted and I just chose for you because it would make *me* feel better?"

"Yeah, I am. This isn't what I would have chosen, but I'm finding out that what the Rolling Stones were right." Laughing at his confusion, she explained, "You can't always get what you want, but, sometimes, you get what you need. I never knew it before, but I was always a deeply unhappy person. Except when we were dating. No, not that face again." Sadness had claimed his features. Raising her hand, she stroked his face, trying to erase the pain. "Come on, Xander, if things hadn't happened the way they did, we wouldn't be here today. And I would have never dreamed of even considering this life, but it turned out to be what I needed. I finally feel at peace. Thank you." She caught the tear falling out of the corner of his eye. "Now that we're clear on the fact that my life is finally okay, we can concentrate on you."

"What do you mean?"

This was getting really old really quickly. "Well, gee, let's see. You don't call or write all summer. Yeah, I know you didn't have our phone number or address when you left, but you could have gotten them from Willow. I know you called her and wrote to her. Then out of the blue, Willow calls and says that you announced you're going to come visit me. You didn't ask. Not that there's anything wrong with that," she added quickly, "but it was a surprise. And you haven't mentioned Angel even once, even to insult him. Very odd since this is more his place than mine. What went on between the two of you after the Ascension, after he left me at the mansion with Giles? And don't tell me that nothing happened. Your face looks just like Angel's when I try to get any information from him." At Angel's name, his expression changed to wistful. "Okay, I'm going to tell you something, but you have to swear you won't tell him I told you." He nodded, the confusion returning. "He misses you. He mopes around all the time. Even when he's supposedly all wrapped up in a case, you can tell he's not really thinking about work. And you are the only person he doesn't mention. I mean, he even talks about *Oz*, but not you." Now a sad expression again. "Oh, *please*. Don't tell me you don't avoid talking about him. Just look at how much you've gone on about him here in his house." She was getting tired of doing all of the talking. It was draining to be the only one discussing this stuff.

"You're right." Finally. Even though the voice was sad and small, it was still a voice other than her own. "Except for the time I worried about you, he's all I've been able to think about since I left. Let me tell you, it made for some depressing time behind the wheel." Something she said moments ago popped back into his head. "Wait, you're truly happy?" She nodded. "And you still have your soul?"

She tilted her head, considering her answer. "Yeah. According to Giles, Willow did a little creative spell-casting when she worked her magic on Angel and me. This soul thing is permanent." At the shocked look on his face, she continued. "And Angel has known since before Wesley showed up."

"What? I thought he left Sunnydale because he couldn't be with Buffy because of the soul thing."

"Nope. He was trying to forget someone else. I think he just told her that so she wouldn't stake him."

Xander sat in silence, considering her answer, considering his response. "So do you have any idea who the someone else is?" Attempted nonchalance. Failure.

Finally, her patience reached its breaking point. "Xander, have you been ignoring everything I've said? Did I not already say who it is? " One more bombshell. If he doesn't pick up on that, she'd just ship his ass back to Sunnydale. After making him spend the weekend with Vinnie. Maybe that's not such a bad idea regardless of whether he figured it out or not. "Anyway, you need to sort things out by talking them out with someone other than Willow. She's sick of being the go-between for the two of you. The sworn-to-secrecy thing got really old really quickly. Every week, both of you calling her, grilling her about the other, but then begging her not to say anything? I'm amazed she didn't get caller ID and block your calls."

Oh, yeah. That worked. "Angel talked to her? Willow knows?" Cordelia nodded. "Oh. Wow. I guess that explains this." He reached into his jacket and pulled out a small package -- a scrap of silk tied in a sort of bag shape with a ribbon. "She sent this overnight with the last batch of cds after I told her I wanted to visit you guys." He opened it to reveal a number of small plastic packets and a note written by Willow. The note read simply, "When the time arrives, you will know." Confused, she picked up one of the packets and squinted at the lettering.

And promptly dropped it on the bed. Staring at him, she asked incredulously, "*Willow* sent these?" He nodded. "Oh, my. Our little girl is growing up." Picking the packet up again, she read out loud, "'Warms up with friction or breath.' Oh, Xander."

"And it's cinnamon flavored. "

Rolling her eyes, she groaned, "I *so* did not need to hear that."

~~~~ the end ~~~~