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Chapter 1: Women Don't Make Sense
I'm going to
start off this whole shebang by giving you my take on
women in general.
I know, I know. Every woman is a unique creature. But women
have more commonalties than they have differences. So let's start
with what I think they have in common, then we'll move on to
differences (the ideas that I'm about to share with you here are from
my own research, testing in the real world and analysis).
For most men, a woman is like a Chinese puzzle inside of a brain
twister.
Much of their behavior makes no sense at all (to men).
If there's one thing that I'm clear about, it's that most women
THINK differently than most men and most women want different
things than most men.
This is hard for many men to grasp or understand, but it's true.
And the sooner you get a handle on what's going on here, the sooner
you'll be more successful with women.
Let's start by comparing what men and women are interested in.
Have you ever stopped to think about what entertains women as a
group compared to what entertains men as a group? Women buy
Cosmopolitan magazine, watch soap operas, and read romance novels.
Men buy Playboy, watch sports, and read the paper.
Hey, wait a minute here! What's in those Cosmos, soaps, and
romance novels? And why are women so attracted to them?
And why is it that when men try to watch a soap opera or read a
romance novel all they can say is "I don't get it..."?
I'll tell you why. It's because women's brains are wired differently
from men's brains. That's why.
And by telling you about what attracts women's attention, I've also
given you a clue about how to attract them to YOU.
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Where Our Desires Come From
After spending
the last ten years or so studying psychology and
behavior, I've come to the opinion that MOST of our desires, drives,
preferences, strengths, weaknesses, behaviors and personality traits
are determined by our DNA and some by our social conditioning. I'm
talking about both men and women here.
Even differences like whether a person prefers adventure or couch
riding are largely a matter of programming from birth (If you really
don't want to agree with me on this one, read some books on the
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator or try the book Who Am I?)
In any event, HOWEVER they got to be interested in these common
things, most women have a few main interests, needs, desires, or
whatever you want to call them when it comes to men, relationships,
and romance.
Have you ever read the personals? Have you ever noticed how
many women say things like "princess looking for prince", "friends
first" and "looking for my soul-mate"? Have you ever noticed how
almost NO men ever say these things?
What's going on?
Have you ever listened to a group of women talking about men?
Ever notice how they speak largely in some kind of code language and
constantly make a big deal out of tiny details that seem totally
irrelevant?
Have you ever noticed, on the other hand, how men are direct with
each other and have no interest in bickering over small things?
What's going on?
Have you ever noticed how attracted to drama most women are?
Here's my take on this whole subject: Women are playing out a
role that hasn't changed for thousands (millions?) of years. These days
the language and clothing are different. But it's the same that it's
always been.
There are different parts of human brains that create drives and
desires for different things. Often, these drives conflict with each
other.
For instance, a
woman might want a strong man in her life, but she
might also want a feeling of independence. She might want to have
attention, but she might also want to be seen as above needing
attention. (Men have these types of conflicts as well, only in different
areas)
So, for example, I hear a lot of men saying things like "I hate all
the drama that women create. Why do they create this stuff?"
My answer: Drama accomplishes a lot of things at once. It gets
attention, it sends emotions through the body (emotions are highly
addictive chemicals), it's a way to be self righteous, it's often fun, it's
interesting and prevents boredom, it gives things meaning... and on
and on. There are a lot of good reasons for drama. But most men can't
understand them because drama fulfills needs that MOST MEN DON'T
HAVE.
It's like women saying "I hate it when all a guy can talk about is
sports." What needs to sports fulfill for men? Competition, adrenaline,
power, domination... all the typical guy stuff. Incidentally, stuff that
fulfills needs that most women just plain don't have.
Continue
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