Chapter 5: On Looks and Body Language

Most men that I talk to who want to learn how to be successful
with women ask me things like "What's a good line?" or "What do you
say when they say this?"
For some reason, most people forget that language is a
SECONDARY way of communicating. It's to be used when there's no
faster way.
When two people are communicating in person, most of the
communication is happening through body language and voice tone,
and very little through the actual words.
I've seen studies that show that as little as 7% of your
communication is the words, and the other 93% is your body language
and voice tone.
So which do you think is more powerful when dealing with women?
Right, right... the body language and voice tone.

Body Language Basics

Many people agree that women are far more sensitive to body
language than men are.
I have to say, in my experience, women can detect all kinds of
things from body language. Ask a female friend to describe what's
going on with a person by looking at them, and you'll be surprised at
all the information they'll give you.
So it follows that if women are so in tune with body language, you
might as well get some of the basics together so you're transmitting
the right message.
My opinion is that women prefer men that are confident, bordering
on arrogant.
Most women will tell you that arrogant men turn them off, but I've
found that if you mix humor with a little arrogance, it's a killer.
So how do you use your body to telegraph confidence?
Well, first of all you walk upright, hold your head up, and hold your
shoulders back.

Next, you SLOW DOWN your movements, and make slower,
calculated gestures.
Then, you make eye contact and keep it when you see women. You
don't look away until they do, and you kind of squint and raise an
eyebrow.
I've done a lot of work in this area, and I've found that by
SLOWING DOWN, I create mystery and intrigue. I literally practice
slowing down my walk, my gestures, how fast I turn my head, how
fast I talk, even how fast I blink.
Also, start taking up more space and opening up your physiology.
If you're seated, keep your legs and arms uncrossed. Keep your legs
far apart and your shoulders back. Don't lean forward, lean back.
This might sound a little far out to some people, but these LITTLE
details make all the difference when dealing with a woman.
It's amazing how fast most women can detect insecurity, neediness
and low self-esteem.
I personally believe that when a man is self-confidant (or, more
specifically, a woman BELIEVES that a man is self-confident) this is
attractive to women on an UNCONSCIOUS level. What I mean is that I
think this activates a part of a woman's brain that can't help but feel
an attraction.
If you'd like a model of confidence, watch some James Bond
movies. You'll notice that James almost never smiles, and I can't
remember a time that I've ever seen him laugh.
But James is the sex symbol of masculine adventure.
Does he do the things that I mentioned above? Of course. That's
where I learned a lot of them. Ha!
Another way to demonstrate and project confidence is to PAUSE
while you're talking. Pausing on purpose creates suspense and tension.
It's great. If you combine pauses with serious looks, you will create
an air of power and confidence.
For example, you might say "Well, if I were you, I'd just tell her
what you think" like so... "Well... (pause) if I were you... (pause and
look into eyes with serious look) I'd just tell her what you think."
This creates what's known as a 'subtext' to the communication. On
the surface you're talking about the normal conversation. But
underneath, you're communicating suspense, confidence, and
mystery.
If you learn how to mix a seductive voice tone and body language
with regular conversation, you'll find that you can get women turned
on talking about random things like the weather.
Pause often. It will do your communication style good.