What's It All About?

When you're 75 years old, what will give you pleasure?

My pleasure will probably come only from remembering. Thirty years from now, this is how it will happen.

There I am, dozing in my wheel chair. Somebody nudges me awake. I open my eyes and see giant tits straining the zippered front of a white uniform. I look up into the smiling black face of Mandy, the 20 year old attendant. She grins a toothy smile, "Time fo' sum sunshin', Donny." I nod politely, then drop my eyes to her large bosom and stare. Something's familiar. I struggle to remember.

She pushes me down the hall toward the veranda of the Golden Years Retirement Villa, pleasantly chattering away. As she talks, her dialect triggers my fogged up memory. Gradually old images, smells, feelings, sounds, sensations percolate up, flood my consciousness. I grin, start slobbering. In my mind, there I am again with my only black young lover, Genette. It's not 2016 any longer, it's 1979.

I have her bra off but I can't get these tight jeans down over her wonderfully big, 22 year old hips. To tease me she puts on her best jive talk, "Sheeit! Yo' white boys don' kno' nuffin 'bout no black ass," grabs the waist and peels them off, giggling the whole time.

I'm eating her. She takes my fingers off her nipples, and without a word, shows me I'm supposed to smash those giant tits against her chest, rub them 'round and 'round. She comes hard. Seconds later she comes harder. I get on and get us off, "bof us."

Thirty years from now what will you remember?

WHO'S READING THIS BOOK?

When Hugh Hefner first asked Barbi Benton out she said, "Well, I've, uh, never dated anyone over 23 before." Hef responded without hesitation, "That's okay. Neither have I."

You don't have Hefner's resources or knowledge. (Understated, right?) You're 40 plus or minus a few, divorced or about to be. You don't want to buy a young woman with gifts.

Some of you are experiencing the roller coaster emotions immediately following divorce or are acting out Middle Age Crazy. If that's you, these conditions have to be dealt with and resolved before attempting to practice what I preach. While getting it together, or at least into a pile, prepare yourself. Believe me, there's plenty to do and learn.

If you insist on going after young women before you're done with the emotional aftermath of a marriage ending, you'll set yourself back a year, that's if you have a giant ego and the skin of a rhino. Otherwise you'll get so humiliated you'll be happy to keep dating that 38 year old divorcee with three kids.

Finally, you're interested in, no, that's way too weak. You're lusting after young females. Trouble is, you don't have the slightest idea how to meet, talk with and date them.

WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO LEARN

Seen many men dating girls 18 to 24 years old? That's not because the men don't want to, now is it? Could it be ten million of them read the book quoted below? The poor saps think all they have to do is walk up and spew one of the author's "100 Best Opening Lines."

The first, and really the only thing it takes to pick up girls, is to talk to them. Basically that's it. You find a chick who turns you on, you stroll right up to her, and you say, 'That dimple on your left knee is absolutely sensational!' . . . That's all there is to it. If you can do that, you can really pick up girls. By the truckloads! ERIC WEBER, How To Pick Up Girls: Featuring Interviews With 25 Beautiful Girls.

Do you suppose Weber really believes the only thing it takes "is to talk to them?" Maybe the 25 beautiful girls he interviewed were in his wet dreams? The "dimple" line and his others might work if a Harrison Ford look-alike "strolled right up" and tried it. That's assuming the "chick" could keep from laughing hysterically, an assumption very few men with three-digit IQ's would make.

This is not a book of interviews with young women and a writer's disguised guess as to what it all means. This is a how-to book by a 46 year old man who has done it for the past ten years and continues to do it.

I explain how to make your fantasies come true but right now that's exactly what they are, fantasies. You are going to learn how white, or raised white, middle class young women think, what's important to them and what they want from a man. You'll know what you have to be and look like to attract her. I explain where to find her, how to meet her, what to say to her, principles of courting when you're 20 years older than she is, what her real motives are for dating you, how to behave on dates and how to seduce her. I tell you the must do's as well as the no no's.

You're going to know what she has to offer and what you absolutely cannot expect from her. You will end up knowing what it really takes for a fortyish man to date a twentyish woman. My experiences are here for you to learn from, good ones, funny ones and horror stories. When done reading you'll avoid many of the mistakes I made as you learn the complex, delicate rituals and courtship practices insisted upon by a young woman interested in an older man.

But you have to learn by doing. If you want to break, then ride a horse, a wild young mare, you can't read a book then sit on the corral fence theorizing about it. You have to climb on and get thrown, again and again. Eventually you'll realize you must talk gently to her, letting her know you intend no harm, showing no fear while radiating, "I'm in charge here." When you can do that she'll let you mount her and won't buck you off.

There are 13 million young women out there. At this very moment a half a million of them are being courted by men twice their age. Tens of thousands are having affairs with an older man right now, loving every minute. So how do you get involved?

You already date women, right? No matter how old she is the steps are the same: find-meet-talk-date. What's the problem then, you ask?

THE PROBLEM. Clearly stated, you don't know how to: (1) find her (2) meet her and (3) talk with her. Dating follows naturally if you converse with her correctly, based on the rules of engagement as she understands them. Presently you solve this three-part problem several times each year, the only difference is the female's age.