What has been the most exciting/fun aspect of your spouse's training this far?
Being alone so much in a new city, struggling to find ways to keep my spirits up

His temperament when he is sleep-deprived and stressed out from crazy schedules, and the way I end up shaping my life around his schedule, which sometimes means losing some of my own supports.

spending time alone

absence and emotional distance


The isolation from my family, home, and community. The single parenting. His needs coming first.

moving

His inability to understand my difficulty with picking up and moving around the country on a regular basis

The stress of watching him being so stressed and how it negatively affects our family by causing tension. Half the time you are on pinds and needles trying not to upset him further or trying not to do anything that would hinder his study time.

The stress induced by rude and abusive staff docs who are supposed to be teachers. The constant sense that you are being evaluated wears on residents. And the fear that they are making mistakes.

Money - or lack thereof! Hand in hand with that is affording babysitters to watch the kids so we can go out together on occasion.
hearing about successful operations, happy patients, sweet new babies delivered

Sharing in his successes and moments of discovery, both of himself and the medical world.

nothing

are you kidding?

Seeing how far that we have come as a couple when we have started with so little. We have definitely climbed a few mountains.

getting to see him expand his horizons as a 'real' doctor.

Getting to see his excitement with the things he is experiencing

I think it is watching him learn so many things and knowing that he is fulfilling his dream of becoming a doctor. I also like our home in a new state and all the friends we have made.

Moving to a big city nearer to my family and friends was wonderful for me, career wise and socially. I have to say that those five years saw me flourish while my husband suffered during training.

Seeing him meet the very high goals he sets for himself. I am excited for him and his possibilities - he's got quite a bit of potential!
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What has been the most difficult aspect of your spouse's training this far?
His enormous workload- he is always gone and when he is home he is exhausted.

Taking care of the kids by myself. Feeling VERY lonely.

Giving of yourself tirelessly to your spouse and children without getting much affirmation in return.

Stress from demands at work, including extra projects he undertakes. No vacation.

Keeping my job responsibilities

moving, and money issues

The hours away from home and the amount of energy it takes for him to be successful at his job.

Him not being physically available to spend time. It is very hard for me and don't know if I can do it.

His ability to fall asleep at any instance.

Dealing with his "female exam" training, etc
The hours and cost
of a medical education

exhaustion and sleep deprivation

no time

sleep


studying non stop

I am really miffed that the NRMP is going to determine where I move, and when, and that my career has to adjust to their schedule and decision. Although I can contribute to the way that my husband ranks the programs, after that it's all in their hands -- and I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THIS! As a successful career woman not at all accustomed to compromising, this is extremely frustrating!

Making time for each other. Remaining patient and supportive. Trying not to pass off my frustrations on her for our lack of time together.