VIII-Mission Impossible?

“Let’s get this party started!” Barret roared, letting the gunfire start.  The Shinra guards were obviously unprepared; they ran for the nearest exit like frightened children.  Barret mowed them down before they got there.

“Nice shooting,” Cloud complimented, then moved to a small, shining square on the ground. 

“I don’t believe it, but we will begin our mission with relative ease.  This is the first keycard.”

“That was…cinchy!” Tifa was a bit surprised.

“Well, let’s USE the damn thing!” Barret barked.  Cloud nodded and went to an elevator.  Once everyone was inside, he swiped the keycard and the elevator moved up a floor.  The team emerged into a large lobby full of Shinra employees.  Not a weapon was in sight.

“Behave,” Cloud ordered.  Barret nodded and stayed hidden in shadows.  Cloud and Tifa went out to scout the area.  Since neither of them had a big gun attached to his arm, they wouldn’t alarm anyone.  Though the sight of Cloud’s sword might do the trick.

Cloud looked around the room.  From what he could tell, these were the commoners of Shinra.  None appeared threatening, and they were chattering like working people did.

“Hey!” a new voice broke in, “You two!  Can I help you?”  Cloud turned around to face a small man in a brown suit coat.

“Yes,” Tifa spoke, a little too quickly, “Do you know where we can find someone named Aeris?”  And horribly obvious was she.

“Aeris…?” the man frowned.  “Oh, yeah, Aeris!  She’s down a few floors, doing good for her first week.”

“Excuse me…?” Cloud broke in.

“She’s a secretary, started a week ago.  Oh, I see, we’re talking about two different people!”  Cloud’s spirits sunk.  “Hey…are you the elevator guys?”

“Yeah,” Tifa nodded quickly, “How did ya know?”

“You have the look,” he replied, irritating Cloud.  “Here’s the keycard to the next level.  Make sure it’s fixed up by morning, all right?”

“Yeah…” Cloud took the keycard like a birthday present and went back to Barret.

“That easy, man?” the big man asked.

“Yep.  Now come on.”




The 62nd floor was every bit as unthreatening as the last floor.  Cloud and company found themselves in a large room with a maze of locked doors leading to an elevator on the other side. 

“Well, Mr. Leader,” Barret smirked, “Got any ideas?”

“I thought you were the leader,” Cloud protested.

“Of AVALANCHE,” Barret corrected, “Not the ‘Save the Flower Girl’ campaign.  But don’t get me wrong.  I want her alive and well as much as you do.  I owe that gal a lot.”

“We all do,” Tifa agreed, and surveyed the area.  “Cloud, look.  There’s a series of vents that line the ceiling.”  She kicked a grate on the wall.  “We can get in this way.”

“Not more vents…” Barret complained.

“You wanted to save the flower girl?” Cloud challenged.

“After you, Mr. Leader!”

“I’ll go first,” Tifa shut them up, ruining the metal grate with a single kick.  She hoisted herself up and started crawling.  Cloud followed swiftly, but Barret of course had trouble.

“Shit, man, I really hate this…” Barret muttered, squeezing through.  His predicament proved amusing to his comrades.  “Somethin’ funny?”

“No, no…” Cloud replied, stifling another snicker.

“Boys, boys, behave,” Tifa shook her head.  “We’re at the end!  Jump down!”

It was fun falling through the ceiling.  Cloud, Tifa, and Barret found themselves staring right at the staircase to the next level.

“No keycard?” Barret questioned as he opened the door at the top effortlessly.

“No complaining…” Cloud muttered, pushing through.

The next floor was a recreation center.  Yeah, a recreation center.  Didn’t you hear me?  It was a Shinra recreation center where people with no lives worked out/slept so they could be near work when they had to report for their 23-hour workdays.

“Hey hey!” a clerk called to them, “You guys look spent!  Come on over and have a soda!”

“Uh, no thanks…” Cloud replied.

“Hey, all right.  Why ya here?”

“Well,” Barret said slyly, “We got an audience with a big shot.”

“Really?” the clerk was shocked, “Well how bout that!  We got Prez Shinra at the top, a meeting room two floors below, and Mayor Domino’s right up stairs!  Go on up, there ain’t no keycard needed.”

Hell yes! Cloud smirked and followed the man’s advice.  He was thoroughly disappointed with the Shinra Company’s security.

The next floor was a library.  Upon further examination, AVALANCHE determined it to be an archive of Midgar and the Shin-Ra Company itself.

“A whole wealth of knowledge…” Tifa breathed.

“And none we give a damn about!” Barret chimed in, feigning happiness.

“So many different sections,” Cloud muttered, “Let’s have a look around.  May as well browse.”

“Maybe we’ll find something useful?” Tifa said hopefully.

They accessed all kinds of files regarding the Shinra.  The Urban Development department had files such as “Midgar Sector 4, History” and “Midgar Budget Allowances”, but nothing useful.  Public Safety had stuff like “Turks Program” and “Law Enforcement Record”.  Barret scoffed at that one.  Weapons Development gave way to “SOLDIER” and “Weapon”, whatever that was.  Air and Space was pretty much useless, carrying files on the Rocket Town Space Program.  Science and Technology gave way to more “Weapon” Material and

“The Jenova Project”.  A chill went down Cloud’s spine.

“Dude…you all right?” Barret asked.

“I’m fine,” Cloud assured them.  He reached out for the file on the Jenova Project like it was some holy article.  He placed it carefully in the pouch that he kept all his potions and unused Materia in.  He would have to read it.  It would answer so much.

“Hey!” a gruff voice broke in.

AVALANCHE spun around, nervous as hell. A small man equipped with a submachine gun was there, eying them coldly. 

“A man downstairs says someone wants an audience with the Mayor of Midgar.  That you?”

No.  “Yes,” Cloud lied.

“Come with me,” he said, “No, on second thought, you first.  I’ll tell you where to go from behind.”



“Hart?  The hell are these people?”

Hart, the small, gruff man, tuned to let the rebels face Mayor Domino.

“Holy hell!  AVALANCHE!” Domino could not be fooled.  The tall, well-dressed man leaned
back in shock.

“Hands up and on your heads!” Hart shouted, raising his weapon to fire.

“Like hell!” Barret turned to counter.

“Stop!” Domino boomed.  “Stop, Hart!  I need these people.  Alive.”

“What…?” Hart was confused.

“We won’t help the Shinra,” Cloud snapped, “We mean to destroy them entirely!”

“Good, very nice, a ha.” Domino nodded as if it didn’t concern him.

“Don’t you get it?” Barret roared, “Yo’ ass is screwed!”

“Why?” Domino protested, “I’m not of the Shinra.  I hate them as much as you do!”

“Lyin’ sack of political shit!” Barret spat.

“Hah!” Domino laughed, “Politics!  I’m supposed to be a mayor!  Some mayor.  All I do is sit here keeping track of records, archives!” Domino was genuinely mad now.  “That’s the work of a librarian!  I never get any input in Shinra’s decisions, no influence in policies, absolutely no control over Midgar, and I’m mocked by my ‘superiors’ for my views.” He spoke vehemently.  “Reeve and I were the only ones against the pillar assault, and we were almost ruined for it!”

“Reeve?” Tifa asked.

“Head of the Urban Development Department,” Barret clarified.  “Whuddya know?  Some Shinra execs have a heart.  I dunno.  Sounds slightly convenient.”

“I’ll prove it!” Domino raved, running to his desk.  He retrieved a keycard and ran to Cloud. 
“Take it!  Use the staircase on the other end of the floor!  Hart will take you.  Get up there and give those arrogant blockhead bastards something fun to chew on!”

“Yes sir!” Cloud stared at the card a bit before pocketing it.

“One more thing,” Hart stopped them.  He pulled out a blue, glowing orb.  “This is an
‘Elemental’ Materia.  Alone, it’s useless, but when paired with a Materia of a certain element, it does special things.”

“Like?” Tifa challenged.

“Like,” Hart clarified, “If you pair it with a Fire Materia in your weapon, your attacks will do a bit of fire based damage.  If you couple it with a Fire Materia in your armor, you become more resistant to fire based attacks.”

“I have no other Materia, so its useless to me,” Domino dropped it in Cloud’s hand.  “Make use if it, will ya?”

“Will do,” Barret nodded slowly, not wanting to trust the Shinra, but feeling he had to.

Hart led them from Domino’s office to the staircase. 

“You really are going to tackle the Shinra Kings, aintcha?”

Cloud nodded.

“They’re egomaniacs,” Hart said slowly, “They killed a lot of people with the pillar collapse.”  He fished out a blue stone of his own and gave it to Cloud.  “This is my own Materia.  An ‘All’ type.  Get those bastards.”

“Thanks,” Cloud nodded.

“Really,” Barret broke in, surprising them all, “Thanks.  You an’ yer boss man.  I didn’t wanna believe that there was any controversy with the pillar assault.  Makes it easier to do what has to be done.”

Hart nodded.  “We’re not angels.”

AVALANCHE started upstairs. 

“What do we do with the Materia…?” Tifa asked.

“I’ll couple the All with my Restore,” Cloud decided.

“What about the Elemental?” Barret asked.

“No use for it now,” Cloud shrugged.

“What about Lightning?” Barret asked again, “How bout electric attacks?”

“No,” Tifa shook her head, “Then I can’t blast everything in a room to bits.”

The next floor quickly became icky and bad.  They were looking around a large room with several small cubicles surrounding a large room in the center.  AVALANCHE moved to the room and beheld a glowing green model of Midgar.

“There are pieces missing,” Tifa noticed immediately.

True, they were.  The model was missing chunks that made up Sectors 4, 5, and 6.

“Model of Midgar,” Barret mused, “Made out of Mako energy sucked right out of the earth.”

“There are chests in the cubicles around this room,” Tifa noted.  “I’ll bet at least one will hold a keycard.”

“But they’re all locked!” Barret reminded her.

“It’s worth a shot,” Cloud decided.  “We’ll split up.  Find some chests and try to open them. And be careful…” A feeling of danger crept into Cloud’s blood.  “I don’t think we’re alone on this floor.”



Tifa ran down to the southern end of the chamber.  She had two cubicles to choose from, one right, one left.  She flipped a coin in her mind and went left.  Inside the cubicle, she found two steel chests.  A strange feeling found her as she moved to one of the chests.  She was being watched.  Tifa spun around, but nothing was there.  Odd.  She turned back to the chest and tried to pry it open, having no luck.  It was locked.  She went to the other one and with a mighty kick wrenched it open.  It wasn’t locked.  How…cool.

This time, the feeling was real.  She spun around just in time to see a column of razors fly past her, cutting slightly into her bare stomach.

“Argh!” she gasped, jumping back and sizing up her opponent.  It was certified Shinra, AKA, freakish.  Tifa beheld a lengthy eel creature lined with blades.  It looked most like a floating saw.  “Damn!” she growled.  The eel returned the favor with a sinister hiss and sped towards Tifa again.  This time, she rolled to the side and lashed out with her foot, catching the creature in its broad side.  It hissed louder now, coiling like a snake and springing at Tifa.
She rolled away again, but felt the blades on the creature brush past her.  A close call.

Tifa leapt to her feet and began staring down the creature, lightning in mind.  Her Materia glowed a bright green, and a thin bolt of lightning crashed down upon the monster.  It flailed and hissed, totally uncoordinated.  Tifa ran up to it and scissor kicked its head, smashing it.  Ooze and brain goop splattered everywhere.  Tifa stifled a groan at the sight and looked inside the opened chest.  A glowing green piece of the Midgar puzzle lay inside.  The Shinra must not have gotten around to completing it, for some reason.  Tifa took the piece out and ran outside the cubicle.

“Barret!” she called out to him, spotting him across the room, “I got one!”

“Put it in!” Barret ordered, retreating into a cubicle to explore.

Tifa looked to the center room and almost started on her way, but the air around her suddenly turned chilling.  She heard the hisses first.  Two bladed eel creatures sped past her, one in front, the other behind her, all in a failed attempt to saw her in half.  Nevertheless, the bladed spines prickled across her back and stomach, teasing the slight wound that was already there.  Tifa inhaled sharply at the pain, then glared at the retreating eels.  They were coming around for another pass.  This time, she’d be ready.




Barret cursed at the locked chest and opened fire on it.  No dice.

“Damn, man…” he grumbled, “This shouldn’t be goin on!  I came here to blow away Shinra dudes, not play pirate, blowin up treasure chests and building a puzzle…”

His thoughts were rudely interrupted by a little whirring sound.  Barret turned to behold a floating blue orb that rode on air, spinning in mindless circles, but eying Barret with a single green eye.

“Hey there, lil’ fella…” Barret said nervously, raising his gun arm, “Got anything to tell me?”

The device whirred and sputtered a bit.

“Really?  Hey, come on now, R2D2, English!”

The blue thing didn’t take that kindly for some reason.  It gave off a hail of sparks and a bright glow.  Barret felt the area around him suddenly compress, pressing him into two-dimensions like a steamroller, then exploding back into proportion.  Barret collapsed, out of breath and shocked.  The blue orb dove at him, zapping him with little blue lasers that burned like a hot iron.  Barret let out a howl and scrambled across the floor on his knees, turning to fire when he reached the wall.  He cursed as the beams found his chest, causing none too little pain.  Barret lay there for a while; playing dead but secretly charging up a Fire spell.  He let it fly, incinerating the creature, which squealed and beeped in its own little language.  Barret pulled himself to the feet and leveled his gun-arm at the stunned little thing.  He fired.



Tifa burst into the room, shielding her eyes from the bright green glow of the Midgar model.  She had been trying to figure out what the Shinra had used this floor for.  Her best guess was that it was for the Urban Development Department to analyze Midgar via the model and make construction or repair decisions. 

She moved to the first hole in the puzzle.  Midgar was one big octagon, which meant that all Sectors had the exact same shape.  This particular sector could be any one.  She plugged the glowing green “Sector” into place.



Barret sat there, staring blankly at the wall.  Whatever the orb had done to him was showing.  His eyesight was blurry, he had a headache, and the area around him kept expanding before his eyes.  He was recovering, however, and actually snapped to attention when a click filled his eardrums.  It came from one of the chests.

The big man pulled himself sloppily to his feet and walked towards the chest.  He opened it.  For some reason, it had just decided to break open.  He hated it when metal used its imagination.  Inside, there was another piece to the glowing Midgar puzzle.
Barret shook his head to clear the remaining cobwebs and started for the central room.  He found Tifa resting in a corner.

“Ya dead?”

“No,” she shook her head, “But getting tired.”

“Don’t,” Barret popped in his piece of the model, “This party’s jes’ getting started!  Now if only Cloud would make some use of his white ass…”




He followed his ears to the cubicle where he’d heard the slight click.  Cloud kicked in the door and beheld as single chest.  He moved carefully for it, finding it unlocked.  Inside, he found his own piece of the giant puzzle in the middle of the chamber.

Pocketing the glowing Material, Cloud turned to leave.  Once outside, he heard a buzzing sound.  He turned to the left, and to his annoyance, a rather large steel beast was hovering towards him, propelled by a spinning razor blade for a base.

“Moth Slasher?” Cloud mumbled, listening to the information gathered by his Sense Materia.  “Damn, I don’t have time for this…”  But he’d have to make time.  The buzz saw with a torso flew at him, swiping with his base at the mercenary.  Cloud rolled to the side, but not before the blade sliced into his leg.  With a sharp cry, Cloud pressed his sword to his shin, Restore Materia glowing bright.  He had to at least stop the bleeding.  Shinra’s Moth Slasher didn’t waste much time.  It dove in for another attack, but Cloud met it with a wide, angry swipe.  The Machine’s makeshift head was severed from its body, clattering noisily to the floor.  But it wasn’t stopping.  It was making a beeline for Cloud’s location, the head’s last command still in effect throughout the body: saw that guy in half.  Cloud said a quick prayer and held the broadside of his sword out in front of him.  He took a breath and ran straight at the machine, meeting its charge.  The Moth Slasher crashed into the sword, losing all force yet still locked in an eternal struggle forward.  Cloud defied the laws of eternity and slashed clear through it, parting its body.



“Well here he comes to save the day!” Barret jeered with a smirk as soon as Cloud came into view.

“I do what I can,” Cloud offered.  He surveyed his team.  “Barret, you look drunk.  Tifa, you’re wounded.”

“Not really,” she waved it off, “Literally just a scratch.  Painful bastard, though.”

“We’ll live…I think,” Barret offered, “I got hit with some kind of magic.  Like, everything around me expanded and blew back into proportion.  It hurt.”

“Gravity,” Cloud muttered, “Be careful.  Gravity isn’t lethal, but it will disorient the hell out of you.”

“TELL me about it!” Barret swore, “Now let’s finish off this giant jigsaw!  I hope to god it was worth it!”

Cloud nodded and popped in his piece.  To their relief, a light click was heard in the background.

“South,” Tifa ordered.  They headed down to a previously locked chest and opened it.  Cloud pocketed the next keycard and smiled. 

“Shinra’s defense systems are finally showing, and they suck.”




“Holy hell, boy, this is bad…” Barret surveyed the floor.  This, if anything, was the actual Shinra Headquarters.  Computers were everywhere on the floor, and not just dinky laptops but huge mainframes that controlled all of Midgar’s power.  A large meeting room was in the center of the floor, and to top it off, there was a bathroom.  Plus, a helluva lotta people.

“These are suits,” Tifa noticed, “They’ll definitely freak out if they see us up here, unlike their hired men downstairs.”

“So we sneak,” Cloud ordered, “We’ve come too far to get caught now.”

“Let him round the corner,” Barret motioned to a guard rounding the corner.

The other two nodded and snuck down the hall.  No one in any rooms adjoining the hall noticed them.  They were too busy ruling the world.  Cloud peeked around the corner.

“He’s going around.”

“Keep going,” Barret nodded.

They snuck quietly around the corner, looking at the guard down the hall.  He was entering the bathroom.  How convenient. 

“Who are you?” the confused guard gasped as they ran into the washroom.  “The hell are you doing here?”

“Takin’ a leak,” Barret answered before blasting the guard.

“In here,” Tifa called, “In the stall!”

“No thanks, sister!” Barret chided.

“Pervert.  Get in here, there’s a vent.”

“Good,” Cloud nodded, “We can spy on the Shinra meeting room.  Something’s happening there.”

“How do you know?” Barret scratched his head, “I didn’t see nothing.”

“There were voices coming from the room,” Cloud responded, “I recognized Heidegger’s voice.  You really can’t miss it.”

“Come on,” Tifa urged, this vent leads right above them!  If we’re quiet, we can spy on them.”



The table took up the entire room.  It had been designed to seat the heads of Shin-Ra and all their apprentices, but lately, it was just used by the executives.  Now, the top five were sitting together, reviewing several things.

“Estimated damage to Sector 7 is reported to be in the range of five to seven billion gil,” Head of Urban Development, Reeve, stated.  “The estimated cost to rebuild Sector 7 is…”

“We’re not going to rebuild,” President Shinra interrupted.

“Wha…what?” Reeve was stunned, as were most of his comrades.

“You heard me,” Shinra repeated himself anyway, “We’re not going to rebuild Sector 7.  We’re moving on to bigger and better things.”

“Really now?” asked a confused Head of Public Safety, Heidegger, shifting his weight in his chair, “We openly displayed our intents to rebuild the homes down there.  Now I clearly could care less about that aspect, but the people down there will.  They’ll be downright pissed off!”

“He’s right,” agreed the head of Weapon Development, Scarlet, a tall woman in a sparkling crimson dress, her icy blue eyes piercing into Shinra, “Do you really want to risk another rebellion?”

Shinra was quiet.  He scanned the faces of those present.  “Reeve.  Up the Mako Production Rate of the reactors by 10%.”

“A rate hike?” Reeve was startled, “Sir, that will only further drive people away from Shinra!”

“They won’t flee,” President Shinra argued, “They’ll trust Shinra even more!”

“So what’s our grand plan?” Scarlet asked critically, leaning back in her chair and brushing a lock of golden hair out of her face.

“We’re going to revive the Neo Midgar project,” Shinra stated.

Heidegger stared at his boss as if he’d proposed they should all dance naked under a hail of flames.  “We trashed that project years ago for many reasons!”

“Yeah!” Reeve surprised himself by agreeing with Heidegger, “We didn’t have enough money to finance Neo Midgar, nor did we know where to make it!”

“The Promised Land,” Shinra reminded his associates.

“The Promised Land!  An old wives tale!” Scarlet scoffed.

“But there is a land with incredibly strong Mako concentrations,” Shinra pointed out, “And we finally have the means to discover it!”

“The Ancient…” Heidegger mused.

“The Ancients will lead the planet to a place of eternal happiness,” Shinra repeated the line as if it were holy.

“But,” a tired Reeve winced, “How?  How can we possibly get her to cooperate?”

“Never mind,” Shinra shook his head, “But it will happen.  Trust me.  We’ll find the Promised Land and build Neo Midgar there, and it will happen sooner than you think!  Up the rates of the reactors!”

“Rate hike, rate hike, tra la la,” a small, fat man sang.  Palmer, the head of the dormant Air and Space Division, finally spoke up.  “Please give some of the profits to the Space Division!”

Shinra was silent for a moment.  Then, “Reeve and Scarlet will divide the extra funds.”  Palmer deflated.

“Thank you, sir,” Scarlet smiled slyly.

“Sir!” a guard dressed in a black coat knocked on the wall to announce his presence, “Dr. Hojo is here to see you!”

“What perfect timing!” Shinra leaned back, “Bring him in!”  All heads turned to the door as the walking mass of complexes that was Hojo entered the room.  He was an unremarkable man as far as appearances went, but as far as brains and disposition, Hojo was world renowned as both a genius and a demon.  He seemed glued to his alabaster lab coat, never taking it off even to sleep, or so the rumor went.  His skin was a funny mix of colors that came from a lifetime of hovering above various chemicals, but now it was its usual pale self.  A long, greasy black ponytail adorned his head, and he wore thick glasses.  He looked most like an evil owl from the front.  Indeed, the very air seemed cold around Hojo, the head of Shinra’s Science and Technology department.

“Good day, lady and gentlemen,” Hojo spoke.  His voice was low and somewhat seductive, yet it possessed a slight squeal that most evil stereotypes were equipped with.  The best word to describe the voice…and the man…was eerie.

“Professor Hojo!” Shinra boomed, “You have news for us?”

“I don’t have anything earthshaking,” Hojo warned, “But I figured I should report anyway.”

Shinra nodded.  “The girl?”

“Yes,” Hojo nodded.  “As a specimen, she is inferior to her mother.  The signs of the Ancients tend to decrease with each new generation.  We’ve estimated the difference to be about 45 percent.”

“Right, right,” Shinra tried to get to something interesting.  “How long will the research take?”

Hojo flinched.  Obviously, he had hoped he would not be asked that question.  He looked up and took a breath.  “Probably 140 years.”  The air around the Shin-Ra executives died with their hopes.  “Certainly longer than any of our lifetimes, or that of the specimen.  That’s why we’re thinking of breeding her.”

“Breeding her?” Reeve asked critically.

“Yes,” Hojo smiled slightly, “I have a suitable combination that will serve to create a new specimen that will withstand a very long period of time.  My successors will finish the job with the new specimen.”

“Is she talking?”  Shinra’s voice was suddenly cold.

“About Ancient…stuff?” Hojo frowned.  “No.  I haven’t really asked.”

“Make her.  Force her.”  Shinra was dead serious.  “It is imperative that we get all the information about the Promised Land from her.”

Hojo bit his tongue with another frown.  He, like most people, had heard of the Promised Land from stories and legends, then finally from one of his “specimens”.  Hojo had no imagination whatsoever, being a hardcore scientist, and therefore made it common knowledge exactly what he thought of the Promised Land of legend, and he was trying very hard not to frown in disapproval at his boss.  “I’ll get on it.  Currently, though, I’m preparing her to meet with another of my favorite specimens.  If possible, I want the breeding business to get over with as soon as possible.”  Grimaces appeared on everyone’s face, including Hojo’s.  “But fear not.  You will have your Promised Land.”   When you die, you’re more than welcome to swim across the oceans of the Lifestream until you find your Promised Land, you old fool!  Hojo would have loved to say that.

“Very well,” Shinra nodded.  “Thank you, Professor.  You may return to your work.  And the rest of you,” he glanced around, “This meeting is adjourned.”

“Yes sir,” Heidegger said wearily.  He glanced at Scarlet as Shinra left the room.  “I hope he knows what he’s doing.”

“He thinks he does, and it fills our pockets, doesn’t it?” Scarlet said in a tone that could have been taken as friendly with someone else, but her voice was simply too cold for that particular emotion to seep into it.

“I agree!” Palmer waddled to the door, “If anyone needs me, I’ll be down in the rec center!”

“Gya ha ha!” Heidegger boomed as Palmer disappeared out the door, “He’ll just gorge himself on the candy from the vending machines!”

“I wonder if saturated fat even has any effect on him anymore?” Scarlet laughed.  “Phew!” she looked up at the vent, crinkling her nose.  “It stinks.”

“Yeah, it does,” Heidegger winced, “Let’s go before our royal noses fall off.”

“Kya ha!  God forbid!” Scarlet and Heidegger walked out laughing.




“She smelt us?” Tifa muttered as she dropped back down into the bathroom.

“Can we help it if we can’t afford the perfumes and colognes those monarchs got?” Barret was in bad shape.  “Royal noses!  I’ll blow your royal noses clear of your faces!”  And he had almost done so.  It had taken lots of whispered consolations from Cloud and Tifa to keep Barret from blowing a hole in the head of everyone down there.  There could be no commotion until Aeris was safe.

“We will,” Cloud promised them.  “The Shin-Ra will get their due.  Soon.”

“Cloud?” Tifa peeked her head out the door, “Hojo’s still there.  He’s talking to some lab assistants.”

“Really…” Cloud moved to the door and had a look.  The scientist was indeed there, finishing a conversation.

“Where ya think he’ll go?” Barret asked, “He knows where Aeris is, ya know.”

“Yeah!” Cloud nodded enthusiastically.  “He’ll probably be heading for his lab, two floors up.”

“Where’s the stairs?” Barret asked.

“Right where we came in,” Cloud replied.

“Here comes a guard!” Tifa hissed. 

“Do ya wanna risk noise?” Barret patted his gun.

“No,” Cloud answered, looking to Tifa.  She nodded, cracking her knuckles.




He’d thought he’d heard a noise nearby, but he couldn’t be sure.   Probably just a computer.  He bristled involuntarily as Doctor/Professor/Whatever Hojo walked by.  Unlike most Shinra executives, Hojo would look at everyone in the area, even the guards that no self-respecting king would pay any attention to, taking everything in.  It was eerie, the guard thought.  The scientist flashed his keycard and the door to the next floor opened.  They ran on timers now.  After another ten or so seconds, the door would close.

Abruptly, he felt a hand on his shoulder.  Odd, he hadn’t heard anyone coming.  As soon as he whirled, though, a fist equipped with a metal knuckle crashed into his face.  He was out cold.

“Hurry!” Cloud ordered, “Run to the stairs!”  AVALANCHE charged through the doorway just as it whooshed shut.

Immediately, they knew that this was not a very fun floor to be on.  The temperature was lower, for one, but the most obvious thing was that there were no people.  In sight, anyway.  The clicking of computer keyboards was evident, so people had to be working somewhere, but there were no patrolling guards.  Good.  Hojo was already down the hall and rounding a corner.

“Follow him,” Cloud ordered, “But be careful.  Hojo’s a real bastard.  God knows what he’s got lurking around here.”

“You’ve heard of him before?” Barret frowned.

“Yeah,” Cloud replied, “I always wondered what he looked like.”

“Enough,” Tifa interrupted, sensing some sadness in Cloud’s eyes, and this was not the time for that, though she was sympathetic to him.  “Let’s go!” 

AVALANCHE trailed the man in the white coat to a large, dark area lined with wooden crates.  In the center of the room, a large holding tube loomed high, connecting with Hojo’s Lab on the floor above them.

“Get down!” Tifa hissed as she saw a messenger coming towards them.  He passed AVALANCHE right by, going straight for Hojo, who was amusing himself by staring at the specimen inside the holding tank.  “God…” Tifa breathed when she saw it.  It was a beast, quite frankly, a wild dog.  It had fiery red fur and a full red mane, like a lion.  She frowned.  Was it a dog or a cat?  Either way, red was the dominant color.  Even its eyes glowed crimson.  On its side, the letters R.E.D. X.I.I.I were tattooed.

“Professor Hojo!” the messenger began, “Preparations are complete!  We await your arrival on the above floor.”

Hojo nodded, not really hearing, but understanding nonetheless.  “Time to get to work, my beautiful little specimen.”  He turned to the elevator in the corner and called back to his helper.  “Set up the controls and bring the Ancient in!”

“Yes sir!” he returned the way he came and Hojo entered the elevator.  Tifa stood and walked slowly, cautiously, towards the holding tank.

“It lookin’ deadly to ya?” Barret asked.

Tifa just stared pitifully at the creature.  “It looks like it’s on a long chain of tranquillizers or something.  I wonder if it’s going to be part of some biological experiment?”

Barret shuddered.  “This whole place gives me the willies!  And that doctor!  He looks like he could build Frankenstein in 8.2 seconds flat!  How do ya know that freak, Cloud?  Hey, Cloud!”

He wasn’t listening.  The mercenary was staring as if hypnotized at a large silver tank.  There was a faint red light emitting from it, and as soon as Tifa and Barret saw it, chills ran down their spines, though they could not know why.  Cloud walked up to it.  Right above a viewing window there was a small plaque with the letters J-E-N-O-V-A etched into it.

“Jenova?” Tifa mumbled the word, ringing a bell somewhere.

Cloud nodded and started mustering up his strength.  He peered through the viewing window.  Seconds later, he reeled back in a mixture of horror and disgust.

“What, dude?” Barret pressed, “What’s in there?”

“Look for yourself,” Cloud’s voice was hoarse.

Barret stared for a while at the steel tank, wondering what could be so horrible.  Finally, he walked towards it, shivering involuntarily as he got closer.  The red glow was getting brighter all of a sudden, and Barret thought he could make out a faint heartbeat.  He took a breath and looked through a viewer.

It was appalling.  He beheld a glowing purple creature crammed into the small confines of the tank.  It appeared to be a continuous muscle, lacking bones, and possessing an odd torso. Its shoulders were huge, ugly, and distorted.  And it currently had no head.

Barret reeled.  “My god!  That headless freak!”

“Cloud?” Tifa cried suddenly, “Are you ok?!”

Cloud was writhing slightly, crumpled into a heap, clutching his skull in pain.  His eyes were pressed tightly shut, and he was quite uncomfortable.  Tifa ran over to him, placing her hands on his shoulders and shaking him slightly.

“Hey!” she pleaded, “Come on, snap out of it!”

Cloud’s eyes snapped wide open, staring at the silver tank like it was something straight out of hell.  “Let’s go,” he said quietly, “This place…it isn’t safe.”  He rose and started for the elevator.  Tifa and Barret weren’t going t challenge his decision.  They followed close behind.

Cloud stopped before entering the elevator.  In the corner, he saw a glittering orb of green Materia.  He didn’t want to stay down here any longer, but he spared the time to pick it up.

“Whatcha got?” Barret asked.

“I feel sick,” Cloud replied, rolling the Materia in his hand, “Poison.”

“Woo!” Barret smirked, “I’ll take that if you don’t mind!”

Cloud handed it to him.  “Use it on human opponents,” he instructed, “But avoid using it on most monsters.  A good deal of them are either immune to poison or they’ll absorb the spell.  And all robots are immune to it.”

“Cheap,” Barret muttered, “But all right.”



They arrived in Hojo’s lab seconds later.  The first thing Cloud saw both relieved him and worried him greatly. 

“It’s her!” he sighed in relief, “It’s Aeris!”

“Where?” Tifa asked.

“Look.  The center of the room.  She’s in the holding tank!”

“Man, what’s that freak doctor gonna do to her?” Barret grumbled.

“Nothing,” Cloud promised himself, “Come on, we’re getting her out of this place!”

The lab was a large, domed room that was lit up entirely.  A circle of computers and other machines surrounded a glass holding cylinder identical to the one on the floor below it.  Perhaps they were linked?  There was a series of catwalks that made up a “second floor” of the room, all leading to a large sanctuary of machinery and a massive mainframe.  Hojo’s heaven, no doubt.  Hojo himself was down in front of the holding tank, typing something or other into one of the computers.  Aeris sat quietly in the tank, looking at Hojo with great distrust.  She appeared unharmed, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t.

Cloud, Tifa, and Barret ran straight for Hojo, startling the scientist, Aeris, and Hojo’s messenger/guard, who stood in the corner on the higher level.

“Who are you?” Hojo’s face was twisted in annoyance.

“We’re the ones who got drunk in Wall Market a few hours ago, and we stopped by to annihilate you shit heads!” Barret growled, leveling his gun at Hojo.

“Cloud!” Aeris jumped to her feet, looking over the room’s new occupants.

“Hojo,” Cloud stated, “We’re taking Aeris home.”

“Aeris?” Hojo mused, “Is that her name?”

“Now,” Cloud punctuated with a glare.

Hojo rolled his eyes, completely unnerved.  “Are you going to kill me?”

“I would like nothing more,” Barret smiled happily.
Hojo raised an eyebrow.  “I don’t think you should.”  He motioned to the computers around him, then finally to Aeris.  “The machinery here that controls the fate of the Ancient is extremely delicate.  Without me, who would operate it?  Hmm?”

Cloud stiffened.  “He’s right…”

“Rule one,” Hojo started, “Never tell an enemy he’s right.  It makes you appear weak.”

“You sound like some damn teacher,” Barret spat.

“I’m too smart to be a teacher,” Hojo said flatly.

“To hell with you!” Tifa yelled, “Let her go!”

“Rule two,” Hojo kept going, “Empty threats are useless, especially when used by an amateur.”

“Amateur?” Tifa tilted her head, “Those guys might kill you, but I can just beat you into a bloody pulp a few times until you release her.  And I will!”

Hojo sighed.  “Enough.  I’m beginning my experiment now.”  Cloud felt himself getting nervous, and more so was Aeris, fidgeting in the tank, wondering what fun this sadist had in store for her.  “Bring in the specimen!”

The floor of the tank whooshed, and a part of it slid back.  Aeris pressed herself to the glass wall, the fear showing on her face.  Seconds later, the large red beast was in the tank with Aeris, and it was looking at her rather strangely.

“My god!” Cloud raised his voice, “What are you doing?”

The fire-red beast leapt at Aeris, pressing her more into the wall, smacking her with its paws.

“It’s mauling her!” Tifa gasped.

“Do not fret so,” Hojo sighed again in distaste with his audience, “Both of these animals are on the verge of extinction!  I am merely helping them survive the test of time.”

Tifa felt sick, staring at the man in front of her that didn’t even seem human any more. 
“Aeris isn’t an animal!  She’s a human being, a living, conscious human being!”

“She is also the last of the Ancients,” Hojo pointed out.  Then, with a cruel grin: “But not for long.”

Then Cloud noticed something.  The beast was attacking Aeris, but it was slapping, not slashing.  And it wasn’t even really mauling her, but butting her with its head.  It was almost as if it was putting on a show to fool someone.  Maybe…Hojo?

“I’ve seen enough!” Barret boomed.

“What are you going to do?” Tifa asked nervously.

Barret raised his gun-arm to the top of the tank.  “Get back, y’all!”  A stream of gunfire followed his words.

“No!” Hojo cried, “Stop this!”  He could say no more.  A bright flash lit up the room and in another flash, this time a red blur, the beast was on top of Hojo, clawing and biting furiously.

“What happened?” Tifa called as the light died down.

“Hello?” Aeris called out as she readjusted her eyes, “Anyone alive?”

“Aeris!” Cloud ran into the tank, helping her out.

“Cloud…” she said softly, “I knew you’d come…”  It was clear that she was using all her discipline to refrain from hugging him.

“Well we couldn’t just up and ditch you, could we?”

“Of course not,” she smiled, “You’re supposed to be my bodyguard!”

“Did they hurt you?” he asked, concerned.

“No, no…I thought that lion thing would, but he didn’t…really.”

They were interrupted when Hojo let out a roar, pulling back his legs and extending them into the “lion thing” sending it flying back into the glass wall of the tank.  All present gasped slightly at the unexpected power in Hojo’s limbs.  Like most scientists, he’d appeared frail at first glance.

“This is a very violent specimen,” Hojo spat as he banged some buttons on one of the computers, “He’ll keep you busy for a good while!”

“What…?” Cloud asked nervously, drawing his sword.

“Enjoy!” Hojo laughed and ran to a corner, disappearing through an unseen door.

“The hell does Dr. Frankenstein there mean by-“ Barret was cut off when the elevator inside the tank activated.  It was bringing something up.

The fire-red beast peered around curiously, as if sizing up Cloud, Tifa, Barret, and Aeris.  It turned to Cloud, correctly identifying him as the leader.  Then, it surprised everyone there by speaking in a low, masculine voice.

“He’s a very powerful ‘specimen’.  Perhaps I can be of service to you in defeating him?”

“Wha…?” Barret recoiled, “It can talk?”

“He can talk,” the beast replied calmly, “Probably better than most humans.”

“You seem…intelligent…” Tifa said slowly.

“Probably more so than most humans,” he replied again, this time with a little grin.  “Oh, I’m sorry, you might think me cocky after a remark like that.”

“Not at all,” Cloud’s attention returned to the elevator.  “If you were offering your help, we’ll gladly accept it.”

“My pleasure,” the beast replied.

Cloud looked around, noticing that Aeris had no weapon.  She was only in more danger here.  “Tifa!  Take Aeris somewhere safe!”

“All right,” she replied, “You gonna be okay here?”

“Yes, now go!”  Cloud turned his attention to the coming battle.

“Come on,” Aeris directed Tifa, “I know where they stashed my weapon.”

“Lead the way.”  They were off.

Barret stiffened in disgust.  The enemy in front of them was hideous.  Picture a humanoid creature with a bulging greenish blue body with no visible eyes, two gnarled, twisted horns atop its head, and clawed hands carrying a large sword.

“The hell is that?” he shuddered.

Cloud placed his hand on the yellow Sense Materia, looking directly at the monster.  “SAMPLE.  Brilliant name, eh?”  He turned to the animal beside him.  “What’s your name?”

“Hojo has named me Red XIII,” he replied, “But you can call me whatever you wish.”

“Red’s fine with us.  So, Red, you ready to kill this thing?”

In response, Red XIII reared back on his hind legs and roared, startling the creature, SAMPLE, who had been summing up its enemies.  When Red came down, a burst of flames crashed into SAMPLE, sending it toppling back into the glass walls of the tank.  The sturdy glass shattered as the monster fell into it, but SAMPLE kept its footing. 

“You have Materia?” Barret asked, surprised.

“Fire-All and Sense,” Red replied quickly, then readied another attack.  Cloud didn’t wait.  He charged SAMPLE, sword flying out.  Enraged, the beast met Cloud’s sword with its own, and the strength of the counterattack was notable.  Cloud almost lost hold of his weapon.  Red’s burst of flames caught the monster off guard again, and it let out a horrible cry from what could be considered a mouth.

“Freak,” Barret grumbled as he unloaded his gun-arm at SAMPLE, angering it further.  Finally launching his own attack the monster slammed his sword into the ground.  A curtain of explosive energies spread out from where the sword met the ground, hitting all three combatants hard.  Red was the first one on his feet, quickly charging at SAMPLE.  The monster’s sword went flying every which way, but the agile creature easily evaded each swipe, darting from side to side, weaving its way to SAMPLE.  He pounced, smashing his large headdress into SAMPLE’s chest.  A small explosion emitted from the connection, and Red flew back through the air, curled up and spinning like a ball, and landed on his feet.

Barret had been working up an Ice spell, and let it fly into SAMPLE.  Cloud had just been observing, waiting patiently for a chance to strike or for someone to heal.  But Red seemed more than capable of taking care of himself.  He was a mysterious creature, in many ways.  Cloud’s thoughts were interrupted when a bolt of fire crashed into his arm.  It torched his flesh nicely, but it could only be a 1st degree burn or less.  With a snarl, Cloud spun around to face what looked like a one-eyed silver beetle.  He noticed two more, hidden in the shadows.  They were SAMPLE’s henchmen, ready to defend their master. 

“Barret!” he called, “We got company!”

“I see ‘em!” Barret called, ducking to avoid another beam of flames from the red eye of one beetle, “Handle Scary Spice over there!  I’ll cover ya!”

Cloud nodded and broke into a run for SAMPLE itself.  Barret spat a curse and started shooting at one of the beetles, surprising it.  It was a smoking wreck a few seconds later.  The others hopped around like jumping beans, impossible to hit with a gun.  So Barret tried the next best thing.  Before the Ice spell could be launched, however, its enemy fire exploded into Barret’s chest.

“Argh!” the big man cried as he staggered back.  His chest stung a good deal, and his heart was racing, but the Fire spell wasn’t powerful enough to do any serious damage to him.  Too many hits, however, and he could roast to death, a trick he’d practiced himself many times on different foes.  He had the Materia right now, but for some reason, Ice seemed to be the better bet.  A curtain of green surrounded him and a column of ice crashed into the small machine, freezing its joints.  The third one bounced towards him, hopping up and down too fast to shoot at.  Tired and annoyed, Barret waited for the beetle to get close, then smacked it with the steel of his gun-arm, sending it clear across the room like some kind of baseball.  It didn’t get up.

SAMPLE’s sword attack hit again, the explosive energies jolting Red into a crumpled heap.  Cloud had hidden behind his sword again, but the force not only jerked his blade out of he ground but rattled Cloud’s body like a maraca.  He looked to a panting Red, who was a bit spent.  Cloud concentrated on healing wounds, and the Restore Materia glowed bright.  The All’s energies seeped into the spell, and both Cloud and Red felt rejuvenated. 

“Impressive!” Red complimented, meaning it. 

“What now?” Cloud asked nervously, seeing SAMPLE stomping towards them.

“Stall him!” Red growled, “I’ll take care of the rest!”

The ex-SOLDIER nodded, putting to use his training and ran around SAMPLE, making a circle around it.  The dense monster’s attention was entirely on Cloud, following it with its eyes or whatever it used to see.  Seconds later, Cloud heard a roar and turned to see Red, encased in a glowing red aura, speed at SAMPLE with the effect of a fireball.  His fangs severed into the beast as he hit, jolting SAMPLE back and tearing though it at the same time.  Black blood oozed from the wounds and SAMPLE freaked, screaming as if possessed. 

“Impressive,” Cloud commented.

“A Limit skill,” Red explained, “Sled Fang.”

“Impressive,” Cloud repeated. 

Before another move could be made, a quick series of lightning bolts flew through the air.  SAMPLE screamed again as they connected, sending a column of electricity up its body.  It collapsed in a heap and was still.

“And here I was afraid I’d miss the fun part,” Tifa smirked, moving towards her comrades, Aeris in pursuit.

“Phew, good to see ya, sistah!” Barret clapped her on the back.

“We’ve got what we came for,” Cloud spoke, casting a relieved look at Aeris, who now held her Striking Staff, “Now let’s get out of here.”

“We have all the keycards from this floor down,” Tifa pointed out, “Let’s hitch a ride on the elevator.”

“There’s one on the floor below us,” said Red, much to the surprise of Aeris.

“You can talk…wow…” she was awed, but still obviously nervous around the creature.

“I apologize for my behavior in the tank,” Red pasted a little smile on his canine face, “It was only necessary to throw off Hojo.  I hope I didn’t harm you…?”

“No, no,” Aeris replied, breathing easy again, a forgiving smile on her face, “Thanks.”   She looked around.  “All of you, thanks!”

“No problem,” Tifa nodded.

“Thank you,” Barret spoke up, “You saved my daughter.  I’d probably have died to help you.”

“Uh,” Aeris shrugged, a bit embarrassed, “Thanks…your daughter’s a nice girl.”

They were quiet for a while.  Then, Cloud snapped to action.

“Get going,” Cloud waved Tifa and Aeris off, “We’ll meet up with you at the elevator.”

“Tyin’ up some loose ends,” Barret explained, looking nervously around the room.

“Yes,” Red nodded, “I sense it too…”

Tifa nodded.  “We’ll meet at the elevator.  Don’t take too long!”




“What?  Impossible!”

“It happened, you imbecile!”

“It’s utterly impossible,” the gruff voice repeated over the intercom, “We would have known!  Our security systems are top notch!”

“Listen, you cow!  They were right in front of me!  They trashed my SAMPLE!  And get this, oh great deity, they took my Ancient!”

The other end was quiet.  “No…oh, no…”

“Don’t just sit there you fool!  Get to work!  Catch them!  Use the Turks if you have to!  Don’t let them get away!”

“The magic word is ‘decaf’, Hojo!” the other man spat, “I’ll catch them!”

“Get on it, Heidegger!”  Hojo moved to kill the connection.  “I’ve waited far too long for this Ancient, the answer to all my questions!”




Cloud, Red, and Barret snuck through the crates with a cat’s agility…literally, in Red’s case.
Cloud had cast a worried look at the Jenova tank, but nothing more.  They moved carefully, yet quickly.  A confrontation was to be avoided if possible, but AVALANCHE had its quarry.  They could kill anything now.

They slipped into the glass elevator, all feeling a sense of great accomplishment.

“We did it!” laughed an energetic Barret, “We invaded the castle of death and came out with everything we wanted!”

The doors closed.

“I suppose you did.”  Everyone went rigid.

“Down, please,” another new voice, this one deep and low.  The first one was a familiar, hated voice.

Cloud turned around slowly, as did his counterparts.  Standing before them was a tall man with shoulder length black hair, and another stocky, bald man wearing dark shades.

“Did I stutter…?” the bald one said in his low tone.

“…No,” Cloud conceded wisely.  The Turks had moved brilliantly, following them into the elevator where they had no room to fight or run.  Cloud pushed past a glowering Barret and a quiet Red and hit the button.

“Was it fun for you?” Tseng hissed, angry that someone had dared to free the prey he’d spent so long trying to catch, “I’m sure it was a real thrill!”

“Yeah, it was, ya Shinra scum!” Barret retorted, “My only regret is that I didn’t put a bullet in Prez Shinra’s head when I had the chance.”

“So you got to the president?” asked the other one, “I’m impressed.”

“Don’t be, Rude,” Tseng said to his partner/underling/whatever, “They’re gods, they are.”

“We’ll be taking a private elevator on a lower level,” Rude explained, “From then on, you’ll have another ‘chance’ at the Prez, Wallace.  But I really don’t think you’ll have any luck.”

Tseng grinned.  “This time, we won’t forget to exterminate thee, AVALANCHE!”