--The 1996 Queensbury Cross Country Running Log--
The Official Cross Country 1996 Senior Team Log
(In no specific order)
1) One day, while the boys varsity team was on a mountain run, they came across
a stray kitten. With a little coaxing from the team, the kitten would sprint past
them and then walk for a little ways and sprint again. Eventually she reached the
bottom of the mountain, and the team decided to take her home. They used Colin
Sullivan's bandanna to wrap up the kitten, and ran with her back to the school.
Looking back on their exploits of the day, they decided to name her "Fartlek",
after the sprint-jog workout that she performed on her descent down the mountain.
After a few days, the Fartlek finds a home in the house of Sue Dinolfo.
2) Our first senior day was a relaxed one, with a fifteen minute jog to the
reservoir followed by us jumping from the top of the tree into the water below.
While we were swimming, we acquired a shopping cart which we wheeled back to the
school with A.J. riding shotgun. While at school, we used the cart, A.J. still a
passenger, to do striders up and down the sidewalk. When Coach Sweeney catches
sight, he told us to "make it disappear," which Colin and A.J. do -- in his back
yard.
3) While on one of our "three-mile-trail" runs, we decided to stop at Mike
Legere's house to go swimming. Unfortunately, Mike forgot to tell his mom who was
quite surprised to see twenty guys file into her backyard and jump into the pool.
4) During yet another "three-mile-trail" run, the varsity boys came out onto the
road along the normal route, where we were cordially invited to join in for a jump
on a friendly neighbor's trampoline. So, being the nice guys we are, we took off
our shoes and hit that mesh.
5) While on one of our easy days, we decided it was time to embark on our
traditional stream run. We ran to the gorge and jumped right in. The water was
cold at first, but we got used to it after the numbness set in. Despite the
occasional whines of the freshmen, everything was fine. That's until the mud fight
broke out. We all survived with a few battle wounds, except for Eric Williams, who
was picked to be the first man ever to try to see through dirt. Unfortunately, it
didn't work. Everything turned out to be all right in the end, and the tradition
continued.
6) Of course, it wouldn't be a true season if we didn't go for a Martha's run.
We took the normal route under the Northway, and stuffed our faces when we got
there. We were all fat and happy on the way back to school, when Chris LaFleur
decided to demonstrate a practical use for a Martha's cup by making wild animal
sounds, which were darn realistic.
7) On one of our daily warm-up runs, someone had the bright idea to pick up four
or five pine-cones per person to hurl at the girls. The reason for this was quite
simple -- the girls were being lazy and constantly performed what they referred to
as "swing-set days". So, in a pilots formation, we held our ammo until the target
was in range. At the command, we released our ammo with pinpoint accuracy. The
girls didn't know what had hit them. With the girls bewildered, and still
shielding themselves from the onslaught of seeds from the heavens, we made a speedy
getaway hollering our battle-cry, "Guys rule!" They're still picking pine pitch
our of their hair.
8) Another fun quarrel we had with the girls team was about the bus. Both teams
wanted the back of the bus, because it was the farthest from the coaches and seemed
to have a more comfortable seating arrangement. At first, the girls dominated it
do to the fact that the varsity boys race was always the last race of the day. The
revolt began at the Shaker Invitational when the varsity boys team sent the
Freshmen boys to tape off the back seats. We knew that would not hold them for
long, so the boys didn't stop running their race until they were in the back seats
of the bus. The war still continues.
9) The night before the Grout Invitational, Mark Losinger and a few of the boys
made T-shirts, which jokingly said, "Sweeney is GOD." We made them for the entire
Varsity boys team, and when we had our team meeting after we got off the bus, we
surrounded Coach Sweeney. When he looked up, he burst into laughter along with the
rest of the team. He later told us not to show the other officials the shirts for
fear of disqualification.
10) One day, while running in Potter Woods, we ran down to Halfway Brook and
proceeded to cross it on a narrow log to avoid getting our feet wet. That day, Mr.
Sullivan, our illustrious coach, happened to be running with us, but fell behind
the pack in order to go to the bathroom. He told us to go ahead, and that he would
catch up. So, we ran to the top of the hill and waited. After fifteen minutes had
passed, we were ready to go back down the hill and see what was taking him so long.
As soon as we began our descent, we saw Mr. Sullivan, scratched and wet, coming
towards us. When we inquired as to what had happened to him, he said that he had
took a header off of the log. By the time we got back to the school, he had grown
a huge bump on his shin. It looked like an alien was using him as a host.
Sweeney's comment was, "Don't kill my coach, he's all I have!"
11) After a challenging season, we closed victorious and recorded fifty-six
straight victories. The extremely confusing South High course had orange arrows
scattered about it, and since it was our last dual meet, we decided to add water to
a grease fire and permanently borrow all of their arrows. Here's a tip about that
course, once you go in, you will never come out.
12) As the captains of the Cross Country Team, Dan Yousey, Colin Sullivan, and
Eric Williams each made a contribution to the team. Dan with his leadership, Colin
with his happy-go-lucky attitude, and Eric with his whoop ass speeches were all
invaluable to the performance of the team on a daily basis. Before almost every
meet, Eric would gather us up in a huddle and we would stretch our ears to hear him
say his magical forecast, "Partly cloudy, chance of rain, and a 98% chance of whoop
ass today." The forecast always came true.
13) One fine day, we found ourselves running through the neighborhood beside the
school on our way back from an easy run. As we were running, we were joking about
Yousey's obesity and began to laugh and taunt him as we always did about his make-
believe weight problem. He surprised us all with he just stopped running and said,
"I quit!" However, we all knew he was just kidding, so we just played along and as
Yousey started to walk in the opposite direction, we taunted him some more. We
knew that once he got to the corner, he would be out of sight and would then take
an alternate route back to school. This gave us enough time tom convince the girls
team and some of the boys team, including the coaches that Yousey had really quit.
We were so convincing that Coach Sullivan insisted on looking for him even though
he knew it was a joke. Good old coach Sullivan, always thinking of others. Dan
arrived five minutes later, and we told him of our scheming and we all had a good
laugh.
14) We've run in Potter Woods for as long as I can remember; and yet, such a
beautiful place is polluted by trash. So, in keeping with an environmental
conscience world, we decided to clean it up a little. One day while running, we
found a gigantic three hundred pound, old, rusty water-heater. We devised a
devilish plan that would eventually take it our of Potter Woods and into Sweeney's
back yard. Each day that we had an easy run, we would go back to where we had left
it last and roll it little by little until our time was up. Eventually, it came to
be that it was near enough so that we could make a dash for Sweeney's back yard,
but what would we do once we got it there? The answer struck us like lightning!
We would leave our mark as the teams of yesteryear had done -- with paint. So the
next free day we had, we gathered up some money and put the plan into action. With
a couple of cans of yellow and blue spray paint, we created our masterpiece in
Sweeney's back yard. With a bright yellow exterior and gigantic blue "Q" on the
front, it was hard to miss. Sweeney sure didn't miss it either, and the day after
he found it, he drilled us for a half an hour before practice began and ended with,
"I love you guys to death, but its hard to when I look out my backdoor and see a
three hundred pound, banana yellow water heater with a giant blue 'Q' on the
front." We still chuckle about it today.
15) To culminate our log, and our season, Eric Williams had invited everyone to
an Italian Restaurant, by the name of Calabrio, for some home cooked Italian
cuisine. The seniors as well as the Sectionals team came to feast. Sweeney even
showed up for a few minutes to much some garlic bread and tell his tales of the
"college glory days". Eric's father graciously picked up the bill, (which forced
him to take out a second mortgage on his house to pay), and we sat for a while
laughing and chatting amongst ourselves. Coach Sullivan unfortunately could not
make it to the dinner, so we decided to bring the food to him. We showed up at his
door with pasta in hand. He invited us all in and quizzed us on his daughter's
names, and then proceeded to challenge us with his daughters' homework. We all
rose to the occasion in unison and said, "BEAR!" A few minutes later, we had to
depart to make another date, so we said our good-byes and took to the streets in a
six car convoy. Our travels took us into the neighborhood of Guin Jones's house,
which happened to be where the girls were currently having their own pasta dinner.
We took the back way into the yard, pretending to be ninjas, and surprised the
girls team. Then we proceeded to wrestle with them, bounce them off of the
trampoline, and pose for cameo shots in the living room. We had great fun and
Guin's mom was thanked many times over. I still hope, to this day, that nothing
was broken. Vive la pasta!
All of these accounts are truthful, and believe it or not, really did happen.
No adults or authority figures were involved in the planning or execution of these
events, so if you're looking for someone to blame, you'll have to catch us first.
Also, no animals, insects, or people were hurt during the execution of these
events, except for that near sighted wallaby and Dan, but we cloned him and made a
new-improved Dan so everything worked out in the end.
--The Boys X-C Team of 1996-97--
A Brief Summary of the Activities of the JV Team
(more like a confession)
1) Pie Day - Every Wednesday, six members of the JV team, who were trying to
gain back the calories that they had lost at the dual meet the previous day, would
run to 5 Finch Road for pie. Mrs. Losinger would always have a pie ready, because
Mark would tell her what to bake the night before. Those six members would sit on
the back porch, eat pie, and be merry.
2) Nintendo Day - One afternoon, eight members of the JV team went over to Mike
Fine's house to play nintendo. Three or Four people supplied games, controllers,
and Mike provided the Nintendo. This was a joyous occasion. Jed Kelly was quoted
as saying, "We're takin' it back to 1986, baby!"
3) Volleyball - We arrived at Jason Yovanoff's house to find six people playing
volleyball. We thought it would be just splendid to play a game, since there were
six of us as well. Well, we lost badly, but we scheduled a rematch for the day
after our speed workout. We all know what happened the day of the rematch; but, we
learned our lesson. Lesson: Kyle is really bad at volleyball.
4) Tree Pushing - This happened so many times, it's impossible to summarize each
occasion But I'll say this: No one can push a tree better than Chris LaFleur.
5) Kraig - He got thrown in the shower. Welcome to Queensbury, Kraig.
"But at least we didn't push that big ass thing into Sweeney's yard!" -- Mark
Losinger
--The 1996 Official Queensbury Cross Country "Quotes"--
"Was micht nicht totet mach mich starker." -- Friedrich Nietzsche.
"No speed limits." -- Coach Sullivan.
"Nice spandex, Sweeney!" -- A phrase uttered by anyone who's ever run with Coach
Sweeney.
"Chris LaFleur, get off the hump!" -- All of the Queensbury bus drivers.
"Caitlin, GO HOME!"-- A.J., when in the presence of Caitlin Hickin.
"It's gonna be partly cloudy, windy, and a 98% chance of whoop ass." -- Eric
Williams, before our races.
"It's Hell." -- Caitlin Hickin after the Foothills Invitational.
"A.J. made me bleed down my thigh!" -- Nicole Lusignan.
"T.W.L." -- Andy Delsignore.
"B" -- Colin Sullivan ( Which later became Andy Delsignore's nickname because of his
participation in the JV "B" race at Guilderland).
"Coach, Dan quit the team!" -- Words uttered by his senior teammates.
"Go to Hell, A.J." -- Caitlin Hickin.
"NO MORE MEETINGS" -- Words scrawled on a sign held up by Mark Losinger at one of
the numerous team meetings.
"Are you done?" -- Coach Sweeney.
"WHO'S THROWIN' SHIT?!" -- Chris LaFleur.
"If she didn't want it she wouldn't have been running in the woods!" -- Dan's
defense in court.
"It's your race to lose." -- Coach Sweeney.
"I think Povorelli might have a shot at winning an invy this year." -- Coach Hoek.
"SWEENEY IS GOD" -- The words printed on the varsity boys team T-shirts at the Grout
Invy.
"SWEENEY HATES ME" -- Mark Losinger's paradox T-shirt to "SWEENEY IS GOD".
"Make it disappear!" -- Sweeney's gracious response to the shopping cart striders.
"If you had run faster, you would've done better" -- Lloyd Mott's philosophy on
running.
"Ya gotta win the race up here (pointing to his head)." -- Coach Sweeney.
"YOUSEY ATE THE Q!!!!" -- Amanda Valenti's rationalization on why Yousey was late
for the Manhattan Invy.
"It's gonna be fifteen minutes of Hell either way." -- Coach Sweeney's philosophy on
running at the Manhattan Invy.
"Yousey, get up here! The bus driver doesn't know her way to SPAC!" -- Coach
Sullivan on the way to Foothills.
"THIS is the eye of the tiger (poking at his own eye)." -- Coach Hoek at Johnstown
in 1994.
"My team would have beaten yours if the course had been longer." -- Coach Madrick on
why his Johnstown team lost to Queensbury at the first dual meet of the
season.
"No regrets." -- Sullivan and Sullivan; INC. What they came up with while the team
was at Troy with their U-HAUL loading trophies up.
"We would have won if your guy had shown us the right course." -- Baker after
Johnstown lost to Queensbury.
"LET'S WALK THE COURSE!" -- Sarcastically said by the Queensbury boys when Johnstown
delayed the dual meet for an hour by walking the course.
"Quick, get on the bus! They're playing the Macarena!" -- The Queensbury boys team
during their warm down run at the Guilderland Invy.
"NIEN! SWINE-HUND!" -- Yousey's mindless Nazi babble.
"Coach, I twisted my ankle!" -- Jason Combs with a creative reason for dropping out
of the Guilderland Invitational.
"Yea, I was up in third for a while, but I had to stop to take a piss." -- Jason
Combs on why he didn't win the dual meet against Johnstown.
"YOU KILLED JERRY!" -- The Queensbury boys team to Sweeney after it was discovered
Jaron's lung had deflated during a practice.
"This is my new friend, Earl." -- Jaron Shevy, introducing his lung inflation device
at the Hospital.
"Averill Park doesn't cut their warm-ups." -- muttered by the Queensbury boys team
as a future T-shirt idea for the girls team.
"So when do we get our trophy?" -- Coach Sullivan's question of when we would get
our trophy for seventh place at Shaker.
"I love you guys to death, but it's hard to when I look out my backdoor and see a
300 pound, banana yellow, water heater with a giant blue 'Q' painted on the
front." -- Coach Sweeney in a meeting he had shortly after the Queensbury boys
team decided to show him their artistic talent in a big way.
"Sullivan rules!" -- Painted in large letters on the giant yellow water heater in
Sweeney's back yard.
"BEAR!" -- said by the Queensbury boys team in helping Mr. Sullivan's daughter with
her homework.
"Come on over here guys; Jed, pull your pants up!" -- Coach Sullivan before
introducing the team to his family.
"Team circle, LaFleur has to get his underwear on." -- Coach Sullivan.
"Cigar smoke and twinkie eat at Yousey's." -- mysteriously written on Sweeney's
board before every meeting.
"What are you, the poster boy for LL Bean?" -- Coach Sweeney's remark to Mark
Losinger about his running apparel.
"Fat check!" -- A phrase exclaimed by the boys Cross Country Team when squeezing
through the tiny slots in the brick wall near the pool area.
"Macadam, What the HELL is Macadam?" -- Boys Cross Country Team during numerous
meetings with Sweeney.
"Craig with a K, put some clothes on!" -- Boys Cross Country Team (you'd get it if
you were in the locker room).
"PHYSICS!" -- Andy Delsignore quoting the famous Hewitt.
"Shitbags Rule!" -- Andy Delsignore and Shane Stewart after the naming of the team
captains.
"Watch out for goobies!" -- Coach Hoek during EVERY SINGLE RUN we had with him.
"PIT!" -- Andy Delsignore during monotonous bus rides.
"Everyday is a swing-set day, ahhh!" -- A.J. after seeing the girls' creative cross
country shirts.
"Where is pumpkin, where is pumpkin; there he is, there he is; HIT HIM with a
BUCKBOMB, HIT HIM with a BUCKBOMB; in the head, in the head." -- Sung to the
tune of 'where is Thumbkin' by the Boys Cross Country Team.
"Oh shit, Aurrichio lives!" -- Muttered by the senior boys after Jeff Aurrichio
decided to take his leave from the Marines to come to the Troy Invy.
"Wanna see me binge?" -- Yousey at the tailgate party after Foothills.
"Where the hell are you guys going?" -- Queensbury Boys Cross Country Team to Scotia
at the Ballstan Spa dual meet.
"Who are we gonna beat? Queensbury!" -- Scotia saying their psych-up speech before
the Ballstan Spa dual meet.
"But at least we didn't push that big ass thing into Sweeney's yard!" -- Mark
Losinger commenting on the senior's escapades after confessing to his own
illicit activities.
"Through sands, through streams, through hills and HELL; the streak continues
56-0." -- Saying for the 1996 Queensbury Cross Country shirts.
"How the hell did you guys win anything, you never ran!" -- Mr. Signor to the Cross
Country runners in his class after their write up in the Post Star.
"Fuck shit up." -- Mark Losinger's goal for next year's boys Cross Country Running
Team.
This documentation has been truthful in its entirety and honestly written for
the sole purpose of releasing our coaches, Mr. Kevin Sullivan and Mr. Patrick
Sweeney, of any moral, logical, or lawful implications the above actions may have.
The undersigned assumes all responsibility for the enumerated actions, and
understands that legal action may be taken against them in any future instances of
mischief. Any further flaunting of the law or morals of the Queensbury Cross
Country Running Team will not be tolerated and will accordingly be punished to the
furthest extent of the law. Any attempts at altering, changing, or deleting any of
the team traditions, i.e. Martha's runs, Dirt Dogs' runs, stream runs, and mountain
runs will be dealt with by the immediate disbarring of the guilty party from any
relation to the Queensbury Cross Country Team.
WHATEVER!
Congratulations on a winning season and the continuation of "THE STREAK"
56 - 0 Baby!). We hope that in the future, with you as our coach, the Queensbury
Cross Country Team will rise to bigger and better things than ever imagined. Thank
you for your support, Coach Sullivan, and welcome to our team. I speak for all of
the seniors when I say that this season has been the most memorable of all, thanks
to you.