Final Fantasy 8TM; and its characters are property of SquareSoft© :)
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Lies
Written by Quistis Kinneas.



- II -


"I know someday you'll have a beautiful life
I know you'll be a star
In somebody else's sky,but why
Why,why can't it be
Why can't it be mine?"
Black-Pearl Jam


Quistis took a glance at her wrist-watch and arranged her glasses,sighing.For the last half an hour she gave to her students their grades and their final valuation results,so,they would have their one month vacation without worring about school.All the young people that sat in front of her,at the training centre,gave her their total attention while she was doing her final speech before their vacation...
"Well,after you're back from your so well deserved vacation,you'll have a harder training.It will be your last semester here in Balamb Garden before your final test to SeeD.So,use wisely this month.I hope you,at least,get some exercise to not lose your shape.The ones who didn't have a satisfactory grade on this semester will have another chance to get a good grade on this first vacation week.I know it's not the perfect solution,but it is better than repeat everything that you've learned during this semester...well,I won't take more of your time now.I hope you have fun and be back in one month ready to study!Good bye..."
The students got up and slowly got away from the training centre.Some of them stopped to talk to Quistis about something or just to say good bye to her.After some minutes,Quistis was alone at the centre.
She got up from her chair and walked through the centre,without preocupation.The students always used the training centre to meetings or other things,and many accidents happened there,but nothing as serious as what happened to her.She was an expert and almost died there.She had no reasons at all...she just wanted to distract her mind from the past events.But when she closed her eyes to wipe the tears from her face,a monster attacked her from behind,and her whip was lost.If Cid haven't come,things could be really bad for her.After that accident,Cid decided to keep the monsters on their cages...and Quistis on the infirmary for weeks...
Quistis reached a balcony where she could see Balamb Garden from behind.That was her favourite place,where she could stay alone and think,when she needed.It was the same place where she had a conversation with Squall,more than three years ago,almost revealing him her feelings,and he dismissed her.It was also the same place where she had that terrible fight with Irvine.
Lighting a cigarette,she leaned against the balcony.Memories filled her mind on that moment.She usually leaned there and remembered every phrase she told Irvine on that day,two years ago,when she tought that Irvine was still with Selphie.How many times she returned there and wished she had the chance to change things...but now it was too late.
Some time ago,she still had a hope,when Selphie had returned from Galbadia bringing some news...she could remember it very well...

'Quistis was sitting in one of the chairs of the Teacher's Room,correcting some tests.Zell was also preparing a test for his students and Squall discussing some things with Edea.Then Selphie entered the room,like a twister:
"People!I'm back from Galbadia!And you bet,I have wonderful news..."
Quistis stopped her actions and felt freeze.The others approached Selphie curious:
"So,what are the news?",asked Zell.
"Irvine is back!"
Quistis felt her heart beat faster as Selphie talked his name.A mix of anxiety and fear entered her veins,and Quistis could not stay any longer.She got up and broke her friends attention:
"Quistis?Where are you going?",asked Selphie.
She turned to them uncomfortable and said:
"I have...some things to do...I...well,I'll talk to you later..."
Quistis turned to the door and entered in the library,the first door she found.She sat on a bench and turned on the computer,but her hand stopped over the screen.Her mind was not there anymore,she was thinking about Irvine...
He was back,after one year...she didn't want to hear about him.And if he was married?Or dating someone?Or even if he was still a bachelor?Would he remember her?She didn't want to know...each memory about him just made her feel more depressed.
"Quistis?"
She turned her head back and found Edea,smiling to her.
"Can I sit?"
"Sure."
Edea sat by Quistis' side and asked:
"So...what's the problem?"
"What are you talking about?"
"I know you since you were a little girl...you're like a daughter for me...and I see you become so sad when we talk about Irvine...what happened?"
Quistis sighed and looked to the screen:
"It's nothing really...I mean...you know why he went away?"
"No..."
"Because of me...we had a discussion on that day,on the party,I told him that I didn't want to see him anymore and he went away..."
"I see...and why you discussed?"
"I don't really know.I guess we just lost control...and I had drank too much...he was...you know,hitting on me and I tought he had no respect for Selphie at all,that...they were still together..."
"And how do you feel about it?"
"What can I say?I guess I miss him...I...like him more than I thought..."
"You are in love with him,aren't you?"
She sighed and agreed:
"I guess I am.I always thought him so stupid and selfish...but I liked him.And he started talking to me so gently,pleasing me...I thought he was interested in me,but I had no expectations at all.I could be just one more for him.And that's what I thought.But when he came to me on that night...I did everything wrong.And I hurt him.So he went away.Now,he must have forgotten me..."
"That's what you think?"
"Yes."
"You know something?The first thing he asked Selphie about when he arrived there was if you were fine and if you found someone..."
"Did he?",she asked curious.
"Yes.So...I guess there is a possibility that Irvine still cares about you..."
Quistis stared at the computer and said:
"And why do I care anyway?Even if I love him,there is no chance for us...I don't want to get involved with someone like him...I promised myself..."
"And if he is different from the others?And if he really loves you?Come on Quistis,give him a chance!Please,promise me...if he comes here,talk with him.Just a simple talk.Promise me..."
Quistis sighed:
"Okay...if you insist...I'll talk with him...'

But he never came,and Quistis came to the conclusion that he never cared about her at all.And then,some months after,Gabriel appeared and proposed her.Quistis accepted because she didn't want to have expectations anymore.She had some bad memories about her past,and Irvine was exactly the kind of man that would never take her seriously.She didn't want to love him more than he could love her.She didn't want to live with a man that was her opposite,even if sometimes her heart cried out for him.No.Gabriel would give her a quite life,with no expectations.He would be a good husband,and she would never care about his steps,or what would he do if she was not with him.Irvine probably would throw himself in the arms of the first woman he saw,as soon as she turned back...and then his love would vanish...what kind of future she would have?
She finished her cigarette and lighted another one,taking some puffs from it.Life was not a joke,it was not perfect.And she could not have everything she wanted.It was not just a matter of Irvine coming there and tell her 'I love you'...there were so many things behind their feelings...so many things...she didn't need just love...she needed more...
She closed her eyes and sighed.She knew that it was the right thing to do,but inside her heart...she just wanted to see him once more.Even not expecting anything at all...
"Teacher?",someone behind her called.
Quistis felt her blood freeze inside her veins.That voice...she heard it so many times,but now,just the sound of that voice made her heart beat faster...she tried to control herself,she tried to keep her compusure...
Thinking about that,she turned around and found Irvine,in front of her.He smiled and took off his hat,bowing.
She smiled back and said:
"Kinneas..."
"I'm back...",he said putting his hat on.
Quistis closed her eyes for a moment,then looked at him again.He smiled back to her...oh,she had forgotten how beautiful was his smile...the left extremity of his lips extended and it forced his eyebrows downward making his eyes almost close on a way that could make his expression seems malicious.If someone asked her what Irvine used to conquer women she would say that his smile was his weapon.Well,at least,it was the first thing she noticed when they met for the first time on Galbadia Garden.She would never forget how it happened...
Galbadia's Principal called him twice before they notice Irvine.He was laid on the fields,with his hat over his face.It took some minutes before he got up.He just stared with his back turned to them,his gun on his shoulder.Then he turned back and smiled...the same smile that was on his face on that moment.
"Quistis?",she heard Irvine's voice bringing her back to reality.
Quistis just turned to him and said:
"It's good to see you..."
"You are so beautiful...",he said waving his hands on his particular way.
"Thank you.You are also very well.A Public Relations..."
"Oh,yes,I...I am...I passed some time on..."
"Travia.I know.Edea told me."
"And you...what have you been doing?"
"Teaching...as always."
"I see you became an addicted to nicotine..."
She took a glance at her hand and said:
"Yes...I guess I got some bad habits..."
"I heard you are engaged..."
Quistis felt the blood run away from her face:
"Well,I...I am.I'll marry in some days..."
There was some silence between them.Irvine walked until the balcony and stared at the sky:
"Are you happy with him?"
The question caught her.She didn't expect Irvine to be so direct with her.
"He is a good man."
"I didn't ask you this."
"Why do you care about my happiness?"
"I care about you."
Quistis stared at him,surprised.
"So..."
Irvine took her hands and his eyes entered hers as he said:
"There is so much I must tell you...I came here...because of you.I came because I couldn't forget you,because you were on my mind,and on my hea..."
"Kinneas!What a surprise..."
Quistis separated from Irvine as she heard the voice behind them:
"Gabriel!..."
A blond man with an authoritarian expression approached them and kissed Quistis' lips.Irvine turned his head to not see that.
"So,Galbadia's nº1 shooter is here!What a surprise...I didn't know that you...know each other..."
Irvine sighed:
"Yes,we know each other."
"Isn't it great?My old friend is my fianceé's friend..."
"Are you friends?",asked Quistis.
"You can bet,"answered Irvine",I won't bother you,I'll...get prepared for the party.I'll see you there,then..."
Irvine gave a last look to Quistis and went away.Gabriel turned to Quistis and she asked:
"When did you met?"
"We studied together in Galbadia Garden.And...we are not friends to be exact..."
"No?"
"Irvine always envied me because I was better than him...he always liked to take things from me,you know?But it didn't work...as you see,today I'm a Coronel...and he is a shooter..."
Quistis didn't answer him.She just sighed and said:
"The party will start soon.I'll go to my room to dress up..."
"Ok...I'll meet you later..."
Quistis went away and left Gabriel alone.He smiled and whispered:
"So,Kinneas...you like her...isn't it a coincidence?..."

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Irvine sighed,impatiently.He needed to talk with Quistis desperatly,he needed to tell her about his feelings,he needed to tell her that he loved her,explain things...but it seemed that Gabriel would not give him a minute.Since they'd arrived there,Gabriel didn't let Quistis alone for one second.They talked with people,they danced,drank...he didn't even let her talk with her friends alone.
He drank the wine on his cup for once and Zell,that was on the table with him and Selphie,exclaimed:
"Irvine!The way you're going you'll get drunk before midnight!"
"I don't care...I see that my chances are getting smaller,so...I don't want to see the rest of the night..."
"What's happening with you?"asked Selphie,"where's that Irvine I knew?He would be trying his best to get the woman he wants!..."
"There is just one woman that I care about...and she has a chewing gum that won't give me a chance to do anything..."
Zell looked at him surprised.
"What?Aren't you talking about...",started Zell.
"Quistis,"afirmed Selphie.
"Quistis...yes,the light of my day,the moon among my stars...Quistis Trepe...but I see that she is a serious woman now!With that...Coronel..."
"Coronel Gabriel...what a jerk...",complained Zell,"I still don't understand why Quistis got involved with this guy..."
"So,you dont't like him..."
"How we could?He acts as he is perfect,as he is THE Galbadia Coronel...he called me...annoying...do you believe that?",said Selphie.
"Well,he already has fans.I never liked him...since we were just boys he always envied me because I am...more handsome than him..."
Selphie smiled:
"We can't let Quistis marry this jerk..."
"Yes...he is not good to her.She is out of her mind..."
Selphie looked at Quistis and Gabriel's direction and said:
"Hey!I have an idea!"
"What idea?",both Irvine and Zell asked.
"You need to talk with Quistis alone,don't you?So...if you listen to me...you'll be able to talk to her,without preocupation..."
"Well...and how will I do it?"
"It's very easy..."

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"Coronel?Can I talk to you for a minute?",asked Selphie behind him.
The Coronel was talking with some people,by Quistis' side.They were in front of a huge curtain that Selphie put there to separate the ballroom from the lifts.Cid complained about it,saying that it was too dark and that there was no need to keep too different ambients.But she told him that it would be there just for the party,and,as soon as the party was over,she would remove it.She never imagined that her idea would have a purpose...
"Yes,Selphie?",he answered turning to her.
"Is that...I have a doubt about some things...I wanted to ask you about the Galbadia army...I wanted to take part of the army,but Cid told me that it is very hard..."
Gabriel got interest on Selphie.He said an 'excuse me' to the people who he was talking to and turned to her,giving her his attention.Quistis,who was still talking with other three people,looked to Selphie with some curiosity.She knew that Selphie didn't like Gabriel and thought that her interest was strange...but,anyway,she decided that it should be normal and didn't give more attention to her.
"Yes,it is very hard,"Gabriel answered,"if you really want to enter,you must pass under a selection made by Galbadia Garden Committe.And after this..."
Selphie heard his words impatiently.She had a cup of wine on her hands,and was just expecting the right moment to act.Her eyes were fixed on the corridor that leaded to the lifts.
"...and after that,you'll need training.It's a harder training than that one you had on Balamb..."
Selphie sighed.She looked to the corridor and saw Zell waving to her.She smiled and turned her eyes to Gabriel,who was still talking.He was so distracted that he didn't even realise that she was turning her glass over him.
Slowly the wine fell over his beautiful Galbadia uniform.He jumped and Selphie tried her best to apologise:
"Oh,Coronel!I'm so sorry!I didn't mean...I'm so..."
"Oh,shit!My uniform...the wine will not disappear!"
"I can take you to the laundry...maybe they have something to take off this..."
"All right,all right..."
Gabriel followed Selphie into the building.Quistis looked to that scene confused.Was it her impression,or Selphie really dropped the wine over him?
She said an 'excuse me' to the people in front of her and walked towards the direction Selphie went,but as she passed by the curtain,she felt a hand on her wrist and suddenly someone pulled her from behind the curtain.
She was ready to shout and jump when she faced Irvine:
"Kinneas?But...what's happening?"
"Sorry,I didn't want to frighten you...I just wanted to talk with you..."
"But Gabriel..."
"Don't worry about him...he will be busy."
Quistis stared at him surprised:
"Don't you tell me that...you and Selphie..."
"Well...it was the only way I found to talk to you..."
"Kinneas...it's not a good time and place to talk..."
"But I need.There is so much I need to tell you..."
She sighed:
"What do you want to tell me?"
Irvine scratched his head and tried to find the words.He didn't want to ruin everything saying stupid things.She loved him,he was sure.But there was something inside of her that he knew he needed to reach and touch,but just if she let him.He felt a bruise on her eyes,everytime they talked seriuosly,or everytime he tried to.And now,by the way she tried to escape from him,he knew that there was a problem between them...something that she didn't find on Gabriel...
"So?I must go,Kinneas...",Quistis' voice brought him back to reality.
"No,wait!Quistis...I...am sorry for everything I said to you last time..."
"You don't need to apologise.I was drunk...I also said stupid things..."
"No.It was not your fault...it's my fault.I went away and let things as they were...I did not care about what you felt,I thought about me,and my feelings...but I suffered because of it...and really suffered..."
"I'm not understanding you..."
"Quistis...I know you must think that I am a conquer,a man that can't be loyal to a woman...and I really never was.But now...now,I know that I want to be loyal and sincere to someone,for the first time in my life...I didn't deny it,I'm not afraid about it,I really like it...because this feeling makes me happy,and I was never so complete before...I think I always looked for so many women because I was empty.I didn't even realise that I was looking for something,but I was.And suddenly,I felt something I never proved before...something I couldn't explain,but I didn't feel the necessity of looking for other women...you know since I went away,I didn't sleep with any other woman?"
Quistis looked at him with a stunned expression.
"You know why Quistis?"
"Why?",she whispered.
"Because I didn't feel anything for other woman.And there was just one woman I wanted..."
She remained in silence,stunned.
"Quistis...I love you..."
She closed her eyes in despair:
"No,Kinneas...please..."
He touched her shoulders and forced her to face him:
"Quistis?..."
She repelled him and said,turning his back to him:
"Are you kidding with me?What do you expect me to say?'I do love you,Kinneas,let's be happy?'...no.I don't believe in it!And I don't believe in you!And in nothing that deals with my feelings...I want peace,a quiet life...not love."
"What are you talking about,Quistis?What happened to you?You don't even seem that woman I knew some time ago,a woman worried about her freinds,fighting for your dreams..."
"It was not my dream.It was something bigger than me..."
"Don't tell me that!Don't tell me you don't have feelings...look at me!"
Irvine took her hands and turned her,forcing her to face him:
"Don't tell me you don't love me...don't lie to me!Don't lie to yourself!You can't be like this,I know you're not like this!"
"And what do you know about me anyway?What do you know?",she said with tears on her eyes.
"Quistis..."
She just stared there,trying to clean her face.
"You come here after two bloody years and tell me that you love me,tell me that you are a better man because you love me,as this love is really something important for us!But it's not!And you know why?I know men like you,you just found an objective to distract your empty life...conquer me is a way you found to have some fun!But I have a life here,I can't give up of everything because you came here and told me to do!Love,love,love!What is love about anyway?Pain,sadness,deception...I don't want this,and I don't want you!I can't want you...'
"What is the problem anyway?Why always resignation and acceptance?Did Balamb Garden teach you to receive what life brings to you and not fight for what is really worth?Or did you learn it on SeeD?"
She stared at him,her eyes full of pain:
"You would never understand...you are a dreamer..."
He touched her shoulders and felt her resistance melt,as she calmed down her breathing and didn't ran away from him.
"I'm not a dreamer...I love you,that's all...I'm just fighting for my rights...please,please,please...believe me...I love you..."
She faced him and stared at his blue eyes.They looked so sad,but so true...nothing in the world would make her believe that he was lying on that right moment.
She closed her eyes and threw herself into his arms.Irvine touched her hair and closed his eyes.He felt her still crying on his chest,her breathing calming down.
"Quistis..."
They had no time to further explanations.A voice broke their trance,and soon,as they were woking up from a dream,Gabriel face's stared at them,furious.
Quistis felt Gabriel pulling her,and his voice seemed dominated by a wave of an uncontrable rage:
"I really believe that you have an explanation..."
"Gabriel...we were just talking..."
"I see.You are really good friends aren't you?Or Mr.Kinneas here has a better explanation to give me?"
Irvine sighed impatiently:
"Quistis answered.We were talking.You should not be jealous...Quistis is the most honest woman I know...but I guess you don't see it.It's a pity..."
"You'll never change,will you Irvine?Always the same thing...since we studied together you always tried to push me down,to be better...you just chose the way you'd live your life,and today you are what you are.Nothing.Always surrounded by women that never cared about you;in reality they were using you as you used them...isn't it?And now,what do you have?I'll tell you...for not ending alone,you'll stick together with any woman that says yes to you and live a life of emptiness..."
Irvine smiled ironically:
"That's what you think?And you think you'll have a perfect life with Quistis?Ha,ha...you know what?She loves ME!That's why she is marring YOU!Because I'm not good enough to her...so she prefers being unhappy by your side...but happiness...no,you can't make her happy!And you don't deserve her...she is too good for you too..."
"Quistis does not love you...she would never get involved with someone like you,would you Quistis?"
She sighed:
"Why don't we forget everything and go back to..."
"He is not right,is he?"
"Gabriel..."
"I can't believe it...and it's all your fault,Kinneas!Always,your fault..."
"Please,Gabriel...",tried Quistis.
"I knew someday we would met...I'm tired of you...tired!And it's time for us to finish this problem once for all.I guess we both have reasons to agree with a final solution..."
"I agree..."
"This time,I won't let you get in my way...what you think?A shooter and a Coronel...you can choose your gun..."
"What are you talking about?Won't you do this,will you?For such a stupid thing!",tried Quistis.
"You should not interfere,Quistis.It's personal,"said Irvine.
"So,we'll met tomorrow morning,before everybody wake up...on the Cave of Fire..."
"No!Don't do this!Please,Kinneas!It's craziness!"
"Worried about him?",asked Gabriel.
Quistis faced him:
"Can't you see it's craziness?You'll hurt each other!"
"Don't worry about me,Quistis...I'm the best shooter in the world..."
Irvine smiled to her and turned to the lift.Quistis called him once more,but Irvine just smiled to her again and entered.
Quistis turned to Gabriel and said:
"Please,Gabriel,don't do this!You're so responsible,you can't do this!Please..."
"It's decided,Quistis.I won't let him take you from me..."
"Don't say stupid things...I don't love him,I..."
"Don't justify yourself.I know what you feel...I'm just trying to protect you...I'll come back to the party...excuse me..."
Gabriel went to the ballroom and left Quistis alone,behind the curtain.

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"So...we arrived,Quistis.It was really a wonderful night...",Gabriel said as they arrived in front of Quistis room.
She sighed and said:
"I hope when you lay your head on your pillow you can think better and realise that you're doing a stupid thing..."
Gabriel approached her and said:
"Don't worry about it.We have...so much better things to do..."
Quistis put her hands on his chest to stop him:
"I'm tired.I need sleeping..."
"I see...that's okay.I'll have to wait for some days then...I'm patient.Have a good night..."
Gabriel turned and walked through the corridor until disappears from Quistis' sight.She just sighed and closed her eyes.
She never felt so confused in her entire life...

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