Note: The is the way I would have liked to see Carl return to Bay City. Not an amnesiac that stumbled upon Rachel at the Florida bungalow but a man returned to his family through the sheer force of the love he shared with Rachel.

The story begins roughly six months after Carl's disappearance, shortly after Amanda returned from Boca Linda.

Cory and Elizabeth have been SORAS’ed a few years and are now six years old.

Rachel was unsure which of them needed the comfort of the other more. They had both been very alone since Carl died. Although she was very young when it happened Elizabeth had carried a solemnity and emptiness with her since the death of her father. Rachel tried to fill the gap in her young daughter’s life but she felt the same emptiness.

"Ryan, is that you? Ryan?"

"Relax Rachel, it’s me. I can’t stay. This, appearing, takes a lot out of me. I have something I need to tell you."

"Ryan, why didn’t you bring Carl with you? I need to see him. I need him. I’m sorry Ryan, its wonderful to see you, but…"

"I understand Rachel, I know how much he means to you, and you to him, that’s why I’m here. I didn’t bring Carl because he’s not here, not with me."

"What do you mean, ‘not with you’?" Not at this moment, not on that side, God, don’t tell me he’s,…you know, there."

"Rachel I don’t know anything about ‘there’ but I mean Carl’s not dead. He needs you, now more than ever. Rachel I can’t stay. You have to believe me. Carl needs you. Tell Vicky I love her. Don’t worry. I’m watching out for Elizabeth and Cory. How I wish I could know them.

I don’t regret anything Rachel. It’s wonderful here. Everything is love and peace, no pain, nothing to fear. Be strong Rachel. I love you all."

"Ryan! Ryan! don’t go."

Rachel woke with a start. Elizabeth was still sleeping peacefully in the bed beside her. Had it all been just a dream. But, it couldn’t be. Was it real? Carl, alive? As much a Rachel hoped and dreamed that Carl was alive she know it was impossible, she'd spread his ashes in Key West. Still, she had a nagging feeling that something about his death wasn't right. She'd never felt the finality that had been such a part of Mac's death.

She couldn't let herself think this way. But she had to. In Carl's darkest times Ryan had appeared to him. It always brought Carl a sense of peace. Now Rachel knew she had to place her faith in Ryan once again. Whether it made sense or not Carl needed her to take a chance on him one last time.

The next morning, when Rachel returned from taking Elizabeth and Cory to school, she found Amanda at the desk going over the Brava distribution figures. She hesitated before telling Amanda about her dream, and her decision to search for Carl.

Putting on the bravest face she could muster Rachel strode into the living room.

"Amanda, I have something to tell you. I hope you’ll be supportive but given our recent history I won’t be surprised if you’re not."

"Mom, how could you say such a thing? I’ve tried to be nothing but helpful and supportive since Carl’s death."

"Yes, Amanda, you have been a big help to the twins and me, but I don’t think you’re going to like what I have to say. It’s even a bit surprising to me. You see I have a nagging feeling that everything with Carl isn’t settled. I just can’t accept his death and move forward with my life."

Rachel walked to the balcony and looked out over the grounds, taking a minute to steel herself for Amanda’s reaction. " I’ve decided to take a little time off from Cory and investigate Carl’s death more thoroughly. I want to put to rest all the questions about his health, the missing money, why he hired Scott Gutherie, if he ever actually knew Scott. I want everything settled once and for all."

Amanda looked up from her work for a moment. "Mom. I think that sounds like a great idea. I’d hire a private detective, maybe Cameron. But if you want to do this yourself I’ll only support you. Take some time, go to the Keys, spend some extra time with Elizabeth and Cory, do whatever it takes to get Carl out of your system for good. And, if you find the money that will only be a bonus."

"Amanda, I don’t think you understand. I’m going to be investigating everything surrounding Carl’s death. I think there’s more to it than we ever guessed. I think Carl may still be alive."

Amanda immediately stopped going over the figures and looked up at Rachel. "Well, Mom, of course you know that’s ridiculous. I mean even if he did survive the hospital fire Scott said he died in a plane crash over the Keys."

"Scott told you? When would Scott have told you anything about Carl?"

"In Boca Lynda, while he was holding me hostage Scott talked about a lot of things, different things that didn’t really make very much sense to me at the time."

"Amanda do you mean to tell me that Scott told you Carl survived the fire? He told you this in Boca Lynda? Why didn’t you tell me when you got back? Why am I only finding out about this now!"

"Mom, it was over. Scott told me Carl died in a plane explosion. I was exhausted when I got back and thought it best not to bother you with the details. And by the time I did think about telling you so much time had passed I didn’t think it mattered anyway. And then later I didn’t want you to be upset because I had waited to tell you.

The end result is the same. Carl is dead."

Rachel ran her hand through her hair as a look of disbelief spread across her face. "I can’t believe this. All this time and you never said anything. Amanda I have never been ashamed of you until now. You know very well that your decision not to tell me was solely motivated by your hatred of Carl and fear that he might re-enter our lives. Your selfishness knows no bounds."

Amanda got up and walked to Rachel. Amanda put both of her hands on Rachel’s shoulders and looked into her face. "Mom, don’t be ridiculous. If I had thought it was important I would certainly have told you about what Scott said. But why should we believe anything he said. Everything about him was a lie. Besides, have you stopped to think that if Scott did know what Carl was up to that means Carl was trying to get out of Bay City, that he is responsible for the lost money, and that your marriage was over?"

Rachel brushed Amanda’s hands off of her shoulders and moved to pour herself a glass of water. "Amanda, I'm not going to go into this with you right now. What we do know for certain at this point is that you knew, or at least had reason to believe, that Carl survived the hospital explosion, and rather than share that with me and possibly spare me months of pain and sorrow you selfishly kept it to yourself. I don't want to talk to you about this anymore." Rachel began to pace the living room. Several times she moved to say something but stopped herself in mid sentence. Finally she looked at Amanda.

"I would appreciate it if you would move into one of the Cory corporate apartments in the Towers for awhile. I don't think I can handle dealing with you right now and I don’t relish the idea of weeks of icy silence between us."

Putting the distribution papers into her briefcase. "Whatever you want Mom. But I want you to know that I don't regret for a moment keeping this from you. I'm convinced it was the right thing to do."

Rachel went to leave the room but suddenly turned around to face Amanda. "It must be wonderful to live in a world of such certainty because right now nothing in my life is certain."

As Amanda went upstairs to pack Rachel walked out onto the patio. Almost instantly questions about Carl’s death and the events of the months and weeks preceding it began to overwhelm her.

Rachel looked out toward the lake. "Ryan, honey if you’re out there, please help me with this, keep me strong, be the support my own children will never be. Maybe our love will be enough to finally give Carl peace, whatever the truth may be."

After Amanda had left for the office, taking a suitcase with her, Rachel sat down at the desk in the living room and began to think about what she had learned today. Her thoughts were scattered but slowly she began to understand what had to be done.

If Carl did survive the fire he had to have left Bay City almost immediately afterwards. In his condition Carl must have left town via air. She had to start somewhere and the logical place was to begin was with the Bay City airport.

Rachel hadn’t felt so alone since Ada had died. There didn’t seem to be anyone she could turn to or rely on so she decided to begin the detective work on her own. Maybe eventually she would hire someone to help her or ask Joe for some advice but for the time being that this had to be a one-woman operation.

Rachel wasn’t in the habit of using her name or wealth to get what she wanted and she was surprised at how quickly the airport clerk turned over the flight manifests for the night of the fire. If Scott was being honest with Amanda Carl had left Bay City almost immediately for Florida. The logical place to start was with any and all flights leaving Bay City the night of the hospital explosion.

As she opened the oversized book the airport attendant had given her Rachel was aware for the first time how little she knew about the events surrounding Carl’s death. She had accepted without question Joe’s explanation of the events of that night. Now, for the first time since she’d asked Joe to see Carl’s body Rachel began to confront the horror that was the night Carl died.

The manifest log looked like a foreign language to Rachel. Although she spent the entire night poring over the book she got nowhere.

The next morning Rachel called Jim Whorton, the Cory pilot to ask him for help in deciphering the manifest log. He explained the basics of how the book was organized to Rachel without asking any questions. He had been working for the Cory’s too long to be surprised by anything they did, or anywhere they went for that matter.

After poring over the flight manifests Rachel came to the conclusion that there had been no direct flights to Florida. Rachel hadn’t expected the search to be easy. She knew Carl too well to think that he wouldn’t do everything possible to conceal his flight path.

After several more hours Rachel found a plane leaving Bay City and taking a circuitous route to the Keys. It carried a supply of oxygen and a flight nurse. It had to be Carl. If she believed Scott, and Ryan, Rachel knew Carl had made it to Florida.

It would be much more difficult to track his movements from the Keys. She had no idea if Carl was still under medical care, if he was driven or flown, where he was headed. Rachel didn’t know where to start but she knew she had to find Carl on her own. There was no one she could trust to help her with this. But, maybe she could find someone to help her develop a plan for her search.

"Officer Burrell, Toni, do you have a minute to answer a few questions?

"Certainly Mrs. Hutchins but are you sure you wouldn't rather talk to Captain Carlino?"

"No, no, I think it's better if we keep Joe out of this for the moment. I'd like to ask you a few questions about how to conduct a search for a person. Do you have to tell Joe about what we discuss? I don't want to put you in an awkward position."

"If you just want to ask a few questions about methodology and stuff like that there's no reason why I should even need to tell Joe we talked."

"Great, I really appreciate it. What I need to know is how you would go about searching for a missing person assuming all you have to go on is the last place they were."

"How long has this person been missing?"

"About 7 months."

"Well, the trail is going to be pretty cold. Let's start from the beginning."

After several more phone calls and more than a little computer work Rachel felt that she now knew at least what the next step should be in her search for Carl.

For the first time since Carl's death Rachel felt a sense of hope, and found her days exciting once again. She couldn't wait to move forward on her search for Carl.

If Carl did fly to the Keys did it make sense for him to stay at their bungalow? He was still very weak after the shooting and may have needed a place he knew was too remote to attract very much attention but where he knew he would be able to spend a few days regaining his strength.

With nothing to lose Rachel placed a call to Jose Garcia, the groundskeeper in the Keys.

"Jose, Como esta?"

"Muy bien senora, y usted y los ninos. Vengan aqui?"

"We're all fine Jose. No, no we can't come down at the moment, the kids have school. I'm calling because I have a question only you can answer."

"Mrs. Hutchins you know I'll do anything I can to be of help. What do you need to know?"

"Do you remember anyone visiting last April, towards the end of the month?"

"Of course, Mr. Hutchins brother, what was his name? I remember he didn't go by Hutchins."

"Might it have been Scott, Scott Gutherie?"

"Yes, yes that does sound familiar. I don't really remember very much about him. He was only here overnight but the group he came with stayed for about a week. I'm afraid I can't tell you very much about them."

"Do you remember who was in the group, how many were there, was there a doctor or nurse in the group?"

"I'm sorry I can't tell you. I'm surprised you don't already know. Didn't they check with you before they came down?"

"No, unfortunately I didn't know they were headed down and now I need to know who was in the group and how long they stayed."

"Well, I can tell you that they stayed for a week. Other than that I don't know much. I met with Mr. Hutchins' brother, made sure he had everything he needed and he told me not to come back for a week. I assumed he had a lady friend with him and wanted some privacy but then he mentioned he would be returning to Bay City.

I hope it's o.k. that I didn't check back. He was adamant that they wanted to be left alone."

"Jose whatever you think best is fine, I trust your judgment. Can you remember anything at all about where the group may have been headed or any special requests they had, anything at all that was unusual or stood out in your memory?"

"There is one thing I do remember, something a little strange. They had one of those oxygen delivery vans stopping by the bungalow every day."

"Delivery van, what do you mean?"

"You know, a medical supply van."

"It stopped by the bungalow everyday?"

"Near as I could tell. You know how my house sits just off the road. Well, there's nothing past my house except your house. I just assumed they were delivering to the bungalow."

"Thank you Jose, you've been very helpful."

"Anytime Mrs. Hutchins. Hope it helps. Give mijos un beso."

"Gracias Jose. Buenas Nochas."

Now Rachel knew for sure that Scott had taken Carl to the Keys. The trick would be to figure out where they went when they left the bungalow.

The hunt would have to wait. Right now Cory and Elizabeth had to get to their horseback riding lessons and then she had promised them a trip to the library before they were expected at Joe and Paulina's for dinner.

It wasn't until the next morning, after she'd dropped Cory and Elizabeth off at school, that Rachel was able to formulate her plan for the next part of her search. She began to search for Carl's exit from Florida as she did his exit from Bay City, with the manifest logs from the airport closest to the bungalow.

Now that she knew how to read the manifest logs things went much quicker.

It began to dawn on Rachel that Carl couldn't be planning his moves. Throughout his life Carl had been disappearing successfully and completely. The flight from Bay City had been too easy to trace. The oxygen tanks and flight nurses too obvious of a give-away to his presence on the plane.

Suddenly Rachel was hit with a horrible thought. Is it possible that Carl didn't leave of his own decision but was taken out of town and was being held against his will? His shooting had never been solved. What if the shooter realized he failed to kill Carl and took him away?

At that moment Rachel's search took on a new sense of urgency.

After the flight logs failed to reveal any useful information Rachel began the tedious task of calling every car rental, chauffeur service, taxi and medical transport company servicing the area in and around the Keys.

She eliminated anyone that didn't have van service under the assumption that Carl would still be too weak to sit for a long ride only a week after being shot. Thanks to Jose she was also able to narrow the time they left the bungalow to a twelve-hour time span.

With everything she had to go on Rachel was able to locate a medical transport company that had transported Carl from the Keys to the Miami airport. From there they got very sloppy. The private plane they hired out of Miami was in Scott's name. One more reason to fear for Carl's safety.

The moment Rachel saw the flight manifest for Scott’s chartered plane she felt a little ridiculous. Of course that's where Carl was, New York. To think of Carl in New York also gave Rachel a little peace of mind. If Carl had a choice that's where he would be, where he wooed her, where they shared their first kiss, where they were free to love each other away from the prying, disapproving eyes of her family.

Unfortunately the trail seemed to turn stone cold at La Guardia. That only reaffirmed Rachel's gut feeling that Carl was somewhere in or near New York City.

Where did they go after the airport? They could be anywhere in the city, apartment, brownstone, hotel, motel or even a hospital. It didn’t help any to remember that she was trying to track down information that was months old. It was hardly likely that a desk clerk would remember renting a room to Scott or Carl after all those months.

After days of doing almost nothing but searching for Carl Rachel began to feel guilty for neglecting Cory and Elizabeth and failing to keep up her end of the business at Cory. She put everything regarding her search for Carl aside for a full week. She played Mom Chauffeur for Cory and Elizabeth. Taking them and picking them up from school. Running Elizabeth to the store to shop for a birthday present for Rebecca Lahti’s party and making sure Cory had a helmet and pads to wear while riding his new skateboard.

She'd also come to a dead-end once her search reached New York. The thought of searching every suite and room in the city was more than a little overwhelming. While hiring a private investigator was an option it was not one that Rachel was anxious to exercise.

Unfortunately, it was beginning to look more and more necessary. After randomly calling New York area hospitals and asking whether Carl Hutchins had been a patient last April or May and being told either there was no one under that name or that they couldn't give out that information she decided on a different tactic.

With Toni's help Rachel was able to get copies of the admitting lists from most of the New York area hospitals. After a few days spent going over them she was beginning to despair of ever finding anything that would be of help in her search for Carl.

Sitting in the living room with the twins doing their reading, Elizabeth snuggled up on one side of her and Cory laying across the other side of the couch with his feet resting in her lap, Rachel was going over the last of the hospital admitting forms.

"Mom, what does w-a-r-l-o-c-k spell?"

"Warlock, its a male witch. What'ya reading Core?"

"Harry Potter. Beth talked me into reading it. It's pretty good so far."

"Well, I'm glad you've found a book you like. You know you’ll only improve your reading by practicing."

"Yeah, I know Mom. I'd read a lot more if I could just find more interesting stuff to read. If I like this book there's a lot more of them to read."

"And Miss Elizabeth, what are you reading so intently?"

"Encyclopedia Brown, Boy Detective. I'm trying to solve the mystery."

"Like Mother, like daughter. I hope your having more success than I am."

"What do you mean Mom?" Elizabeth looked up at her Mom.

"Well, I have a little mystery of my own that I'm trying to solve. If I'm able to get to the bottom of it I'll tell you all about it, but right now I'm stuck and thinking I may never be able to solve it."

"I hope you solve it Mom."

"Thanks honey, me too."

A few minutes later Rachel practically jumped off of the couch, almost pushing Elizabeth to the floor in the process.

"Oh my God, my gosh, EUREKA!!!"

In unison the twins asked "What is it Mom, did you solve the mystery?"

"You bet I did honey, and the answer to my riddle is Ryan Davis. I can't believe I didn't think of it before. Of course he wouldn't be using his own name, but he'd want a special name. Could he be hoping I'd find him?"

"Whose Ryan Davis?"

"Core, if I'm right Ryan Davis is the most wonderful man in the world. And the answer to our dreams."

After a few phone calls to insure Paulina could watch the kids, that everything was under control at Cory and Loretta had room for an old friend, Rachel was on her way to New York.

It was only once she was on the plane that Rachel was able to consider the ramifications of where Carl was. Sloan Kettering was world renowned for their cancer research, but Carl had a gunshot wound. It could only mean that their fears for Carl's health that spring had been well -founded. If that was the case Rachel had no idea in what condition she would find Carl. She was certain of one thing, regardless of the condition he was in she wanted to bring him home, to take care of him, to love him for as long as they had.

Walking into Loretta's beauty shop was almost like coming home. It was one of the most comfortable places in the world as far as Rachel was concerned.

"Rachel! It's so wonderful to see you. Come in, sit down and tell me what you’re doing in town, especially without the twins. I can't remember the last time I saw you without your surveillance team. I was looking forward to seeing those two. They're as full as fun and fire as their parents."

"Oh Loretta, it's so good to see you." As Rachel walked across the floor to embrace Loretta she began to weep. "I can't tell you how much I've been looking forward to seeing you, to being in New York again."

"Now honey, you've been in the city and spent quite a bit of time with me. What's so different now? Why the tears?"

"I guess I'm just feeling a little lonely, missing Carl. Loretta, I can't tell you very much about my visit now. I'm afraid it sounds a little far-fetched, but if it turns out like I hope everything will be wonderful. Better than we ever could have hoped."

"Let's get you settled. Let me help you up the stairs with these and then I'll get things cleaned up down here and then we'll spend all night talking and sharing secrets like schoolgirls."

"That sounds wonderful. I've been needing to talk to you, a chance to forget about everything back home and concentrate on what I need to get done here."

The next morning Rachel was up and at Sloan Kettering before the volunteers at the information desk were able to get the computers up and running. For Rachel, sure she was close to finding Carl, the delay seemed interminable.

Finally the elder woman in the pink lab coat looked up and said, "I'm sorry to keep you waiting miss. What was the patient’s name?"

""I'm trying to find some information on a patient Ryan Davis, but I think he was a patient back in..."

Before Rachel could finish explaining that Carl, under his assumed name, would have been a patient months ago the volunteer spoke up.

"Yes, here it is. Mr. Davis is a patient up in the ICU. Are you a family member?"

"Yes, I'm his wife."

"Well Mrs. Davis, I don't know if their ready for visitors just yet but if you'll take the second bank of elevators up to the eighth floor the ICU is behind the double doors in front of the elevator."

Rachel replied in a whisper. "Thank you."

Rachel almost collapsed once she reached the elevator. She'd never expected that Carl would still be in the hospital, and certainly not in the ICU. It was now almost October and Carl left Bay City in April. My God, Rachel thought, what was going on with Carl? It was all moving too fast now.

Suddenly Rachel was gripped with the fear that this was all wrong. Carl couldn’t be so sick that he would have spent the last six months in the hospital, in ICU. She began to grasp at any shred of hope she could find. It was a mistake. Carl was dead and this Ryan Davis would be just that, a man, not Carl, who coincidentally had a name that shared a link to Carl.

When the elevator doors opened Rachel didn't move. For a split second she considered not getting off, of turning around and going to get a cup of coffee, of running back to Bay City. It took her only a moment to toss that idea aside, walk off the elevator and through the ICU doors.

The ICU was a large, round nurse’s station surrounded by ten small rooms made entirely of glass. The nurses, and any visitors, had a clear view into each of the rooms. Some of the patients, or their families, had tried to gain a degree of privacy by drawing the thin curtains to obscure the bed from view.

After one quick scan of the rooms Rachel was approached by a nurse, according to her name tag, Webber, RN

"Can I help you?"

"Yes, I'm looking for my husband. The downstairs desk told me he was here in the ICU."

"And your husband’s name."

"Ryan Davis."

The nurse immediately looked up from her computer and looked Rachel in the eye.

"You're Mrs. Davis?"

"Yes, well, actually there's an interesting story there. You see Mr. Davis is registered under an assumed name...."

"I thought there must be some kind of story there." The nurse said with more than a hint of sarcasm in her voice. " It would take a pretty incredible story to keep anyone who loved that man from visiting him for months at a time. You see Mr. Davis has been with us for quite awhile. Needless to say he's acquired more than a few fans up here and we're more than a little protective of him."

"I understand that. Actually, you could say I'm his biggest fan. I'm sorry, I don’t mean to be impatient but I haven't seen my husband for quite some time and I'm more than a little anxious to see him, how he's doing, and to get him back to our family."

"If you'll just wait here a moment Mrs. ...?"

"Mrs. Hutchins, Rachel Hutchins."

Nurse Webber walked into one of the ICU rooms and approached another woman in a lab coat. After a few minutes of fairly heated conversation and plenty of gesturing Rachel's way both women approached Rachel.

"Mrs. Hutchins, I'm Doctor Dolores Sanchez. I hope you can understand that we're in a difficult position here. We have a strict visitation policy, family only. Mr. Davis, and that is the name of the patient we have here in the ICU, and have had in the oncology unit as well for several months, does not have any family members listed on his visitation form. Now that's not the problem, we can by-pass the visitation list. The problem is that we have no indication at all that you are any relation to Mr. Davis, other than your word. In order to protect Mr. Davis and ourselves, we're going to have to put a call into our legal affairs department to make sure that your visiting with Mr. Davis is in tune with his wishes."

Barely able to contain her frustration Rachel struggled to maintain her composure. "I apologize for the difficulty this situation has caused you but wouldn't it be easier to simply ask Mr. Davis if he would agree to my visit rather than get lawyers involved?"

"I'm sorry ma'am, I thought Carol had told you. I shouldn't give any of Mr. Davis' medical information to you, but I think you need to know. Mr. Davis is heavily sedated, he's not in a position to answer anyone's questions."

"What do you mean heavily sedated." By now Rachel was so nervous she was almost screaming. "He's my husband, I have a right to know what his condition is, why is he here?"

Dr. Sanchez let Rachel finish speaking and then looked up from the patient’s chart she held in her hands."Ma'am, please try to maintain your composure or I'm afraid I'll have to call for security to escort you out of ICU. Please consider the welfare of our patients and their visitors."

Almost immediately Rachel calmed down. "I'm sorry, please, if you could just let me see him you may be able to save all of us this unpleasantness. Or, I have his picture, here see." Rachel pulled a family photo of herself and Carl with the twins from her wallet. "If you could just tell me if this is Mr. Davis. This is me and my husband with our children. The photo is about a year old but surely you can see I'm his family."

Doctor Sanchez let out a sigh. "Mrs. Hutchins, you can show me all the photos in the world but I must follow hospital policy. These patients are very ill. We can't have just anyone traipsing in and out of the unit. Please just take a seat and as soon as I can get this settled we'll let you know."

In tears now and reaching the point of exasperation Rachel let out a sigh. "Please, just let me see him, peak in the window. My God, I've been looking for him for months, I thought he was dead, please."

In a voice bordering on yelling Dr. Sanchez replied. "Mrs. Hutchins, please just settle down, and relax, take a moment to compose yourself and I'll get in touch with administration immediately."

Dr. Sanchez let out a sigh and turned to the nurse. "I’m going to my office, let me know if administration or legal call."

After about thirty minutes of sitting and waiting Rachel had had enough. "Excuse me, nurse, could you tell me where the nearest pay phone is?"

"Yes ma'am, just outside the double doors."

Within minutes Rachel was on the phone back to Bay City. "Cass, I need your help. I'm at Sloan Kettering and I think I may have found Carl. Yes, he's alive. Cass, the problem is that he's been checked into the hospital under an assumed name and because of that they won't let me in to see him. Cass, I don't know what you can do but right now I'm waiting for the legal and administrative people here to let me see him. Please Cass, whatever you can do, I need your help."

Back in his office Cass was up and pacing the floor as he listened to Rachel on the speaker phone. "Rachel, you'll understand that this is throwing me for a loop. I didn't even know there was a possibility that Carl was still alive. I'll call Sloan Kettering and find out what they need to let you into his room. Give me the number where I can reach you and I'll be right back with you."

After another hour spent waiting Rachel had reached the end of her patience. Getting up from her chair she began to walk slowly around the nurse's station, without making a move toward any of the rooms. Initially Nurse Webber kept hawk-like watch on Rachel, determined to keep her from getting anywhere near Carl. After a few rounds of the nurse's station Rachel sat back down and felt a little defeated. She slumped a little in the chair and, cradling her head in her hands, slowly began to weep.

Quietly another nurse approached Rachel's chair. "You must be Rachel."

Rachel quickly sat up in the chair and looked at the young nurse who had approached her. "Yes, my name is Rachel, but how did you know?"

"He, your husband, frequently called for you in his sleep. When I asked him about you later he said that you were the love of his life but circumstances prevented you from being with him. It upset him too much to talk about you very often but when he did it was obvious he loved you very much."

Rachel began to openly sob now. "I can't tell you what it means to me to have you say that. More than anything else I needed to know that right now."

"Mrs. Hutchins, if you can wait just a little longer. The shift change is in about 45 minutes and when both Doctor Sanchez and Nurse Webber are gone I'll see what I can do to get you in to see your husband."

"I can't tell you what that means to me. Thank you."

As the nurse walked away Rachel realized she would need some help to get through the next few hours.

"Loretta, can you please get down to Sloan Kettering as soon as possible, the eighth floor, ICU."

"Honey, are you all right?"

"I'll explain everything to when you get down here. What you need to know right now is that I've found Carl and he's alive. He's here at the hospital and hopefully I'll be able to see him in a little bit. I need some help here. I'll need a shoulder to lean on."

"Say no more, I'm on my way."

"Thank you Loretta."

As Rachel watched the day shift prepare to leave she couldn't help but get excited. Before she left Doctor Sanchez stopped to talk to Rachel.

"Mrs. Hutchins, I've talked to administration and they are working on trying to get you in to see Mr. Davis as soon as possible. I hope you understand our reticence to let you into his room. We've all become very fond of Mr. Davis and only want what's best for him."

Rachel stood and shook the doctor’s hand. "Yes, of course doctor. My husband has a way of charming everyone he meets. I apologize for my behavior earlier. It’s been a stressful day for everyone. I only hope the situation can be resolved quickly. Good night."

As the doctor and Nurse Webber stood waiting for the elevator Rachel could hear them whispering about her, about her abandonment of Carl. It was infuriating, their self-righteousness. When the elevator doors finally opened Loretta came bounding off, nearly running over the doctor in the process. It was the first time Rachel had managed to crack a smile all day.

"Rachel, what's the news, is it really him, our silver haired fox?"

"Yes, Loretta it's really him, can you believe it."

"Well what in heaven's name are you doing out here. Let's start knocking on some doors and get you in there with him."

"Loretta, please settle down. I think we should be able to get in to see him in just a bit. I finally have an ally on the inside."

The young night nurse, Claire, came to get Rachel a few minutes after the doctor and Nurse Webber disappeared on the elevator. With a slight smile she called to Rachel. "Mrs. Hutchins, I think I can let you in to see Mr. Davis now."

Loretta looked a little confused by the goings-on. "Rachel who's this Mr. Davis?"

"It's the name Carl's been using, Ryan Davis. The Ryan part is obvious, Davis was my maiden name. Isn't it just like Carl, even when he's trying to run away he keeps holding on to his family."

Just outside of Carl's room Claire turned to Rachel and took her hands. "You need to remember he's been very ill. At the moment he's been heavily sedated in order to keep him asleep, to give him a chance to recover."

"Claire, I need to know, why is he in ICU?"

"Mrs. Hutchins, your husband, is battling a fairly serious case of pneumonia. It's a result of all the time he spent on bed rest following his brain surgery. We started slowly weaning him off of the sedatives this morning. He should be awake within the next twelve hours and then we’ll reassess his condition."

"It was a brain tumor then. When was the surgery?"

"In early May. Following the surgery he underwent physical therapy here at the hospital until August. Because he didn't have any family he stayed here at the hospital longer than is usual. He was still fairly weak after the surgery.

The doctors had no explanation for his slow recovery. Personally I think it was because he was so alone, didn't have anything to live for, nothing pushing him to get better.

Eventually he was discharged and placed in a live-in physical therapy institute. Last week he was re-admitted with the pneumonia. He was sedated day before yesterday to try and give him a chance to recover and to alleviate the pain that he's been experiencing. I hope seeing you, hearing your voice will help him. Are you ready?"

Rachel took hold of Loretta's arm and steeled herself. "Yes, of course, please, I'd like to see him."

One step and there he was. Sleeping peacefully on the hospital bed, his hair flowing around him. He'd grown a beard that made him look something like Moses.

Slowly Rachel walked over to the bed, never taking her eyes off of Carl. Once she reached his bedside the tears began. Tentatively Rachel began to slowly caress his cheek, to feel the warmth of his skin. As she listened to the rhythm of his breathing and watched him Rachel began to cry. She raised his hand to her lips and kissed him. Moving to his forehead she began to cover his faces with kisses. Finally, she gently kissed his lips. She turned to Loretta with a broad grin. "Can you believe its him?"

Looking again at Carl she began to speak to him. "Oh my love, Darling, its me, I’ve found you. Won’t you open your eyes, just for a minute? Loretta’s here."

Suddenly Cass appeared at Carl’s doorway. Making his way past Loretta he blurted out "Rachel I flew straight here as soon as I hung up with you. What do you mean Carl’s......" As Cass turned to look at Carl lying in the hospital bed he stopped dead in his tracks.

"My God, Rachel. I don’t believe it. I mean is that really him, he’s alive?’

"Cass, can you believe it. It’s really him. He’s alive. When I called you I thought there was the possibility it was him but I couldn’t let myself really believe it. He’s here, alive."

"What happened? How did this happen, why did he leave Bay City?"

"Those are the same questions I have but we’ll have to wait for an answer. For right now Cass I need you to keep this between us. I’m sure you can imagine the problems I’m going to have telling Amanda and Matthew Carl’s alive and I’d prefer to wait until Carl’s awake and able to answer some of our questions."

"You can’t mean you’re going to let him back into your life. He’s a danger to you and everyone you love."

"Excuse me," said Loretta as she moved forward into the room and extended her hand to Cass, "I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Loretta Delahanty and I have to disagree with you on that one. Anyone who knows Carl and Rachel knows Carl would do anything in the world to protect her and their children. I think we the least owe Carl is the courtesy of explaining his actions before we start throwing around accusations."

"Thank you Loretta. I think we need to give Cass an opportunity to get used to the idea of Carl as Lazarus. It will take us all some time to get used to. In the meantime I’d like to keep Amanda and Matthew in the dark about this one, for their sake and ours.

As Cass took a seat he really looked at Carl for the first time. "Don’t take this the wrong way honey, but he looks awful. What’s wrong with him, has he been in the hospital since he left Bay City?"

"Claire, Carl’s nurse has been filling us in on his recent medical history. There was a brain tumor, they operated and Carl went through a series of chemotherapy and radiation. He’s been undergoing therapy until recently when he contracted pneumonia and landed back here."

"Do they have a prognosis for him? Is he going to come out of this?"

"The current prognosis is quite hopeful. Currently there’s no sign of the tumor. If he can kick the pneumonia he should be healthy and ready to go home. They’re going to let the sedatives wear off in the hopes that my being here might be the encouragement he needs to fight this thing and get out of here for good."

"For your sake I hope it all works out that way."

"Thanks Cass. I know you still have your reservations about Carl but right now I couldn’t be happier."

After sitting quietly with Rachel for what seemed like hours Cass settled back in his chair, cleared his throat and mumbled, "I guess it’s what we all wish for."

Rachel looked over at Cass from her perch on the side of Carl’s bed. "What’s that Cass?"

"Finding the one you loved and lost, alive. I know the first time I saw Ann O’Donnell I thought Frankie had come back to me. Despite the fact I have been able to mourn Frankie and move on I couldn’t help but hope that Annie was really Frankie brought back to me by some sort of cosmic blessing.

I don’t want to take anything away from you at this moment. Just, just appreciate the tremendous blessing you’ve been given."

As tears welled in Cass’ eyes Rachel got up from the bed and moved to kneel by his chair, gently placing her hand on his knee.

"Cass I don’t know what to say. I’d give anything in the world to save you from the pain of Frankie’s death. To let you be the one to sit here, anxiously waiting for her to wake up. I know the pain, the heartache that never leaves you. As long as you live Frankie will be a part of your life. You’ll never stop wanting to hear her voice or wanting to see her just one last time.

Why don’t you get a room and some sleep. Loretta can drop you anywhere you like or you can stay with her."

With that Loretta piped up. "Sure Cass, I’d love to have a handsome man in my house. It’s nothing fancy mind you but it’s home."

As he wiped away the tears Cass flashed his trademark grin. "Loretta I don’t think I’ve had a nicer offer from a lovely lady in a long time. I could do with a little home time."

Quickly recovering and in lawyer mode Cass turned to Rachel. "Rachel, I’ll stop by in the morning for a quick visit but after that I’m going home to try and see if I can dig up any information on where Carl’s been and what the circumstances of his disappearance were."

"Thanks Cass. At Loretta’s you’ll find a manila envelope labeled "Phoenix" in there you’ll find everything I was able to uncover in my search for him. It should give you a good head start and answer some of your questions.

"Loretta, do you think you could bring me a fresh change of clothes in the morning? I’ll get everything else I need from the gift shop downstairs."

"Sure thing honey. Now you get some rest. The nurse said this chair folds out into a bed. I’ll ask her to bring you in a blanket and pillow."

As she hugged Rachel goodbye Loretta whispered in her ear, "I’m so happy for you honey. No worries, just enjoy the moment."

Rachel sat and watched Carl sleep for hours. Afraid to take her eyes off of him for even a moment, afraid she’d wake from a wonderful dream. As midnight approached she could fight the fatigue no longer.

As she tried to get comfortable in the "bed" provided for her in Carl’s room Rachel heard Carl begin to stir from his sleep. Being careful not to attract the attention of the nurses she got up and stood next to his bed. Very quietly she whispered into Carl’s ear, "I’m here darling, please wake up. I’m so anxious to talk to you again."

As she stood watching him Carl breathed in deeply and began to wake from his medically induced slumber. Rachel watched the movements he made, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand and the slow moan of waking, with rapt attention. Once again she leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Carl’s forehead.

Without opening his eyes Carl lifted his hand to Rachel’s face and a smile slowly spread across his face. In a hoarse voice Carl whispered, "So it’s over then. This is heaven. I’m with my Love again.

"Heaven on earth. Oh love, please open your eyes. I’ve been waiting for you to wake up."

With that Carl slowly opened his eyes. At first sight of Rachel a smile crept across his face. "My heart, it’s really you. How did know?"

Crying now Rachel pulled Carl into her arms. "Of course I found you. Everything in the world was telling me where you were. It was only a matter of opening my eyes to what was all around me."

As she lowered Carl back onto the bed he began to cough uncontrollably. Claire rushed in and began to check his vital signs. Slowly Rachel eased away from the bed.

Seeing how concerned Rachel was Claire talked as she checked the monitors. "Don’t worry he’s likely to have a bit of a cough for a few more days. When he’s a bit more awake we’ll be able to give him an expectorant but right now I want to hold off until we can get a better assessment of his current condition. I’d expect him to fall back to sleep shortly."

As soon as Claire left Carl eased back into the bed and took a drink of water. Rachel stood against the far wall anxiously watching his every move.

Carl also noticed Rachel’s apprehension. Flashing a smile he tried to reassure her. "Don’t worry Rachel. I’ve become quite used to this world of medicine and machines. It’s not nearly as bad as it looks. Why I’ve been resurrected like a latter day Lazarus. Haven’t they told you? I’m a medical miracle saved by the surgeon’s capable hands. Back from the grave to haunt you again."

"Please don’t even joke like that Carl." Almost imperceptibly the tears began. "I was the one left behind. I was the one who laid you in the tomb." Walking toward Carl Rachel lowered her voice. "I don’t ever want to be the widow again, left behind to mourn, alone."

Immediately Carl’s look changed, he had no idea how deep her pain had been. A look of sorrow and compassion covered his face. "Love, I have no intention of ever leaving you again. I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused you. I can’t begin to explain it. But, right now I want to talk about home, the grubs. Come lie down beside me and let’s talk as we lie in each other’s arms. Just like old times."

Rachel began to regret her words almost immediately. Carl’s back, he’s alive. This was no time for recriminations. "Carl I don’t need explanations right now. Those can wait. But I’m not going to climb into your hospital bed."

"Rachel, it’s been too long since I last held you. I still can’t believe your here and I’ll spend the rest of the night thinking it’s a dream. Let me hold you." As he talked Carl stretched out his hand to Rachel. Slowly she placed her hand in his and tentatively crawled into the narrow bed with him.

Sleepily Rachel rested her head on Carl’s chest.

"Tell me Rachel, are the grubs as wonderful as I’ve imagined?"

And, as they had so many times before, Carl and Rachel talked into the night laughing and giggling over stories of the grubs and memories of their life together.

When Cass and Loretta arrived the next morning they found Carl and Rachel still asleep in Carl’s bed. They slept peacefully, oblivious to the hubbub of activity that accompanied the early morning hospital routine.

As Cass and Loretta stood in the doorway to Carl’s room a nurse surprised them from behind.

"I don’t suppose you two could enlighten me as to the goings on here last night? I take one day off and suddenly Mr. Davis, a man with no known family has a woman in his bed."

Cass turned around and in his best lawyerly voice responded. "The man you know as Mr. Davis is actually Carl Hutchins, the woman with him is his wife, Rachel Hutchins. I’m Cass Winthrop, the Hutchins’ lawyer and this is Loretta Delahanty, family friend. For reasons I have yet to determine Mrs. Hutchins was only informed of her husband’s presence in this hospital yesterday afternoon. I expect we will be working to transfer Mr. Hutchins to a hospital closer to home as soon as his condition permits. I’d like to request that the Hutchins be left alone unless it is absolutely necessary to disturb them. Thank you."

Without saying a word the nurse walked back to the nurses’ station.

"I suppose you’ll be charging us for that counselor?" Cass turned and found Carl grinning at him. "Thank you. Nurse Ratchet over there would have made my life miserable for the next few days if you hadn’t intervened. She hates anything that disturbs her routine."

"Well Carl, considering the shock you’ve given us all I just might consider that one pro bono." To Cass’ surprise he was happy to see Carl awake and alert. "She’s been miserable without you old boy." Cass said with a nod to a waking Rachel.

"As have I without her. Tell me Cass, how did you find me"

Suddenly Rachel became aware of several pairs of eyes fixed on her. She got up from the bed with a cheshire grin. "You wouldn’t believe us if I told you so I’m not going to say anything. Let your imagination run wild." Rachel looked at Cass almost daring him to say anything.

"Honey, here’s your clothes from the house."

Rachel took the small suitcase from Loretta. "Thank you so much Loretta. I think I’m due for a change. Now if you will excuse me." With that Rachel disappeared into the bathroom.

Carl followed her with his eyes and then turned to his newest visitors. "Loretta, you are a sight for sore eyes. As beautiful as ever."

Loretta moved to give Carl a hug. "You sly fox. I can’t believe you’ve been in New York and haven’t even tried to call me. I can’t decide whether I’m angry with you or just thrilled to have you back."

"Thrilled I hope." With a nod toward Cass Carl added. "I think I’ll have my hands full of angry people for the next few weeks."

Rachel emerged from the bathroom refreshed and ready to get moving. "Carl, I’d like to get you transferred to Bay City as soon as possible. I don’t like the idea of being away from the twins any longer than necessary. If a transfer isn’t possible I’d like to bring the twins and Debra to New York. I don’t want them to be away from you a minute longer than is necessary."

Carl looked at Rachel. "I agree, I want to get back to Bay City as soon as possible, but not to the hospital. Give me a day or two to regain my strength and then we can return to Bay City together."

Now standing at the foot of Carl’s hospital bed Rachel added. "Well at least let me have Debra bring the twins. They won’t believe I’ve found you."

Letting out a sigh Carl replied. "Darling, I’m as anxious as anyone to see Cory and Elizabeth. I’ve thought of nothing but you and the children since I left Bay City. But, I don’t want them to see me like this. An old man sick and dying in a hospital bed."

Cass piped in, "If you’ll excuse us. I think Loretta and I will leave you two alone for a minute and get some coffee."

Rachel had almost forgotten they were in the room. "Yes, thank you both. I’ll meet you in the cafeteria in a little bit."

After Cass and Loretta had disappeared Rachel turned to Carl. "Darling, you’re not on the verge of death. You’ve been without your family for too long. Please let me bring the twins to see you."

"Rachel I’m adamant on this point. I do not want the first time Cory and Elizabeth see me to be in a hospital. By all means call them, tell them I’m anxious to see them, go to them, but I will not let them see me like this. Slowly Carl’s face took on the unmistakable look of determination and anger Rachel had grown to know too well. "They will see me strong and healthy or they will not see me at all. It’s bad enough they have a father as old as Moses, they don’t need to think of him as weakly and sick as well."

"All right Carl. I’ll call the twins and tell them we’ll be home as soon as possible."

As she moved around the room opening the curtains and straightening the bedside table Rachel tried to casually shift the conversation. "While we’re on the subject, how would you like news of your reappearance dealt with back home? I’m sure you can imagine the varied reactions within our own family, much less how it will affect Cory Publishing."

"I think it best to simply let the information filter its way out. Call Paulina, Vicky and Donna and let them know you’ve found me. I believe the Bay City grapevine will take care of everything else. As for your family, Amanda and Matthew, I’ll leave that decision up to you."

At that moment the hospital administrator entered the room. "Mr. and Mrs. ….Davis, or is it Hutchins?"

In unison Carl and Rachel replied. "Hutchins"

"Mr. and Mrs. Hutchins. Well, you’ve caused quite a stir." Turning to Rachel he hesitated. "Mrs. Hutchins I’m very sorry for the difficulties you encountered yesterday. I’ve spoken with your attorney and he assures me there are no hard feelings."

"Of course not. I appreciate the care you’ve given to my husband and appreciate the concern for his physical and emotional well being your staff exhibited yesterday. I would have been much more upset if they’d merely allowed me to waltz into his room, no questions asked."

The Administrator gives a sigh of relief. "I appreciate your understanding. Now, I understand you’re anxious to get Mr. Hutchins home. I’ve made arrangements with Doctor Sanchez to run all the necessary tests and the lab will expedite any test results so that we can discharge your husband as soon as is safe."

Rachel stepped forward to shake the administrator’s hand. "Thank you very much. I’m sure you can imagine how anxious we are to get back home."

Almost as soon as the administrator left the day nurse, Nurse Dumars appeared. "Well, I understand we’re suppose to get some tests taken care of and out of the way." With a wink at Carl she continued. " If I’d known this was all it took to get you out of our hair I would have started searching for your wife myself Ryan."

"Actually it’s Carl, Carl Hutchins. Please apologize to the rest of the staff for my subterfuge. I expect it’s been the talk of the break room today. I hope you all understand that I had very personal reasons for wanting to keep my identity secret."

As she settled Carl into the wheelchair the nurse looked at both Carl and Rachel. "Don’t be ridiculous, you don’t owe us any explanations. If there is talk I’ll set everyone straight. I’m just happy you seem to finally have found some peace. Everyone should have someone to look after them. I’m glad we were able to look after you for awhile but now we’ll turn that responsibility over to your family.

Now, Mrs. Hutchins if you’d like to wait here or downstairs in the cafeteria. I’ll have your husband back in about an hour."

"Thank you nurse. I think I’ll wait here."

After having waited for Rachel in the cafeteria for almost an hour Loretta went looking for her. She found Rachel sitting on the chair next to Carl’s bed staring at the floor.

"Honey where have you been? Cass and I have been waiting for you for almost an hour."

"I’m sorry Loretta." As Rachel looked up at Loretta it became apparent she’d been crying. "After they took Carl for some tests I’m afraid I fell apart."

"Rachel, what’s wrong honey, why are you crying?"

"I’ve been sitting here trying to convince myself I deserve Carl."

Loretta moved to Rachel and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Don’t be ridiculous. You’ve found him, now don’t go messing it up by laying a guilt trip on yourself. There’s nothing anyone could have done to prevent the situation."

"I’m not so sure. I feel as if I’ve been a failure at the most important job I have, being a wife and mother." With that the tears began to flow. "Has a wife ever more completely failed her husband? In the moment he should have turned to me, when he needed me most Carl fled rather than ask for my help." Getting up to look out the window she continued. "Did he ever feel I loved him completely? Did I fail to show him, to let him know that he was my world. I must have, he left rather than let me help him. He was afraid I would choose my children over him."

Turning to Loretta Rachel continued without a pause. Loretta just stood and listened, not saying a word.

"I remember, when everything started to go so badly, when Matt and Amanda and Cass and Felicia wanted me to leave Carl. I went to Mac’s grave. I made it clear to Mac I would always choose Carl, how could I have failed to let Carl know? My God, what kind of wife forces her husband to fight a battle against cancer alone?"

After a moment of silence Loretta finally responded with a stern voice. "Now that you have that off of your chest will you put the ridiculousness aside. Honey you and Carl love each other completely. He made the choices he made for a reason. If ever there was a time you needed to trust your love for each other and put aside any doubts its now."

As Loretta finished speaking Nurse Dumar wheeled Carl into the room. "Here he is ladies. The x-rays looked good, the lungs sound reasonably clear and it doesn’t take a trained professional to see that this man is ready to hit the road." As she helped Carl into bed she turned to Rachel. "I expect the doctor will want to go over the test results and the follow-up treatment that will be necessary before there’s any talk of releasing Ryan. Just wait here for now and I’ll call the doctor for you."

As the nurse and Rachel settled Carl into his hospital bed Loretta gathered up her purse and moved to the door.

"I’m going to leave you two alone now." With a nod to Rachel Loretta continued, "Cass has decided to go ahead and head back to Bay City so you two will be alone. I’m sure you have a lot to discuss. Rachel I’ll expect a progress report later tonight. Goodnight you two, be well." As she left the room Loretta blew a kiss into the air.

"Oh our Loretta, an infallible sense of timing. As much as I love the woman I can’t wait to have a moment alone with my wife. Come on love, give us a hug." Said Carl as a mischievous grin spread across his face.

Rachel couldn’t help but smile. "Have I told you in the last two minutes how happy I am to have you here in my arms, alive and reasonably well?"

"Well, no, but there’s plenty of time to remedy that."

Rachel sat on the hospital bed. "Darling, as much as we’ve tried to ignore it there is a two ton elephant in the room." Moving to face Carl Rachel took his hand and continued. "We need to discuss what happened before your disappearance and in the year you’ve been away. I need to know what happened to get us to this hospital room."

Carl began to stroke Rachel’s hair. "Oh love, I’d like to just enjoy our time together a little while longer before we allow the world to invade. Can’t it just be the two of us, you and I, for a moment longer?" And to prove his point Carl nuzzled up against Rachel’s neck.

Enjoying the moment Rachel replied. "Darling I love to be alone with you, to enjoy the romance of the mystery. But it won’t be much longer before we’re back in Bay City and we’ll have to deal with the questions and doubts of everyone there, not least of all Matthew and Amanda."

Pulling herself away from Carl Rachel looked him in the eye. "Let’s start at the beginning. Did you know Scott Guthrie and did he have anything to do with your disappearance?"

A look of shock and horror crossed Carl’s face. "How do you know Scott Guthrie? He was with me."

"He was in Bay City shortly after you died. I’m jumbling the timeline a bit but a few days, maybe a week, after you died he showed up on our doorstep. He claimed you’d hired him on your trip to Denver. I was just so thrilled to have someone near who had talked with you. Someone to share a few memories with that I didn’t question him very much. He had an employment contract signed by you so I assumed you just hadn’t had a chance to mention hiring him.

"It can’t have been difficult for him to get the contract signed. In the first few days after the shooting I was a bit groggy. I could have signed anything."

"Carl, did he play a role in your disappearance?"

"I should have known you’d figure it out. You’re much too intelligent to be put off by a few curves in the road. Darling can you please get me a drink of water? This may take awhile."

Carl began his story as Rachel poured a glass of water at the bedside table.

"A few months before my disappearance, I think it must have been late November or early December, I began to receive very cryptic notes and pictures of my father. Initially the notes weren’t too remarkable. Requests for money from someone who claimed to know my past." Chuckling despite himself Carl continued. "You may be shocked to know Rachel that I wasn’t always the saint you see before you. I didn’t give the notes too much notice except to put our security people on notice and to let Joe see one of the notes. After three or four notes the threats began. Threats against the Grubs along with descriptions of their daily routine. Well you know that this was completely unacceptable. I called the FBI and told them of the threats. That’s when Cameron appeared as our security man. Honestly darling he’s not the man I would have chosen, lacks a bit of finesse, but he seemed capable and I was grateful for the added eyes and ears."

"When you’ve finished with your story remind me to update you on Amanda’s love life."

Looking shocked Carl replied, "Amanda has a love life? Thank heavens, now maybe we’ll be able to get back to ours with minimal interference."

"Yes, we can hope. Now get back to your story."

"O.K. but love, I prefer saga, rather than story."

Letting out a half laugh Rachel got up and headed toward the window. "A saga huh. That grand?"

"I’ll let you be the judge of that. Now where, oh yes. Cameron arrived but the notes didn’t stop. I think I would have been able to deal with the notes but then the events with Felicia began. You remember, the "Embers in the Snow" happenings she was sure were my doing. I hated to see her so frightened but I was afraid that if anyone knew about the notes I had been receiving that we would be unable to apprehend whoever was invading our lives. And, ultimately, I felt that this was my past wrecking havoc on the present and I felt guilty."

"How’re we doing?" Carl and Rachel both gave a start as the nurse entered the room. "Sorry to interrupt but I need to take a few vitals. I hear your to be released shortly Ryan. I wager you’ll be glad to see the last of the needles and thermometers."

"Yes Alice, I shall, but I will miss seeing your lovely visage."

The nurse gave a quick glance in Rachel’s direction. "I don’t know how anyone could let a silver tongued fox like you out of their sight for a minute. I’ll miss you to Ryan. I’m done here."

As the nurse left the room Rachel moved back to sit on the edge of the bed. "You know the entire staff hates me. They think I abandoned you. And of course, you have completely charmed them. I imagine they think I’m leading you into the depths of despair."

"I’m sorry your reception has been so cool but you must remember. I’ve had months to woo them. I’ll be certain to explain everything to them before we leave."

"If that’s the case I think we’d best return to the ‘Saga of Carl the Brave’ so I at least have an idea of the explanation first."

Sitting up in bed Carl smoothed back his hair. "I believe you have finally begun to grasp the reality of the situation." Rachel just rolled her eyes at him. "As I was saying. Once things moved from mere notes to action I took the initiative and contacted my mysterious admirer. We arranged to meet in Denver. That’s when I met Mr. Guthrie. And my life changed, completely. Rachel it was one thing for me to deal with men like Scott when I was alone, but now, this time I had everything in the world to lose." Carl reached out for Rachel’s hand. "To imagine being the cause of harm or hurt to you or the Grubs was unimaginable."

As he rubbed Rachel’s hands Carl continued. "Scott claimed to be the son of my father. I didn’t put much stock in his claims until he showed me pictures of Andrew with Maria del Santos, Paulina’s mother. She was holding a small child and obviously pregnant. Everything fit. Maria had given birth to Paulina after Mac left and later become pregnant by Andrew. I never knew about the child. I can only imagine what life was like for Scott as a child because he was a very angry man. Full of rage and anger at Andrew, and myself, for abandoning him.

Maria must have died shortly after Scott was born because like Paulina, he had very little memory of her. Rachel, you know that I would have done anything possible if I had known of Scott’s birth."

"Of course darling." Rachel leaned forward and kissed Carl. "Even in your darkest hour you had a soft spot for children. It was wrong of Scott to imagine you could have done anything. Obviously your father had a life he didn’t want you to know anything about. How did this meeting with Scott end?"

"Scott made it clear in no uncertain terms that he had the will and the means to harm you and the children. He had used the "Embers in the Snow" threats against Felicia to demonstrate just how clever he could be. He wanted an enormous amount of money to end the threat to you and the Grubs. I couldn’t give him the money. It would have pushed Cory to the edge of bankruptcy and have bought us only temporary relief. I felt trapped by Scott and to exasperate matters my headaches were getting worse. I wasn’t thinking clearly, I couldn’t see a way out of Scott’s threats. I told him it would take me a few weeks to arrange the payoff and returned to Bay City."

"My God Carl. Why didn’t you confide in me? Turn to me for help. Things would have been so different if you had dealt with this together." Rachel let go of Carl’s hand and walked toward the window.

"I wanted to tell you so badly, to trust in you, but if you remember we were being attacked from all sides, Matthew, Amanda, Felicia and Cass were all questioning me, and by extension, your judgment. I didn’t want to see you in the position of having to explain or justify any of your actions. In addition I wasn’t thinking clearly. I now know it was a tumor but at the time I truly believed I may have been going crazy.

The headaches, Scott, the accusations by friends and family, they all played on my mind and rendered me very susceptible when Scott pushed things to the edge.

If you remember, shortly after I returned from Denver we decided to leave Bay City. Scott found out about the planned move and made a blatant threat, the Cory money or your life. I didn’t believe he would go through with it. I thought I would be able to appeal to him as a brother, to offer him the kind of family he’d never had before. You understand Rachel he was a link between Paulina and myself. All those times Paulina had defended me, loved and accepted me, it seemed to fit together. We were family, not just through our marriage but through Scott. I thought if I could only show Scott the love of a family he would drop this ridiculous plan and the accusations and doubts would stop.

"And then he shot you." As she stood looking out the window Rachel continued. "Or was it me he meant to shoot."

"The bullet was meant for you. Only by the grace of God did I look up and see him on the hillside, taking aim at you. You can’t imagine the fear and dread that flooded over me at that moment. I had failed in the one thing that mattered, keeping you safe. I think I decided in that split second that I had to leave, I couldn’t stay if it meant you would be in danger."

Rachel rushed to the bed and took Carl into her arms. "I can imagine the fear and dread. I lived through it, believing I would never see you again. How I wish you had confided in me, allowed me to help you, to save us." Rachel stepped back and looked at Carl. He looked exhausted. "Just tell me why the explosion, and how did you get out of the hospital. Who’s ashes did I spread in the Keys?"

"He gave you ashes to spread?" Carl grinned and wagged a finger at Rachel. "You have to give him credit. Despite his obvious faults Scott did have an eye for detail. I wish I could answer all your questions but I can only tell you what I know.

As I lay in the hospital bed, even before you were allowed in to see me, Scott appeared dressed as a doctor. He told me next time he wouldn’t miss. I panicked and told him it was all part of the plan. We had to fake my death in order to get the Cory money. He agreed to help me get out of Bay City under the assumption that he would get the Cory money in return. I didn’t know any other way to keep you safe.

After you left the emergency room that night he returned and, without a word, wheeled me out of the hospital and into a waiting helicopter ambulance. I never heard an explosion. Was anyone hurt?"

"Yes, Marley suffered severe burns but I believe they were able to get the rest of the patients out with minimal injuries. Add Marley’s new look to the list of recent events I need to fill you in on."

"Poor Marley. I’m afraid she’s paid too high a price for having me as a part of her life."

"Carl you can’t blame yourself for Scott’s actions. You had no idea what he was planning.

I think you need a rest. Why don’t we leave things there for a bit. I’m going to get something to eat, call the grubs and then I’ll be back. You try and get some sleep."

"Yes, that sounds like a plan. Do me a favor and draw the curtains when you leave. Those nurses have seen more than enough of me to last them a lifetime."

Rachel tucked Carl in and gave him a kiss before heading to the cafeteria.

After hanging up with the Grubs Rachel called Joe. He was out so she left a message asking him to find out everything he could about Scott and Maria. She had to find out if Scott was Paulina’s half-brother. Paulina would need to know.

As she read the latest offering from Tony Hillerman Rachel couldn’t help but wonder what life would have been like if Carl had told her of Scott’s plan. Would they have fled together, with the Grubs or would they have been able to fend off Scott and keep Cory Publishing on track. They would never know.

After a couple of hours Carl started to stir. She forgot how much she missed watching him sleep. Often times it had seemed to be the only time he found peace. He’d often told her that in his dreams his family was together. Ryan, Perry the Grubs and her, all together. That reminded Rachel of what had started this entire journey, her dream of Ryan. She said a silent prayer of thanksgiving to him. Once again he had brought them together.

As he sat up in bed Carl scanned the room quickly before his eyes came to rest on her. "I don’t know how many mornings it will take until I lose that moment of fear when I imagine its all been a dream. But then again, I hope I never lose that thrill that washes over me when I see your face."

"Well, someone is in a good mood. I was a bit afraid I’d tired you out earlier with all of my questions about Scott and those months."

"Of course not my love. I can only imagine the questions you must have. I’m afraid I don’t have much more to tell you. From Bay City we flew to the house in the Keys where we spent a few days. I can’t tell you how many times I thought of phoning José at the end of the road and asking him to call you, to tell you I was alive. It was unbearable being there, in that house without you and the Grubs. Since the moment they were born that house has been theirs, in right and in spirit."

"I couldn’t agree more. That house belongs to them, and you, completely. When I went to the house to spread the ashes I was so overwhelmed with the sense of you. I’d wake up sure you were in the room. Your spirit is very strong in that house."

"I was there that night, when you came to spread the ashes. I wanted so desperately to wake you but by that time I was sure the brain tumor would claim my life. I thought it would be terribly unfair to wake you from the nightmare of my death only to sentence you to watching me die again in what I had been assured by the doctors would be a painful and agonizing descent into madness and eventually death."

Rachel walked over to the bed. "Carl, I don’t want second guess your choices but you need to know that taking care of you would never be a duty, an obligation or a chore. Every moment I get to spend with you is a blessing. I’d happily spend the rest of my life taking care of you."

"Well, thanks to the good work of the doctors and nurses we will never have to put you to the test on that one. I’m tumor free and after a few more days of rest I should be back to the rogue you fell in love with."

"First a Greek hero and now a rogue. You’ve become a legend in the time you’ve been gone. Looks like the Grubs and I will have our work cut out for us bringing you back down to the world of the mortal."

With a gleam in his eye Carl looked at Rachel. "Love, I can’t wait to return to the world of the mortal with you."

Rachel laughed. "Neither can I darling, neither can I." And the two fell into a passionate embrace.

As she watched the lights of the city come up outside the window Rachel finally broached the subject again.

"Carl, after you got to the Keys what happened?"

"As I mentioned earlier, the house was too full of memories. It was too painful to be there and Scott was having trouble finding adequate medical care for me. I had a hired nurse with me but as the headaches worsened it became apparent that I needed more intense treatment.

Scott must have been preoccupied with events in Bay City because he didn’t spend very much time in the Keys with us. The next time he returned he informed us we were leaving and the next thing I knew we were in New York.

I must admit it did begin to feel as if you were haunting me. Everywhere we went there were memories of you."

"Scott can’t have spent very much time with you. He was working at Cory and for a time at least, wooing Amanda."

"Well that’s one relationship we can be glad ended quickly.

I’m not certain where Scott was or what he was doing but after we had been in New York for a bit he just disappeared. The nursing staff wasn’t being paid so they got me admitted here and vanished. Luckily Scott had left some money in the hotel safe and after I was admitted here the hotel forwarded the money under the mistaken impression that it was mine."

"Carl, do you know what happened to Scott?"

"No, I presumed that, given the life he lived, he died as a result of a deal gone bad or a past associate."

"We’ll save the details for later but yes, Scott is dead. He died trying to get access to some Cory money."

A look of despair passed across Carl’s face. "Rachel, I think we’ve discussed this enough for now. If you wish we can revisit the issue tomorrow but right now I’d like an update on my Grubs. Don’t leave anything out."

After a few more days spent trying to restructure the timeline of the year since Carl had disappeared Rachel and Carl were satisfied they had enough information to satisfy the family, for the moment, that Carl had nothing to do with the missing Cory funds and to explain his disappearance.

Dr. Sanchez entered the room as Carl and Rachel waited. "Well Mr. Hutchins I see that you’re already dressed. You’re not anxious to leave are you? We’re quite proud of the hospitality we offer here at Chez Sloan-Kettering."

"Dr. Sanchez I can’t thank you enough for all of the hard work you and the rest of the hospital staff have done on my behalf but I must be honest. I can’t wait to get home."

"Well then, I’m happy to tell you that you are now a free man. I’ve forwarded your records to BCUH. Your doctor there will want to see you when you return but other than an annual check-up I think you should be free of any medical interference for awhile." She moved forward to shake his hand. "Be well."

For a moment it seemed that Carl would be overcome with emotion. "Words seem terribly inadequate. I am forever indebted to all of you. Goodbye."

Rachel helped Carl into the wheelchair that was required under hospital policy.

As the elevator doors closed behind them Carl grasped Rachel’s hand. "Well my love, are we headed directly to the airport?"

"No." Rachel looked down at Carl. "If you don’t mind I thought we would spend a night here in New York, alone, together, before I share you with Bay City."

"My love I do believe I’ve just been propositioned."

"I’m sorry Carl. Would you rather go to Bay City tonight?"

"Not on you’re life."

Behind them the orderly blushed and pretended not to be listening.

As they stepped out onto the sidewalk in front of the hospital Carl took in a deep breath.

"Ah sweet life. Rachel I don’t remember a more perfect moment. It’s a wonderful thing to be fully aware of how full of wonder and mystery life is."

"Yes, it’s true. Life is sweeter, the suns brighter, and the world seems a little bit happier today."

"Now tell me Mrs. Hutchins to where are we headed?"

"The Plaza, of course. Shall I get a cab?"

"No, I think I’d like to walk." And offering Rachel his arm the two strolled toward the park.

When they eventually arrived in their suite they found their bags had already been unpacked and their clothes were hanging in the closet. The suite was comprised of a large room that was divided into a sitting area that opened onto a balcony and the rear portion of the room which was dominated by a large bed and a fireplace on the far wall. Doors on either side of the bed led to separate dressing rooms.

As soon as the bellhop closed the door behind him Carl reached for Rachel and pulled her tightly against him whispering "Alone at last" and into a passionate kiss.

After a moment Rachel whispered into Carl’s ear. "Darling, I’ve missed you but I’ve made dinner reservations."

Without letting go of her Carl complained. "Rachel you can’t be serious. It’s been more than a year since we’ve been alone together and you want to go out into a crowd of people?"

Rachel freed herself from his grasp and with a mischievous look in her eye said quietly, "I once had a lover who taught me all the joys of the anticipation. Let’s go to dinner and enjoy each other’s company. I promise you won’t be disappointed." With that Rachel slowly made her way to the dressing room. "It will take me just a minute to change. Your things are in the closet."

When Rachel emerged she found Carl looking his dapper best in what they would later refer to as his "Regis Philbin" suit, all black. Rachel wore her hair up in a simple twist and was wearing a strapless red dress that accentuated her long neck and strong shoulders.

"Rachel I can’t remember when you looked more beautiful."

"I was hoping you’d be impressed. Now we’d better get going if we want to make our reservations."

Over dinner they talked some about the grubs and the recent happenings in Bay City but most of the conversation centered on the two of them and the agony of their separation. Rachel was in her element. Throughout the night she flirted with and wooed Carl, whispering in his ear, pouring his wine for him, laughing at every witty comment he made and making Carl the envy of every other man in the restaurant.

As they rode back to the hotel in the back of the limousine Rachel loosened Carl’s tie for him.

"Carl is there anything you need? Are you uncomfortable, tired?"

"No Rachel, everything is perfect and sleep is the last thing on my mind." Just as Carl pulled Rachel towards him the car came to an abrupt halt and the privacy glass lowered.

"Mr. Hutchins, here’s the hotel. Would you like me to take you on to somewhere else? It would be a shame to waste your wife’s beautiful dress on just the restaurant. I could take you on to a club."

"No Keith. Thank you but I think that will be everything for this evening. Goodnight."

The ride in the elevator seemed interminable to Carl. The elevator attendant faced forward never glancing at Carl and Rachel but Carl couldn’t take his eyes off of Rachel and she was obviously reveling in his attentions. He softly caressed her back with the back of his hand and brushed a kiss across her shoulder. A shiver ran through Rachel. "Are you cold darling?"

With a slight grin Rachel glanced at Carl and said nothing.

Once they were in the suite Carl enclosed Rachel in a tight embraced and enveloped her in a kiss. This time Rachel didn’t resist. Slowly Carl released her and took a step back. The only light in the room were a few candles on the mantle and a small fire that had obviously been lit by the staff just moments before they had returned to the room.

Rachel stepped back toward the fireplace and let her hair fall around her shoulders. Carl walked toward her and gently caressed her shoulders and began to speak, barely above a whisper.

"In the darkest moments, when I was certain I’d never see you again, never hold you, I’d hold on to the moments we spent together. The smoothness of your skin against mine, the fragrance of your hair, the curve of body. I’ve memorized them all but every time were together I’m overwhelmed by you, the beauty of you."

Carl swept Rachel into his arms and into carried her to the bed.

I can feel the magic floating in the air

Being with you gets me that way

I watch the sunlight dance across your face

I’ve never been this swept away

All my thought just seem to settle on the breeze

When I’m lying wrapped up in your arms

The whole world just fades away and the only thing I hear is the beating of your heart

I can feel you breath

Just washing over me

And suddenly I’m melting into you

There’s nothing left to prove

Baby all we need is just to be

Caught up in the touch, slow and steady rush

Baby isn’t that the way loves suppose to be

I can feel you breath

Just breath

The next morning Carl was awakened by a quiet knock on the door and a call of "Room Service."

Rachel emerged from the dressing room wearing Carl’s black silk robe. "Come in. Darling are you awake already?"

Without stopping Rachel had made her way to the door and stepped back to make way for the room service cart. The bellhop handed Rachel the tab to sign and was gone before Carl had managed to get his thoughts in order.

"I was hoping to have breakfast in bed ready and waiting for you before you woke up. I want you to take it easy, don’t over do it."

"That’s not the impression you gave me last night."

With that Carl finally managed to get Rachel to blush. "Oh, well, that’s enough of that. Sit up and drink your coffee." Handing Carl a cup of coffee Rachel did her best Vanna White impression with a sweep of her arm in the direction of the breakfast cart. "For you today we have a selection of waffles with strawberry sauce, eggs, poached or scrambled and bacon or sausage."

"Good heavens Rachel, I can’t eat all that!"

"Well, I don’t expect you to eat everything but I wasn’t sure what you’d have an appetite for this morning and I wanted to be sure you had something to eat before we headed to the airport. You have a big day ahead of you."

In a single movement Carl put his coffee cup down on the bedside table and grabbed Rachel, pulling her to him on the bed. "I’ll tell you what I have an appetite for this morning, and its not on the breakfast menu."

A few hours later Rachel had finally managed to get everything ready for the trip to the airport. This time she was the one waiting for Carl to get ready. She had decided to go casual today, foregoing the usual suit or slacks for her favorite pair of jeans, a white blouse and a lightweight black jacket to ward of the chill of the airplane.

"Carl I told Jim we would be at the airport by 11:30. If we’re too late we’ll have to wait for another take-off time. You remember how busy the New York airports are. The Grubs will never forgive us if we’re late."

Carl emerged from the dressing room still adjusting his cuff links. He was wearing black slacks and a powder blue silk shirt open at the collar with his hair pulled back in its trademark ponytail. "I’m sorry Rachel but I want everything to be just right when I see Cory and Elizabeth. Who knows how much they really remember of me? I want to make a good impression."

"Carl they don’t care what you’re wearing, they just want you back. Now let’s get going." Stopping at the door Rachel looked back at Carl. "Do you think I’m under dressed? I didn’t realize this was going to be a formal occasion."

"Rachel you could wear a sack and make it look wonderful. Now don’t mock me. I’m nervous enough as it is." Carl closed the door behind them.

The house looked just the same as the day Carl had disappeared. Of course it would. Rachel had kept it the same since shortly before Mac had died. She preferred instead to make renovations to the outlying buildings and to focus on decorating the cabin and the house in the Keys. The homes she felt were hers rather than part of the Cory legacy Amanda and Matthew would one day inherit.

Carl stopped at the door.

"Rachel are you sure I look alright? It may sound silly but I want the Grubs to be proud of me, to be worth the wait."

Rachel hugged Carl around his waist. "Darling you look wonderful, very dashing and debonair. Any child would be proud to call you dad, or Da as the Grubs prefer."

"Isn’t that funny. I never thought about what they would call me. I guess with Amanda and Matthew in the house I’m lucky they don’t call me much worse."

Rachel laughed and joking punched Carl in the arm. "As awful as Matt and Amanda were to you during our marriage they have been very respectful of your memory. They would never speak ill of you when Cory and Elizabeth were around. Now let’s get inside. I asked Donna and Felicia to wait until later to come by so we should be able to spend a few hours with just us and the kids."

As he opened the door Carl couldn’t resist uttering under his breath. "Once more into the breach."

As soon as Carl had opened the door he could hear the calls of Elizabeth and Cory. "Da, Da, Da’s home!"

Elizabeth leapt into his arms and pulled him into a hug with her arms wrapped around his neck. Cory was just behind her and was content to hug Carl around his waist. While Elizabeth clearly intended to claim Carl for her own Cory moved back into the living room and stood in front of Matt. Matt placed a protective hand on Cory’s shoulder. Matthew, Lila, Amanda, Paulina, Joe, Dante and Allie stood just inside the doorway to the living room.

Matt was the first to speak. "Carl its good to have you home. As you can see you were very missed." He extended his hand to Carl.

"That’s right Carl. I can’t tell you how much the twins, Rachel and Paulina, Hell, how much all of us missed you." Joe also moved to shake Carl’s hand.

"Thank you Joe."

From behind him Rachel spoke up. "Let’s move into the living room. Carl do you need to sit down?"

"No thank you, I’m fine darling."

Paulina moved toward Carl and wiped a tear from her eyes. "Are you all right Carl? We don’t want to over do it. Now that we have you back we’re going to take care of you."

Carl put Elizabeth down and moved into the living room and gathered Paulina in a hug. "Oh sweet Paulina. There was never any doubt in my mind that your arms would welcome me home."

Carl bent down to look Allie in the eye. "And my beautiful Alexandra." He cupped her face in his hands. "I have missed my favorite granddaughter terribly. How is Buster the turtle?"

"Well, we’re on Buster the fourth now but he’s fine. I’m so glad you’re back. Nothing was the same when you were gone."

Carl knelt down and gave Allie a hug. "No, nothing was the same but now I’m back and I’m never going away again.

"Carl, some things have changed since you left." Carl stood up and looked to Lila.

"Yes Lila, Rachel told me about the newest grandchild on the way. I’m must say I am a bit surprised about the latest news but thrilled at the prospect of having another baby in the house. I trust you are doing well."

"Yes, of course! And I’m so happy that you will be here for the wedding."

"Rachel didn’t tell me anything about the wedding. When are the nuptials?" Carl glaned in Rachel’s direction. Rachel shrugged her shoulders.

Lila took Matt’s hand and looked from him to Carl. "Well, we haven’t exactly set a date. We’re going to until the baby is born. I don’t want to be waddling down the aisle."

Carl moved forward and put his hands on Lila’s expanding belly. "I’m sure everything will work out nicely Lila." Finally Carl turned toward Amanda. "And Amanda, I trust you’re well. You’ve been unusually quiet."

Amanda looked uncomfortable and didn’t reply. Allie moved toward her mother and gave her a gentle nudge.

"I guess I’m still a little shocked by your return. It’s going to take some time to get used to the idea of your being alive."

"Don’t worry Amanda. I assure you I plan on spending the majority of my time with Rachel and the Grubs. You’ll continue to have free reign at Cory and I will do my best to make my return as comfortable as possible for you."

"Carl, I didn’t mean to imply…"

"No Amanda, I’m sure you didn’t but I get the message loud and clear. At the moment I don’t have the strength to return to Cory Publishing and I shall have my hands clear working to find the missing money Scott Gutherie stole from Cory. But I don’t want to talk about that right now." Taking Cory and Elizabeth by the hand Carl moved to go upstairs. "If you don’t mind I think I’d like to have the Grubs give me a tour of their rooms and then perhaps lay down for a bit. Thank you all for welcoming me home. It means a great deal to me."

As Rachel, Carl and the twins disappeared up the stairs Paulina turned to Amanda.

"Amanda even if you aren’t glad to have Carl back the least you could do is try and make him feel welcome for Rachel’s sake, and the twins. Can’t you see how thrilled they are to have their father back?"

"I’m sorry I can’t welcome him back with open arms but I am still a little skeptical of him. How do we know he didn’t steal the money and he hasn’t just come back to finish the company off?"

By now Paulina was seething. "We just know Amanda. We know because he’s family and we love him and we know he would never do anything to hurt us. If this proves anything to you it should at least show you that Carl will make any sacrifice necessary to protect this family."

Joe moved to stand behind Paulina. "That’s right Amanda. I’m as skeptical as the next guy but everything Carl told Rachel has proven to be true. Scott did make the money transfers using a document obviously signed by Carl while under the effects of the gunshot and pain medication. Carl has transferred every cent he has to keep Cory Publishing afloat and clearly he left to protect Rachel from Scott. Can’t you cut the guy some slack?"

"I don’t know Joe. It seems to me I’ve cut him a lot of slack by just letting him back into the house."

Elizabeth had hardly stopped talking since they climbed the stairs.

"And Da, this is my collection of Beanie Babies. Did I have any Beanie Babies before you left? I don’t remember?"

Carl looked to Rachel with a quizzical look.

"Beth I think you had a few Beanie Babies before Da had to go away. Core, why don’t you show Da your Harry Potter collection? I bet he’d love to read them with you. He’s much better at making voices than I am."

"Yes Cory, I’d love to see what you’re reading."

Cory pulled the voluminous book off of the shelf. "This is the fourth book. I just got it the other day and haven’t started reading it yet. We were waiting for you to come home."

Carl moved to look at the book. He took the book from Cory and sat in the big red overstuffed reading chair near the bookcase. "If you’d like to we could start reading it right now."

Cory and Elizabeth both seemed to almost jump to attention. Cory spoke softly, tracing imaginary lines in the chair as he spoke. "Are you sure you don’t have anything more important to do? We could wait until later."

Carl pulled Elizabeth onto his lap and made room for Cory to sit in the chair next to him. "No, I’m sure the most important thing I have to do is to be right here with you."

Rachel sat on the bed and watched as Elizabeth and Cory nestled closer to Carl and listened intently as he began to read, interrupting Carl only to explain issues of muggles, witches and warlocks.

Later that night Carl and Rachel lay in bed enjoying the quiet of a house at slumber. Carl rested his head on Rachel’s chest, listening to the sound of her heartbeat, feeling the warmth of her skin against his. Rachel didn’t move but enjoyed the weight of his body and the comfort of his presence.

Finally Carl spoke. "And in the end he realized he had taken more than he gave, been forgiven more than he forgave and been loved more than he had loved."