Chapter 1 The
door swung open, and she stepped outside, one foot in front of the other,
concentrating on the motions.
Leaning
against the gritty brick of the building, she pulled out the pack of cigarettes
from her pocket, shaking one out easily and placing it between her lips.
Her mouth
twitched slightly as she crumpled up the empty pack, another unconscious
warning from the part of her that had died a long time ago. But she didn't
reach for a light, yet…just stood, taking in the night. There was an eerie
stillness that seemed to hover over the street, the town…a quiet, like the calm
before a storm. It shook her a bit, but she only ignored the feeling that was
growing inside of her. The door opened again beside her, and Maria walked out,
silver alien apron shining in the streetlight's glow.
"Liz."
Her voice was
low and menacing.
Reaching out,
she grabbed the stick from Liz's mouth and dropped it to the ground, crushing
it under her shoe.
"I thought
you quit."
She only
shrugged.
"Guess
not."
There were so
many more things that she wanted to say to Maria…her best friend, at one time
maybe….apologies-caring words. But they just wouldn't come. They formed in her
mind, but never reached her lips. There would be other days for that.
She looked
down at the ground, at the small pile of tobacco and torn paper.
"That
was my last one."
"Oh
well…I guess I'm sorry then."
Her voice was
sarcastic, an angry edge evident. Liz knew it was easy to ignore that tone. She
did it with everyone she knew.
Just like she
ignored Maria's heavy sigh, not moving her eyes from the faded stone of the
walkway.
"I
just…"
Liz sighed
herself, mockingly, exaggerated.
"I gotta
go Maria. I'll…see you later."
Without
another backwards glance she took off across the street, walking away from her
home and her friend.
She just
couldn't take it anymore. Stepping onto the walk on the opposite side of the
street, she heard her cry.
"Liz!
Please.."
She didn't
want to turn, but somehow her feet moved at their own accord.
"What?"
Her voice
came out harsh and cold, shocking her. Maria stood in the middle of the road,
shoulders slumped, a tear running crookedly down her face.
"Just
talk to me."
She could
have broken, then…forgotten everything and just hugged her, talked to her.
Remembered how good things had been with them, once upon a time.
But the
moment passed, and she knew that she couldn't. She couldn't go back.
"I'm
sorry."
It was all
she could give her, right now. With one last look at Maria's face, she turned
again and walked away. She didn't stop until she heard the screech of the
brakes…and the scream that shattered the silence.
Chapter 2 Her
head seemed to be spinning out of control as she sat, motionless, in the
waiting room chair.
Muffled
words, sobs, the sound of the television….all faded to the back of her mind,
blocked out by the visions that tormented her.
Maria's face
as she'd pleaded with her.
Maria's face
as she'd lain on the ground…bleeding and broken, eyes closed.
The
ambulance, speeding torward them and then the flurry of activity as they loaded
her tiny frame onto the gurney. All of the tubes and machines, beeping and
whirring.
Maria…silent,
still, pale.
Maria.
'I'm sorry.'
A simple
prayer, a cry for help and forgiveness.
Her fault. It
was always her fault.
Maria would
die because of her.
She knew that
she would die.
There was no
hope left in her heart.
Maria's face
filled her mind, a portrait of life and death all at once. She had been so full
of life. And then her mind was flooded with pictures, memories of her life
before…high school, college.
She, Maria,
and Alex.
Studying,
partying, shopping…all the fun they'd had together. Vibrant Maria, the one that
had never let them stay sad, their pillar of strength through hard times.
She had loved
Maria so much…she had been her best friend, and one of the most important
people in her life.
But then the
memories grew dark, overshaded with sadness and fear… Liz's Grandmother, dead
on her hospital bed.
Her parents,
fighting…divorcing.
College.
It had been
the last straw..moving away and having to survive on her own. The pressure had
broken her, that and the pain.
Slowly-that's
how it had started, her downhill journey. Her grades had dropped, and she'd
spent more and more time alone, in her room. Until she had finally just stopped
showing up at her classes. For awhile, there had been drugs…and sex, a
different man every night. By the time her first year of college had passed,
she'd already had an overdose and an abortion.
That summer
she'd returned to Roswell, in a deep depression and just hoping to find some of
the normalcy she'd left behind.
But things
had never been the same.
Maria and
Alex were happy. Going to college, enjoying their lives. They'd welcomed her
back, of course. At first.
She just
hadn't been able to let go, though. Of everything she'd seen and been through.
Her friends,
her home just weren't enough to bring her back to herself…and she had not known
what was.
Until now.
She could
only think that if Maria would just get better…if she could see her again, talk
to her…she could be okay. She could think again, reach through the dark clutter
of her head and find the light again. She would be able to remember how the
real Liz Parker acted, and thought…was. And she could be her.
His deep
voice rattled her deeply, reaching out to her as none had done in so long.
She raised
her head, found the deep brown eyes staring back at her. "I'm Dr.
Evans."
She found
herself only staring back, unable to comprehend anything happening around her.
All she could see was those deep, soulful eyes. "Miss…Parker?"
The wheels
began to turn again, and she could think.
"Yes….I'm
sorry."
She blinked,
struggled to gather her thoughts.
"About
Ms. Deluca…"
Her heart
began to pound in her chest.
"Is she
okay?"
He tried to
hide his concern, but she could see through it. His eyes told her everything.
"She's…in
a coma."
Another flash
in her mind, Maria laughing, eating ice cream from the carton.
"Oh my
God."
Her head was
spinning again, and this time she couldn't seem to catch it.
Nothing was
ever going to be okay again…
"Miss
Parker? Are you okay?"
She could
remotely feel herself slumping over, blacking out. But she couldn't…she had to
be there..for Maria…
"Yeah…yeah,
fine."
She propped
herself against the arm of the chair.
"Will
she wake up?"
The fleeting
look of worry crossed his face again.
The scream of
sirens sounded in her ears, drowning out all of the sounds again.
She felt the
tear slip down her cheek, the first of many that she couldn't hold back.
She made no
move to wipe them away…only waited until the screaming stopped, and tried to
focus on the doctor.
He was
talking, slowly, deliberately.
"….depends
on how long she stays in the coma. The longer she does, the less of a chance
she has to wake up."
More tears.
"Is
there…anything you can do? Please?"
He did not
answer her at first, and she felt the hope slipping away once again.
"I think
so."
His whispered
words brought it all back.
Chapter 3 He
slipped quietly into the room, glancing quickly around before advancing toward
the bed.
The petite
blonde girl looked tiny in the huge bed, the stark white sheets pulled up to
her chin and hiding all but her pale face.
He felt his
stomach twist in agony upon seeing her.
Every day, no
matter how many broken and bruised people he saw, it never managed to affect
him differently. It always hurt.
Cautiously,
he began to approach her bedside….taking small, measured steps, feeling his
hands trembling beside him as he grew closer.
The little
voice in his head…the one that sometimes sounded strangely similar to Isabel's,
began to question his motives, scolded him for even thinking about something
like this…
Struggling
desperately to block it out, he continued to stare at the girl.
A face
flashed before him, in his mind, and he found himself smiling in
remembrance….dark hair, soulful eyes. She had looked so sad, but yet so
beautiful. All he wanted to do was help her…to make her smile. He would give
anything to see her smile.
He reached
out, lightly touching the girl's arm, sliding his hand down until he felt her
pulse. It was weak…so very weak, like she was just barely hanging on to life.
The voice
surfaced again, begging him not to go through with it…to think once of himself,
and his family…to protect them. Reminding him to think this through, to be in
control.
But above all
of it he still heard her voice…..Elizabeth Parker. "Is there anything you
can do…please?"
Her haunted
eyes, her broken soul….it was all that pushed him forward, made him continue on
his mission.
When he had
become a doctor, he had sworn to Isabel, Micheal, and himself that he would
never use his powers. He would be like any other normal physician..using human
medicine to heal people.
The girl that
sat outside had affected him enough to make him break that oath…and risk
everything that they had worked their entire lives to protect.
But he
couldn't think of that now….and he could not go back. With both hands, he
gently cupped her head. She was still, and her eyes remained closed.
He closed his
own, concentrating, pouring all of his strength into her, healing her.
A jolt passed
through his body, and the flood of images washed over him, so quickly that they
were only bright flashes of light. First their were children, playing, dancing,
talking…a small dark haired girl and boy.
The same
children, growing up…high school, graduation. A girl that he recognized as Liz,
crying, throwing things..yelling. Driving off.
He could feel
all of Maria's pain, all of the emotions she'd felt as Liz had left her.
It was all
over almost as soon as it had begun, the impact of everything knocking him
slightly away from her bed, and into the thin divider curtain.
When he
opened his eyes again to look at her, he was grateful to see that her eyes were
not open, but that she was coming to her senses. Maybe he still had a chance to
cover all of this up. Returning to stand beside her, he waited until she had
completely awaken, disoriented but alive.
"Huh..where…what
happened?"
She was
looking around frantically, confused when she realized where she was.
He placed a
calming hand on her shoulder, gently pushing her back down against the bed.
"You're
fine, Miss Deluca. You were in an accident this afternoon, but everything's
okay. You gave us a little scare, but there was no major damage done."
She only
nodded, not completely understanding his meaning.
"Liz?"
He shook his
head.
"No,
she's…"
He felt the
presence beside him, smelled the wonderful scent of her before he saw her.
"Hey
Maria."
The tears in
her voice were evident, but the smile was more so.
"God, I
thought I'd lost you…"
Maria had
begun to cry now as well, but was grinning giddily.
"I'm so
sorry."
Maria
sniffled.
"Me
too."
Liz walked
around to the other side of the bed and leaned down, embracing her friend
tightly.
Neither of
them verbalized it, but both of them knew that things were going to change.
Max watched
them, smiling slightly, before he turned to leave.
"No,
wait!"
Elizabeth.
He turned
around slowly, plastering on his professional face. There was nothing he wanted
more than to talk to her…but he knew that things had to end here.
If it went
beyond this moment, this room….everything would fall apart. So he said nothing
as she walked over to him, smiling brightly, her eyes glistening with tears.
"Thank
you," she whispered.
He avoided
her eyes, instead focusing on the wall behind her.
"It's my
job."
He knew it
was a stupid reply, but all other words had seemed to fail him just then.
She leaned
closer to him.
"No…what
you did…it was a miracle. I don't know exactly what it was..but you saved her
life. Thank you, so much."
He felt
himself waver at her closeness. It was almost overwhelming…the scent of her
hair, the feel of her warm breath on his face.
Nodding, he
started to turn again.
It would only
take 5 seconds to get to the door, and then he could put this behind him
forever…
Her arms
wrapped around him suddenly, winding around his neck and pulling him tightly
against her.
"I mean
it."
And, ignoring
all reason, he hugged her back, reveled in the feel of her body pressed against
his…of his arms wrapped around her tiny waist. It was like nothing he'd ever
known, and everything he'd always dreamed of. He knew that, even though he'd
only met this woman 30 minutes ago…that their lives had somehow been
entertwined, and it was something that he could not change.
Pulling away,
he smiled at her, a secret smile that told the secrets of his heart.
"Bye."
She smiled
back.
"Bye."
He walked
away, knowing that it would not be the last time that he saw her.
Chapter 4 She
turned the key in the ignition, the engine roaring to life as she pressed the
gas pedal lightly.
Glancing in
the rearview mirror, she spotted the older woman pushing Maria over in a
wheelchair.
Leaning over
to open the door, she smiled up at the nurse.
"Thanks."
She helped
Maria out of the chair and into the car's low bucket seat, snapping in her
seatbelt for her.
"It's
okay, honey. Just remember to stay off your feet, and take your medicine if you
start to feel bad."
Maria nodded
lightly.
"Okay."
The woman
closed the door, and walked away from the car. Liz knew that for some reason,
Dr. Evans was trying to keep up appearances that Maria was still…fragile.
She had no
idea why, but she knew that it had something to do with how he'd saved her. And
she had no intentions of blowing his cover.
"So…that
was weird, huh?"
Liz looked
over at Maria as she pulled away from the hospital.
"Yeah. I
was really scared. But then…it was just like…well, a miracle."
Maria smiled.
"That
doctor was pretty cute, huh?"
Liz grinned.
"Cute?
He was hot!"
The girls
laughed together, something that they had not done in ages. It was one of the
best feelings Liz knew..to be able to talk to her best friend again.
"Yeah,
you two looked pretty cozy in there.."
Liz flushed.
"He was
your doctor! He saved your life…I thought it was appropriate." "It
looked like he thought it was more than appropriate. He was getting into
it!"
Liz laughed
again.
"Okay.
Sure, Maria."
"I mean
it. I can see you two…you know, hooking up."
"Oh
yeah, me too. I'll just come back to the hospital tomorrow, tell him where it
hurts and how he can make it better."
Maria
dissolved into a fit of giggles, clutching her stomach.
"And
I'll bet that he wouldn't mind that one bit."
As she
carefully drove down the highway, Liz couldn't help but remember the day's
earlier events. She still couldn't get it out of her head….everything that had
happened.
"Maria..I
really am sorry about earlier. And…everything."
The silence
that came after her words worried her a bit, but she knew that Maria needed
time to think.
"I don't
exactly remember everything about today. But about everything else…I knew that
you were confused, Liz. That you'd had a hard time, and you were just trying to
figure things out. But I also knew that when you did, you would be back. And I
would have my best friend again. I never gave up on you. Because I had faith
that you would find your way."
Tears pricked
at Liz's eyes.
"Thanks.
You're the best."
She tossed a
smile over to her, receiving one in return.
"You
too."
An hour and
half a carton of ice cream had passed, and they were still sitting together in
Liz's floor, having a girl-talk marathon. Everything that had happened in the
time that they were separated, they had discussed. Liz was trying to make sense
of everything she had been through, and Maria was lightening the mood with her
funny tales of Alex's life misadventures.
"So have
you..found anyone? You know, the one that 'lights your fire', so to
speak."
Maria shook
her head.
"Nope.
I've dated a lot..mostly jerks, though. Not exactly a garden variety of
wonderful guys here in Roswell, but some of 'em are okay. Nobody I'd want to
spend the rest of my life with, though."
"Me
neither. After all of the guys I went through back in college, I'm not sure if
I ever want to have sex again in my life."
Maria dipped
into the ice cream again, shoving the heaping spoonful into her mouth.
"Yeah."
Liz sighed,
thinking again of earlier.
"Well..I
guess there are some exeptions."
Maria
grinned.
"Like
some certain doctors?"
"I don't
know…maybe. There was just something about him. Something that.."
"Made
your heart go pitter-patter?"
Liz laughed.
"Yeah,
sort of."
"I think
you should call him."
Her eyes
widened, and she shook her head quickly.
"No. No
way. He'll probably think I'm..some sort of weird stalker or something."
"Liz,
you'd be crazy not to. I mean..like you said, he did something amazing today.
We don't understand it, but it was special. He's special! And the way he looked
at you…the look on his face when you were hugging…I can assure you, he would
not mind hearing from you at all."
Chapter 5 The
hollow ringing of the phone buzzed in her ear, droning on and on until she felt
like she would scream. Sighing, she placed the received gently down on the
cradle. Tried to ignore the disappointment that was slowly seeping into her
heart.
"Not
home."
Maria
frowned, shaking her blonde head vigorously.
"We'll
get him later, then."
Liz propped
her elbows onto her crossed legs, focusing on the floor and desperately
avoiding Maria's seeking gaze.
"We
will."
It was the
day after the accident, and Maria was staying with Liz above the Crashdown. Her
dad's death had left her the café and all of his money. It was enough to keep
her comfortable for the rest of her life. Sometimes, comfortable just wasn't
enough.
His memory
still haunted her sometimes when she walked the empty hallways, or roamed the
kitchens late at night. There were times when she remembered him so vividly,
sitting at the bar and listening to Oldies, doing the books. Most of all, she
remembered how much she'd wanted him to give her more privacy.
She would
give anything to have him with her right now.
Maria was all
she had left now, and she had almost lost her too. It just taught her to hold
on with a firmer grasp.
She gazed
fondly at Maria, who was absentmindedly playing with a strand of her hair.
"I'm
sorry, Maria," she whispered softly.
Her best
friend only smiled at her.
"You've
said that already, silly. You know I love you. And love is forgiveness."
She smiled at her friend's simple words.
"Thank
you."
The phone was
ringing again, and she held it nervously in her right hand. She was beginning
to think that he was purposely ignoring her. She was about to hang up when he answered.
Finally. That same deep, gravelly voice that'd been taunting her over the past
week was playing in her ear, making her smile.
"Hello?"
"Hey."
He paused,
and she pulled in a breath.
"It's
Liz."
He still
didn't answer.
"Liz
Parker. From the…."
"Hospital.
I knew who it was."
She was hurt
by his tone, but tried not to dwell on something so little.
"How's
your friend?"
She frowned
again. Not exactly the thing she wanted to talk about.
"She's
good. Perfect, in fact. Same old Maria."
"That's
good."
Another
awkward silence left her searching for the purpose she'd actually called.
"Oh,
yeah….umm…I was wondering…"
Maria made a
little hand signal to her.
"Do you
want to have dinner sometime?"
She could
hear his breath come out in a whoosh, which worried her.
"I…don't
think that would be such a good idea."
She shrugged
at Maria, who made another signal.
"Coffee
then?"
"No…really,
I'm just so busy.."
She could
hear his resolve melting away, and smiled a little.
"C'mon.
Just a cup of coffee couldn't hurt. I'd just like to..talk with you."
"Well…n.."
"I won't
take no for an answer."
This time,
she could hear his smile.
"I was
going to say nine o'clock okay with you?"
Part 6
A beep sounded distantly from somewhere in the house, perhaps the drier or the
alarm on the oven. She jumped a little at the noise, the hot curler bumping
against the creamy flesh of her neck. Yanking it away, she pulled the strand of
silky dark hair free of the stick, laughing uneasily.
It had been
quite awhile since she'd done this.
Maria stood
behind her, her mirror image standing tall before Liz, smiling back at her.
Calming her fluttering stomach. Easing her nerves.
Her rock, her
pillar of strength, just like she had always been. Even in the hard times.
She tossed
her best friend a bright smile, and attempted another curl. Her eyes drifted
back to girl standing behind her, and the iron drooped down to her bare
shoulder.
"Damn!"
Pain seared
through her skin. The offending curling iron clattered down upon the vanity's
top, knocking off a tube of lipstick.
She turned
her head to inspect her shoulder, wincing when she saw the small red welt that
was already beginning to form.
She looked
back up and found Maria gone. "Maria?"
And then she
was back again, smiling reassuringly and clutching a little green leaf in her
hand.
Leaning down
over Liz protectively, she broke open the leaf and squeezed out some gel onto
her finger, massaging it lightly over the burn.
Liz smiled in
thanks, reluctantly returning to the task of her hair. Her hand curled around
the iron, and she heard Maria's soft laugh behind her.
"Let
me."
And then she
had taken over, grabbing the tool from her hand, busying herself around her
head.
Liz just
watched her lovingly, and wondered how she'd managed to get so very lucky.
The car idled
for a moment before she turned the key, shifting her gaze over to her passenger
as she did.
"So?"
Liz glanced
over at her, eyes darting wildly around the small car.
"So…what?"
She placed a
reassuring hand on her shoulder, and Liz felt the surge of calm flow through
her. She'd certainly missed Maria's healing touch.
"Nervous?"
Liz placed a
featherlight kiss on Maria's finger, reaching up to grasp her hand within her
own.
"Not
anymore."
Maria looked
down, and then back up at her. Her eyes shone in the darkness of the car.
"I've
missed you, Lizzie."
She could
hear the tears in her voice.
"Me
too."
Squeezing her
hand, she reached for the door handle.
"Lizzie?"
Looked back
at Maria, who still looked like she would cry.
"Hmm?"
"It's
just coffee."
She smiled
softly at her, then nudged her out of the door.
Liz stepped
out, her gaze lingering on the little red car as it drove away into the night.
A pleasant
hum filled the air of the small coffee shop, the voices of the evening regulars
all buzzing simultaneously.
She inhaled
deeply, smiling at the rich sent of coffee.
Her eyes
scanned the room and she instantly spotted him, sitting in the corner back
booth where somehow she'd known he'd be.
He hadn't
seen her yet and she paused a moment, looking down again to assess her
clothing. Tight black pants, fuzzy red sweater. Perfect.
She looked up
again then, head held high with confidence, and walked back to where he sat.
"Hi."
He looked up
at her, those beautiful eyes piercing her momentarily, burning her as they
scanned her body.
She grinned.
"Hi,"
he repeated.
He sounded a
little bit surprised.
She slid
easily into the seat across from him, dropping her purse from her shoulder and
crossing her legs under the table.
He was
staring at the table, at his hands. She was staring at him.
"Dr.
Evans?"
And then he
looked up at her again, straight into her eyes.
"Max."
She smiled at
him, the smile she'd used at college when she met guys in bars.
"Okay."
The silence
stretched between them again. She was beginning to wonder what had been there
before that wasn't now.
"Max?"
He was still
staring at her, into her almost.
"Yeah?"
"Why did
you agree to come here?"
Another
pause, and he averted his eyes, looking back down at his hands. She did the
same. He had wonderful hands. Looked back up at her. She didn't have to be looking
at him to know.
"I'm not
sure. Why did you ask me here?"
Raised her
eyes to meet his again. Found herself imagining things about those hands…
"There
was just something about you."
He looked
intrigued. Scary.
"What do
you mean?"
"Like….the
way you looked at me. The way you said my name. The way you helped us.
Maria…"
Now he looked
almost afraid.
"I'm a
doctor. I'm supposed to help people."
She shook her
head lightly, slowly.
"No. Not
like that. She was in a coma, Max. She was going to die. I saw her get run
over. I was there. Dammit, I was the one who sent her out on the road. But
you….you fixed her, somehow. When there was no chance, you made one."
He just
continued to stare at her, his expression now unreadable.
"I
wanted to thank you."
She could
finally see his smile.
"You're
welcome."
A waiter came
by their table, asked them what they'd like. He ordered a cappucino and she
ordered a Caramel Frappucino.
Max laughed
as she did, saying when the waiter left that only girls drank frozen coffee.
"I'm a
girl."
He smirked.
"I
noticed."
She laughed
quietly, placing her hands on the table. Glanced at his again.
"Eliz.."
"Liz."
She earned
another smile.
"Liz.
I'm glad you asked me here."
"I'm
glad you came."
He placed one
of his hands over hers. "I like your hands."
"I like
your sweater."
She laughed.
"Thanks."
"I'd
like to take it off."
Part 7 The
straw fell from her lips and dropped against the empty bottom of the plastic
cup.
"Done."
He laughed.
"Three?
In an hour? And you won't be..wired?"
She grinned.
"Nope."
He scooted
closer to her.
She didn't
quite remember how it was that she'd ended up on his side of the booth. Or his
lap, for that matter. Well, practically. Something about her sweater…
His hand
played on her thigh. Her neck tingled.
"I'd
hate to see you with the hard stuff."
Her hand was
on his neck, playing with the soft hair at the nape.
"Yeah,
me too."
He nuzzled
her cheek. She could feel the slightest hint of stubble on his chin, scratching
her lightly. More tingling.
She found
herself looking at the young man who had been their waiter, stacking chairs on
a tabletop. It reminded her of the old days, working at the Crashdown. A soft
smile played at her lips.
The boy
looked at her, hunger in his eyes. She winked at him.
Max's
rumbling laugh tickled her ear.
"Stop
playing around with his head."
"Mm..but
it's so easy."
"I can
see how it would be."
Max's hot
breath on her neck, then his lips. They were incredibly soft.
"I think
they're closing."
"Oh."
"Wanna
get out of here?"
He didn't
move from his spot.
"Sure."
She tried to
keep track of her thoughts as he nibbled at her skin.
"Where
we going?"
"My
place," he murmured.
"Okay."
Gently
pushing him away, she smiled.
"We
better go."
His hair was
messed up.
"Yeah."
She slid out,
leaning across to grab her purse. He rested his hand on her back, sliding it
down and cupping her ass for a moment before moving it back up.
She felt more
than tingles.
They walked
out together, and he grabbed her hand.
"Your
car?"
"Maria
brought me."
"Right."
Led her to
his car, opened the door for her.
The door
opened into the darkness of the house, and he stepped inside, easily finding
the switch.
Dim light
filled the room, and she looked around appreciatively. It was gorgeous.
Spacious rooms, expensive furniture, tasteful art. Definitely high class.
"Nice."
He threw his
keys down on the small table by the door, took her purse and placed it down
too.
"Thanks."
She walked
inside more, into the living room, running her hand softly along the leather of
the couch.
"Where's
your bedroom?"
She turned and
checked his face for surprise. There was none. "Down the hall, to the
right."
"'Kay."
She
disappeared down the hallway, veering off into the first door she came too.
"That's
not…" he called.
"I
know."
The door
closed behind her, and he heard it lock. He thought that he could understand
why she'd want a bathroom after all those frappucinos.
He stood
there for a moment, surveying the hallway that he'd walked down a million times
before, wondering why it suddenly looked so different. So much better.
His skin
still tingled, crackled with electricity. His lips burned. And the rest of him…
It was almost
scary, the things that this woman was doing to him. Not that he minded.
Planning had
always been his way of life. Until now. Things just kept coming at him, flying
torwards him so quickly that there was only a split second left to make each
decision.
At that
moment, he felt sure that he'd made the right ones. After all, he had possibly
the most beautiful woman on earth in his house. In his bathroom. And her next
stop was his bedroom.
He padded
down the hallway, gaze lingering on the bathroom door as he passed. No sounds
were coming out, and he wondered if she was beginning to have doubts. He hoped
to hell not.
The day came
to mind again. The day he'd broken all of his rules. When he'd used his powers,
healed someone, fallen in love.
She had come
into that hospital, heartbroken and pleading, and left with his heart. He'd
risked everythign for someone he barely knew. That had to mean something. That
had to mean that what he was doing tonight was right.
The little
Isabel voice in his head was telling him no. He told her to shut the hell up.
Opening his
bedroom door, he was relieved to see that it was neat. The bed was made. Clean
sheets.
Flicked on
the light, threw some dirty clothes into the corner. Slicked back his hair and
took a deep breath. He couldn't take his eyes off of the bed.
There was a
noise from the hallway, and he heard her soft footsteps approaching the room.
He didn't turn
around even when he felt her, standing behind him in the doorway.
She didn't
say anything as she walked up to him, around him. Her eyes did not meet his,
but rested on his chest, firm and toned beneath the sweater he wore.
Finally, they
drifted up to his. The passion in her eyes, the fire that burned him from where
she stood took his breath away.
He stared at
her, this beautiful woman in front of him. He wanted nothing more than to kiss
her. He ached for her. Could he deny himself the pleasure of his lips on hers?
The question was answered when she took the first step. Leaning forward with
her face, she placed her lips on his. It was like a shockwave from a really
large explosion.
He welcomed
her kiss, knowing this shouldn't be happeneing, and not caring. He found his
way into her mouth, caressing her tongue with his. He felt his arousal stir.
She was a Goddess. He wanted her, wanted her with so much force it scared him.
Liz was
enjoying him. A lot. She'd been meaning to kiss him since the first time she
saw him, standing there in the waiting room. She slid one hand up his chest,
reaching for his cheek. She cupped his cheek, and brought him even closer. Her
chest pressed against his, her nipples hardening immediately.
He could feel
her nipples straining through the thin material of her sweater. It made him
feel even more aroused, knowing that she felt the same things he did.
Pulling back
from their kiss, he looked at her questioningly. She knew what he asked for,
she nodded her approval.
Liz raised her
arms so Max could remove her shirt. He did it slowly, gliding over her bare
skin as much as possible. She wore no bra, and the sight of her took his breath
away. Her breasts were perfect. He had to touch them. He grazed her right
nipple, and Liz's breath caught in her throat. His touch was so soft, so
gentle.
Max took his
time exploring her chest. He wanted to savor every moment. Liz was the
impatient one, it seemed. It was she who removed his shirt, and went straight
for the zipper on his pants. He was amused by her urgency. Guiding her hand
with his, he let her release him from the restraing material.
His erection
was apparent in her hand. Liz was sort of surprised by it. She got over her
fear quickly, and ran her hand up and down the shaft. Max couldn't wait any
longer. He removed the remainder of their clothing, and had her lie down next
to him.
One last
questioning look, one last nod of approval, and he entered her. Her moist flesh
welcomed him. Her walls stretched to accomodate his length.
They moved
together, flesh against flesh. She reveled at the feel of his naked form,
melded against her. They rocked back and forth, he was pounding into her. Not
hard, but enough pressure to make them feel amazing. She felt herself being
driven over the edge. When she could take it no longer, she cried out.
Max felt her
contract around him as she came. That sensation took him to the top with her.
They came as one, one unit of ecstasy. The end had been explosive, driving them
both mad. They lay together for a moment, neither of them moving. They had no
desire to break the contact, the connection.
He closed his
eyes, and breathed in. The scent of her filled him, wonderful and sweet and
musky.
He exhaled
the breath he'd been holding for years now.
His hot
breath tickled her face, and the smiled to herself as her eyes drifted shut and
she fell asleep.
Part 8
Her eyes opened to the steely darkness of the room, the darkness the enveloped
her, frightened her. She was terrified of the dark.
She almost
cried out, but choked back the sound when he shifted against her. His strong
arm wrapped around her waist, chiseled face buried in her neck.
She was safe.
Finally.
She
remembered being a little girl, when her dad had tucked her in at night. She'd
always been so afraid for him to leave, for the light to leave with him. But
too proud to tell him.
So she'd lie
there, hours on end, just shivering in fright and repeating to herself that
nothing bad was in her room.
It was
something she'd never outgrown. A feeling she'd always had, until now.
She felt as
if nothing could touch her while she was in his arms, like she could do
anything. She could welcome the darkness.
She wondered
if she would still be able to once he was gone.
She was
thinking again of the change, as she half-comically referred to it in her mind.
Her life after everything had gone so suddenly downhill. The bad-girl version
of Liz Parker, the uncensored copy.
She sort of
reminded herself of that girl again now, the girl she'd sworn off that day in
the hospital waiting for the news that Maria was dead. Knowing that it was
completely her fault. Praying to God and promising that if Maria could only
live, she would never go back to that girl again.
And here she
was, wrapped up in Max Evans' arms, a doctor she'd met not a week ago. Naked in
his bed.
Still wanting
him, even then. Yet another promise she'd broken. She tried to tell herself
that it didn't matter. Or that it wasn't true. That what she was doing wasn't
wrong.
The things
that she felt for this man-the feelings he had stirred inside of her, even from
that first simple glance, those words he'd said to her…they were overwhelming.
She truly felt that she might possibly love him. But it still felt wrong.
She wondered
if she could handle doing it all over again. Of course, it wouldn't be the
same. In a way, yes. But wasn't it worth it…the risk, if it meant maybe finding
true love?
She could not
answer her own question. If only she knew that answer had already been decided.
His eyes
darted open suddenly. He was panting slightly, a hangover from some dream he'd
been having.
The phone
rang again, shrilly breaking the silence of the room, hurting his ears.
Carefully
reaching across the sleeping beauty in his arms, he grabbed the cordless that
sat on the bedside table.
"Hello?"
There was a
pause at the other end of the line, and a string of curses lie in wait on his
tongue.
"Max?"
They
disappeared slowly, and he was left with nothing but sheer exasperation.
"What is
it, Izzy?"
He knew she
understood what that tone meant, and he certainly hoped that she would take a
hint.
"Max,
what's going on?"
He sighed
heavily, shifting a little against Liz.
"What
are you talking about?"
"With
you, Max? Who are you with?"
His eyes
drifted involuntarily to her. A smile tugged at his lips. She was breathtaking.
"A
woman."
It was
Isabel's turn to sigh.
"Let's
hope so. Who?"
"Liz
Parker."
There was no
use lying to his sister. They both knew the abilities they had, as aliens. To
sense each other's feelings…strong emotions. He was pretty sure he'd been
giving some off earlier. Very strong.
"Who in
the hell is Liz Parker?"
He rolled his
eyes at her outburst.
"A woman
I met awhile ago."
"Oh, so
you just decided that since you met her 'awhile' ago, it was fine to go ahead
and fuck her?"
His hand was
drawn to his throbbing temple. He wondered how she managed to give him a
headache to quickly.
"Isabel.."
"I will
not calm down, Max."
"Pl.."
"You
cannot do this."
He sighed in
resignation.
"I
know."
He could tell
he had shocked his sister.
"Huh?"
"I know.
I've known all along, Izzy. Do you think I've forgotten? You,
Micheal…everything? Never. I just…had to find out."
"Find
out what?"
Her voice was
softer now. He wanted to hate her for the sympathy he could tell she felt.
"If I
loved her."
"And?"
"I
do."
He hung up
then, softly placing the phone back onto its base. As he pulled his arm back
across the bed, his arm brushed across her bare breast. A tingle ran up the
length of his arm, and he closed his eyes.
Wondering how
he would ever let her go.
Liz listened
to his conversation, never opening her eyes. Even though she heard only Max,
she knew what was going on. She'd known the moment she started this. That it
had to end.
He was
talking to someone, apparently someone close to him. She wondered momentarily
if it was his girlfriend. 'Izzy' he called her. She felt sick.
And she
wondered at her jealousy. She didn't have the right. It was just sex. Nothing
more.
She thought
for the first time of earlier that night, and recalled Maria in the car.
No…it wasn't
sex. It was coffee. Just coffee.
The next
thing she remembered was waking up, for the 3rd time that morning.
The bright
afternoon sunlight was streaming through the thin curtains, streaming through
her closed lids and reminding her of what today would hold.
Her
heartbreak.
She finally
opened her eyes to the sunlight. She didn't want the sun to be shining. She
wanted it to rain, she needed the rain. The rain could wash away everything,
give her a new beginning. She could forget everything that had happened all of
these horrible years, and start again. Nothing would have to be the same ever
again.
She didn't
even have to turn around to know that he was gone. She'd known even as she
slept, somehow.
And even
before she moved, or stood, she knew there was a note on the pillow. His
pillow, the one he had rested his head upon only the night before. The pillow
that would now be empty, save that note.
His goodbye
note, words from a coward too afraid to face her with the truth. Did he think
that she wouldn't know? That she wouldn't understand?
She
understood better than anyone. It couldn't work. It could never work. Something
in both of them would hold it back, forever, until both of them broke. It was
better this way. It was he who did not understand.
She waited
just one more minute before she finally stood, soaked in the feeling of his bed
and the soft sheets, of lying there for just that short time and knowing how it
felt.
Then she did
stand, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed and pulling herself up,
willing her legs to hold her up even though she felt as if she could fall. She
wasn't weak. She wouldn't allow herself to be weak.
She dressed
quickly, brushing her hair and putting it back into a messy bun. She wore no
makeup.
Slipped on
her shoes, grabbed her purse from the table by the front door and quietly slipped
out.
She never
read the note that he had left.
She never
looked back.
Part 9 He
waited until she was gone before he came back. He'd been watching, parked in
his car behind the bushes at the end of the road.
He felt weak,
and sad, and empty. Like a coward.
He'd let her
go…let her go without a word. There was no goodbye, no last kiss, nothing. Just
a note. He hoped that she could understand. He wasn't sure that he did.
When she
finally passed, driving slowly by in her car, her expression blank and her face
pale, he drove out from behind the bushes. He headed for his home.
When he
walked into the bedroom, his eye fell upon it immediately. Still in the same
position as he had left it, lying upon the pillow this morning. Untouched.
Unexpected
tears welled up in his eyes. She had not even read his note.
She would
never know.
Small,
measured steps and then he was beside the bed, trembling hand reaching out to
delicately seize the small sheet of paper. Sparse words, but so much said.
Words she would never read.
'Dearest Liz,
Please, try
to understand why I must do this. Know that you do mean something to me, and it
wasn't just a one night stand. There was so much more. But nothing else can
ever happen between us. I can't exactly explain why, but I hope that in time,
you can forgive me. Maybe we'll run into each other again.
I love you.
Max.'
The only
sound to be heard in the room was the ripping of paper.
The steps
seemed to go on forever as she climbed them, looming above her. Her legs were
aching already. She longed for rest.
Maria
appeared in the doorway, her face concerned, rushing down to meet her.
"Liz?"
She didn't
answer her, just kept on walking. She just wanted to get upstairs. She wanted
to sleep. She wanted to never wake up again. The door was before her, a giant
welcome. The bed was just a little ahead, and she began to walk faster as she
approached it.
"Liz?"
Maria's voice
was louder this time, but she barely heard it. It was drowned out by the
thoughts in her head, so loud that they overpowered everything else. Rolling
and tumbling around and around each other, like a spin cycle inside her brain.
She wished she could turn them off.
She dropped
onto the bed, pulling her legs closely to her, breathing in and closing her
eyes to the delicious sleep that was already overcoming her.
"Liz?"
She didn't
even open her eyes to look at Maria. She could see her in her mind, standing in
the doorway of the room, staring down at her worriedly. It was almost
irritating.
"What?"
She heard her
sigh of relief, and the soft sound of carpet as she stepped closer.
"What
happened?"
"It was
coffee. Just coffee."
She knew at
that moment that she would never be able to keep her promise. As hard as she
wanted to take it back, the change had happened in her. It had been something
that had taken her over so completely, that she would never be able to reverse
it. Even though it hurt her, and hurt those around her. Those she had once
loved so dearly.
She could
never be the old Liz Parker. There was no more rain, nothing more that could
cleanse it all away. She was left with the aftermath. She was left with the new
Liz Parker.
And she
couldn't help but think that the new Liz Parker was the Liz that Max had known.
She didn't want to let that go, either.
When she said
nothing else, she could hear Maria moving away from her. She had figured it
out, too.
The truth
about everything. About life, perhaps.
Maybe she had
figured it out long before Liz had. Maybe that was why she'd said goodbye last night
in the car. Maybe it was why she'd said it was 'just coffee.' Because it was
anything but.
It wasn't
just coffee.
It was the
rest of her life.
She heard
Maria walk through the door, pulling it shoftly shut behind her. Gently
clicking off the overhead light as she left.
And when the
light had gone, and Liz was left alone in the dark with only her thoughts, she
thougth again of her fear.
Standing up,
she turned the light back on.
Now she had
the answer to her question.