MOTHER

Mother,
Can't you hear me,
Crying out?
Dying inside,
For your approval.
Can't you see me,
Pushing myself as far as I can go?
& then some,
For your praise.
Mother,
Can't you tell,
I'm ruining my life,
To make yours happier?
I guess you can't.
Or maybe you can,
But just don't care.
Mother,
I carry all your high expectations for me,
On my shoulders.
Always trying to measure up,
But never quite trying hard enough,
According to you.
Mother,
Can't you hear me,
Screaming inside my mind,
Trying to get you to hear me?
Can't you see the pain,
Hidden in my eyes?
Of course you can't,
You closed your eyes,
And your mind,
Against me,
A long, long time ago.
I might as well be invisible,
For the amount you notice me,
When I want you to.
The only time you do notice me,
Is when I do,
Something wrong.
That's the only time you notice me,
& then,
I don't want you to.
Mother.