(My Sunglasses Were Burger King)
I.
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She was lesbian Wicca My sunglasses were Burger King This might pose a challenge To our church retreat fling |
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Her plan was to convert us Baptist Fundamentalists Mine was to baptize her And tie her up by her wrists |
II.
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My tastes run to girls, too And Christian evangelism But it was my sense of fashion That opened the first schism |
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She mixed me up a potion That smelled of formaldehyde So from the sun's blinding rays I'd no longer need to hide |
III.
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Breaking my sad addiction To Burger King design Required all of Saturday Leaving precious little time |
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To work my own little magic A deviously sly trick To break her sad addiction To muff-diving broomsticks |
IV.
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Sunday would be our big day For converting the heathens By dunking them in water We'd pave their way to Heaven |
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When came my witch's turn To bathe in holy water It took the entire church To hold her body under |
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She screamed to Holy Jesus! Swallowed by fire and brimstone I found myself much aroused As the Devil took her home |
V.
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I think of her quite often As I'm staring at the sun Where would my life be Without her magic potion? |
