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Chapter 4: A Birthday Another week had passed, and Michaela was staying home from town today as she was feeling a bit under the weather. This pregnancy was taking its toll on her, but she knew that in the end, it would all be completely worth it. Sully had taken Colleen out to the reservation to help stitch up a couple of cuts that Michaela trusted she could do by herself. If she could extract a bullet alone, she could suture up a wound. Brian had tagged along, and Sully had taken the twins too in order to give his wife a much needed break. Neither Michaela nor Colleen had gotten any new information from Annie about the rape, but it was becoming obviously clear that she just wanted to forget that it ever happened and move on. She hadn’t come around yet, and still stayed in her room, but Michaela was sure that she would be feeling like her old self soon. She was starting to talk more and more about her family. She was no longer crying herself to sleep at night, and the Sully family was sure that it was because of the fact that she had people around who cared about her. Fortunately, she was beginning to trust Sully. He had brought her up a plate of food on a few occasions when Michaela’s back had been too sore to walk up the stairs. She was beginning to become thankful toward him for being so concerned. On this day, Michaela was feeling a little better than she had been earlier in the morning, so she was fixing stew for her family for when they returned home the reservation, which she expected to be within the next hour. She had let Wolf and Pup out to frolic around earlier, and she could hear that they were chasing after the chickens, which she couldn’t do anything about right now. As she was stirring, she heard the steps on the stairs creaking as Annie walked down. Michaela smiled at her. The young girl had begun to gain weight, and was looking quite healthy for being so weak when she had arrived on their doorstep not very long ago. “Hello Annie.” “Need help?” she wondered. Michaela knew the girl wanted to feel useful, and the best thing to do was to keep her busy now that she was making an attempt at ordinary interaction. “I could use a little help. Would you mind dicing up those potatoes?” Annie nodded, happy to be of some help. “You’ve been real kind to me. Your whole family has. I wish I could repay ya.” “There’s nothing to repay, Annie. We’re glad to have you with us.” Annie smiled, feeling wanted and accepted for the first time in a very long while. She sat down at the table and began to dice up the potatoes that Michaela had already peeled and needed for the stew. After a few moments, Michaela heard the girl’s voice again. “Dr. . .” “You can call me Dr. Mike or Michaela. Whichever you prefer, that is.” Annie swallowed hard. “Dr. Mike, I’m scared.” “Of?” “I’m scared he’s going to come find me.” “Who? George?” Annie nodded. Michaela took the pot off of the heat for a while as to be able to sit and talk with this girl. Once she was seated comfortably across from her, she reached out and touched the girl’s shaking hand. Annie placed the knife down on the table. “We won’t let him hurt you again,” Michaela whispered. “You’re safe here. You need to understand that. I know it’s hard to trust again after what’s happened to you, but soon I think it’ll be time for you to try.” “I do trust you. You’ve all been so nice to me, and I feel like I’m intrudin’.” “You’re not intruding in any way, Annie,” Michaela insisted. “We want you to stay for as long as you need.” She paused. It wasn’t too long ago that she had promised Sully that they’d send her to a special home if there was no change. That idea had gone out the window, however, when she had started talking more and more with those who would visit her in her room. “Soon, I will be a mother,” she whispered. “I don’t know how!” “Annie, you know there are people out there who would love to have your baby if you can’t take care of it.” “I don’t want my baby goin’ to strangers, but I ain’t so sure I can be a ma.” “You’re young, Annie, and I’m not going to lie to you. Being a mother is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it’s also one of the most wonderful. But you being so young is an important factor. You’re fourteen years old, and you haven’t even had a chance to really be a child.” “What am I gonna do?” Annie asked. “No boy’s ever gonna look at me after this! Everyone ‘round here’s gotta know what happened to me.” Unfortunately, she was correct about the last part. The townsfolk had somehow found out about the rape of Annie Black, and now that they knew, they were sympathetic. “You should know by now that what happened to you wasn’t your fault. You don’t have to tell anyone you meet in the future what happened to you if you don’t want to.” “But I’m gonna have a baby. They’re gonna know. They’re gonna think . . .” She began to cry, and Michaela moved to pull the girl into her arms. Annie didn’t pull away this time. She held onto Michaela and cried so hard that Michaela wasn’t sure she’d ever stop. Michaela gently rocked back and forth with this young girl in her arms, consoling her as if she were a child of her own. It broke Michaela’s heart to know that this young, innocent life was about to bring another innocent life into the world without a father or a mother who was in the right state of mind. Annie loved her baby, it was obvious, but Michaela wasn’t quite sure about the care she could possibly provide. “Don’t think about that now, sweetheart,” she whispered. “It’s going to be alright.” Annie pulled back slowly, and Michaela brushed her tears away with her thumb. “I’m sorry.” “There’s nothing to be sorry for,” Michaela replied soothingly. “Just focus on keeping yourself strong for your baby. Annie nodded, and sniffled. “Why don’t you go upstairs and rest?” “I want to help,” she insisted. Michaela smiled knowingly and nodded, knowing what it was like to be pregnant and want to feel useful instead of resting all of the time. Michaela went to put the stew back on the heat, but she as she was about to do so, Annie gasped. Michaela turned in alarm. “Annie?!” “It hurts!” she cried. Michaela knew it wouldn’t be good for Annie to climb the stairs right now, but she needed her to be comfortable. “Can you stand?” Annie nodded quickly, and put her arm around Michaela. The two expectant mothers started up the stairway, and once they reached Matthew’s bedroom, Annie climbed into bed. Michaela rushed to her room to get the medical bag. Annie was gripping her belly and crying in pain when Michaela returned. “Alright,” Michaela soothed, gently stroking the girl’s forehead. “It’s alright. I need to examine you. Will you let me?” Annie gave her an unsure look, but gripped the doctor’s hand. “You can trust me Annie. I need to do what I can to fix this, but I won’t know what to fix unless I examine you.” Annie choked back a sob, and finally nodded. She gripped the sides of the beds as the pain rushed through her again. Michaela began a thorough examination of the girl, and a few minutes later, she walked over to a wash basin to wash her hands. “What’s wrong?” Annie wondered, drying her eyes. “Everything seems to be normal.” “The pain’s gone.” “That’s good. I’m sure it was just your body warning you that it’s time to slow down and try to relax.” “How am I s’pose to relax?” Annie wondered. “Just know you’re safe,” Michaela replied, walking back over to her patient. She took out her stethoscope to listen to Annie’s heartbeat. “Also know that you’re strong and healthy.” Annie still didn’t look convinced. Michaela knew exactly what to do now. She put the end of the stethoscope against Annie’s belly and found the baby’s heartbeat. It was one of the most assuring things to Michaela when she would feel nervous about her condition. “Would you like to hear your baby’s heartbeat?” “I’m allowed? I thought just the doctor could do that,” Annie questioned. Michaela chuckled a little. “Of course! You’re the mother, and the most deserving person to hear the baby’s heart.” She put the earpieces into the girl’s ears, and a few moments later, Annie’s eyes lit up. “Oh wow! That’s my baby?” “That’s your baby. He or she is strong and healthy. You’re taking better care of yourself, and I’m sure your baby appreciates that.” Annie sighed with a smile on her face, and Michaela put the stethoscope away. “Dr. Mike?” “Hmm?” “I know this baby wasn’t made in wedlock or nothin’ like that. I know it wasn’t even made in the way it’s s’pose to happen, but hearin’ that heartbeat tells me that everything is gonna be alright. I can’t help but love this baby, but I ain’t sure I’ll ever be able to look at it without thinkin’ ‘bout what George did to me and what his pa did too.” “When you first look into your child’s eyes, Annie, what you’re going to see is a child you kept safe for nine months; a child who depends completely on you. Hopefully you can look past all of the pain and see your child for all of its innocence. This baby didn’t ask to be created, and you didn’t ask for what happened to you.” “I hope you’re right,” Annie whispered, rubbing her belly softly. “Get some rest now, Annie. I’ll finish lunch and bring some up to you later.” Annie nodded. Just as Michaela was leaving the door, she spoke up again. “Dr. Mike?” “Yes?” Michaela asked, turning to her. Annie gave her a small smile. “Thanks.” Michaela nodded, a smile spreading across her face as well. She closed the door and started down the stairs just as Sully and the kids arrived home. Colleen, who was still a bit sore at her parents, went right to the stove to finish fixing lunch so her mother could rest. Though she was still a bit angry, she couldn’t help but want to keep her mother as relaxed as possible. “How were things at the reservation?” Michaela asked as Sully closed the door with his foot seeing as he had two sleeping toddlers in his arms. “Went good,” Sully replied. “The boys played with Early Sun, and Colleen did a good job fixin’ up some cuts.” “I’m pleased to hear that,” Michaela replied with a smile. She stood on her tip-toes to kiss her husband, and he met her half way, bending down to press his lips against hers. “We went into town,” Brian spoke up. “You did?” Michaela wondered. “What for?” “We wanted to check with Horace about Annie.” “Any word?” “None,” Sully replied with a sigh. “Seems like nobody around is related to her or claimin’ her.” “Is it ‘cause she’s havin’ a baby?” Brian wondered. Michaela shrugged her shoulders. “It’s possible considering the word has gotten out, but it’s also possible that she truly has no family left around these parts.” “Is she gonna live with us?” Brian asked. “For good?” Michaela and Sully exchanged glances. “I don’t think it’s time to be talking about that, Brian.” “Why not? You could adopt her like you adopted me, Colleen, and Matthew.” “It ain’t like that, Brian,” Sully explained, walking over to place the sleeping boys in a wing-backed chair. “Annie’s gotta decide what she wants to do.” Sully walked over to stand behind his wife, and his hand moved around to caress her belly. Brian walked over to get bowls out of the cupboard so Colleen could serve lunch. Michaela took Sully’s hand and led him away from Colleen and Brian’s earshot. “What’s wrong?” “Annie had an episode today.” “What kinda episode?” “She was experiencing some pain and cramping. I think it was due to all of the stress she’s been under lately; all the trauma.” “Is she okay? The baby?” “They both seem to be perfectly healthy and normal now that Annie’s under a warm roof and getting food on a regular basis.” “What are you thinkin’ about?” Sully wondered. Michaela chewed thoughtfully on her bottom lip for a moment. After a long pause, Sully crossed his arms over his chest. “Michaela?” She looked up into his eyes. “Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea if she stayed her. I mean, we have the extra room.” “You mean, you want her livin’ here permanently?” “She’s coming around, Sully. You’ve seen it yourself. I want to be there for her, and she’s going to need my help once the baby’s born.” “You’re forgettin’ somethin’ Michaela. You’re havin’ our own baby around the same time she is. You ain’t gonna have time for all this you’re suggestin’ of takin’ on.” “I can manage, Sully.” “We ain’t talkin’ bout getting a new puppy or somethin’. This ain’t gonna be easy.” “Sully,” Michaela replied softly, putting her hand on his cheek. “Annie is so scared, and I want to help her.” “What about your own family, Michaela?” “What?” “Yeah, I know Annie needs special attention, but she only wants so much ‘til she shuts herself up again. What about your own family? You’re puttin’ your family behind all of this.” “You know I took an oath when I became a doctor,” Michaela pointed out. “Yeah. You did. But ya also took an oath on the day we got married.” Sully started toward the door. “Where are you doing?” Michaela demanded. “I’m goin’ to clean out the stables.” “What about lunch?” “I ain’t hungry,” Sully replied, walking out the door and shutting it loudly. Colleen and Brian turned to look at Michaela. “What happened?” Brian asked. Michaela brushed a tear off of her cheek and shook her head. “Nothing that you two should concern yourselves with.” “Lunch looks ‘bout almost ready, except for the potatoes,” Colleen pointed out. “I’ll get those fixed up.” “Thank you. I’ll be in shortly.” Michaela turned to walk out the front door, a heavy guilt starting to lie within the pit of her stomach. When she walked into the barn, Sully was sitting on a large bale of hay, fidgeting with his tomahawk. He looked up to see Michaela standing in the doorway of the barn with one hand on her back and the other on her pregnant belly. “We need to talk, I assume,” she said quietly as she walked over to him. She lowered herself down onto the bale of hay, and Sully reached out to help her. “I’m sorry if I’ve seemed to be putting you and the children second. I honestly didn’t think that was happening. How long have you been feeling like this?” “Not very long,” Sully admitted. “It’s just that for the past few days, Annie seems to be the only thing on your mind. She’s the first person ya check on in the mornin’, and the last person ya check on at night. You’re always so tired when we go to bed, that I don’t even get to kiss ya goodnight.” Michaela sighed heavily, knowing her husband was right. “I’m sorry,” she whispered softly. “I’m trying to balance every part of my life equally, and unfortunately, it’s not happening. Annie’s doing so much better, and I know she doesn’t need my complete focus every day. She even came downstairs today on her own. She’s starting to feel better about the baby.” “I’m sorry I was so harsh with ya inside. I didn’t mean to say what I said about takin’ oaths.” “You were right. I did take an oath when we were married, but Sully, sometimes I have to reach out to someone. You know how I feel about this situation.” “I do know. I also know that I hate what happened to her. But ya can’t fix everything by yourself. Ya gotta give her some space and stop checkin’ in on her every hour. You’re wearin’ yourself out, and ya need to rest up, ‘cause in a few months, we’re gonna have another little one to take care of. Do ya really think havin’ Annie and her baby in the house is gonna make things any easier from any of us, includin’ yourself and our baby?” Michaela realized what her husband was saying. While her heart was telling her she needed to help this girl all the way, she was beginning to realize that she simply wasn’t going to have the time to care for a newborn of her own and help a new, very young mother care for her own newborn. “We do need to find a place for her. We need to find her a good home. The problem is that there aren’t many people who are willing to take in a young girl who’s having a child of her own. Furthermore, Annie has a lot of emotional baggage that many people won’t want to deal with.” Sully stared at his wife for a moment, suddenly realizing his wife’s point of view. “’Cept us,” he whispered. Michaela looked at him with surprise. “What?” “Since Annie got here, we’re the only ones who’ve been willin’ to help her out. None of the townsfolk even came to try to help out when they found out what happened.” “What are you saying?” Sully paused for a moment, and clasped Michaela’s hand in his own. “I’m sayin’ that if you’ll give yourself time to rest, and give Annie some room, this might work out.” “You mean, you wouldn’t mind having her and her baby stay here?” “I never minded. I just hated seein’ ya getting so tired and not havin’ time to spend with the family.” “I promise that will change, Sully,” Michaela said, leaning in to kiss him softly. “I promise.” *~* “Happy birthday, to you, happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Connor and Daniel, happy birthday to you!” Sully and Michaela helped their one-year-old sons blow out their first birthday candles as they all sat at a table at Grace’s. Their closest friends had come to help celebrate on this beautiful September day. Even Annie, now in her sixth month like Michaela, had come into town to spend this special day with the people she was slowly starting to consider her family. She had begun riding into town about a week ago once her waist began to expand. Dorothy and Olive had been kind enough to help fit her with dresses. Emily Donovan, who had moved away a while ago but was visiting, was glad to help out. She had known Annie’s parents, and was sad to know of what happened since their deaths. School had started up again, but Jenny had released class early so she and the Sully kids could go to the birthday party. Mary, Anthony, and Becky had tagged along as well. The townsfolk were slowly beginning to warm up to Annie, though a few seemed to be a bit wary about having a pregnant, un-wed fourteen year old running around. Jake and Loren were civil to her, though neither were sure that it was right for Michaela and Sully to let out in public in the condition she was in at her age and status. Michaela’s pregnancy was progressing very smoothly, which she was grateful for. Though her back hurt quite a bit at times, Sully would be there to work out the knots, aches, and pains. Since Annie was spending more time out of her room and with the Sully family, Michaela was feeling less and less obligated to check in on her all of the time. Annie enjoyed helping Colleen with chores around the house, and Michaela was sure it was helping to keep her mind off of everything. With Annie’s newfound trust in many people, including the townspeople, Sully wasn’t feeling neglected anymore. Michaela had been more than enthusiastic during their private moments, and it seemed as if everything was slowly returning to normal. Even Colleen was feeling a little less anger toward her parents when it came to their punishment for her attempt to sneak out to meet her friends one late night. Michaela had cut her work hours down from early morning until two in the afternoon. Sully would make sure she was resting with her feet up in the evenings, and she was grateful for the way he doted on her, though she was beginning to wonder if Sully thought she was helpless. The boys’ birthday gifts, including the identical rocking horses and winter coats sent by Ingrid and Matthew, had been loaded into the wagon before Grace brought out one big sheet cake and two little cakes just for the boys to blow their candles out on and dig their little hands (and probably feet) into. After the candles were blown out, the townsfolk all sat around the tables at Grace’s café, enjoying the food and cake, and sharing stories like at any other social event. Michaela and Sully had put the boys in their own special seats, because as soon as those cakes were scooted up to them, their little hands dug in. “Look Brian,” Colleen said with a laugh. “They’ve both got a sweet tooth,” Michaela said with a grin. “What am I going to do with you boys?” Connor gave her a big cake-filled grin. Those who had witnessed this laughed or ‘awwed.’ It was quite a wonderful experience to see a child enjoying his first birthday cake. It was always a messy experience! Colleen came around to help Michaela keep the boys clothes as clean as possible, though it wasn’t going to be a hundred perfect effective. “Just think, you’ll be doin’ this again come Christmas next year,” Loren pointed out, putting his hands on his hips. “One thing at a time Loren, please,” Sully said with faked exhaustion. Kid Cole came walking over to the party. He’d been held up doing paperwork at the jail, and he had something hidden behind his back. “Glad you could make it,” Michaela called over. “Hey, I had to get these two cowboys their birthday presents. Ain’t every year ya turn one, huh?” He reached over and pinned little sheriff’s stars onto their shirts. The people at the party looked at them and began to fuss over how adorable they looked. Even Loren seemed to be crowding around as the women went up to pinch their little cheeks. Michaela and Sully stood back, their arms around one another’s waists. “Everyone is so happy,” Michaela pointed out. “It’s a special day,” Sully replied, kissing the side of her head. Michaela felt the baby kick her hard. “Oh!” “What is it?” “I think our unborn child is a little jealous of all of the attention the boys are getting.” Sully laughed and put his hand on his wife’s belly. “Don’t worry, we ain’t gonna forget about ya.” Michaela smiled, and Sully leaned down to kiss her softly. As the party began to wind down, the boys grew restless, so Jenny and Michaela took them to the clinic for a change of clothes and a short nap. Dorothy, Olive, and Myra helped Grace clean up, and the party guests began to get on with their everyday activities. Sully, Colleen, Brian, and Annie walked over to the wagon, and as the Sully children hopped into the back to sit with the twins’ birthday presents, Annie started off toward the town’s cemetery. “What’s she doin’, pa?” Brian wondered. “I’m not sure. Stay here.” Sully started off after her, and by the time he arrived at the cemetery, Annie was sitting on the bench connected to the old maple tree. Tears were in her eyes, but she hadn’t dared to let one fall yet. “Annie?” “I never even got to go to their funeral.” “Your ma and pa?” “Yeah,” she whispered with a slight nod. “I don’t even know if they had one.” She noticed two headstones marked with the last name of Sully. “You know them?” Sully’s gaze followed hers. “That’s my first wife and daughter.” “Your daughter was only a baby,” Annie noted softly. “Yeah. She and her ma died the night of the birth.” Annie’s lower lip began to tremble as she realized her own fears about giving birth. Sully, too, noticed Annie’s reaction. “What if it happens to me?” “What happened to Abagail probably wouldn’t have happened if we had had a doctor like Dr. Mike around. You’re in good hands.” “But you never woulda married Dr. Mike if that was the case.” “That’s true,” Sully realized. “Maybe God took them to Heaven for a reason so you and Dr. Mike could get married.” “I don’t know, but I’m sure glad I met her.” “Do you miss them?” Annie wondered. “Yeah,” Sully admitted with a gentle nod. “It used to hurt a lot to think about ‘em, but it’s getting easier.” “How?” “Well, I’ve got a new family now. We all love each other very much, and that makes everything seem a little easier.” Annie seemed to understand this. Sully knew she needed time alone, so he stood and walked away. Annie knelt down between Hanna and Abagail’s graves. She picked some nearby flowers and placed them at both grave markers. May fifth. Hanna Sully had been born on May fifth, and God had brought her to Heaven. Annie only hoped that her own child wouldn’t suffer the same fate as Hanna Sully. She wanted her child to live and be strong and healthy. She didn’t want God bringing him or her to Heaven until it was time many years in the future. “Tell my ma and pa I love them,” she whispered softly. She brushed away the tears when they began to flow, and started off toward the wagon. *~* That night, the house was quiet, and everyone except for Sully was sleeping. He couldn’t sleep. He kept thinking about his talk with Annie at the cemetery that afternoon. She was right. If things had turned out differently with Abagail and the baby, he probably never would have met Michaela, and he definitely wouldn’t have married her. His entire life would have turned out differently. God, he couldn’t believe it had only been a few years since it all happened, and not that he was glad his wife and daughter died, but he was thankful that Michaela had become a part of his life. If he had the chance to do it all over again, he still would have married Abagail. She brought so much joy to his life, and though their life together was short lived, it still had changed Sully’s life forever. But, he felt like he was a better man now that he was with Michaela. He was more attentive and concerned now that he knew the risks that pregnancy could bring. He knew he was probably driving Michaela crazy by being so worried sometimes, but he couldn’t help it. He didn’t want to lose the love of his life, and that was exactly what Michaela was. Loving Abagail had been different for Sully. He never felt the way about her as he did for Michaela. Michaela lit up his world; made his heart skip a beat every time she entered the room. Every time he saw her, he couldn’t help but be happier, even if they were quarrelling. Abagail had been so different than Michaela, but Sully didn’t know how to explain it. She had been beautiful, sweet, and intelligent, despite being raised in a general store by a father who had been strict and possessive. Thank God Loren had changed just a bit since those days. Losing Abagail had made a major impact on all of those who had known and loved her, and it wasn’t until after she was gone that Sully and Loren had learned to get along. Sully couldn’t picture his life without Michaela. A life without her seemed to be as foreign to him as the French language. To him, it was impossible. Sully heard footsteps coming down the stairs, and he turned to see his wife. “You should be up in bed restin’.” “The baby woke me up,” she admitted, walking over to stand beside his chair. “It wants some of that left over birthday cake.” Sully laughed. “You sit down, and I’ll get it for ya.” Michaela smiled and sat down in the chair in front of the fire. She propped her sore feet up on the foot rest, and Sully brought over a glass of milk and a piece of cake. “Oh thank you,” she said with a hungry look in her eyes. Sully grinned and watched as she ate. He knelt down next to the footrest and took her bare feet in his hands. He loved caring for her, even though she liked to take care of herself. “How does that feel?” “Mmm, perfect,” she replied, taking a sip of milk from the glass. “You’re so good to me.” Sully chuckled. “Well, you deserve it.” Michaela finished the piece of cake, drank down the last of the milk, and sat it aside after wiping her mouth with a towel. “Can you believe the boys are one today?” she asked with wide eyes. “I know. This time a year ago, you were upstairs restin’, like you should be doin’ now, and our boys were sleepin’ in their cradles for the first time.” Michaela grinned and reached out to touch Sully’s cheek with her fingertips. “We’ll get to do that all again very soon,” she replied. “I’m lookin’ forward to it.” “I’m sure you are,” she laughed. “I’m the one who has to do all the work. You just get to do the fun part.” “Already did that,” Sully replied, raising an eyebrow. “I meant playing with the babies,” Michaela replied, pinching his cheek. “Oh yeah! Well, that’s fun too.” She rolled her eyes and shook her head. “I’m so happy we’re having this baby,” she said softly, tracing circles around the pattern of her gown on her belly. “Me too, but every day I’m with you makes me happier,” he whispered, moving over to kiss her. “You’re saying that now, but just wait until we have another screaming baby in the house.” “Nah. At least when they’re screamin’ for attention, we know they’re alright.” “That’s true,” Michaela said with a thoughtful nod. “I just can’t believe that in three more months, we’ll have use for one of those cradles upstairs.” “Yep, or maybe two.” “Oh will you stop with that?” she asked with a laugh. She held her hand out, and Sully helped her stand. “What?” “You’re really determined we’re going to have two babies aren’t you?” “I just got this feelin’.” “Yeah, I know. I know. ‘The feeling.’” Sully chuckled and kissed his wife again. “C’mon. Let’s get you up to bed. He took his wife’s hand, and they walked upstairs together, bantering cheerfully back and forth about the upcoming delivery and Sully’s certainty that they were going to have two babies in their arms by Christmas. |