Shattered Remembrance

Chapter Eight

"I have my best slicer monitoring the communications with every holopress on Coruscant, both the prominent ones and the rags," Talon Karrde relayed to Han as they stood outside Luke's room. "There's been no mention of Luke's amnesia."

"It's only been two days since he woke up," Han returned. "Security still catches reporters trying to sneak in. We can't let our guard down, even for a moment."

Mara Jade stood silently behind Talon, her eyes fixed on the closed door. When it swooshed open and a med-droid exited, she leaned around Talon and peered inside.

Han shook hands with Talon. "Thanks for your help, Karrde. Leia and I appreciate it."

Talon nodded, then gestured for Mara that it was time to leave. As Han started into Luke's room, he got the distinct impression that Mara would've followed him if not for Talon.

***

"How ya doin' today, Luke?" Han smiled, pulling up a chair. "They treatin' you okay in here?" He surveyed the remains of Luke's meal tray. "Gettin' real food now, I see, if you can call it that."

"It was all right," Luke replied, his gaze shifting from the now-closed door to his brother-in-law. He held up his right hand with a slow smile. "Got my new hand."

"So I see," Han said, leaning forward as if to admire the new appendage. He'd never told Luke this, but that prosthetic hand had always made Han feel guilty. Luke would never have lost his real one if he hadn't come to Bespin to rescue him and Leia. "Leia's planning on bringing the kids to see you this afternoon, if you're up to it. They've been begging to see their uncle."

"Yeah, I guess," Luke said, without much enthusiasm. "What did you say their names were again?"

Han cringed inside. He hoped Leia reminded them on what to expect. "Jaina's our daughter, and Jacen's her twin brother. They're ten. Anakin is the youngest; he's eight and a half."

"Okay, got it." Luke nodded. "Hmm, Han. That couple you were talking to in the hallway … Do I … did I know them?"

"Yeah, you were acquaintances. Friends, even, I guess you could say." It was disconcerting how Luke would talk in the past tense, and Han hated that he was starting to do the same. "Their names are Talon Karrde and Mara Jade."

"Are they married?"

Han gave a short snort of laughter. "No. Not to each other, or anyone else. They're not the marryin' kind." He noted Luke's furrowed brow. "And no, they're not 'involved,' either. Why? They look familiar?" he asked cautiously.

Luke shook his head. "No. It's just … the woman … She was staring at me when the door slid open. I got the feeling she was staring this way even before the door opened."

"Jade is one intense woman. You've been on her bad side more than once." At Luke's startled look, Han reached over and patted his arm. "Don't worry. You ought to be on her good side at the moment. You just came back from rescuing her when your accident happened." To hell with not giving him too much information, Han thought to himself. He needs to know. "At least we assume she needed rescuing. She's not talkin' much about what went on."

"So I was friends with her." Luke sunk lower into his pillow, looking even smaller and more frail to Han. "Why didn't she come inside to visit me then?"

"The doc doesn't want anyone but relatives for the time being." Han shrugged. "I'm sure she'll be around eventually."

Luke looked up questioningly. "You and Leia have been the only ones I've met so far, and now your children are coming. Doctor Panio told me I wasn't married, but still …"

"Uh, yeah …" Han gave a weak smile. "We're the only relatives you have. But you have lots of friends," he hurried to add. "They're just waitin' for the go-ahead to come see you."

"So I don't have anyone … special?"

Han shook his head. "Carefree bachelor. Not even a girlfriend." At Luke's dismayed look, he continued, "I mean, not at the moment, kid. You've had girlfriends in the past. A few, anyway."

"Tell me about them," Luke asked, leaning forward.

Blast, what am I getting myself into? Han thought. This was the most eager that Luke had acted since he'd awoken, and Han didn't have a single encouraging tale to tell him.

"Ah, kid, they've all been a few years back. None of them are around anymore, so it's just as well …"

"Just as well that I've forgotten them?" Luke bit out.

"No, Luke, it's just … I don't wanna dredge up old …"

"There are no painful memories to dredge up, Han."

Han sighed. Of all the things for him to be curious about. Telling him that his father was a Sith Lord wouldn't be any worse than this. Though Han had already decided that Leia was gonna take care of that particular revelation.

"Okay," he finally said. "The early ones, when you were younger, were really just crushes. Women that you were fond of. There was only one that I'd say you were really in love with."

"What happened to her?" Luke said slowly.

"It just didn't work out, kid." How could he explain this without going into the body-borrowing Force-blind details? "It wasn't your fault. She had issues of her own. We haven't seen or heard from her in, oh, six or seven years."

Luke fell quiet for awhile, and Han hoped he would have no more questions. But Luke did have one.

"What was her name?"

"Callista."

Han would never forget the agonized grief that Luke experienced when Callista left him. He wasn't sure the kid had ever really gotten over the tall beauty. Maybe in a few instances, amnesia could be a blessing. "Stars, Luke, you don't really have a lifestyle right now that lends itself to a long-term relationship. I'm sure you'll find somebody someday, though."

Luke narrowed his eyes at Han's feeble attempt to make him feel better. "I don't even know what I do for a living. What kind of a lifestyle do I have?"

Leia had lectured Han on not mentioning anything about the Force or Jedi Knights, at least not yet. So what was he supposed to say? Why wasn't she here yet to deal with all this? "You're sort of a peacekeeper, Luke. You go around upholding justice, doing good deeds, and you teach others to do the same."

"Including rescuing people, apparently," Luke murmured, and Han could see his internal struggle to put the pieces of his life together. "Here? In this city?"

"Hmm, no." Han swept one arm around. "Everywhere."

"The whole planet?"

"The whole galaxy, pal." Han leaned back in his chair. "You're on the go a lot."

Luke nodded. "Is it dangerous?"

Han tried to hide a frown. "There are risks." And you're the biggest risk taker imaginable.

"Is that how…" Luke raised his right hand.

This time Han couldn't hide his grimace. Leia would kill him for sure if he blurted out that episode. "Indirectly, yeah," he said, hoping that vague answer was enough to satisfy Luke.

"Are you one of these peacekeepers, too?" Luke asked, his gaze sweeping over Han's casual attire.

"Uh, no, not like you," Han replied. "Retired military. And Leia's in politics."

Suddenly, Luke sat up straighter, staring at his door. A moment later, Leia and the kids walked through. It was eerie, Han thought, how Luke was unconsciously using the Force. He remembered Luke telling him tales of his childhood, and how in hindsight he realized why his uncle berated him or dismissed his feelings whenever he 'knew' something was going to happen.

Even if Han couldn't embrace the Force himself, he was glad his children had the freedom to learn and practice their Force heritage. As he watched his brother-in-law smile apprehensively at his niece and nephews, Han realized the family's plans of having the kids study under their beloved uncle may have to be altered. He only hoped it wouldn't be permanent.

Jaina, Jacen and Anakin approached Luke in wide-eyed wonder.

"Hello," Luke said tentatively.

Before Leia could grab him, Anakin darted forward, climbing quickly onto Luke's bed.

"Uncle Luke! Do you remember me? I'm Anakin. I'm your favorite."

"Anakin!" Leia frantically tried to pull her youngest from the stranglehold he had on Luke.

"You are not his favorite," Jaina cried, tugging on her brother's leg. "Uncle Luke likes us all equal."

"Uh, Anakin?" Luke gently pried the youngster's knee aside. "Could you watch my leg?"

"See? See?" Anakin grinned in triumph, even as he moved to Luke's other side, out of his mother's reach. "He does remember me!"

"Nuh-uh. You just told him your name, stupid." Jaina ran to the far side of the bed. "I'll hold him for you, mom. Jacen, come help!"

"Are you just going to stand there, Han?" Leia snapped. "Do something!"

Han quickly wiped the grin off his face. "Kids! Behave." He pointed to a spot next to him. "Everybody stand over here, now!"

Luke let a relieved smile escape Han's direction as the children moved to obey. With a grateful sigh of her own, Leia endeavored to regain control.

"Children, your uncle Luke is going to need some help in remembering everything. So why don't you each tell him a few things about yourself? Jacen, you may go first."

"Why Jacen?" Jaina and Anakin shouted simultaneously.

The glare from Leia told them exactly why their brother got to go first.

With a smug grin, Jacen said, "I'm Jacen, Uncle Luke. I have lots of pets, but my mom and dad don't like me to let them out of their cages. I want to be a Jedi when I grow up, just like—" He stopped abruptly when Leia cleared her throat loudly.

"Jaina, you go next," Leia said quickly, pulling Jacen back by her side and giving her daughter a warning glare.

"Okay, well …" Jaina fidgeted uncharacteristically. "I'm Jacen's twin, 'cept I'm older, which makes me smarter." She ignored Jacen's groan of indignation. "And I wanna be a pilot when I get big, just like … just like my dad. Only I wanna fly an X-wing." She spared her father an apologetic glance.

Leia nodded, and Han could feel her relief. Luke was leaning forward, intently hanging on every word. He murmured a word of acknowledgement, then turned to await his last nephew's self-introduction.

"I already told you my name," Anakin pronounced, peering through his dark lashes with eyes that matched his uncle's. "I like to take things apart and put them back together, better than they were. Sometimes you would help me. And you wouldn't tell mom or dad when stuff blowed up that wasn't supposed to." He gave Luke a hopeful grin. "I can teach you how to build stuff again, if you don't remember."

"Thank you, Anakin," Luke said with a smile. "I'd appreciate that."

"Great!" Anakin said, his face lighting up. "Oh, and I want to be a Jedi when I grow up, too!"

Luke's puzzled gaze swept from the children to Han and Leia. "What's a Jedi?"

At Leia's stricken look, Han decided he'd better take the initiative. "It's one of those peacekeepers like I was tellin' you about."

"So, I'm a Jedi, then?"

"Uh, yeah, Luke," Han said, ignoring Leia's glare. "It's just the name for the kind of job you do. Guardian of peace and justice kind of thing."

The rest of the visit, under Leia's concerted direction, centered on Luke's medical prognosis. He related how he'd been able to walk around his room, with a med-droid's assistance, and would begin physical therapy for his leg the next day.

***

As the Solo children piled into the rear seat of the family speeder, Leia pulled Han out of earshot.

"What in blazes had you been telling Luke before we got there? I thought we agreed not to mention the Jedi yet."

"Hey, it was the kids who brought up the word Jedi, not me," Han retorted in a low voice. "Luke asked me what he did for a living. What was I supposed to tell him? You know how he was lied to when he was growing up. I'm sure as hell not going to start lying to him now."

"I know, but …" Leia speared him with the look of an interrogation specialist. "Just describe to me exactly what you did tell him, so I know where to go from here. How much does he know?"

Han sighed in exasperation. "He knows he was in some branch of law enforcement, and that he worked all over the galaxy. That's it. Nothing about spooky powers or glowing swords or layers of robes."

"All right," Leia said, her satisfaction apparent in the relaxing of her shoulders. "And you're right, we can't lie to him. As Doctor Panio said, Luke has to be able to trust us." Sorrow shone in her languid brown eyes as she gazed at Han. "I still can't believe this is happening."

"Hey, sweetheart, he could wake up tomorrow and suddenly remember everything." Han gently guided Leia toward the speeder, where the children were making known their impatience to get going.

Leia nodded, but her expression did nothing to reassure Han. He wondered if the Force was giving her any insight into Luke's future, but he couldn't bring himself to ask.