Part 7

Winter holidays came and went, and Justin found that even at home with his family trimming the Christmas tree that Josh was still on his mind. He had talked to him once or twice when he called Tyler, conversations that usually ended up with Justin gasping into the phone, one hand down his pants. Now, he had returned to Olmwood, back to Josh, and while everything seemed okay, Justin was troubled. His feelings for Josh seemed to be increasing instead of fading away, and Justin wasn't quite sure about how Josh felt about him. Sometimes he'd be really loving and protective of him, then at other times he could be a real prick, treating Justin like a random piece of ass. Justin didn't know what to make of these mixed signals.

He was contemplating this while he tried to concentrate on his geometry homework when Lance entered.

"Hey, man, am I interrupting anything?" Lance asked, sitting down on the bed beside Justin. Justin shook his head.

"No, I wasn't paying much attention to this anyway. I haven't seen you since we got back from break. Where you been hiding, Bass?" Justin asked smiling.

"I haven't been hiding at all. You probably haven't seen me because from what I've heard, you've been spending all your extra time with Josh." Lance replied, his finger tracing a hickey left on Justin's neck.

Justin blushed and ducked his head. "Yeah, well, I know you don't like Josh and everything…" Justin began, but was cut off by Lance.

"No, but you know, you do. And I respect that. And he seems to like you. I'm sure that you two have a completely different relationship than he and I did. I mean, I bet that he doesn't even follow those same outdated rules that he did with me."

That caught Justin's attention. "What rules?"

Lance shrugged. "Oh, like not kissing you on the mouth because, and I quote, 'this is a simple fuck not a relationship'. And never letting you top him. But, like I said, I'm sure you two have gotten past all those silly issues."

Lance's words sunk in with Justin. No, he never topped Josh but then again, he never asked. He knew that Josh liked control and to him, being on top solidified that. But Justin wondered if Josh trusted Justin enough to once relinquish that control to him. And the kissing thing was really getting to Justin. Yes, Josh kissed his forehead or his cheek, and sometimes even his nose, but never once had they ever mouth kissed, not once in almost five months. Justin was so deep in thought that he didn't notice that Lance was still talking.

"Are you listening to me Justin?" Lance asked, pushing him in his shoulder.

"Huh? Oh, I'm sorry, I kind of drifted off there. What were you saying?"

"I was asking if Josh was getting you anything for your birthday. It is in a few weeks right? January thirty-first?" Justin nodded. He hadn't even discussed his birthday with Josh. "So is he?" Lance pressed.

Justin shrugged. "But I shouldn't know. I mean, that's a surprise right?" Justin pulled his mouth into a bright smile, ignoring the dread pooling in his stomach. He then quickly changed the subject, but those doubts that Lance had brought up still weighed on his mind.

_ _ _

Josh was surprised when he opened his door to an apologetic Kevin. They hadn't talked since their fight, but here he was, at Josh's door. Josh blinked, surprised. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

Kevin sighed. "Man, I came to apologize. I was really out of line, and well…we've been friends since forever, and I'd hate to think that I messed that up with a few careless words. So, you forgive me?"

Josh pulled Kevin into his arms. "Of course I do, man. You're the best friend I've got."

Kevin pulled away from the embrace after a minute and sat at Josh's desk. "So, what's up with you and the kid? You falling for him or something?"

Josh rolled his eyes. "No, nothing like that. It's just that he's a cool person and I didn't appreciate you talking about him like that."

Kevin smirked. "Whatever. Please, Josh save the lies for someone who doesn't know you as well as I do. You're completely smitten. It's you and Andrew all over again."

Josh blanched at the mention of that name. "Don't mention him," he muttered through clenched teeth, but Kevin continued like he hadn't heard.

"So how long before the kid is telling you what to do, huh? Do you remember how you are when you're in love, Josh? All vulnerable and shit? Will we be seeing a return of the old Josh now that Timberlake's practically got you eating out of his hand?"

Josh's eyes narrowed as he turned back to Kevin. "You know it's not like that. Justin's not any more different than all the other people I've fucked. You know the deal. I'll be damned if I ever turn back into the weak bastard that I once was. I vowed five years ago that no one would ever have that type of power over me ever again, and I meant it."

"Man, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. I mean, for all it's worth, it does seem like the kid is wrapped around your finger. I was just talking." Kevin apologized, even though inwardly he was beaming. Just then a soft knock interrupted them and the door opened to a shy Justin.

"I wasn't sure if you'd be here, but…" Justin blushed, and Kevin saw Josh's face soften for a moment, and then as if remembering the discussion, hardened again.

"I was just on my way out. Have fun you two." Kevin announced as he walked out of the room, leaving the two alone. Josh pulled Justin to him, pushing him back on the bed as he started to remove his clothes.

"Well, hello to you too. Are you ok?" Justin asked, amused.

Josh sighed. "It's just that Kevin brought up some memories I don't want to remember. But I'm ok, now that you're here." he answered, continuing to strip Justin naked.

Justin stopped Josh's busy fingers and forced him to look at Justin. "Do you want to talk about it?" Justin asked, concerned.

Josh opened his mouth like he was going to tell Justin everything, but he shook his head and unbuttoned Justin's pants. "No, I don't. Right now I'm preoccupied with fucking the beautiful boy in front of me," he replied, licking across Justin's collarbone.

Justin tried to bring Josh's lips to his, but Josh deftly evaded them, instead capturing Justin's earlobe with his teeth. Justin rolled them over so that he was on top, and began, sucking Josh's nipples. Josh sighed and arched, but when Justin's fingers flirted at his entrance, he almost pushed Justin off the bed. "What the hell was that?" he asked.

"That was me trying to make love to you." Justin retorted. He hated how whiny and close to tears he sounded. Josh noticed and cupped his face, kissing him on the cheek.

"Oh, baby, I just don't do that." Josh explained. When Justin looked at him in confusion, he continued. "It's nothing against you, it's just that I don't bottom for anyone. Something happened a long time ago, and…well, I just don't do that."

Justin sniffled. "Don't you trust me?" he asked, damning the squeakiness of his voice.

Josh gave him another kiss on the cheek. "Well, I could ask you the same thing. Don't you like the way I make you feel? Don't you trust me to continue making you feel that way?" Justin nodded, and Josh laid him back down, going back to his ear.

Justin decided to try another tactic. "You know my birthday's in a couple of weeks," he announced.

Josh looked up from where he was sucking on Justin's neck in surprise. "Really when?" he asked, propping himself up on his elbows.

"The thirty-first." Justin answered happily, glad to see Josh's interest in the conversation.

"Really? My baby boy's gonna be fifteen. I'm gonna have to get you something good then." Josh said, sliding down Justin's body, licking down his stomach before engulfing his erection. But as Justin came, he still couldn't vanquish that feeling of dread within him.

8 >>>
Index