Half Asleep
Category: Slash
Need to Know: Need to Know: Up to “Everything Put Together Falls Apart” - the episode ending with the weird Pacey and Emma kiss.
Feedback: Send it to milburncreek@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: I don’t own the characters nor would I ever want to. I’m trying to make some sense of Season 6
* * * * *
Pacey trudged home after another grueling day at work, surprised by the spectacle in what was normally the living room. Emma had what appeared to be everyone from a Hell’s Kitchen performance stuffed in the apartment. There were your average freakish-looking people strewn throughout.
He squinted through his tired eyes, struggling to find a recognizable face. When none seemed recognizable, he pushed through the crowd to get to his bedroom.
If being foolish enough to want to come home was his first mistake, then the second was opening that door. There sprawled out on his bed were two individuals determined to strip each other in under ten seconds.
He was about to order them to leave but instead went to his dresser and threw a bunch of condoms at the bed and slogged out of the room. This time, he was spotted by his previously unavailable roommate.
“Why, hello, mate,” Emma offered as she tried not to crash into the two guys carrying a bucket of ice through the swarm. “Would you watch it?!” she yelled out to them as they banged into the couch.
“What’s going on?”
Emma tilted her head as she answered sarcastically, “A tea party. What does it look like?”
“I didn’t think of you as the type to host reckless parties in your own place.” Pacey shook his head, amazed those words came out of his mouth. “When did I turn into an uptight adult and why haven’t I noticed it sooner?”
“You’re wearing a suit and tie yet you’re just now seeing that?”
“There were still elements of the former Pacey Witter present.” He was bumped from behind by a girl trying to balance three cans of beer. “I didn’t see you as the party-throwing type.”
Emma explained, “I thought it was an appropriate time considering many of the people in the flat will be studying for finals after this.”
“Oh yeah, the life of the college student. Thank heaven I don’t have to deal with that. Unfortunately, I’m too drained to enjoy any of this. Do you mind if I crash on your bed? There’s too much happening on mine.”
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you. Your ex passed out there.”
Pacey recalled some recent problems with Audrey. He muttered wryly, “At least we know she won’t wreck the apartment tonight.”
Emma didn’t catch on to the sarcasm, answering seriously, “Very true. You could take Jack’s room.”
“He’s not here?”
“Nope. He went out with David. Right, that’s his name? The counselor guy.”
“Damned if I know. You’re cleaning up my room in the morning.”
Emma nodded, “Fine, no problem,” then was swallowed back into the crowd.
Pacey walked into Jack’s room, expecting a similar scene to what was in his room. Instead, he was relieved to see not an item out of place.
He muttered, thinking back to the pigsty that was his room, “They figured it’d be best to hit the place where nobody would notice the mess.”
Pacey undid the tie, slipped out of his shoes and jacket, and sat down at the foot of the bed. The noises outside the room muddled together into one persistent tune.
He looked around the unfamiliar bedroom. Though he was tired, he was equally anxious to check up on the activities of ole buddy Jack. Pacey hoped there would be something incriminating lying on the desk; he didn’t want to outright invade Jack’s privacy but a quick peek wouldn’t do any harm.
Discouraged to see nothing except photos and scattered notes from homework assignments, Pacey settled back on the bed. It didn’t make sense how he ended up with his life the way it was. A job that drove him by waving money in his face. An ex who would rather drink herself into oblivion than spend another minute around him. A roommate he made the foolish mistake of kissing solely because he wasn’t playing the role the successful businessman role for a few minutes.
At least Emma wasn’t holding that moment of weakness against him - that was a relief. To his knowledge, nobody else knew about it. Then again, his recent circle consisted of whoever hung around the apartment and work.
Pacey let out a deep sigh as he laid back on the bed, disgusted that he’d rather stay in this relatively quiet room than enjoy himself at the party outside. He wasn’t sure why, but here he felt like he’d stepped into a different world.
* * * * *
Jack returned to the apartment, surprised the party was still going on. A drunk girl crashed into him, confirming it wasn’t just a visual and aural experience. He shouted out, “Emma? Pacey?” but his voice was drowned out by the rest of the noise.
Eventually, he saw Emma dancing with someone he could bet she’d never met before tonight. When she was turned around, she exclaimed, “Jack!” and staggered over. “Just the most perfect guy. Well, almost perfect.”
Jack nodded, humoring her. “When you said a party, I didn’t picture this.” He wanted it to sound menacing but, truth was, as long as none of the neighbors complained, he was okay with it. After all, he’d had enough of these parties, courtesy of his stint in a fraternity last year.
“Oh come on, love. Enjoy what’s here. I figure I’ve kissed three guys tonight alone. I think you would’ve been interested in the third, such a cutie. They don’t kiss as well as Pacey but then again, I think he’s got secret powers.”
“When did you kiss Pacey?”
“Let’s see, we did once after that business party he prostituted me for and then… I guess that’s all. It only felt like more.”
“I’ll take your word for it.”
Emma giggled. “You mean you haven’t experienced that first-hand? You didn’t play Spin the Bottle? Hell, I’ve kissed a few females back home through drinking games.”
“Not…” Jack fumbled out a reply. “I think it’s better that situation has never happened.”
“Pity. You don’t know what you’re missing.” A guy walked by with two bottles of beer. Emma snagged one of them and offered it to Jack. “Here you go, love. Time to enjoy the gifts from the party gods.”
“I’d rather go to sleep.” Jack was about to let Emma return to the party when he confirmed, “You did make sure nobody ended up in my room, as I asked, right?”
Emma whined, “Jaaaack! I made sure of it. The passed-out are in my room and the orgies are in Pacey’s.” Jack nodded before heading to his room. He was almost at the door when Emma remembered, shouting, “Pacey! Fuck, except for Pacey!” But her voice didn’t carry far enough for Jack to heed the warning. She mumbled, “Damn! I wanted to sleep with Witter tonight.”
* * * * *
Jack entered his room, relieved to find pitch darkness and no movement. He clicked on the lamp on his dresser; it provided faint enough a glow to walk around the room without bumping into everything. No need to have the light draw attention here, he figured.
He slipped off his long-sleeve shirt, jeans and boots, left in just a wife beater and boxers, as he slunk down at the dresser, staring down at the assorted papers spread out on the desk. He thought back to the night so far. Jack and David had hung around Hell’s Kitchen, talking to Joey while she and Eddie were trying hard not to flirt with each other. They would be able to talk about almost anything. Except for one particular conversation, which never seemed appropriate. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy the time spent with David; he just didn’t see much more than friendship coming out of that. Before he saw David, Jack saw this night as a deadline in terms of which direction their current friendship was heading.
Jack shook his head, disappointed this as the way the evening ended: him alone in his room while other people were having fun and otherwise forgetting any problems they had before. He was about to crawl into bed and try to forget when he spotted a figure in the bed.
Jack groaned, “You can’t stay here.” He tugged at the blanket, which caused Pacey to turn in his sleep. He stopped pulling, bearing in mind Emma’s last words. Just as Jack had no place else to stay in this apartment, neither did Pacey.
He looked down at the floor then the bed, determining which option was more feasible. The floor was hard and, it being December, rather cold. On the other hand, Jack’s bed would barely fit two people, especially since space between them was required. It wasn’t just anyone in the bed; it was someone Jack didn’t feel entirely safe sharing a bed with. He could admit there were certain nights since they’ve lived in this apartment the results of this would have been undesirable and embarrassing.
Despite all the rather logical reasons to choose the floor, the bed won out, if primarily for being a warmer place to sleep. Jack yanked on the blanket so that Pacey would turn enough to give him space on the bed. He then shut off the desk lamp and gingerly situated himself in the bed. Jack tried to settle on a position, eventually lying on his back staring at the ceiling.
He found himself acutely aware of every little change in the room. Every breath of Pacey’s, every in and out, would torture him more than the last. The blinking of the clock constantly informing of how much time he’d still been awake. Somehow, the rather loud beats outside the room didn’t seem to penetrate here, as if there were soundproof walls.
Jack tried to relax but his thoughts would soon revert to the guy lying next to him. Throughout the years, he’d catch himself checking out Pacey on occasion. As long as Pacey never noticed, it was safe. He tried not to glance over at him, determined to at least attempt to fall asleep.
Eventually, curiosity got the better of him, as Jack sat up, letting his weight rest on his elbow as he turned. He took in the sight of Pacey’s tousled hair, the annoying goatee, the slightly opened mouth, and then quickly rolled back into his previous position before letting his mind wander any further. To such thoughts as how it would feel to have Pacey’s body on top of his, having his mouth invade, to…
“Damn it,” Jack muttered, feeling his body warm up immediately with those images, especially a stirring from his cock. Thankfully, Pacey noticed nothing but it made it no easier for Jack to fall asleep.
Think safe thoughts, Jack scolded internally. Grams’ kitchen on Thanksgiving. Okay, that’s actually rather pleasant imagery. Think safe, boring thoughts. Dawson and Joey’s relationship. Dawson and Joey talking about their relationship.
Jack had just dozed off when he felt Pacey change position. He willed himself to keep his eyes closed and push back toward the slumber abyss. That was, until he found Pacey’s arm trapping him in place. Jack immediately opened his eyes to discover Pacey was now on his side, his face toward him, and one arm draped over his body.
Damn, Pacey must be thinking he’s in bed with Audrey. Jack was frozen in place, not sure about confronting this rather awkward position.
A deep murmur escaped from Pacey’s lips, “You find me so irresistible.” Jack twisted his neck, not surprised at all to determine that Pacey wasn’t awake. He snickered, realizing this could be a funny story to tell the gang, and turned back to looking at the ceiling.
Pacey continued, “You’re playing games with me. I could understand; you want me to wait. I can be quiet longer than you can.”
Jack bit his lip to keep a louder laugh from escape. Nonetheless, a little squeak escaped in response, to which Pacey replied, “You don’t believe me? I’ll prove it.” With that, he flattened his hand against the mattress and positioned his body on top of Jack’s, situating his knee between Jack’s legs. Pacey’s eyes were narrowed as he bent down to kiss him, allowing his tongue slip through Jack’s agape mouth. Jack initially obliged, then remembered this wasn’t a dream for Jack but it was somehow connected to a dream for Pacey.
“Pacey?” Jack said as he tried to push Pacey off of him. “Wake up!”
Pacey’s eyes opened slightly then were wide-open upon surveying the situation. He shot up into a sitting position. “Oh my God…when…how…how did we end up in the same bed? I don’t remember drinking anything except water…”
Jack laid back, his hands folded together behind his head, laughing, “What, you can’t remember the hours of mind-blowing sex? Those tablets in the water really worked.”
Pacey arched an eyebrow, realizing nothing could have happened. “Then why…”
“Emma told you my room was available…”
“I recall.”
“But she didn’t tell me my room wasn’t vacant. So we got stuck together. Although, somehow, the word ‘stuck’ doesn’t seem to fit.”
“Speak for yourself,” Pacey muttered. “I’ll never live this one down.”
“At least I can compare notes with the girls in the group.” Jack chuckled. “Is that how you kissed Emma?”
“How do you know about that?”
“The drunk’s got loose lips. For the record, she thinks you’re the best kisser ever.”
“That’s not exactly news for me. Though I am surprised I have such abilities when not fully conscious,” giving a mischievous grin.
Jack sat up, not wanting to give Pacey any of the satisfaction. “What makes you so sure of that?”
“Because I am what I am. Even you can’t deny that.”
Jack rolled his eyes. “Yeah, okay, if using the philosophy of Popeye is what gets you through life.”
“Pop-” Pacey stopped, then smiled triumphantly, confusing Jack. “Just when I began to think I lost my touch, my inner Saturday morning cartoon comes out. I was beginning to wonder if he was gone.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll always be that immature brat.”
Pacey nodded, “That’s what makes me so lovable. Damn, I really wish I was drunk.”
“Sorry, man, you’ll be forced to remember hovering over me.”
Pacey pointed out, “I don’t actually know how much of the kiss was in the dream and how much was real.”
“Depends on who you were dreaming about.”
“A five-foot-ten model with long, flowing brown hair. She was teasing me incessantly…”
Jack cut in to inquire, “An idealized version of Joey?”
“Not…you’d assume I wouldn’t think in that direction anymore. But sometimes, I suppose, I slip.” He shook his head. “We’re not talking about Joey right now because that will only exhibit how incestuous our group is. It’s wrong to do a kiss-and-tell about other people immediately after a kiss. Even if I wasn’t cognizant at the time.”
“You want that memory?” Jack smirked, his green eyes dancing about as he got an idea. Pacey wasn’t sure he’d like whatever this suggestion was. Jack nestled his hand along the back of Pacey’s neck and bridged the gap between them with a searing kiss. Pacey was initially taken aback by the gesture, then found himself oddly enjoying the feel of Jack’s mouth on his. He opened his mouth enough to allow Jack’s tongue to sneak in.
Jack suddenly broke away from the kiss, surprised he’d actually had the nerve to carry it out. “That’s where we were before you woke up.”
Pacey’s voice was caught in his throat. Finally, he squeaked out, “I see.”
Jack smirked, “Unbelievable! Pacey Witter is speechless!” Pacey looked away from him, focusing on the door. He hadn’t really wanted to tell anyone about his recent thoughts about Joey. Pacey wasn’t sure which was a bigger problem: kissing Jack when he thought it was Joey or kissing Jack for real and enjoying it.
After a minute of silence, Pacey growled, “I fucking hate all of this. Wouldn’t it be nice to just escape from everything you know is true?” He turned back to Jack, his eyes dark and tormented. “Tomorrow, you’ll go back to counselor guy and I’ll be back to pining after Joey.”
“That’ll probably be true.”
“Reality, for lack of a better word, bites.”
Jack offered, “We could always try to forget about that for one night.”
Pacey smiled at that theory, replying in a husky voice, “Would that work for you?” He slid closer to Jack, letting one hand glide over Jack’s toned chest.
“I…don’t see why not.” Both bridged the gap between them, meeting in a burning kiss.
Chapter 2 - The Day After
Back to Index