| Ooh! An interview! I love talking to people! What do you want to know? ::plops down on a treestump and shoves his hoopak into the ground:: Oh, that? That's a hoopak! It's a Kender's best weapon. No Kender should ever go wandering without it! See, up here? ::points to the top of the hoopak:: See how it's like a slingshot? That's a handy weapon . . . See, let me show you how it works. You place a rock, or some other light but kinda heavy object here, in the leather sling, like so. Then, you stab the other end into the ground. Well, actually, you're supposed to stab it into the ground first, like I have, or else your ammunition will fall out of the sling and that wouldn't be good for anyone. Oh look! What's that? That's a pretty bird! Wow, such pretty colors . . . ::starts to wander off:: Huh? Oh, yeah, right! The hoopak! Anyway, you do what I've done here, then place your ammunition in the leather sling . . . then . .. pull . . . it . . . back . . . and . . . let it go! See! OH! Oh, dear! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hit you in the eye!! But, but why did you have to be sitting where you knew the trajectory would be? That's a rather silly place to sit, right in the middle of the path of a rock! I mean, you could get hurt! Like now! Still . . . I hope your eye feels better. Hmm? Oh, yeah, my history . . . well . . . Hmm. Where to begin. I was born! That's a good place to start! Of course, being born is always a good place to start. I mean, if you're never born, how do you ever do anything? Don't you think that would get boring? To never be born? What? Oh, yes, of course! Sorry. How long have I been in Arytiris Benerel? About 3 months. No, 6 . .wait . . . maybe it's been less. Or more. Or less. I know I've been here a while! I've met lots of nice people! I've met faeries and Drows and dragons! ::leans over and whispers:: Did you know the King of Vanyanin Aran'dor is a dragon? Isn't that wonderful? A dragon king! I believe dragons should be treated as equal as anyone. Unless they're evil dragons. Then maybe a good talking to would help. I know this one time, my friend Gateknocker came across a mother dragon sleeping in her cave, and she was mean, and-- huh? Oh, right! Well, Kender should always carry a set of lockpics, too! To pick locks, of course! I mean, no one really means to lock a door. Usually, I believe it's just forgetfulness. Everybody loves company and to make new friends! I'll bet if people knew how many other people would make friends with them if they didn't lock their doors, they wouldn't lock their doors! Honestly! There shouldn't even be doors! If there were no doors, people would just drop in all the time, and all sorts of new friends would be made!! I know if I see an open door, I walk right in, because you're supposed to walk into an open door, or else it wouldn't be open. I mean, if the door is open, they're obviously expecting somebody, right? Well, what if they're expecting me? I wouldn't know unless I walked in! You know, my Uncle Trapspringer . . . ::and for another 4 hours, he rambles on:: |
