"I
        laughed until I stopped. Plus a great song at the
        end." - Jesus
        "The
        best thing since the invention of the wheel." - St
        Catherine
        "Vini."
        - Onan
        "Big
        nose! Nose City! Now that's funny." - Adolph
        'Chopper' Hitler
        "There
        was something vaguely familiar about this film..." -
        Matthew, Mark, Luke and
        John
        "Was
        that meant to be me?" - Mary
        "Wolf
        nipple chips, ocelots' earlobes. Takes you right back
        doesn't it." - Nero
        "A
        gwate, wibbald, wiotous, woller-coaster of a fiwm."
        - Pilate
        "On
        the whole it was funny - but we didn't like the
        nudity." - Adam and Eve
        "I
        thought we were going to see Titanic." - Noah
        "That
        Brian - If he'd been my son, I would have killed
        him." - Abraham
        "I
        think we can draw a veil over this one." - Salome
        "WOW!
        It really opened my eyes!" - Saul
        "Great
        film, but the ticket price was way too high. I mean,
        THIRTY PIECES OF SILVER FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!" - Judas
        "Needed
        more sacrifices." - Moses
        "Bah!
        Needed more talking donkeys." - The talking donkey
        "Smashing
        film! It gave me a warm glow throughout." - Joan of
        Arc
        "A
        touching movie. It gets you... right here." - St
        Sebastian
        "I
        didn't enjoy it. In fact, I'm going to deny that I ever
        saw it." - Peter
        "I
        would have followed the gourd. Ha ha." - Jonah
        "Far
        too long. It would have tried the patience of...
        me!" - Job
        "Splendid
        audio." - Joshua
        "I'd
        kill to be able to make a movie like that." - Cain