Holy Batshit Fatman...

    Posted by Maroon [-SCW-] on 12/10/2001, 10:24 pm
    User logged in as: stranger
    66.69.80.230

    [-the scene opens at Club Maroon'd.. We havent been here in a while. Well we have actually. Just havent had any reason to cut any promos. But anyways. Maroon and Stevens are there at Club Maroon'd, its not very busy just yet' cause its almost 4 in the afternoon.. Just wait till 8:30 or so. But all the members of the MPA. which is a subdivision of SCW now, are doing there own things. But Maroon and Stevens are sitting at a booth. Maroon is drinking his beers. Stevens. since he's not 21 just yet. Is drinking his milk-]

    [-Maroon-] No.. you will drink your milk..

    [-Prodigy-] Well you're not drinking your milk..

    [-Maroon-] Hello?!?! I already drank my milk before you got here.. So I am entitled to drink my beer now.. Is that all right??

    [-Just then Tomagotchi. The fat sumo wrestler of the MPA comes running in...-]

    [-Tomagotchi-] Watashi wa Jeson Miraa desu. Hajimemashite. Doozo yoroshiku!!!!!!!!!!

    [-Maroon-] What the hell did he just say?!?!

    [-Prodigy-] Hello?!?! He said that we need to put it on MSNBC right away!!

    [-Maroon-] You know Japanese?

    [-Prodigy-] Hello?!?! Duh!!!

    [-The TV is switched to MSNBC and the newslady is on-]

    [-CNN Newsanchor-] ... And the monkey was all better!.... In other news.. Deadly virus is let loose in Canada.. Centered out of major canadian city of Toronto... We have CNN Senior Correspondant Hugh Jass on the scene... Hugh..

    [-Hugh Jass-] Thank you CNN Newsanchor... In top news.. Here in Toronto.. It appears that the virus known as Idiothrax has hit and it has hit hard. Most of the residence of Toronto have been either diagnosed with Idiothrax or are being treated for Idiothrax.. It is not known where the strain of Idiothrax started. But a poll on MSNBC.com had 97% of the people say that the virus has been here since the French owned the land... CNN Newsanchor...

    [-CNN Newsanchor-] Thank you Hugh.. Let's just hope that Idiothrax doesnt make it to the states. We have Professor Keenbean here to explain some of the symptoms of Idiothrax... Thank you for joining us today Dr Keenbean...

    [-Keenbean-] Thank you CNN Newsanchor.. Idiothrax's victims suffer from what is called.. Delusions of grandure, an affiliation with midgets, believeing that they are great and wanting to be touched all the time.. But keep in mind these are only a few symptons.. Other symptoms include thinking that Lance Storm is a good wrestler..

    [-CNN Newsanchor-] Thats insane.. What can we as a people do if we were to encounter someone with Idiothrax??

    [-Keenbean-] Well, CNN Newsanchor.. My partners suggest that you keep an arms reach away from them. But slap them in the back of the head. Theres really no cure for Idiothrax.. But it can be treated..

    [-CLICK!!!!-]

    [-Maroon-] Thats it!!!!

    [-Prodigy-] Whats it???

    [-Maroon-] Hello?!?!? Thats what Shawn Hall has... He has Idiothrax.. How else can you explain the way he's been acting lately... Always thinking that he is great.. When for the past two weeks we've just been beating his ass night in and night out.... Those midgets.. And tell me that Lance Storm thing isnt a coincidence?? Hello?!? Its not...

    He goes and challanges me to a Hell In A Cell for the PPV?!? Hello?!? Im not even an employee of CCW. They do not pay me to wrestle.. Im not even on the roster.. What the hell is Hall thinking?? Its idiothrax..

    And what is the deal about challanging me already!??! Hello.. We're supposed to fued first.. Me kicking his ass a few times isnt a fued.. Its called pathetic..

    [-Prodigy-] That reminds me of when he challanged Loner right away in the EWA..

    [-Maroon-] Hello??!?! Shawn Hall has got a boner for Loner and cage matches.. I told this to him not to long ago.. I said... 'Shawn.. You need to chill on the hell in the cell and triple cage matches.. You're not The Undertaker.. Calm down.. There are regular matches out there.. Be creative..'

    And the deal is Edward... to avoid the match at the PPV if at all needed. Hello?! He makes a challange three minutes after the PPV I think Ric Flair is in the CCW.. What if something happened to him like on Monday maybe.. Say he got his match with Forks and I came down and accidently put a chair on his leg and jumped on it and seriously injured his ankle.. Now there's Hall with a busted up ankle.. That will prolly take about 4 weeks at least to heel some what... But in the meantime he has to face me in a Hell In A Cell..

    Would that be fair to me??! Would that be fair that Shawn Gimp'n Hall is walking about with a pair of crutches in the Cell and all I can do is kick his ass?!?! Without him fighting back??!

    Hello?!?! Im a fair man, Ed.. arent I??

    [-Prodigy-] Yes you are, Bro..

    [-Maroon-] And I got SCW back on TV didnt I??

    [-Prodigy-] Again.. yes you did..

    [-Maroon-] Hello?!? So obviously Im doing something right.. Thinking things out.. Unlike Idiothrax patient Hall who jumps the gun and ends up at the biggest PPV of his life with a busted ankle..

    Im sorry.. But Shawn Hall is my friend.. And since he suffers from Idiothrax.. Im not going to put him in that position....

    [-Prodigy-] You said.. 'Boner for Loner'

    [-roll credits-]