Camp Maroon'd

    Posted by Maroon well sorta on August 16, 2001, 7:56 pm
    24.160.151.139

    [Schools almost back. And that means that Maroon's Summer Camp for Gifted Youngsters is in its last days of activities]

    Cameron: All right kids.. This is our last day together and I know that you've been waiting all summer for this.. Mr. Maroon is finally going to show up and visit with you all..

    Kids: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

    Cameron: Thats right.. What youve all been waiting for all summer. But before Maroon gets here.. Does anyone have any stories that they'd like to share from this summer...

    Robby: Yeah... There was this one time.. at Maroon Camp... My parents they brought me some snacks. And this boy named Mark well he took the snacks and he went outside and he dropped one of the snacks and a mountian lion came and he ate the snack and then the girls screamed and then a guy shot the mountian lion in the head and then his brains went KABOOOOOOOM and it was cool...

    Cameron: Yes we were all there, Robby...

    Robby: And then there was this one time at Maroon Camp. Some kid drowned in the lake while all the counselors were having sex and then the kids mom came and killed all the counselors except this one girl and she cut off the moms head but then the boy came out of the water and took the girl but it was only a dream and then the boy was all grown up and he came back and killed the girl who killed his mom and he wore a sack on his head with a hole so he could see and he killed Kevin Bacon and then this other girl had taken the mothers sweater and put it on and pretended that she was his mom and she killed him. But he came back to life and killed these people who were on a farm and this guys eyes got squeezed out of his head and he started wearing a hockey mask and he got hung and died. And then he came back and tried to kill this little boy who was a Goonie but he couldnt and something happened and then later he started killing again at this mental house but it turns out it was only this whacked out dad who was mad because he kid got killed and then the same kid who was a goonie was all grown up he got that guy from welcome back kotter and they tried to see if he was really dead but they stabbed him with an iron rod and lightinging hit it and he came back to life and then he started killing people again and then his sister or cousin i dont remember came into the picture and he killed some more people and then he got electricuted and the sister or cousins dad came out of the water and dragged him down but somehow he survived and he came on this boat that was in the lake and somehow the lake was connected to the hudson river and he ended up in new york city and he killed a bunch of people and then fell into the sewer where acid is washed through there every night at midnight and he got all decomposed and he was just a little boy again. And then his spirit came and started killing people again in a hospital and after he was done this guy Freddy came and took him to hell.... But I heard that he's all frozen like Nuke right now at the bottom of the lake....

    [.......................................................]

    Cameron: Ok.. Robby just took up everyone story time... But guess what time it is kids..

    Kids: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!

    Cameron: Thats right.. Arts and crafts time...

    Kids: Damn!!!!

    [The kids make some arts and crafts when they all gather again outside on logs]

    Cameron: Now wasnt that fun, kids?? Yes it was.. Now its time for that special person... You've all been waiting for him... Here he is..... Mr. Marooooooooooooooon..

    Kids: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

    Maroon: Hey Hey Scabs... Whats the good word?? How you doing maing??? Hot Dammit... Get The Fu(k Outta me...

    [Maroon leaves]

    Rachel: That was the biggest load of horse shit Ive seen my entire life.. We spend all summer waiting to see Maroon and he leaves just as quickly as he came??

    Cameron: You see Rachel. Maroon has important things that he needs to do. Like beating the pot head slacker JC Larriett.. And something that much more important, that of winning the SCW World Title Tumble..

    So, on behalf of Maroon. I would like to apologize. And give you all free passes to his friend's Shawn Hall's Tundra Camp. Frozen ground all year long..

    Your busses and parents are here.. Please leave now. We enjoyed you this summer at Camp Maroon'd.. And have a good school year and hope to see you next year...

    Buh Bye...