Posted by Maroon on 7/27/2001, 8:40 am
24.160.151.139
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[the calm wind blow real hard through the halls of darkness, night, not the pissknocker that wrestles here the actual thing after daytime. Well anyways. Night turns to day and day turns to night. Spring turns to Summer and Summer turns to Winter, then winter gives spring and summer a miss and go straight into fall. Church bells ring a deathly toll. The figure dressed in black advances to the camera as fire from hell erupts from the cracked dry plain. In the distance a baby cries, which is completely unrelated to what is about to happen. Spencers and Hot Topic at the Mall have sales going on this weekend.] Maroon: You ready Shawn? Shawn Hall: Ready for what? And why did we come to the city morgue?? Maroon: We’re here to work on our Goth skills.. There are a whole bunch of dead people here. And we need to take there souls to hell.. Shawn Hall: Ok then.. Where do we start… Maroon: Well, first we need to document this. Shawn can you flip that switch please? Hall: This one?? Maroon: Yep yep… [Hall flips a switch as a buzz starts to emmit from near the door as smoke starts to build up and it gets real smokey. A deer is killed in some forest and its babies are eaten by some wolves] Hall: Cool smoke effect.. Real Gothic of you… but what is supposed to happen.. Maroon: … just watch… [the smoke starts stacking up as a doorknob is heard turning and a creak from a door opens, then it is heard closing] Someone: COUGH COUGH COUGH!! Maroon: Ok flip it again Shawn… [the switch is flipped, the smoke starts to dissapate. Hugh Morris kicks out. Iraq is bombed and some cat is set on fire in some pale skinned, black dyed hair black clothes wearing garage in a small town in Iowa] Maroon: Hey hey cameraqueer!! Hall: Hey Cameraqueer.. How the hell are ya?? Camerqueer: Not bad.. Maroon called me up said he needed something fimled, so Im here.. Maroon: Ok lets get started… But first we need some of this.. [maroon reaches into his pockets and pulls out a prescription bottle, death sucks, opens it up. Just south of Canada is the United States and hands a couple pills to Hall] Hall: And this is??? Maroon: Its Lithium… All the Goth Boys take it.. It makes you all mellow and takes away thoughts of suicide, but it also reaches down deep and brings out your sacrificial urges and makes you travel to third world countries to try to get Lepersy. Hall: Sweet… [Hall takes the Lithium and they begin to open the morgue drawers. Death Sucks Ass. And Maroon and Hall open up some bags and pull out Hallocaust Cloaks worn by Andre The Giant in The Princess Bride. Someone smokes a joint somewhere] Maroon: [chanting] As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. Hall: We kill goats and we don’t like light.. Maroon: Ok now with the gothic chanting out of the way.. We must take all of these peoples souls to Hell, where they will stay.. Hall: Sweet.. [Cameraqueer hits the switch and Death sucks dog ass, smoke starts to form up again, a doorknob is heard, a door is heard opening and closing. The switch is flipped again as a dog barks and then eats his own poop as Shawn Hall’s midgets ‘appear’. They are all wearing Jawa cloakes and walk to the drawers and starts loading the corpses on a dolly. They get tired of flipping on the smoke machine, so they just enter and leave through the door and carry the bodies outside and into a truck. Death eats his own poop also] Maroon: All righty then.. We’re officially Gothic Boys now.. We can start getting some respect in the CWF.. Hall: No doubt.. So where are the midgets taking the bodies? Maroon: To hell… Hall: Hell.. hell?? Like in Bill and Teds Bogus Journey, Hell?? Maroon: Well, The truck wont quite make it to that Hell.. so its going to the next closest thing to Hell… Hall: Wheres that?? Maroon: Mexico… [the weeping willow weeps. A tree falls in a forest, because someone cut it down. The burning cat is still burning and Death not only eats his poop but drinks his pee also. O Bane is about as stupid as The Wall gimmick and some chick shrikes because she noticed that she a pimple that looks like Death on her ass]
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