|
|
|
| Fredrick J. Ostrander The scoop is here! All details are filled in with updates from agents in the field. |
Updates: Fred poses as scoutmaster. In Oriskay, NY, Fred became a scoutmaster for a week while visiting the Catskills. Agents have confirmed that scoutmaster Fred lead troop 756 for a little over a month. His escapades with the scouts included presiding over the traditional pine wood derby, hiking through Finger Lakes National Forest, and directing the annual one act play. This year's play was entitled "Jack or the Submission." Fred enshrined in Hall of Fame With outstanding academic skills, Fred was able to garner a perfect score on the Mars Pathfinder quiz. For his prowess, the Martian society inducted him into their Martian Hall of Fame. Fred's knowledge on this Martian probe leads our agents to believe Fred may be preparing to build a Martian Lander. NASCAR says it was possible Fred was in pit NASCAR did not confirm Fred's presence on the Rusty Wallace pit crew, but said it was possible Fred could have been with members of the pit crew. During the Daytona 500, our spy cameras caught glimpses of Fred in coveralls near the track. He had a few wrenches and a yellow flag in his possession. Fred appeared to be in good spirits as he slapped the backs of some the world's best racers. Disguised as Canoer A feature in the Bordentown (N.J.) Gazette, included an interview with Fred. The interview claims Fred to be 72 years old and an avid canoer. In studying a picture that accompanied the article, our agents deduced that Fred was using a clever disguise to fool the reporter. An unnamed source said Fred was preparing for a role in the play On Golden Pond when the reporter approached him. Fred played along with the act making claims he commuted to New York via canoe for thirty years. Now that's a lot of portages. |