insult response

At mockexams2001 we arn't going to lie to you, life is hard. At certain points in said life, you will face insults, we know we have, and still do. Therefore we felt it neccesary to produce this:

zandrew's complete guide to insult response management course :

  • if the insult is phrased thus: "you are a (INSERT INSULT)"

    respond thus: "your mum is a (REPEAT THERE INSULT)"

    to test this theory zandrew set about challenging it:
    zan:> grim you are a bat eating cock worm
    grim:> your mum is a bat eating cock worm
    zan:> oh gosh, you got me there
    (zan departs running)

  • though if the insult is a phrased as a instruction e.g. "go away you silly head" you should respond: "make me".
  • now if faced with a situation where your adversary is familiar with this oral battle technique the only possible response would be: "make me make you".
    this can be repeated and added to many times for example, "make me make you make me" etc.
  • this can be added to and twisted by adding such jointy as: "make your mum make me" which always raises a laugh in our household.
  • after reading these basic steps and practicing them daily you should become a proficiant "come-back merchant".
  • Click the Back button to try another link.


© zandrew and john moron
(who has recieved many insults himself. the cock.)