Presidential Candidate Debate # 3 which occurred on 13 October 2004
took place within the state of Arizona
and was moderated by Bob.
The two participants of the debate were President George Bush and Senator John Kerry.
[ A Politically-Correct Rough Paraphrase? ]
BOB: Senator Kerry, is it not true that many of the problems
which have occurred under the Bush administration were because of
non-cooperative partisan democrats in Congress who voted against or in other ways thwarted propositions from both Bush and Republicans?
KERRY [with a serious definitive look]: Bob, this country is
divided like it has never been before. Things have gotten worse under this
President, like no other president of either party since 1928. Though some jobs have been 'created' by Bush it is another thing for middle-class unemployed to actually become employed with such. Bush has cut unemployment benefits and forced people to pay for higher-priced education while no checks were coming in meanwhile to pay their monthly bills. Jobs have been lost (which Bush is obviously directly to blame for, and not the greedy-for-gain corporate execs who themselves laid people off and outsourced job to cheap non-american-union labor overseas). I cannot look union leaders straight in the eye and tell them their jobs won't be outsourced overseas. We must pay-as-you-go, like under Clinton. Tax the very rich, and thus keep Social Security solvent until 2075. Because of Bush and the Republicans, it is illegal for Medicare to get drugs in bulk, like the VA does, and cheap nontested flu-vaccine drugs from homosexual-AIDS-infected Canada are disallowed by this president. Gas prices have gone up (again, directly because of Bush and NO one else causing service stations to jack up the pump prices), as have health care costs (thanks to Bush's timber business and pharmaceutical companies like Halliburton, not to mention John Edward's $600,000-tax-cut S Corporation). Close those loopholes, tax the big companies and thus bring in huge revenue, causing big-company execs to merge corporations, dissolve and re-emerge big companies under different names, and raise consumer prices on goods they manufacture and sell. Because of Bush's tax cuts, there is a deficit instead of a surplus. The war has not increased the economy but instead depleted it...look at the crabs legs and the $25,000 Harley I drive. All these programs I am proposing for the American people will have to be paid by someone somehow - maybe a coalition as we raise troop levels. Most people could not afford the high-priced Blue Cross voluntary health plan I and my millionaire wife have. 4000 illegal immigrants per day are sneaking across the border, some with alleged Middle East ties.
BOB [As Bush looks at Kerry with brisk indignation]: Mr. President?
BUSH [as Kerry looks at Bush with reserved dignified expectancy for the answer]: We have more border patrols now than before. We could not pussyfoot around eternally trying to negotiate coerced alliances with a hardhead like Saddam, nor give amnesty to illegal aliens, but instead give hardworking and diligent Chinese and Mexicans work permits. We have affirmative action and minority support programs in effect.
KERRY: The weaker gender does need help to go non-domestic outside their children's home and instead horn in and harass men in their workplace, causing confusion, consternation, irritation, and worse. We need to use modern identification techniques to get people across the border faster without delay.
BOB: Mr. President, is homosexuality a choice?
BUSH: We must love our neighbor as ourselves. We must show
tolerance to everyone. I proposed amending the Constitution to define marriage as union between a man and woman. People are free to have the type of relationships they desire. I do not know if being gay is a choice.
BOB Senator Kerry?
KERRY [with a wry look in his eyes]: You sure blew that opportunity to
reassure Christian-Right voters, who perhaps still might swing your way, George, because of your RECORD....in SPITE of your fear of the faces of Mary and her wrongfully-defensive mother in this audience. You know dam well that no one is born homopervert, but instead the deliberately waywardchoose that DISGUSTING and SICKENING sexual orientation against
decent and plainly-sensible human rights of women who would normally have
received the full heterosexual affection due them but are deprived because
of twisted disbelieving reject-Scripture rebellion. The constitution
provides equality for all LAW-abiding citizens, especially Christians and their obedient straight-headed Christlike purity and chastity. Some people are born with 'original-sin' proclivity towards disobeying the clear revealed will of God revealed in His HOLY BIBLE and take an atheist-like
defiant wrong turn toward homosexuality, like Cheney's lesbian daughter,
so should we discriminate against them by denying them benefits by
supporting the Defense of Marriage Act which I voted against? And you
call me an inconsistent flipflopper!
WHY be so hard on homogays, while your running mate hypocritically harbors them and you condemn US for it? And a Vice-President'sdaughter, for cripe sake!
Even Nader and Peroutka nor their running mates do NOT - to my knowledge - have homopervert daughters who can (in one way or another) disasterously influence their policy decisions for the entire nation!
BOB: Mr. President, what about abortion? Will you overturn Roe
v. Wade? What kind of judges will you appoint concerning this?
BUSH [as Kerry looks down at the top of his podium with a silent smile and appears to write things down on paper]: I have no litmus tests for judges. Each citizen is not required to worship and pray to [whoever]. I pray [to .......] every day. They can worship or not worship whatever god they want or don't want. There was broad bipartisan support for the ban against partial-birth abortion, and you - Senator Kerry - voted against it!
We can decrease abortion through education and adoption.
BOB: Senator Kerry?
KERRY: [as Bush bristles with impudent and arrogant indignation, looking at Kerry with mock shock]: A man is justified by works, not by faith alone: Look at my flipflop record during the past 20 years, trying to reach a common-ground consensus so we could get something popular accomplished. We must have faith in god. You shall love the lord god with all your heart and soul....and your neighbor as yourself. I disagree with catholic bishops who insist that a secular political leader who was an altar boy has to accomodate to everyone in a democracy and yet impose his specific sectarian religion on everyone, particularly involving the constitutional right of a woman to choose. It is her choice - between her, her doctor, and god.
BOB: Senator Kerry, would you raise the Minimum Wage?
KERRY: Absolutely, it is long overdue. I would phase in increases
every year. You can't pay monthly bills with pie-in-the-sky-by-and-by
'get-an-education' ideology.
BOB: Mr. President?
BUSH: More math and science education is the key to more and better jobs.
BOB: Mr. President, would you screw up Social Security?
BUSH: The old people have gotten their SS checks since year 2000,
haven't they? I would allow young workers to invest some of their FICA
into the stock market for their retirement - and as you remember, the stock
market crashed before I came into office.
KERRY: If younger workers don't pay their normal FICA Withholding amounts from their paychecks into Social Security, there will be a huge revenue gap. Not only that, but that jeopardizes the whole Income Tax boondoggle of which Total Social Security Withheld is an integral part in The Annual-Burdensome-Bookkeeping and Revenue-Source-Snooping IRS Form 1040 every year.
BOB: Mr. President, what do you think of your strong women?
BUSH: I listen to them.
BOB: Senator Kerry?
KERRY [with a huge nice-white-teeth-showing smile]: I was fortunate
enough to marry into money, and I compliment you on your First Lady, Mr.
President. My dying mother said to me: 'Integrity....Integrity....Integrity.' So I teamed up with Ted Kennedy and Barney Frank in Massachusetts - who won't be around forever: every dog has its day. My vast want-someone-new, despise-Christian-right-moralists, lawn-sign/bumper-sticker/libelous-TV-ad, head-up-their-rectum gullibles really suck it up.
BUSH: Think how my opponent voted to raise taxes many more times than he claimed to cut taxes. You are one sly and deceptive, two-faced phony, Senator, but you sure have a likeable-looking, dignified and stately, calm-spirited demeanor as you talk the talk with empty promises and take credit for many of my own Republican ideas and accomplishments.
BOB: That's the end of the debates, folks, but not the end of the campaigning.
[The mopheaded legs-bared daughters of Bush and the mopheaded legs-bared daughters of Kerry come up on stage, visually defiling and optically sexually assaulting the audience and polluting the TV screen with their pornographic partial immodesty]