The "What the hell is that guy on?" Page.
Right. So you didn't understand what Budd/Matt/Matthew/Spanky meant in one/some/all strip/s. Firstly, I suggest taking far too many vitamin C pills while drinking an unhealthy amount of straight red AND green cordial at the same time as pure coffee grounds. Now that you're sufficiently high, you'll probably "understand" everything, as well as finding everything funny. Which would be good. Because at least SOMEbody would find my strip amusing. My second suggestion is that you read the rest of this wonderfully un-informative description of... Ah, who'm I kidding. I'm just gonna ramble. Ooooh! Lunch is ready!
Do not eat this site.
Bitte nicht essen.
Ne mangez pas cette page.
Nature Friendly   (8/05/01) :
This one was almost an advertisement for my site. Sort of. Note that the beaver was either dead and/or stuffed or fainted. Where apon you see that the beaver is missing the fur on it's back. Note the suspicious coulour similarity between the beavers fur and my new vest. I guess it was a comment on how being nature friendly has become fashionable, but nothing really seems to be in actual fact "nature friendly" except that the sign that was made out of was made from 100% recycled paper.
S-Bahn   (29/04/01) :
I believe this was the first one I ever did. In my school book (I think I didn't erase some of the lines in there). I think the characters look a lot like monkeys. This was really a personal thing (not even really shared enough to be a personal joke). The first time I rode the S-Bahn in Berlin I was afraid of the doors, as they slam shut really hard. So hard that sometimes they bounce back to being open again before they close properly. This immediately caused me to fervently believe that the s-bahn came directly from satan's left nipple. Hence the cross. The other character could possibly, as an afterthought, be Evgeny, the Russian exchange student, but he has blonde hair. I'm not even sure whether or not that's funny.
The Microsoft Empire (29/04/01):
I don't really know why I drew this one. I have nothing against Microsoft, and in a way, it's good that everyone has the same, compatible software. It makes things a lot simpler. Although I do wish they'd FINISH WHAT THEY START OUT MAKING, rather than sending it all out the day that they set 3 years ago, when they'd first thought about it, because Windows is so full of bugs and all sorts of errors that were never fixed. I got tired of Windows crashing on me, and realized because Microsoft is a monopoly, there's jack you can do about it. I mean, it's either windows or a mac. And macintosh computers remind me too much of primary school.
That thing in the last frame is a net. Microsoft abducted me because I damned them.
Time and Again (29/04/01):
This one I was just paying out this girl I'd just met in Berlin. Her name is Sarah, and she's actually a very cool person. I like to call her Sparrow. She doesn't really talk like that either, but she does tend to be thinking of 4 things at once, and it's very hard to keep up with her in a conversation. So in a way, I'm just a little jealous of having a guy's mind, that is, only being able think of one thing at a time. It's something that I always find astounding about the female gender. It's impossible for us to comprehend what this would be like. But yes. At the end I make a comment about it being time for her to be going home which could have been understood as me saying she has PMS. Which is why she knees me in the groin.
Birthday Surprise (9/05/01):
This was just a more personal way of making my sisters birthday more special. Note that she didn't check my site until several days after her birthday. I don't know where the hell that half a chinese Elephant (his name is Lao Than) came from. But he got there. And like the other animals that occasionally appear in my comics, he's just there not to make sense, or to sing when we're in the mood..
The Notorious Brown   (10/05/01) :
Commenting on the ridiculous colours that come into fashion. Sometimes they clash ridiculously, and I just don't like the colour brown, for clothes. That last guy is Lexamay (pig latin), who I've always thought was gay/a geek/a prick/a tosser/annoying/badly but expensively dressed. So in reality, he'd only buy brown clothes if they cost at least 200DM. Hes a prat.
The Schoolies Fridge   (14/05/01):
First strip I did with Silas in it. I don't know what I was trying to say there. But yes. Silas is the guy trying to sleep on the couch (that guy sleeps more than I do!) and doesn't notice/care that I just got sucked into the fridge by the fetid milk. Note that on schoolies there was 1 bed too few so we had a couch rotation thing going on, but Silas didn't actually sleep on the couch at all, because he had sex in the master on the first night, and noone else wanted to sleep in it after that. I also escaped this cycle, because I shared one of the other bedrooms with a female friend of mine, who for obvious reasons was exempt from the cycle, and me being the only one in the apartment that knew her...
Pogo Fun    (15/05/01)  :
I don't really know how to explain this one. I just like the sound of "Self proclaimed king of pop-culture" and decided to use it as an excuse to shoot Silas, and steal a pogo stick. Because if there's anything I could think of that would be more futile than stealing a pogo stick, it'd be beetroot. Which I hate. No offence to Silas' stolen beetroot. I wonder if Warwicks new house is full of Property of Silas and Property of Budd stickers. I mean, Silas claimed the toilet and beetroot. If that isn't saying anything about beetroot, err. I will.
Wizard o' Oz (27/05/01) :
Trying to add all the real characters I'd used in a single strip. And that'd probably be one of the things I still think is funny from Downlands days. Cross dressing. Not that I'd actually be able to do it in real life... Oh wait. English, yr 12. Well trotsdem, it was still fun to draw me as Dorothy. Silas is the lion, Lao Than is the metal man, Sarah is the scarecrow. I saw a picture of a bunch of people who went to some sort of parade dressed as Dorothy, Metalman, the lion, Scarecrow AND the wizard of Oz. Now ask youself. If they'd already found the wizard, why the hell would they need to go anywhere? They could just stay at home play, Cluedo, eat nachos and drink beer.
Raining Beer   (04/06/01):
This was where I really think I found my style. The faces are still a bit wonky, but it wasn't a bad start. I didn't really start off with a plan for the script in this one, it was just, conversation. I'm not really sure whether it's be "funny" or not. But it's me and Silas. Who had red hair at the time. Oh, and Silas really likes Coopers.
The Vines   (18/06/01) :
I was sitting in the wintergarden with my guest parents just talking, and I was telling a story about the psycho pidgeons somewhere. The German word for pidgeons is Tauben. The german word for vines or grapes is Trauben. Well I mixed up the two words, making it sound like the vines at my pizza. I wanted to show that I can't speak perfect German (and for me at the moment it's really not an issue if I ever do. I just don't see it as being something I'll ever need again, except to speak to tourists perhaps, where apon my current level of German, where I can understand practically everything, as long as it's not technical or deeply theoretical, is more than enough. Note that Christa in a shorter amount of time and with a much shorter amount of pre exchange study learned the language perfectly, and now gloats apon this fact like a, err. gloating thing. She's tried to encourage me to actually try, but I really couldn't be bothered. Girls probably wouldn't talk to me if I was perfect.
Naked Kung-Fu (the battle of the bathroom) (19/06/01):
I was tired of Arne being so damn impolite and plain iriitating/nasty to me. Which he's pretty much the whole time. He's purposely trying to piss me off, which he does to everyone. His whole life is based around getting negative reactions from everybody in his direct sight. Do you think this could be considered to be ADD? What he doesn't realise is that his friends get tired of it as quickly as everyone else. I've had most of his friends ask me how I could stand to live with him, and I must say at times it's been trying. The seal was just there to lighten the humour a bit. Note that arne was running more from the fact that in my naked kung fu, I'd be touching him while I was naked, then I ended up hugging the seal, while we were both naked.
The Great Escape    (07/08/01) :
Warwick and I stealing Silas' beer by distracting him with daytime telivision shows, making him think it's 9:00. We are foiled however when a branch falls on the powerlines and it becomes dark.