The following is an excerpt from a children's book,

"Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants",
by Dav Pilkey

The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names ....

Use the first letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name:	Use the first letter of your last name to determine the first half of your NEW last name:	Use the last letter of your last name to determine the second half of your NEW last name:
a = stinky b = lumpy c = buttercup d = gidget e = crusty f = greasy g = fluffy h = cheeseball i = chim-chim j = poopsie k = flunky l = booger m = pinky n = zippy o = goober p = doofus q = slimy r = loopy s = snotty t = falafel u = dorkey v = squeezit w = oprah x = skipper y = dinky z = zsa-zsa	a = diaper b = toilet c = giggle d = bubble e = girdle f = barf g = lizard h = waffle i = cootie j = monkey k = potty l = liver m = banana n = rhino o = burger p = hamster q = toad r = gizzard s = pizza t = gerbil u = chicken v = pickle w = chuckle x =tofu y = gorilla z = stinker	a = head b = mouth c = face d = nose e = tush f = breath g = pants h = shorts i = lips j = honker k = butt l = brain m = tushie n = chunks o = hiney p = biscuits q = toes r = buns s = fanny t = sniffer u = sprinkles v = kisser w = squirt x = humperdinck y = brains z = juice

Thus, for example, George Bush's new name is Fluffy Toiletshorts. I bet he'll love it.
Escape Captian Underpants