Who Dunnit?!

"YEEEEEOOOOOWWW!"
Murdoc leapt up from his chair and glared at the offending object. His eyes began to water from the discomfort, and he gingerly rubbed his stinging posterior.
"Murdoc...?"
Hearing Murdoc's cry, 2D walked into the kitchen of the Winnebago.
"What's the ma..."
Murdoc spun round.
"Why, you little SHIT! I'm gonna demolish you for that!"
"But...I..." 2D stuttered.
He didn't have time to finish. Murdoc lunged at him, sending porn magazines and a half empty bottle of Vodka flying through the air.
2D froze. The cigarette he was smoking dropped onto his bare arm, making him jump, returning him to the real world, and the present life or death situation he was facing.
"Wah!"
He turned to run, jumping over various items of clothing that were casually strewn across the lino. He dived towards the door and flung it open.
Murdoc, in a sudden surge of blind rage, tripped over the stray vodka bottle, landing heavily on his already bruised behind.
He winced, and then got up to finish what he'd begun. He dusted himself down, growling and mumbling satanic curses under his halitosoid breath, then carried on in pursuit of 2D.

Noodle crawled out from behind the Winnebago, giggling as she watched Murdoc running off, hopping every few strides to take the strain off his punctured buttock.
She made her way up to Kong Studios, and as she came up the steps leading to the main entrance, she could hear the all too common din of ceramic objects smashing, and the unmistakable shouting of an enraged Murdoc.
She walked through the door to find Murdoc still chasing after 2D. She collapsed in a heap on the floor in a fit of hysterics.
And so with Noodle's laughing and Murdoc's hollering and 2D's whimpering, in walks Russel to the lobby, having taken a detour from the kitchen, to check out the source of all the commotion.
As he stepped out of the lift, the scene that greeted him was absolute chaos. It was as though World War 3 had broken out-Objects were being hurled across the room, and tables and chairs had been upturned where 2D had attempted to make trenches so as to hide from Murdoc's temper.
A large ornamental ceramic plate whistled past Russ, narrowly missing him.
"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!" He bellowed.
Suddenly the room ceased to stir-inanimate objects no longer moved with impulsion around Russel's head, and he could now move forward without fear of ending up like 2D.
His gaze lifted from the mess and onto Murdoc, who had his hands round 2D's neck.
"Release him, Murdoc...",
Not wanting to start anything with 360 lb. of NY hard man, Murdoc let 2D go. 2D tended to his bruises and rubbed his neck, grateful that it was still in one piece.
"Now..." Russel continued, "What's all the fuss about?"
Murdoc bent over and dropped his pants.
"THAT'S what the fuss is about!" he glowered.
Russel raised an eyebrow, and a smile spread across his face; Murdoc's right butt cheek was pretty sore looking- all purple where a bruise was forming around the puncture hole.
"Some saddo placed a pin on my seat...!"
He glared round at 2D who had gotten up to stand by Russel to look at the damage.
In the corner Noodle giggled.
" What you laughing at, short stuff!?"
Noodle shut up.
"Did you sit on it Murdoc?" enquired 2D.
Both Murdoc and Russel sighed at 2D's naively.
"Take a wild guess, numb nuts...!" retorted Murdoc.
"...Yes?"
"Bravo Brainache!" Replied Murdoc.
"You know, you should really get that seen to, Murdoc."
"Shut it, tosspot! Who asked you for your opinion?"
Murdoc dressed himself and took a deep breath. He shoved passed 2D and walked into the lift.
"This ain't over, Dullard..." he hissed.
The doors closed behind him, and the 3 of them were left down in the lobby.
Russel sighed.
"Come on Two, we best catch him up."
Russ looked over to the corner where Noodle was still sat.
"And you Noodle- come on."
Noodle jumped up and followed after 2D.They both followed Russel into the lift once Murdoc had finished using it.

They exited the lift and scouted around for Murdoc. They found him playing pool.
"You alright Murdoc?"
No answer.
Noodle went in and sat down whilst 2D hid behind the doorframe, wanting to avoid a confrontation.
Murdoc came to life.
"If that shit-faced walking coma victim so much as looks at me, I'm going to ram this cue down his scrawny little throat." He said, matter-of-factly, to no one in particular.
"Now come on Murdoc, how do you know it WAS 2D?"
Murdoc sat down on the sofa.
"Hmmm?" Russel pushed him.
Murdoc remained silent. He hated not being able to answer a question, especially when he knew he was wrong, when he knew he couldn't prove something, and THAT he never liked to admit to- Murdoc, as far as he was concerned, was ALWAYS right.
Russel's stare was intimidating, and made Murdoc shift uneasily on the couch.
"It always is him...When has it ever not been?"
"Have you asked him yet?"
"Don't have to- I KNOW it's him"
"2D!" Called Russel
2D walked warily into the room. Murdoc didn't bother turning round or saying anything.
"2D-Did you put that pin on Murdoc's chair?"
"N...n...no, it wa...wasn't me..." he replied sheepishly.
Murdoc shot a glance at Russel and then turned round to face 2D.
"Wha...? Don't lie, knob end! You know it was you, I know it was you, now fuck off."
"But..." 2D tried his hardest to explain to Murdoc, but it just wasn't getting him anywhere. He began to get impatient with Murdoc's smart-arse remarks, and finally couldn't stand it any more.
"FOR FUCK'S SAKE! I SAID IT WEREN'T ME!" He shouted.
The sudden change of tone in 2D's voice made everyone jump, and Murdoc turned round, amazed at the aggression in the singer's voice.
"Hey, bro! Chill!" soothed Russel.
"No!" replied 2D stubbornly; "I'm not going to take this kinda crap from that smelly bastard any longer! I've had enough!"
Murdoc, now thoroughly pissed off, jumped up from the sofa, intending to beat the back-chatter shittless, but Russel grabbed his arm.
"Leave it..." he warned.
His own sudden outburst left 2D with a headache, and he pulled up a chair in the corner of the room by the window, with a packet of paracetomol and a glass of water.
It was Murdoc's turn...
"WHO THE FUCK D'YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" He started.
Russel still had a hold of his arm, restraining the malevolent-minded bassist, and refused to let go. Murdoc writhed under the percussionists grip, but got nowhere.
The abuse came thick and fast, and continued for 15 whole minutes- poor 2D just sat in his chair, rubbing his head, and winced as his brain pounded and throbbed inside his skull, moaning and denying Murdoc's accusations.
All the while, Noodle had been sat in the corner taking it all in, but she realized that her little prank had gone slightly too far, and, as a result, 2D was taking all the blame for it as per usual. She hated the way Murdoc was verbally beating him, and he did so to the point where 2D was actually beginning to wonder whether he actually had done it.
Even Russel's booming American voice was now no match for Murdoc's truculent language and cursing, and 2D still sat, rubbing his eyes, trying to ignore the abuse being hurled at him. Then, from the corner, Noodle got up and screeched.
"Wesso! Shi-lay Norah akahn tache 2D!"
No one took any notice...at first.
She tried again.
"WESSO! SHI-LAY NORAH AKAHN TACHE 2D!!!"
Suddenly the abuse stopped, but 2D continued to nurse his thudding head.
"What d'ya say, lil dude?" Asked Russel
The doll spoke from behind a cushion on the sofa.
"Hey! Leave 2D alone!" It repeated.
Noodle continued with her little speech while the room was quiet, and Murdoc had stopped shouting.
"Ti layrah phyrik 2D...toi yazmah in- cheerda voudrais toi..."
The doll translated the oriental gibberish.
"It wasn't 2D...I did it- it was me..."
She looked down at her feet, before meeting Russel's eyes. He sighed wearily.
"Still convinced it was Two?" He said to Murdoc.
Murdoc looked confused. He turned round to Noodle, who was now making her way over to 2D to say sorry for all the misunderstanding.
"But..." Said Murdoc.
2D stood up to walk out the door, and Russel let go of Murdoc's arm.
"Oh, sorry 2D- I thought it was you! How stupid am I? I can't apologize enough!"
Said 2D in a mock apologetic, girly tone, which was aimed at Murdoc. Then continued out of the room.
"The kid has a point, Murdoc." Said Russel, all for Stu-Pot.
Noodle followed after 2D, and Russel dragged Murdoc downstairs with him. However painful it was for Murdoc to be sympathetic, he knew he'd have to apologize to 2D.
"Look, sorry kid, bout all that back there..." He hesitated.
Feeling the blood rise to the surface of his skin, Murdoc grabbed a bottle of Vodka, and headed out towards his Winne. Feeling a right dickhead at being shamed up in front of his band, he hid behind a newspaper, and shut the curtains to evade the outside world

(Back in Kong Studios)
"Hey, you alright bro?" Asked Russel.
His headache had made his eyesight and hearing a little hazy.
"Huh...what...who the...? Oh, it's you Russ...Yeah, I'm fine."
Russel smiled down at the dosed up singer, still whining and cradling his head.
Noodle came in and sat down next to him, and asked him to play Pokemon.
"No thanks Noodle, I've got a headache. Later maybe..."
Noodle left the table, feeling a bit disgruntled. She looked up at Russel.
"Sorry kiddo- looking after 2D here." he shrugged.
"I'm gonna go an' have a lie down, I think." Suggested 2D.
"You do that bro."
Russel sat down at the table in the café, and buried his head in his hands- what a stressful day it'd been! But at least he'd seen Murdoc get a taste of his own medicine, and 2D had finally had the courage to talk back to Murdoc, which, he betted, he would regret when Murdoc got over is embarrassment.
It's a mad world when you're animated!