Assalamu alaikum wr wb,

Hi! My name is Hanifa(I chose that name because it is the closest thing to Islam)and I'm 18 from Ireland. I have been muslim ALHAMDULILLAH since March 99 ! Allahuakbar! I am engaged to an East African brother, and InshaAllah will marry soon. I'd like to tell you how I REVERTED (we are all born muslim)and accepted Al Islam but first I will tell you a  bit about my ealry years...

My family are all catholic(ASTAGHFIRULLAH)and so is the rest of my country.We went to mass on Sundays when I was really young,then it got less and less that when I was about 11 we only went at christmas. After my confirmation,we stopped even doing that. My parents aren't very religious,they don't exactly practise catholicism but since my reversion,I've realised that they have a firm believe in Jesus as the son of God astaghfirullah and catholicism has been embedded into them from when they were young(Ireland USED to be a strict catholic country)  They claim to be openminded and accepting of other cultures etc,they say someone's religion doesn't matter but that's talking about my fiance,not me -it matters when it's me!Having said this,my parents are great parents and in every other way - the best. I pray InshaAllah,they will find the truth and be guided by Allah(swt)

So,I would only pray when I needed something,I never remembered the prayers so I would just ask God for this or that. I think I got a lot of signs throughout my life but never followed them.In fairness maybe I was too young to understand but when I was 17 (a year and 3 mths ago)I started reading about Islam on the internet even though I had never been interested in it before. Religion never interested me,even in all the time I knew my fiance(3 yrs now Alhamdulillah) & knew he was muslim.I suppose it could be because I knew already in my heart that God could not have partners or offspring & seen as Christianity was the only thing I considered,I gave up on religion and I ignored it.(why is it that we are so brainwashed into thinking Islam is just a oppressive soceity to women,we never even stop to ask ourselves,what do we know about it?) Anyway,thinking back now I've had so many signs & chances from Allah(swt)to follow the truth.

One of the earliest signs I can remember was when I was very little.I actually don't know if I remember the dream anymore or if I remember remembering :-)It was a recurring dream that I was walking in a huge park with Mary,mother of Isa(ra)who I was taught as a child was the "mother of God"ASTAGHFIRULLAH. When we left the entrance gates a red ball would appear & I could sense evil(shaitan),I didn't know how but I knew for sure it was the devil & he would hurt me. Mary(ra) just disappeared,at the time I thought she wouldn't help me but maybe it was she couldn't??? Also,this is what Mary(ra)&Isa(pbuh)will do to those who worship them on the last day,they will disown them and be witnesses against them,and the disbelievers will have no help against shaitan.(I seek refuge with Allah from shaitan the outcast.Aimeen.)

Anyway,she walked away and left me. People used to say I must have fear of abandonment or that I didn't trust or was insecure etc but it didn't make sense because I wasn't insecure,I had no issues with trust or abandoment... Now it is so obvious to me but it makes me wonder how many other signs I received but didn't follow.But then,WAS THAT A SIGN OR WAS IT MY SUB-CONCIOUS TELLING ME WHAT I KNEW DEEP DOWN?????? Allah(swt)knows best.

A very scary incident was when I was 14. I was with a friend in town one day and it was a nice summers day so we decided to go to the nearby park when this young man(early twenties)approached us showing us his wrists(which were both severly cut)I thought he was a drug addict or something(or had slit his wrists),especially when he started talking about how God had saved him etc...He pointed to a man with a white beard crossing the road and said he'd disappear when we crossed(naturally we did lose him in the crowd)He said the man was God,his father and he was Jesus.He said he had saved him and that it was his first day in Ireland and his last,he told us to look in the papers for him in the next few days and he would appear somewhere else in the world,in a statue.He talked to us for a long time & was particularly interested in my friend,warning her that she must pray.I can't even remember all the stuff he said but it was psycho and at the time I was really scared.He told us to go to mass to pass our exams and that we must go to the nearest church were there was a statue of Mary who had a rose in her hand,he said if we looked at the statue it would look back.Then he said that we couldn't tell anyone or God would know and we would be betraying God.He said only we could see him & asked us to ask someone if they could see him,when we turned back he was gone.We searched the park but couldn't find him and scared,we went to the church.He was right about the statue but it didn't exactly look at us.This story really frightened me for a long time...I never told anyone except until I met my fiance.Now I can laugh about it and feel sorry for the guy because there's obviously something wrong with him but I still think it's very strange.IS IT REALLY A COINCIDENCE OR WAS I SUPPOSED TO SEE THE STUPIDNESS OF THE TRINTY???? At the time I wrote pages and pages of notes to Allah(swt)asking him why he was doing this to me,making me so confused.I didn't want to accept what the man said,if it was the devil leading me astray but I thought how can I ignore it if it was true? I wrote to God how lonely I felt and scared and confused by it and I prayed for the truth to come to me,okay it was a little late(a couple of years)but Allah(swt)knows best. Maybe I wasn't ready to learn the truth.Allahu Alim.
 
It may seem silly now brothers & sisters but Allah's signs may not always be clear,everything in life has it's purpose.I once read a small booklet - It was about a young pagan boy who prayed to some sort of rock or stone,one day a dog urinated on the stone while the boy was praying to it...the moral was that although this seems pretty insignificant - it actually was a sign from Allah(swt)because after seeing this-the boy realised how could it be God? He then knew that God could not be an object or anything that could be harmed (it is similar with Isa pbuh because he cannot do anything without the help of Allah swt)

Anyway, back to my story-a few months before my 16th birthday I met my fiance,who Alhamdulillah is the best,kindest,most brilliant brother. We fell in love at first sight and now I wonder how could he have proposed after a month to a kufr. Still if he didn't,I may never have found the straight path. I had no problem with him being muslim but we did have the occasional arguement in the begining(astaghfirullah i would give him a hard time when he seemed too religious) My parents accept him and love him as their son,Alhamdulillah and I don't know what they'd do if we didn'tget married. InshaAllah,we will have nikkah very soon though! Anyway I visited the masjid with him and became more accepting of his needto pracitse Islam properly(even buying him eid gifts) Still,I never even thought about it as a religion.

We do plan,InshaAllah to live in Zanzibar which is muslim,so to tell you the truth,it was this that led me to Islam(not because I knew a muslim man the way so many non muslims think)I found out about Islam over the internet,Astaghfirullah for the wrong reasons. I felt guilty about not telling my fiance but I wanted to be sure what the rights of women were in different muslim countries we might visit. After reading some Islamic websites,I became interested to talk to muslims and sneek out any bad things from them about it,Astaghfirullah. So,I went to a muslim message board and pretended to be muslim. There were muslims arguing over certain rules and I couldn't really comment cos I didn't know enough. This went on for a few weeks,I was really interested then and kept pretending I knew as much as them(I've no idea why)I was starting to see Islam differently but still it was just nosiness really and I hadn't thought of it as a religion.I would state my views,using quotes I'd heard until I couldn't answer some of the people because I didn't know.(the first words I learnt(besides assalam alaikum,Quran which i knew)on that page were:muslima,hijab,zeenah and hadith.Well,one night,I did it...I said,hey I'm gonna read The Quran so I'll have an idea what I'm talking about.

So,I found a translation by M.M.Khan online(I now have a copy of it) First,I read the intro about how the Quran has been preserved and I couldn't believe it,they didn't just rely on faith but proof too. I realised that I might be about to read something holy and I was scared and excited. It finally hit me that Islam might be the true religion. By the time I got to Surat Al Baqarah I was crying and I knew it was true(I was also a little scared)I kept reading,on and on all night and for I don't know how many days afterwards. That night I told my fiance(but I said I was just reading it)and he was SO surprised,he thought I was joking and I felt a bit stupid,like no one would take me seriously but ALHAMDULILLAH,my fiance has been a wonderful wonderful support. He just wanted me to take it slow so I wouldn't reject it after reading it(as this is a great sin)and he really didn't want my reversion to have anything to do with him,he wanted it to be for Allah(swt)alone and to be sure I truly believed. I don't know what I would have done without him,he is the only good muslim(besides an elderly family we sometimes visit)that I know in Ireland(not that there's many)He has taught me so much about Islam and he now tells me that I have taught him a lot about it too(I study Islam as much as I can),InshaAllah we will continue to increase eachothers Iman.

Well,that is how I became muslim(believe me that's the short version)If you want to know how I've adjusted to Islam,get to know me and you'll see !(it has been pretty easy 4 me anyway as I've never liked pork and hadn't drank since I met my fiance) MahsaAllah,I am delighted to find a place for sisters and brothers to exchange stories. Jazakallahu kheir to the administrators! May Allah(swt)guide us all and lead us to Jannah. INSHALLAH.AIMEEN. 

Allah Hafiz,
Hanifa.

LA ILAHA ILLALLAH !!!!