Converts' Stories: Nadia's Testimony

Nadia's Testimony (from reVert)

I would like to address the trials that a person goes through when they convert, I converted 7 years ago and still I have trials to go through, I thought that I would get easier with time, but I was wrong, Alhamduallah I Was blessed to be introduced to Islam and I felt that I had found the truth and that my troubles would be over and that Alhamduallah I would find peace in my life, but I found that in some aspects I had peace in my life and in others I was in the struggle for my life.

I had gone through a Divorce and found my self raising two sons on my own and their father was a scarce when it came to his sons, butI was able to accept that fact, I felt that I had no other choice but to move in with my parents and hopefully with their help I would make it through the divorce and the struggle financially, I was feeling extremely guilty about the Divorce so I consulted with my Pastor and he told me that I sould feel guilty about the Divorce from my husband because Women are to submit to thier husbands and accept them for all thier faults, by the way my husband was cheating on me with several different women at a time and then he would come to me when things were not going to great with his girlfriends, I was so confused and did not know what to do, so when he asked for a legal separation I agreed and then went one step further and asked for a divorce.

After my divroce things seemed to be ok but i was missing something in my life, I had by the way stopped going to church and continued to stay away from religion because I felt that religion had betrayed me and did not see my side of things. I decided to go to College and while there I met so people and they were my classmates they were from another country and they were friendly and we were all good friends, they knew about my divorce and soon they learned about my leaving church and having doubts about God, One of them asked me if I knew anything about Muslims, I said no thinking it was a type of food, they tehn asked me if I knew what Islam was I said no, they asked me i I would like to know more about it I said sure, I was curious so they unloaded a ton of liturature on me ( they were all part of the MSA of my University) I decided I would read it later, but one night i was feeling really down and I decided to read some of the liturature, I found that it was very uplifting and it made me feel so good about myself and I thought that I would really like to be part of this, I read how Allah , is merciful and how he has designed the perfect religion for us all, I also read about Divorce in Islam and I found that not only is it allowed but that not one person has to take all the blame and what my ex husband had done was the gravest sin, I decided to convert after about a mont of study and believe me the day I converted I cried out of happiness for the rest of the day.

Alhamdulallah that was the happiest day of my life, I then learned to pray and the wonderful peace that comes along with that and the great inner peace that I obtained. Telling my parents was another thing that was a real trial, they knew that I had muslim friends and that I associated with them exclusively and they began to suspect something. My parents are Southern Baptist and they are also very intollernt of any other culture or religion,so I kept my conversion to myself and enjoyed the time I spent with my Sisters in Islam, I concentrated on my children and my religion and I had the goal to move out of my parents home and into a place of my own, the fights with my parents had become unbearable, they had come to the point that they would lock me out of the house sometimes and they absolutely refused to let me have my children they acted like my children were thier own, I finally moved out and I was so happy It was after Ramadan and during Eid one of the sisters she came to my home and found me living on macaroni and cheese and spaghetti, I told her that all I could afford was that and i went without food so my children could eat, but alhamduallah i was happy to be making my prayers in my own home and read Quran openly and i was happy, I had made a prayer during the La Latul Qadr, for Allah to do what was best for me and keep us safe, I did not ask for anything special just that Allah bless us, and Alhamduallah, two months after moving into my parents home and 5 years after converting, I got married to a wonderful brother who also was a convert we were very happy and my deen was complete, but our bliss would soon go away, for after our first year of marriage my parents decided to sue me for custody of my children and it was a difficult time for us, Alhamduallah my Ex-husband was on my side and we banded together to keep our sons and with the help of Allah we prevailed,

Alhamdulallah my husband paid for the entire lawsuit because he felt it was a grave injustice that was being done. We still have to deal with my parents because of the settlement agreement but we have decided that it will not affect us and our family. Alhamduallah my oldest son who is 12 has decided to accept Islam as his way of life and he has even chosen a wonderful Islamic name Ridwan, he is a good Muslim MAshallah and I am happy. As a Muslim I know that there will always a obstacle in my life for one reason or another, and I know that I am not the only Muslim in the world that has this problem, But we have Allah on our side and he will always protect us .

Asalamalikom wa rahmatuallah

Sister Nadia