Converts' Stories: Rukaiya's Testimony

Rukaiya's Testimony

When I became a Muslim, my friend who studied with me in England said:

"How come? You were the greatest opponent against Islam, remember? You were always heatedly attacking and bashing Islam, and why?"

People tend to easily forget what they do not want to remember, and I think I was also one of them.

I do not know whether the fact that I was born and brought up in Kyoto has affected me, a place surrounded by numerous temples and shrines, in another word the religious atmosphere. I definitely liked visiting those places, the solemnity and the tranquility, the dark shining wood floor, the smell of sent, the peaceful space are insisting of the characteristic, place of worship.

I was thinking religion is a creature of weak people who can not depend on himself. I was despising those believers, watching them with sympathizing eye.How weak they are, how cheap they are, how miserable and pity they are, and how stupid they are.

I wanted to be strong and independent and I was trying to be “materialistic”, being myself, not to believe in anything else and pursuing the pleasure of the moment.

Finally I totally denied any "religion". Consequently I could not find the value of marriage and family life, in another word the meaning of being human being. However I was not sure with my theory somewhere in my mind.

Every year in Japan so many people visit shrines in New Year Days and I was also one of them. Why we keep this "old-fashioned" custom? People may answer, "There is no where else to visit during New Year Days, that is the only reason." Or "I just like to see the architectures".

But is it true? I liked to see the people to "pray" with his hands together even very short moment. I felt the truth from the moment. We often see the secret from Holly Wood’s films. The hero is standing at bay, the enemy is attacking from the front, there is no place to run away, then he may say, "God, help me!" Japanese people may say, "No, I do never say that". Then what about suppose you are taking a very important examination. You are sitting in front of the papers in the examination hall. You find the exam is so difficult that you can not answer. The time is running. You are desperate and can not do anything. Then you may say, "Tasukete! (Help me!)". To whom you are begging for help. Is it not the evidence that we can not ignore the some unknown but super existence?

In England, I met many students from Arabic countries. This was the first time I saw Arabs. Before I travel to England, I read a book written about economic travel in Europe. One phrase drew my attention. It says, "when you meet Arabs, consider them all as thieves!" Therefore when I met them in England, I was so excited and saw them with great interest. Those Arabs in my language class were not religious at all but when we sometimes discussed about religion in the class I realized their great concern, understanding and specially love and pride against their religion, though they do not practice it well. Also I was surprised when almost all of them were fasting during Ramadan. I was very interested in the people who are different from Europeans, Asians or any other people, with very unique and special rhythm. I was interested in Arabic countries, the people, the life and the culture, etc.

When I went back to Japan I had plenty of time. I borrowed books about Arab from libraries every day and I read and read and read. The more I read the books, the more I realized that there is something which is common in all Arab countries, the common way of thinking which is Islam. Consequently I started to read about Islam. It was simple and logical but never against human conscience. I visited Islamic Center and collected more information. After understanding and accepting it I could not reach my hand to alcohol or pork because Allah kindly forbid them for the sake of our betterment. After that I started to pray by myself.

It did not take time until I embraced Islam.

I became a Muslim through books, not through some mysterious experience. Islam is simple and easy to understand. I hope more people can experience Islam and be guided by Allah.

Sister Rukaiya is a Japanase language teacher