Brian stood sighing heavily. He ran his hands through his hair, speaking softly while looking at his shoes.
"I can’t believe this is happening." He turned suddenly and followed Howie out. "Wait, D... please stop and look at me."
Howie slowly came to a halt, yet never turning to face him. His head dropped, soft waves of hair falling around his face.
"You never hurt me. I was wrong. All this could’ve been prevented had I spoke up sooner. I do love you. It was just, well, at first... I was angry. I was angry that I had feelings for you. I was angry because I knew AJ would pick Nick over me. I was angry that I had let things get so out of hand. Please Howie, look at me. Say something for God’s sake." Brian stammered.
The three of them sat unmoving, all afraid to be the first to break the deafening silence. Minutes ticked by where it felt like time was slowly torturing them. Kevin was the first to shift, somewhat relieving the tension.
"I need to call Kris. You guys wanna give me sec.?" He never looked at them the entire time he spoke. He was afraid they’d see the guilt and regret in his eyes.
AJ and Nick both nodded simultaneously. They stood and filed out into the hallway, confronted with a nervous and babbling Brian. Nick quickly grabbed AJ’s hand and drug him with him into the nearest room, trying not to alert Brian. Softly he shut the door behind him and slowly the lock clicked beneath his fingers. Lowering his eyes, Nick spoke slowly, trying not to stutter.
"Please don’t hate me."
AJ just stared straight ahead as Nick spoke. It annoyed him, the sound of his voice.
"AJ…I was so fucken mad, I couldn’t see straight. It hurt to look at you, to be around you. I mean, how fucken selfish of you to, to…..to say something like you did. I felt so used. I was just trying to get back at you. It didn’t mean a damn thing." Nick said.
"You succeeded Nick. You fucken did it. I felt used. Are you happy now?" AJ’s tone suddenly rose, causing Nick to flinch. "ARE YOU FUCKING HAPPY NOW?" He stood abruptly, looking for something to hit. His hand found an unsuspecting lamp and he easily flung it through the air, sending it smashing against the opposite wall.
"Please AJ. I love you. I always did. It just got so out of hand." Nick pleaded.
"No you don’t." AJ said quietly.
Nick suddenly looked up at AJ. "J, I know what know. I love you. Plain and simple."
"But it’s not plain and simple Nick. It’s so far from being plain and simple... that it’s just... it’s not like that. We can never happen. Not for keeps." AJ paced back and forth, determined to convince himself of something.
"Stop pacing, you know that makes me nervous. Matter of fact, pace yourself right over here." Nick said, curling a finger seductively at AJ. AJ could never resist Nick’s goofy grin and he found himself standing helplessly in front of him. Nick took AJ’s face in his hands, the short stubble of his goatee tickling his fingers. "I love you, you tattooed freak. Deal with it and move on."
"Say it again." AJ whispered.
"I love you." Nick smiled. Pulling AJ’s face to him, they met, lip to lip. Their tongues touched and entwined, making each other’s head spin.
"Hey baby." Kevin purred into the phone. "Well, I had a really weird night and I needed to hear your angelic voice. Soothes the soul I guess."
Kevin snuggled the phone to his face, trying to imagine his wife's soft skin there instead.
"Well, I can’t really get into it over the phone. You deserve to be here when I tell you. Kris... no, Kris, everything is fine. Don’t worry about it hun. We’ll discuss it when we meet up in Dallas."
He sighed, realizing the task he had set before him. It was going to be difficult but he knew it was for the best. He loved her more than he imagined he could love anyone at all. At times, it hurt his heart so much that the only cure was to do something momentarily satisfying. Like making love to another person.
"I love you too Kris." He hung up the phone and scooted under the covers that were messily strung about the bed. It would be okay. He could feel it in his aching heart.
Brian and Howie had haphazardly tossed clothes everywhere. Bathed in moonlight and glistening sweat, the two lovers entwined legs and arms, never feeling quite close enough. Howie’s soft lips trailed kisses all over Brian’s face. Gently they landed upon his eyes, his perfect cheekbones, his sculpted chin. Brian felt as if his body was floating. Minute after minute was spent exploring and touching, feeling and experiencing. It was like no other love he had felt before. Hours pressed on and their heaving bodies slipped against each other, caving in under orgasm after orgasm. The night was endless and time had stopped. If only for a night, everything was as it should be.
AJ thrust angrily into Nick over and over again. Nick’s trembling frame was being pushed ever so slowly into the mattress, his body being ravished beyond comprehension. He enjoyed every minute of it, the raw animal lust that had taken hostage AJ’s body. Nick’s whimpers eventually formed words upon his tongue that eventually made it out of his mouth. It was AJ’s name, over and over, repetition never sounded so good.
He pounded away at Nick, never letting up until he was sure they would both come together. Reaching under Nick, AJ gave him a few quick strokes, feeling him explode all over his hand and the twisted sheets beneath them. A couple more thrusts and AJ found his release also, collapsing atop of Nick. His fingers gently stoked his lover’s back as he slid off and settled beside him.
"You really do love me, don’t you?" AJ asked.
Nick said nothing. Scooping up AJ’s hand he entwined their fingers.
AJ leaned forward and kissed Nick gently upon the forehead. "I love you too." He inhaled him, and everything around him.
Everything was going to be perfect. In fact, it already was.
The End