As I dream of laying in the arms of an Angel, (October 3rd, 2002)

I start to close my eyes,

Images fill my head.

As I look at them,

At first they confused me,

I was not sure what they was,

They become clearer as the moment pass.

The longer I looked at them,

The more I see,

Someone standing in front of me.

Someone with a face so gorgious that they put everyone else to shame,

Someone with a smile so wonderful it brightedn any dark day,

Someone with eyes so full of meaning they could fill a pond,

Someone with lips so soft that water flows perfect over them,

Someone with a voice so soft tha only the birds can hear it,

Someone with a body so perfect its a wonder if he is real.

The closer I looked at him,

I started to realize who he is,

I know this man,

I love this man.

As I stared at this perfect figure before me,

I called out his name,

David.

But I got no answer in return.

The smile leaves my face,

& my eyes fill with tears once again.

As they start to roll down my cheek,

I feel a gentle touch on my hand,

I look up & through tearful eyes,

I see the man I was ment to be with for life.

I look deep into his eyes,

& whispered

it is David, My One True Love.

& then everything was gone as quickly as it appeared,

& the smile that once was there was back,

As I dream of laying in the arms of an Angel.

I open my eyes,

To see the morning dawn,

& to feel the tears that have watered my pillow.

To roll over & look next to me in bed,

There laying on the pillow next to me...

Was the perfect figure from my dream.

Without you (October 3rd, 2003)

Without you,

There is no reason to wake up to the morning light.

There is no reason to lay down to dream at night.

There is no reason to wish on a star.

Without you,

There is no reason to take the next step of the day.

There is no reason to take that next breathe of life.

There is no reason to take a look at the world.

Without you,

There is no reason to walk in the park.

There is no reason to feel the gentle breeze blowing through the trees.

There is no reason to listen to the birds sing their pretty song.

Without you,

There is no reason to believe in love.

There is no reason to care any more.

There is no reason to go on through life.

Without you,

There is no reason for life without you in it.

As I lay in bed, (October 5th, 2002)

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but feel alone,

for all I want is you near.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to hold a pillow tight,

for all I want to do is hold you close.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but wish upon a star,

for all I wish is to see a sparkle in your eyes.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but wonder how you are doing,

for all I need is you.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to cry myself to sleep,

for all my tears are happy ones because of you.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to pretend you are here,

For all I want if you next to me.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to see your sweet face

For all my dreams are of you.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but feel your gentle touch,

for with each touch my heart skips a beat.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to taste your sweet lips,

For every kiss you give steals my breathe away.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to miss you,

For all I desire is your sweet smile.

As I lay in bed,

I can not help but to love you,

For my heart & soul belongs to you.

I Love You!! (October 5th, 2002)

As the day comes to an end,

& the moon shines bright in the sky,

& the stars sparkle like saphires,

& the cool evening air flows through my hair.

I take a look around,

& i notice how calm & peacefull everything looks,

It all looks so perfect from my window.

As I sit down in my bed,

& light my candle on my dresser,

I notice something.

A feeling that was never there before,

As I glance over at the perfect sleeping man.

All I can do is smile,

& I notice the feeling that has grown inside me for him.

As a tear rolls down my cheek,

I realize what this feeling is,

As I stare at this perfect man laying next to me.

I run my finger down his cheek,

& whisper I love you,

& blow out the candle.

Window (October 5th, 2002)

As I sti here

staring out the window,

my eyes start to shut

& my mind wills with images from the day,

As I sit here & remember all of what has happened,

I feel as id I'm forgetting something.

But what I know not.

In the back of my mind,

I hear the birds sing.

& on my skin,

I feel the cool breeze of the open air.

As I slowly open my eyes

I look out the window.

As I sit there staring

Something catches my attention.

then I remember what I forgot,

but yet I really did not forget.

for the reason I felt I forget it

Is because it never happened.

But I want it to happen.

For what I want to happen,

Is you in my life.

For this may never happen,

But I will always have you in my dreams.

& in them always to hold & to love.

Boundries (October 5th, 2002)

For I should have known my boundries,

But yet I followed my heart,

I let my heart take over.

& I lost controll.

All I wanted was for you to know.

But I tried to hard,

& did wrong,

For I follwed my heeart

& I hurt you...

I did the one thing,

I never wanted to do,

& now I can't take it back.

If I had listen to myself,

I would have learned my boundries.

But love did me wrong,

& I did something wrong.

For I asked to much,

When I should have not.

I should have teken what you had given me,

I'm eternally greatful that I was given the chance.

I'll always count myself lucky.

But I did wrong,

By not knowing my boundries.

I crossed a line,

That was there,

But I did not see it.

I never ment to hurt you,

For all I wanted was you to know.

But I crossed that line,

& didn't know where the boundries was.

I should have known,

Not to follow my hearts command,

But I sat & let it take controll,

My heart didn't know it's boundries.

But my mind did,

Next time I will not lose control.

For this I know my boundry

& I knew where the line is.

As I sit here, (October 5th, 2002)

As I sit here,

I feel something lost,

but it can not be gained back.

I think to myself,

how come I do something like that.

I realize where I went wrong,

I showed to much, to soon.

I know you can never love me back,

But accept the fact that I love You.

I know there will never be a chance,

But yet my heart still hold a small hope.

I realize where I went wrong,

I wanted you to know but you didn't.

I know where I did when you gave me the chance to be with you,

I should have taken that, but instead I asked for more.

I know what I did to you,

I know what you said.

The pain sits in my heart,

From what I did.

The tears of sorriness rolls down my cheek,

For I asked to be loved,when I knew you could not.

I asked for more than I should have,

& you did what you thought was best.

I'm sorry for what I have done,

I never ment to hurt you.

For all I wanted was you to know,

But I asked for more.

I asked to be given the chance,

When I knew I would never get it.

I pushed & tried to hard,

& now I have pushed you away.

For the love I hold for you,

Should have been kept in a bottle.

But I showed them all,

& now I have done wrong.

For I never wanted to hurt you,

For I never wanted you to feel pressured

For I listened to my heart,

& lost it all.

I lost something,

That can never be gained back.

For I tried to hard,

& lost my chance.

I know it will never be there,

But I still hold a hope.

For all I did was love you,

For all I did was follow my heart.

For all I did was want you to know,

But in doing so, I asked for the one thing I knew was never going to be there.

I am eternally greatful for the chance you have given me,

& I'm sorry I aksed for more.

I know I shouldn't have,

& for that I'm sorry.

My Mistake, (October 5th, 2002)

My Mistake,

I did not mean to do it,

If I had listen to myself,

Then things wouldn't be the way they are,

I asked for to much,

& showed to much,

I felt to much,

& I put it all on you.

I should have waited,

I did as it wanted,

& I showed it all.

Now I see my mistake,

If I had it all under controll,

You wouldn't have said it all.

Now I have pushed you away,

I never ment to do that,

For all I did was follow my heart.

I was always told,

That your heart will never stear you wrong,

For I shouldn't have listen to them,

For then I would have not made the mistake.

For all I did was love you,

For I wanted was you to know.

But I followed my heart,

& I showed to much,

& I pushed you away,

& now I will never have you,

The way I want you.

My Poems.