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Daddy's Loves by © kiowadogsoldier "Little Bear!??" Now where'n the hell did that boy get off to? "Did you call me ,Daddy?" He looks up at me, from behind the pickup, with his big ol' brown eyes. His mother's eyes, thank the Great Spirit! What a sight! A four year old in beat up cowboy boots, three sizes too big, muddy jeans and T shirt with my favorite, silverbelly, go to town, Resistol pulled down over his ears. "Where've you been and what ARE YOU DOIN" WITH MY GOOD HAT ON?" "Been playin' cowboys and Injuns with the dog". Little joker is gettin' awful good at sidestepping the real issue. Better not let 'im off the hook. "And which one were you?" "Injun.", nothin' else, no explaination, no nothin'. Awwww, to hell with it! I'd lose anyway. "Get in the truck, boy, we're goin' down to the arena." "You ain't gonna fork that ol' yaller hoss again , are you Daddy? Momma says you're too, old for that kind of stuff!" "Get in the truck, boy", I growl. Too old, HELL! "Yessir". Now I've done gone and hurt his feelin's. "C'mon" I murmur,"I got a suprise fer ya!" There's those sparkles in his eyes again. Warms my old heart to see him happy. It's only a hunnerd yards, down to the barn, but we both enjoy ridin' in the truck, especially when I sit him in my lap and let him steer. We've only taken out a few fencepost and I had them reset and restrung before his Momma knew about it. "Wanna drive?" "Naw. I wanna know what my suprise is!" "Well, I'll show ya in just a couple of minutes". It's cool and familiar inside this old barn and Little Bear quickly discovers some sounds that aren't so familiar. "Daddy,!! Daddy!! There's a bunch of woolies in this here stall!!" "Damned if you ain't right! Where ya figure they come from? Think somebody stole 'em and left 'em here so they wouldn't get caught? Maybe, aliens brought 'em. Hell, boy, maybe they're aliens!" "Awww Daddy, you bought 'em didn't ya?" There's those sparkles again and this time I get a smile to go with 'em. "Yeah. I bought 'em fer you, but you can't tell your Momma that or she'll skin me alive!" There's a couple of seconds of mystifying silence and contemplation, when he asks "What am I gonna do with 'em?" "Ride 'em" "Like you rode bulls?" Now there's some excitement in that little voice. "Yep". "But Daddy they're not big like bulls!" he states so matter of factly and with a little dissappointment. "Nope, but then you ain't big like me either, are ya?" Good reply old man, now let's give him a little time to get hooked. A couple of more seconds pass as he chews on that thought about size. "Awrite, let's turn 'em out and get a good look at 'em, Daddy. You always told me ya' gotta study 'em 'fore ya ride 'em." Little Bear set up the gates, going to the arena and slowly opened the stall door where the sheep were penned. He kept himself back behind the stall door not sure what to expect from these foreign looking creatures. The look on his face was worth a million dollars. He was tryin' so hard to act like an old hand at handling sheep and not show any fear. Figured I'd better give him a hand, I sure didn't want him to be embarrassed in front of his old Dad. That kind thing can leave scars on a boy. "Go ahead, son. Ease into the stall and kinda herd 'em out here into the alley way. I'll help ya get 'em into the arena." Pure relief on his face now. "Thanks, Daddy". Well, sheep ain't the most congenial critters in the world, but, we finally herded 'em all down into the arena. It probably wouldn't have been so difficult but that damned dog showed up to help. Now, I'm not too, sure if that Border Collie was dumb as a rock, that day, or if'n me and Little Bear just weren't smart enough to listen to what he was tryin' to get us do. All I know is that it's a good thing that I didn't have a gun with me or that dog and them sheep would'a all been lookin' for the Spirit Horse to come get 'em. "Daddy?" "Yeah, son?" "You OK?" "Yeah, I'm awright, but I'd like ta kill that dog of yours right about now!" "Awwww Daddy, he was just tryin' to help". Out of the mouths of babes! I couldn't help it, I just had to laugh out loud. "Awright, I won't kill 'im , today, but you might want to let him work these sheep, one day, to see if he knows what he's 'posed to do. OK?" Big ol' Texas grin and them sparkles in his eyes. Boy's smarter than he has a right to be at four years old. Well, there's a ritual to be performed here and we're burnin' daylight. "Son?" "Yessir?" "How's about you go in the tack room and bring me that old green canvas bag on the second shelf, will ya? I'm gonna drag up a bucket to set on, cause there's a couple of things that we gotta do before you try them woolies, out there in the arena." "OK, Daddy" I hear a thump and a lot of muffled cussin' comin' from the tack room. Where in the world did that boy learn them words at? Must a been from his two teenaged sisters. "HEY ! ! !" "Yessir?" "Is that you cussin'?" He pokes his head out of the tackroom door. He's lookin' awfull hard at that floor. Is he gonna tell me the truth or is he gonna take the other option? "I'm sorry, Daddy, but this big ol' bag is ,too, heavy! And I'm MAD!" Dog gone it! Forgot that my bronc saddle was in the bottom of that bag. Better smooth this situation over, we'll deal with the cussin' later. "Naw, Naw! It's OK son. Daddy wasn't thinkin'. My old bronc saddle's in the bottom and I forgot to tell ya about it." "That's OK Daddy, but will yo help me get it out there?" "Shore. Tell ya what. I'll get this old heavy bag and you drag up that other water bucket over there. You're gonna need somethin' to sit on." Memories flood over me as I open up my gear bag. The smells, the fear, the crowds, the sounds. All just as vivid as if the happened yesterday. I wonder if Bear will be able to hear 'em when he's my age? I sure hope so. Better wipe my eyes. Don't want to be embarrassed in front of my son. "Daddy?", he whispered. "Yes, son?" "It's OK Daddy. Momma told me that you cry, ever time you get in that bag. She said that that's your real medicine bundle and that I'm sposed to be real 'spectful when you open it for me." She knew. She knew all along. The only Red in her is the color of her blood and she still knew. What this stuff means to me, it's power and that today would eventually come. Today when I start to pass my heritage,my medicine and one of my loves, to my son. "Awww, your Momma's just full of beans, boy. I just got somethin' in my eye. Probably a piece of dust. Now then. Stand up there on that bucket and let's see what we got in here." "Wow! ! What are those, Daddy?" "They're chaps, boy. They protect your legs when you're buckin' rough stock." "They don't look nothin' like the chaps you wear around here!" "No, no they don't. These are alot flashier, ain't they? Well, let's see, now. Hmmm. Son, I think that they're way too big for ya, BUT. I think we can do a little work on 'em and do a little cuttin' and they'll be just right." An hour later and alot of buckskin is layin' on the floor around the bottom of that bucket. Scissors here, awls and sinew there and my boy. Standin' on that bucket just as proud as a peacock in his new chaps. "Let me help you down. That fringe ain't on them chaps fer walkin' purposes." "Why is it there, Daddy?" "It gives the wings, these parts here, better action. The beads in the fringe are for our relations...people, animals, spirits. You know, I've told you stories about our relations." "We are all related to everything under WAKAN TANKA, Daddy. I know." "That's a pretty good way of puttin' it, son. Every time you look at these chaps, touch the beads, and remember that." "I will Daddy." "AND,,,YOU BOYS,,,better remember to clean up this mess that...?" Busted. Didn't even hear her walk in. "Oh, my God! J.T., he looks just like you did...? Your bull ridin' chaps!..Are you sure..? Oh Bear! Come and give Momma a hug. You look so adorable!" "Ain't no dorable! I'm gonna be a bull rider! Just like my Daddy!" So there you have it. The one time that Daddy's Loves were all in the same place, at the same time, howlin' at the top of their lungs in a beautiful song. The way it was..maybe not. The way it will be..who knows. The way it should be..ABSOLUTELY! Happy Trails, Dogsoldier