Hector It was in many ways beyond mortal description. Therefore, I invoke the Muses!

Sweet Mountain Goddess, sing through me,
Your trip-tongued soldier slave
This tale of vast stupidity
Of Paris, fool and knave.

Paris: Hey... wait a second...

Chorus: We heed fierce Hector’s clumsy call
And fly swift to his aid;
O Sisters, let’s sing softly all
To Soldier’s lovely maid.

Paris: Wait! What is this? She’s MY lovely maid! Aren’t you?

Helen: Of course I am, Paris. Shh, now. Listen to the nice Immortals.

Two Chorus members in white masks step forward to represent (in stylistic pantomime) the duel between the two heros.

The Duel

Chorus:
The battlefield of Troy was hot
The sun burned red with death
And Menelaus bravely sought
Through corpses void of breath
The son of Priam, firebrand
Dear Aphrodite’s ward
Grim and bleak he held in hand
His silver-studded sword.
To find
His man
He pined
He ran

Paris of the fair face waited
Then strode boldly forth
Haloed glory, bright breath baited
Quick as wind of North
He called to Menelaus,
Crying, "Soldier, here I am!
The Gods in Heaven favour us
So fight me if you can!"
He beamed
He smiled
Agleam
With guile

Menelaus raised his hands
To Zeus who thunders high
And soft invoked his native land
In plaintive, quiet sigh:
"Spartan Zeus, look down and see
The crime you hate the most:
Reprove the sin of jealousy,
Of cuckolding one’s host!"

The duel
Began
To save one’s wife from strangers’ hands
To rid one’s home of foreign clans
The gleam
The sword
The jeering hoard
On high
The Gods
Watched from
The sky
And tore asunder Soldier’s blade.

"O Zeus!" cried he, "I’ve done no wrong!
Why punish, why be cruel?"
His hesitation wasn’t long
And soon his heart was cooled
He took
Prince Paris
By his crest
He shook
Prince Paris
Fiercely lest
He forfeit all

The pantomime Menelaus and Paris "fight," their whirls taking them closer and closer to the wings until they exit and are replaced with the actual Menelaus and Paris. The two resume shadow-fighting. It looks as though Paris will be killed when Helen cries out--

Helen: Stop!

It is not Paris but Menelaus who looks up and sees her. He freezes when he does. Silence. Then,

Chorus:
The sudden thought of Helen freezes
Menelaus where he stands
Aphrodite’s prince now eases
Past and slips through Soldier’s hands.
He ran
And still
The soldier stands.