Breseis walks along the stage. Enter Odysseus.
Odysseus: Why, felicitations, blushing damsel—you look splendidly tonight!
Breseis: Buzz off.
Odysseus: Now, now. That's no way for a lady to talk!
Breseis: What if I'm not a lady?
Odysseus: If you're a gentleman, I must be submitting to decadent philosophies of late, because I really don't care!
Breseis: Don't be stupid. I'm a girl.
Odysseus: I would have thought you a serviceman from the way you speak.
Breseis: Yeah, well, I'm not a noble or anything, okay?
Odysseus: What's your name?
Breseis: Breseis.
Odysseus: I wonder how you came to be among us Achaians.
Breseis: You really want to know?
Odysseus: It's my duty as a scientist and observer of humanity to uncover as much information as possible.
Breseis: Your Achaian soldiers raped me. I was taken from my family, torn from my mother's arms, you know the story. I'm Achilles' slave girl now. He's not married, and I'm expected to take her place. Oh, wait. Now I'm Agamemnon's slave. I'm not a surrogate wife anymore. I just do all his dirty work, clean his tents, and sit doing bloody knitting all day. No, check that. I'm a harlot again. Achilles got me back.
Odysseus: That's... that's a distressing thought...
Breseis: What, you thought us slaves belonged to a charity group or something? Yeah, it's called "Bed-Warmers for the Criminally Insane and Mentally Obtuse."