Scene Four

The stage is dark except for a small pool of dim light (through a brown gel) in the centre, giving the impression of a small enclosed space. This is inside the Trojan Horse. Inside are the Greek heros mentioned before—none of them stand up straight, as it's rather cramped.

Agamemnon: Odysseus.

Odysseus: I know! I miscalculated. By a slip of my stylus I scaled this thing down by 25.

Ajax: It's more like a little donkey.

Antilochus: Yeah. The Trojan A—-

Odysseus: Don't say it! So I made an error. I still did a far better job than any of you could have done.

There's a gloomy silence.

Ajax: Menelaus, I'm frightened.

Menealus: Hush. We have to sit still for a few more hours, and then we can go outside.

Diomedes: How long have we been in here?

Menealus: Not more than a hundred and twenty minutes

Antilochus: It feels more like two hours to me.

Ajax: It feels like forever to me.

Menealus: It will be over soon.

Agamemnon: Can you keep it down? We don't want to be discovered!

Another hush.

Menealus: Can you hear that?

Agamemnon: They're certainly having a lot of fun out there.

Odysseus: In all probability, imbibing alcoholic beverages, too.

Menealus: We can relax a little, then. Come on, all of you! Cheer up a bit. Don't look so glum.

Ajax: Why shouldn't I?

Menealus: Well, Odysseus here is so sorry for making things difficult that he's going to sing a song for us.

Antilochus: Dear Poseidon. Since when can engineers sing?

Odysseus: A sweeping generalization! (Shooting Menelaus a nasty glance) Very well! But if I have to sing a merry ballad, I'm at least going to make it educational.

Menealus: Odysseus... make it appropriate.

Odysseus: Nothing could be more so!


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