jealousy5

xaveria says: such as... that person is part of a project at work.. and you hear that someone else got all the credit...

Lavicka says: yes, there are rebecca.. i was hoping to maybe get some of them here :) LOL

xaveria says: would you be jealous on his/her behalf...

Rebecca says: I play electric bass... and spent some quality time in bands... you get to do a lot of people watching in bands.

Crimson says: Ok... but can we talk about ... some people DO have to deal with it...

Rebecca says: But I don't think jealous people last or survive as easily in ds relationsips.

xaveria nods.. husband was in a band for years and years... i would have gone crazy if i was jealous

xaveria says: especially since i saw many of the married musicians fooling around

Lavicka asks: so how do you NOT be jealous?

Crimson says: I've heard a little voice here say it's not always that easy

Aspinara says to Lavicka: With great difficulty. :)

Crimson says: I don't like jealousy, but some people do have to deal with it

Prophet says: I think it starts with you internally.. if you are secure then you don't have to be jealous

Lavicka asks: what do we say to those people we deal with that just cant get past their jealousy issues... remember, these are people we want to have a healthy relationship with. we obviously have some feeling for them or we wouldn't be in a relationship with them in the first place, right?

Crimson says: I agree it's a matter of feeling secure or not

Rebecca says: Every bar fight I've seen started with jealousy.

Lavicka says: definitely... security in your own being is a must if youre going to trust someone else

Crimson says: And security in the relationship

mouse says: Do our best to point out to them that we care about them and that while they're feeling jealous, they are in a stable and secure relationship.

xaveria says: brb

Prophet asks: every one of them? hmmm...

Crimson says: hehe

Lavicka asks: but how do we handle it if the OTHER person isnt secure enough with themselves to let go of their jealousy issues?

mouse says: patience.. lots and lots of patience.

Rebecca asks: Dump them isn't the answer you are looking for, is it?

Rebecca giggles.

Crimson says: Let me know when you get an answer to that one lav

Lavicka asks: i know people here who have 2 spouses... what makes them different and able to deal with that without being jealous when others cant?

Lavicka says: well, i would assume it wouldnt be that easy to dump someone you love, rebecca :)

Rebecca can be pretty shallow. :)

Lavicka grins

mouse says: It truthfully depends on the relationship.

Lavicka asks: do you think theres some internal knowledge that makes one person jealous and another not?

Crimson says: It's a LOT of societal messages...

Lavicka asks: ok.. so society is to blame for jealous reactions?