LAURA AND THE GOD SQUAD--
TO ECUADOR AND BEYOND!!!
from Richard:
(5/22/00 Re: A Big Burrito and Jesus and Me)
Dear Wonder Bi Lingual Christian Woman graduate of DeVry.
I was most touched by your last testiment to GOD and the Rocking Yahweh a.k.a. Jesus almighty power ranger bible crime fighter. Woo hoo, you touched me RAD and 3/4! I was way skeptical of your last letter and made a hasty rebuttle, denying myself the TRUE and AWESOME wonderment of our Father. Please wonder monkey girl, find it in your christian core of intense praise to forgive my failure to see the TRUTH in your mission.
I know the awsome X-tian Folklore Group you speak of. I witnessed the Holy power that was delivered through their fellowship and storytelling. My numero UNO favorite tale is how Jesus and his disciples were merely a band of homosexuals. Rock OUT halelujah...gay PRIDE! I just hope next time christ brings you the opportunity to face the bull, a.k.a. el torro diablo, that you find it in your lesbo self to hop right down and meet the challenge. You have to sister!, this will show GOD how you as well, can meet his tests like JOB. What an incredible accomplishment of biblical proportions that would be. I will pray for you so that this will be brought before you again! AMEN!
I too in my travels have come across the amazing power of Rosa Florina. She is a SAINT and to have carried her bundle of sticks will grant you immediate access to the kingdom of glory above. When I met Rosa, she was in the market trying to buy a chicken head for her family's dinner. She had no money, and had already sold all of her fingers. She only had thumbs left, and without them she would not be able to carry her sticks. So in the name of Christian brotherhood, I chopped off my own finger in order that she would be able to use it in trade for a chicken head to feed her family. It hurt like a mo fo, but I remembered my big brother JC and how he endured the pain of the cross and I was healed. But I did notice Rosa Florina stole my wallet and my passport. I had to push her fingerless 7 year old ass down a big hill and she got her eye poked out on one of her sticks. I asked to be forgiven and it was done. Isn't God's power amazing! you can do anything you want and then just ask to be forgiven and the Sacred SLATE comes clean! AMEN.
Oh dear sister of the faith...beware of the monkey! That aint no ape, that's Rosa Florina's little brother Paulo San Pepe. He is a trickster. and dirty too. You think he is swimming in your sea of hair, like Mary Magdeline's who used it to wash our holy brother's feet, but that monkey is just getting off. He has a neck fetish and ooooh lord if he orgasmics on you, you don't even know the power of his disease. Filthy monkey, heaven above, I pray you have found any tangles and matts in your hair.
Well divinely sister...I must go...I look forward to your next letter.
P.S. I know you must be exhausted from mentally sorting out English from Spanish, but I thought you would like to know that "AND" is still spelled 'and" and not ADN! Rock me AMADEUS!
AMen
Brother Dickie Pie