Improv2000 #3
The Improv Poem
by Leslie
September 17, 2000
DISCLAIMER: Mulder and Scully etc etc don't belong to me. Neither
does Foreigner. If they did, I'd be somewhere else, driving a much
nicer vehicle, living in a much nicer house and wearing much nicer
clothes.
Author's notes at the end
Improv Poem
Scully was looking real down and so Mulder
Decided he needed to do more than hold her
And tell her he loved her. Yes, you read that right -
Our Mulder is back! He came home one night
Right out of the blue. The aliens brought him.
It seemed that he wasn’t as smart as they’d thought him
‘Cos without his cell phone his intellect dropped
Which meant that, of course, all experiments flopped.
His bizarre behaviour became even stranger.
He began to sleep-walk, becoming a danger
Not just to himself but every ship function.
And so, in the end, they felt no compunction
In sending him home to ensure their survival!
And Scully, of course, was stoked by his arrival
And straight away told him he’d soon be a dad
And Mulder decided the news weren’t half bad
And plied his sweet Scully with Mallomars daily
Which she ate with appetite hearty and haily!!!
And the new life within her it prospered and grew
And Scully was happy and Mulder was, too.
But now, for some reason, his Scully looked sad
He didn’t know why but he knew that he had
To cheer her in someway and make her feel better
And so he sat down and wrote her a letter
Inviting her over for dinner that night.
She arrived right on time, a beautiful sight
All decked out in blue in maternity style
And he drew her towards him and hugged her awhile
And then sat her down on his couch with a drink
Hazelnut crème coffee, her favourite, I think,
(At least for this poem). Then sat down beside her
And gave her three presents. And Scully did slide her
Hand onto his knee and gave him a smile
And then they did kiss…and they kissed for a while.
Then Mulder pulled back and said, “Open them up.”
The first held a pretty blue measuring cup
And also a few more, an entire set.
And Mulder said, “These are so that I can let
You sleep in each morning when I’m staying over
I’ll make pancakes and then we can roll in the clover!”
But Scully said sadly. “You can’t want me like this.”
“Oh, I do!” Mulder stated and gave her a kiss
“And I’ll prove it to you, but first open the rest.”
The second gift was a doll, beautifully dressed
In a white uniform. “Oh, it’s Jean Luc Picard,”
Scully squealed with delight and hugged Mulder hard.
“It’s from 'Insurrection'.” “Yes, how did you know?”
“Just a hunch,” he replied. “I know you love that show.
Now open the third one, it’s not really right,
But I searched everywhere and try as I might
I just could not find what I wanted,” he said.
And Scully the present of wrapping she shed.
“Oh Mulder, a miniature Queequeg, how sweet.”
“I wanted a real one but my poor feet
Got tired from searching and all that I found
Was a poor hairless creature at the city pound
Pomeranians, it seems, are much in demand.”
And Scully was touched and reached out her hand
“Oh, Mulder, the thought was there, thank you so much.
But I like this toy better. You really are such
A darling to get all these presents for me.”
“Oh Scully, I hate to see you unhappy.
Do you feel better now? Have I cheered you at all?”
“Oh Mulder, I feel like a big, fat beach ball!”
How can you want me?” “I do,” Mulder said.
“Come with now, let me take you to bed
And I’ll show you how much. Please, Scully,” he pleaded
When it seemed as if his words were going unheeded.
But then Scully nodded, though reluctantly,
And Mulder led her to his bedroom to see
That he had put candles all over the room.
She sat on the bed and watched Mulder zoom
Around the room quickly lighting each one
Which were scented, she noted, then when he was done,
He turned on soft music and started to dance
Removing his clothes in ways meant to entrance.
One piece at a time, in rhythmic seduction
Until he was naked…a perfect construction!
And Scully was hooked and could not move her eyes
From his marvelous weapon that increased in size
As he moved towards her and reached for her hand
And they danced together to the tune of the band.
Then Mulder undressed her and Scully felt shy
But Mulder, for once, was a sensitive guy
And did it real slowly and reverently
And Scully could tell that he loved her and she
Got into the moment and all was just right
And so they made love for the rest of the night.
The things I had to use:
- a cup of hazelnut creme coffee
- a Pomeranian (a'la Queequeg) but with absolutely no
fur whatsoever
- Mulder without a cell phone
- Mulder dances nekkid
- A Captain Jean-Luc Picard "Insurrection"
doll.
(That's NOT an action figure -- it's a
Barbie-sized doll with a white uniform that can be removed. Oh, and
it looks *just like* Patrick Stewart too)
- someone walking in their sleep
- a set of measuring cups
Home
|