"It’s A Little Toy Car" (reviewed by AX)

When I was growing up, there was this crazy motherfucking kid in my neigborhood that’d do ANYTHING you asked him to. He loved attention. He’d fall off his bike in the middle of the street, he’d jump from the roof of your house, and he’d climb a tree and take a shit when he reached the top. Watching a human turd fall like that was one of the most hilarious things I’ve ever witnessed, and I don’t mind admitting I laughed till I thought I was gonna shit myself. We all did.

As adults, we know that it’s wrong to laugh when we see someone slam into a wall. We know we shouldn’t chuckle when we see an old man lose control of his motorized wheelchair. And please, whatever you do, don’t laugh when someone farts.

MTV’s show JACKASS, a cross between Evel Knievel and America’s Funniest Home Videos, allows us the freedom to laugh our collective asses off at stuff like this without feeling guilty about it. No wonder, then, that it’s a hugely popular show. However, what do you do when seeing a bunch of crazy grown men hurt themselves week after week performing idiotic stunts gets old? You up the ante, my friends. You make a feature-length film version of the show, slap on an R rating, and let ‘er fucking rip. And oh boy do they.

First off, most of the footage in JACKASS: THE MOVIE seems to have been filmed in Japan. I think they probably did this because most people in the U.S. are now wise to who the people in JACKASS are, and would be wise to what was happening if these guys tried to pull a lot of these pranks on our streets. Hell, they’d never get a chance to shoot bottle rockets out of their assholes because they’d get mobbed for autographs here.

But that’s not all they do in the movie, my friend. What happens in the more private settings is nuts, some of which left me hurting from laughter AND nauseated all at once. Going into detail about what they do would only ruin the experience, suffice to say they go way beyond anything Tom Green has done. They’ve entered G.G. Allin and Bob Flanagan territory here, kids. Be advised, you will be seeing quite a lot of male nudity in JACKASS THE MOVIE, as well as just about every body fluid they make. If being up close and personal with vomit, shit, blood, and piss upsets you…you may want to consider going to something else. Me, I thought it was goddamn hilarious.

What I think is even more hilarious, perhaps, is the fact that the big movie critics and publications are going to HAVE to review this movie. And they're either going to want to hang themselves, turn their noses up, or admit that this is some funny shit. We'll see.

Me? Instead of wondering how much further entertainment can go after seeing this, I instead look forward in anticipation for who will step up to the plate next, and what the fuck they’ll do to shock us. I can’t imagine what it might be, but that's part of the fun.

(10.25.02)