10. BLADE 2
|
Guillermo Del Toro revamped (no pun intended) the character without ruining the mythos created by the first
installment, while adding a much needed sense of horror to the whole deal. One look at the vagina-mouthed Reapers, and
you’ll never want to have sex again, for a few minutes.
|
9. DEATH TO SMOOCHY
|
One of the funniest flicks in recent memory, with Robin Williams doing all the shit he wished he
could’ve done in Patch Adams. Worth it just to see him spill hot coffee on his genitals.
|
8. SPIDER-MAN
|
The biggest surprise for me this year. I expected this to tank, but Sam Raimi came through, delivering the
same character I grew up marveling at.
|
7. THE TRANSPORTER
|
No one caught this bad boy, and too fucking sad. Jason Statham kicked some serious ass in
this, the popcorn flick of the year.
|
6. RED DRAGON
|
This one ties with Silence of the Lambs, through and through. Hopkins’ Hannibal character finally
settles into our psyche as the premier psychopath in American pop culture. Oh, and Ed Norton, Phillip Seymour
Hoffman, Harvey Keitel, Emily Watson, and Ralph Fiennes aren’t bad, either.
|
5. THE RING
|
Holy dog shit…. HOW do you improve on the classic Japanese original? Why, you make it even creepier, and
add some cool make-up effects to increase the total terror factor that leads to the classic, stool-loosening “TV
scene”. The bad news? Yes, a sequel’s on the way.
|
4. SIGNS
|
With the exception of a preachy finale, this one ranks as a classic sci-fi film that does away with the usual
conventions that plague the genre. The scene with the Mexican home video footage made me jump like a bitch.
|
3. EQUILIBRIUM
|
With actions scenes that blew the Matrix away, and a decent back story inspired by Huxley and Orwell,
this one was hardly seen, but is destined to become a cult classic. Gun Kata rules.
|
2. GANGS OF NEW YORK
|
Bloody Hell! Guts, gore, dead rabbits, and hatchets, and Daniel Day Lewis make this the best Scorcese
flick since Goodfellas. The grand scope of the production adds a great deal of realism to what ultimately adds up to a
thrilling revenge tale. Brendan Gleason is damn good as well. DiCaprio…well…he’s in it, as is Cameron Diaz…she of the
big head and no ass.
|
1. LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS
|
Once you get past the fact that NO ONE can fully interpret the books in film
form, this epic will come across as a marvel of modern fantasy. Peter Jackson has brought images to the screen that
have never been attempted or conceived in the history of film, and the battle at Helm’s Deep alone is a work of pure,
visceral beauty.
|