I could tell you all about the weekend and how that went. I have more important things to express today. I spent most of the evening feeling very alone. I am not lonely, there is a difference. I am alone. I become very aware of it when I have so much to share and give to someone, and there is no one to receive it. I am not talking about being horney or something like that. I know there are plenty of people out there that are more than willing to be there for my physical needs or to receive attention from me. But to find someone that wants to be there because they are intrested in truely sharing themselves with me, that is the challange. I know I have so much to give and I am willing to give it freely, but I am only willing to give it to someone who is willing to give equally and freely to me in return. Things have to be equal, I have to love him as much as he love me and he has to love me as much as I love him.
June 4,1999
I have not been able to say much because I have been very busy and the Geobuilder was not working properly. But I am here now. There have not been many revelations recently, but I will say this, I am a very lucky person. I have the most wonderful father anyone could ever want. I spoke to my father the other night about my trip to Africa/England and it is all a go. I will be spending two weeks on safari in Africa and then I will have a week in England to see some sights. The best thing about all of this is.... when I am in England I will be with Lee and he will be able to show me the "real" England as he puts it. I am hoping to actually see some of the castles I have been reseaerching. I have a database of castles and I will be able to see which ones are in the area I will be in. With this information I will be able to actually go and see them for myself. I can't wait. The scary thing is, I know that Feb. will be here before I know it.
June 8, 1999
I had a good weekend. I had a dinner party for a few of my friends and it went great. Then a couple of us went out dancing and I did not get home till about 6 am. I have to say that the more I go out with this one friend of mine the more I know what it is I want out of a relationship. He is a very good man. I have a feeling about him, I know that our friendship will probably out last the friendship that introduced us. It sounds so sad to say but I can kind of see it happening. Our common friend is very protective of her friends and will have a hard time adjusting to the fact that we are friends ourselves. I am a little nervious about how we are going to confront her about it. I hope all goes well.
June 11,1999
It has been a very busy week over all. Monday and Tuesday night I did not get home till about midnight. Monday night I went out to dinner and then just talked till about 12. Tuesday I baby-sat for my friend and did not get home till 11:30. Wednesday night I just stayed home, that was so nice. Last night I went out to the movies with my ex-boyfriend, that was enjoyable. I finally saw Star Wars. I am still not exactly sure how I feel about it. Tonight I am going to go out with Eric, at least that was the plan. I am not srue what we are going to be doing but I know I will have a great time no matter what. This weekend looks pretty slow over all. It will be a nice change.
Yesterday at work we went to batting practice for our softball team. Our first game is on Monday, So I am sure that by Tuesday this will be a little more intresting. I am really starting to feel like the pressure to write something every day is getting to me and I am writing more babble than substance. I will have to decide what to do. I forewarn you, changes are ahead.
June 14, 1999
The weekend was not as slow as I at first thought it would be. Friday night I was able to hang out with Eric, that was very enjoyable. Saturday I went to a fitting for a movie that I am going to be an extra in. That was a very intresting experience. I will be on the film set Wednesday all day. It will be very neat to be on the film set and see what it is like. Perhaps I will be doing more extra work if I enjoy doing this work. I am sure that I will have lots to talk about now. The movie is a film by Dream Works, about the band Black Sabbath. I am not srue what it is going to be like, but I am a Fan and will be filming in the San Diego Sports Arena. Sunday I went and had lunch with Eric at his work, that was also enjoyable. I will be writing more about my adventures in the film industry, so stay tuned.
I tried to tell you all about my adventrues in the film industry yesterday, but after I typed it all out, the server did not let me save it. So as you can understand I am a bit frustrated.
OK Tuesday night I got a call saying the call time was 11am. I was very surprised considering I knew it was going to be a 12-14 hour day. This late start means was going to be a late night. My fears were confirmed, I got there at 11 and I did not get to leave till 2:30am. That makes for a very long day. When I got there I checked in, and then went to wardrobe and picked up what I was going to be wearing that day, then they send you off to hair and makeup. I am happy to say that I did not need any hair or makeup added. I am not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing. Does that mean that my normal style is dated? I don't need anyone to answer this, I want to live in my delusion. ahahah So after all that running around we go off to Extra Holding. Can we say Mooo. NO it was not that bad, they had food for us and tables and chairs. Well I am not sure exactly what time it all started but soon they sent for us and we went into the San Diego Sports Arena to start.
Now I need to tell you what the movie is about, so you can understand what it was they needed so many extras for. The movie is not about Black Sabbath like I first thought. The movie is about the live of Cameron Crow, he is the guy asscoiated with, "Fast Times at Richmont High", "Singles", and "Jerry Mc Guyer". Now he is directoring a new film. It is supposed to be a romantic comedy like Jerry Mc Guyer. Well when he was 15 he was sent by Rolling Stone magazine to interview Black Sabbath, but he ended up interviewing the opening act, "Stillwater". Rolling Stone did not know he was only 15 at the time. So all of the extras are for the concert, we are actually Black Sabbath fans and really waiting for them to start.
It is really intresting to see how the are planning on making a sold out show out of ~450 people. They placed us in various places in the arena and then flimed us, later they are going to put it all together and it will look exactly like a sold out show. The neat thing is, technically I will be on the screne roughly 8 times. ahahhaah Talk about bing in more than one place at a time. ahahahahah
Well that was pretty much it for my adevntures. I can tell you this I don't think I am going to quit my day job. It is really hard work. You get bored and tired yet feel like you havent really done anything. I might conisder doing extra work again, but not for a concert scene. I think some other scen may not be as bad. I will never know unless I try. hummmmmmm......
As for my weekend it was pretty uneventful. I did not really do anything, the best thing I did was I went to La Jolla and hanged out with Tammy, her son, and Jae. At the park in La Jolla on Sundays during the summer there are free concerts, this is where we went. It was a very enjoyable and relaxing day, we packed a lunch and some wine and just sat and enjoyed the beautiful sunny day.
June 28, 1999
I know it has been a while since I have said anything. In the past week I have been to the movie set once more. This time we were filming the people going into the Sports Arena getting ready for the concert. It was a lot more fun than the first day I worked.
Things for my trip to Africa are moving along nicely. We pretty much have a date set and are just waiting for the travel company to tell us it is ok. Then we will be sending in our deposit and paying for our flights. I can't wait.
I saw Eric on Thursday last week and we had a wonderful time. Things are moving along nicely. I am seeing him again tonight. The more time I spend with him the more I realize what a great person he is. I am glad that we are friends and I know what that will never change.
June 29, 1999
Yesterday was a very typical work day. After work I saw Eric, we had dinner and then spent the evening talking. I sm so happy I have finally meet someone like him. I have waited a long time and now I know that the patience has payed off. I am in contact with Lee about the flights to and from Africa. It looks like we will be staying an extra night in Nairobi because our first flight left too early, so we are going to be staying the night in Nairobi and leaving the next day. This will give us the oppertunity to see what Nairobi is like. That should be an adventrue in and of its self.
July 13,1999
A lot has happened, but I will have to write about it later. I have been very busy recently. Eric is out of town, and will be back on the 25th. I think that I am going to only write when something great happends. I feel that trying to say something most days is affecting the qulity of what I say. I would rather that I say something worth while a couple times a week vs. crap four times a week. So from now on trust taht my life is good and I am happy. I will let you know all about the exciting things.
I am not going to be seeing Eric in a romantic sense any more. He has decided to persue this other woman from his past. This sucks for mebut I know that I have a friend in him and that is the most important thing. My friend from Peru finally showed up for my birthday. He wants me to fly to Peru for a long weekend and he even said he would pay for it. Hummmm.... I want to go to Peru, but I do not want to have to deal with the assumptions that might be made if I take him up on his offer. So I probably will not go as a result. An ex boyfriend is wanting to court me again. He does seem to have changed a lot, but I will just have to wait and see.
July 27, 1999
The past month has been full of fun and excitement. I have had visitors from two different countries staying with me. For one week a lady from the Chez Republic stayed with me, she was very nice and we got on well. Marketa will be comming back to SD near the first of the year. She will be here for three months at that time and then back home she goes. For the past two weeks I has Kristen who is from Australia stay with me and she and I had a lot of fun together. We did so much and just got into some trouble, not really but if we had it would have been worth it. I really hope she comes back to do her post-doc here because I know that we would have so much fun.
On the male front nothing has changed. Chris (the ex) is still around and is consistant. Eric and I are friends he just got back into town on Sunday and we are going to go out Wednesday. I am not sure how that will go, but I am looking forward to it.
September 3, 1999
I have not been adding to this page much recently because I felt that it was starting to get a bit old. I was not saying anything new and I was not even looking forward to adding to it.
The past month and a half, not a lot has happened. Kristen the girl from Australia stayed with me and she and I has so much fun I was really sad to see her go. I just found out yesterday that she will not be comming back to work here. I was really hoping that she would. Well I guess this will just be another escuse to travel to where ever she ends up so I can visit her.
