|
Step Five: The Final Test Ron’s mind was oddly calm as he waited in Mary’s office. He remembered Draco being dragged away from him, his face knotted in rage as he screamed all manner of insults at Mary and Paul. He sat quietly, wrapped in the velvet blanket from the Final Test room to cover himself. It brushed softly against his skin. The tick of the clock echoed in the room marking off the seconds of an eternity between the moment he was locked into the room and the moment when Mary would come back, and the rest of his life would be decided by a sadistic, bitter, burned-out old woman in a hot pink robe. The image of Draco’s eyes came back to him then. His tender, pale eyes, so vulnerable as he looked back at him the night of their first kiss. "How?" Draco asked in a high, fearful voice. "How what?" "How can you… how can it be me?" He’d been so confused, so alone. He wondered if Draco was scared now. If he was fighting back. What kind of mental torture that harpy was enacting upon him. Ron’s mind slowly began to form around these questions, envisioning exactly what Mary could do to Draco’s life. He didn’t have any friends to fall back on. Ron started as the door opened suddenly and Mary entered, watching him severely. His eyes followed her from the door to her chair. "It’s my fault." Ron blurted out. "I reckon he just wasn’t thinking clearly when I kissed him and just went along with it. I didn’t mean to make him do something he didn’t want to, but I think I did anyway. You’ve got to give him another chance." "Ron?" He heard his mother’s voice and fixed his mouth in a crooked grimace. She came around with his father, both looking as if they’d just flooed in the middle of the night. "Draco told us that he’d initiated the… liaison." Mary said with thinly veiled disgust. "Well…" Ron looked at his parents sheepishly. His resolved to protect Draco was rapidly fading under the threat of disownment. His parents both looked so disappointed. "He did kiss me first, but-" "Then he was the aggressor." Mary spat. "No!" He flushed and looked away. "He was really upset… and I told him that I liked him, you know… I think that’s why he did that." "Just because he was tempted didn’t give Malfoy the right to take advantage of you." His father said angrily. "I should have known something like this would happen with a Malfoy hanging about!" Molly said, glaring accusingly at Mary. "Why don’t you keep a better hold on these children, Madam Cummings? You’re going to make them worse!" "Mrs. Weasley, Ron has to be responsible for himself! By all rights, I should have him expelled from this school along with Draco. I’m certain the Ministry wouldn’t be so inclined to employ so many of your ilk if your son couldn’t even pass this reform school." "You can’t kick Draco out!" Ron protested. "He doesn’t have anywhere to go!" "He should have thought of that before breaking the rules." Mary said grimly. "Besides, from his reaction during our discussion, he didn’t seem to feel remorse for this incident at all. I’m quite certain you were nothing but an experiment for him." Arthur rubbed Ron’s back reassuringly. Ron paled, unbelieving. "He didn’t say that." "He as good as said it." She stood and began to pace. "I’m willing to let you continue on to graduation. However, you’re going to have to break all of your ties with your family and friends. No communication. You will go to therapy session and then back to the bunks. You will not eat with the other students. You will not attend any other special outings. You will also perform your Final Test with both Cho and Anna." "Ron, I know you can do this." Molly said encouragingly. "We need you to be able to do this." Ron looked at his mother, then at his father, who had taken off his short wizard’s cap and begun rubbing his head nervously. "I’m afraid, if you can’t graduate here…" Arthur faltered and looked at Molly, as if they had discussed this already, and this was his part to play, which he’d forgotten. Molly sighed heavily in irritation at Arthur and altered her face from compassion to the strict disciplinarian that Ron was so accustomed to. "If you can’t graduate, you aren’t going to be able to return home. We can’t allow that sort of thing to be tolerated in our house. I’m sorry, Ron. We love you. But we can’t let you live like that with our consent." "I understand, Mum." Ron heard himself say. He felt numb as he nodded along under his father’s approving eye. Molly looked a bit relieved, but managed to keep that stern eye on him regardless. Mary handed him his balled up clothing and a set of greys. He stumbled lifelessly into the other room to put on the clothing. His arms pulled on the stiff fabric, holding no strength of their own. He walked back out, his head cowed, and he felt himself being guided by his father’s hand outside. "Fuck you!" Draco’s voice shrilled through the air, stringent and certain. Lucius Malfoy had been turned, ready to leave campus in his ornate carriage. He turned to Draco and looked on him with the contempt he had formerly reserved for Mudbloods and Werewolves. "Set one foot on my estate, child, and I will see that you lose it." Draco turned around, his face was in a full pout and it looked like he had been sobbing for quite awhile. Lucius got into his carriage, not one look back for his only child. Ron looked on the scene stunned. Draco caught his eye and looked up with a little spark of hope. "Ron!" He said and stepped forward. Mary darted over and stepped in front of him. He ignored her like a house elf and stood on his toes, speaking over her shoulder. "Come with me. Come with me, Ron!" "Take your things and go, Draco. You’ve made your choice." Mary demanded. Ron bit his lip as he met Draco’s desperate eyes. His father’s hand on his shoulder was almost as palpable as his mother’s gaze on the back of his neck. He looked at the ground. "Ron! Look at me!" Draco shouted. Paul came up and taking him by the shoulders, began to lead him away. "It’s time to go, kiddo." "Ron! Answer me! Come on!" "Draco, I can’t!" Ron cried after him, his voice breaking pitifully. He breathed shakily trying to keep himself from saying something he’d regret. "I… can’t." Draco stopped fighting Paul’s strong arms for a moment, then pushed away from him. "Get the fuck off me." He grabbed his suitcase, which the House Elves had refilled with all of his things and dragged it with him. He half turned, struggling with the suitcase. "You deserve better than this, Ron!" He yelled as loudly as he could. "You don’t believe it! But you do!" Ron didn’t look up as his parents led him back to his bunk. *** "You whore!" Anna’s palms slammed into Michelle. The small girl reeled and caught the side of a table to keep her from falling over. "Shut up! He got me in trouble! Why shouldn’t I return the favor?" "What are you two crazy bints talking about?" Steven asked, looking over at the girls from his table. "I just heard Paul and Mary talking, and apparently this little wankerette tipped them off that Ron and Draco would be messing around last night." "Oh, Michelle, that was really harsh." Cho said with disappointment. "Like I said. He got me and Rita busted. I was just showing him how it felt!" "But you and Rita didn’t love each other." "Oh, like he cared about Ron at all! And it doesn’t matter. He got us caught. My sis has been sending me letters from Rita and her parents threw her out on the street because of him!" "He got thrown out on the street, you stupid bitch!" Anna smacked her in the back of the head. "And Ron’s whole family got screwed because of this mess. And what Draco did to you was an accident!" Eli, who was sitting next to Rob, talking to her and trying to ignore their conversation suddenly stood up, walked over to the table, and grabbed Anna’s wrist. "Leggo." She struggled in his grasp. "Now listen to me. We aren’t going to get anywhere by turning on each other. That’s obvious. What we need to do now is decide, do we want to finish this. And if so, stick together and do it. It’s too hard to do alone." Eli informed them flatly. "Draco shouldn’t have been out there to catch Michelle and Rita, but Michelle and Rita shouldn’t have been out there in the first place. No, Michelle shouldn’t have told Mary about Ron and Draco, but they knew the risks and should have been more careful." "Enough is enough." Rob continued quietly. "We all know that two rights don’t make a wrong. If everyone is quite through hurting themselves, we should just try to survive this thing and get on with our lives." "He did care about Ron." Steven said, knitting his brows. "I know he did, and so does Eli. And so did Andreas. He cared before he came here and was fighting it the whole way. I’m not going to cause a fuss. But you should know you helped break up something special. It wasn’t just a quick fuck." Steven got up and left the group, heading back to the bunk where he knew Ron would be picking at his food and studying for or completing yet another psychological test that was supposed to make him understand how messed up he was. "Hey." Ron was lying face down, half falling off of his bed, starring at the wall. "’ey, Steve." His voice was devoid of any inflection. He sounded hollow. "You okay?" "No." Steven sat on his bed and looked around the room. With Andreas and Draco gone, the bunkroom seemed so empty. So lonely. He patted Ron’s mop of hair gently. "Two weeks, buddy. Two weeks." "Too long." Ron muttered. "Too alone." "I know." *** Draco took a deep breath and sighed heavily. It was getting pretty late. He’d been walking all day in the clothing he’d worn the first day at True Directions, not even having the time to bathe before he was set off the campus. So he was covered in road dust, sweat, and sticky semen that had dried all over his legs, backside and stomach. He felt absolutely exhausted, ready to drop, and perhaps ready to just walk out in front of the next car that came by, took a look at him and kept going. He could see why so many Death Eaters hated Muggles. Not to mention the one that had picked him up and thrown him right back on the road after asking what that smell was. He built up some courage and knocked on Snape’s door. A house elf, oddly dressed in a mini pair of overalls poked its head out the door. "Who be you." It asked authoritatively. "I’m Draco Malfoy." He answered. The house elf cocked its head thinking for a moment. "You be from True Directions!" It cried, and slammed the door. Draco knocked on the door again, determined that this little midget wasn’t going to keep him from having a roof over his head. "Not anymore!" He yelled. His voice splintered all over the place. It was scratchy and dry from no food or water on the hot summer day. He waited a moment and then slumped against the door. Suddenly it opened and he fell inside. Looking up, he saw Snape’s wry face looking down on him. The large man grabbed Draco under his arms. "Come on." Excited, but mostly relieved, Draco struggled up and started to drag his suitcase inside. Snape leaned over to the house elf and spoke firmly, but not condescendingly. "Prepare another bed, Maca." The house elf skittered off. Snape turned back to Draco, took the handle of his suitcase from him, and pulling it inside, slammed the door shut with the other hand. "Remi," Snape called into the other room. "We’ve another visitor." Remus padded into the room, comfortable and barefoot wearing a worn pair of jeans, a tight knit top, and a flannel shirt, as he dried a supper dish with a towel. "Oh?" "Yes." Remus looked up and blinked with surprise. He opened his mouth a bit to say something and looked over to Severus questioningly. "I’m assuming you’d like to stay the night." Severus said curtly to Draco, who nodded, a bit abashedly. Remus smiled at him suddenly and set the dish down on the coffee table. "Are you hungry? Of course you are. Would you like food first, or a bath?" Draco stood dumbfounded for a moment. "Oh ye gods, could I please have a shower?" Remus chuckled. "All the better. It’ll give me time to cook something." "He means it’ll give me time to cook something." Severus corrected him acerbically, raising a brow. Though he was speaking to Draco, he was looked directly at Remus. "As it is impolite to poison guests." "I would never!" Remus replied with mock indignance. Severus swatted at his arm, then turned to Draco. "You can use the washroom down that hall right there." He told him, pointing. "When you’re done, Maca can show you where you’ll be sleeping, and the dining room is right over there. If you get lost, just knock on the walls. Maca’s used to it by now." Draco eagerly headed into Snape’s washroom, which was surprisingly spacious. He hadn’t known that teachers had such well-furnished houses, but Draco supposed that it had something to do with the long line of Snapes, and the infrequency of Potions Masters. Snape probably had a good corner on the market in their area. They tended not to live around one another if they could help it. He locked the door behind him and peeled out of his clothing, thinking that he might never wear those salmon pants again, even if he could get them clean. Then he sat wearily on the edge of the bathtub, the porcelain cold against his backside. "Dammit, Ron, what am I supposed to do without you?" He whispered. He stared at his feet, before so well manicured and tender, now hardened from working outside everyday and walking so far. "I suppose I can find a way to live on my own. I can do a lot more than I thought… But I don’t want to if you’re not here… why couldn’t you see that?" He sighed heavily and climbed into the shower. The hot water sprayed down on his dusty skin, a cleansing force washing away all the shame of the previous day’s events. Draco’s head throbbed as he mechanically washed himself. He was tired and didn’t want to think anymore. He stopped the shower, jumped out, then realized he had nothing to change into. "Dammit." Draco sighed again and took a blue towel off of the bar beside the bathtub and wrapped it around his chest and waist as tight as he could. Peeking out the door into the hallway to make sure no one was looking, he knocked on the wall. Nothing happened. Draco cringed and snuck down the hallway, poking his head into each room, hoping to see the house elf or his suitcase. At the end of the hallway, a double doorway was closed. He eased up to it and poked his head inside the large room. His eyes widened. "Hullo." Harry Potter blinked back at him from a mattress on the floor where he had a textbook cracked open. Draco blushed and hung his head. "Is my suitcase in here? I don’t have any clothes to change into." Harry looked a bit uncertain, but put aside his book and walked across the room. "Yeah, it’s here." "Thank you." Draco darted across the room and flipped it open. He began digging through for something to wear. "Can I ask you a question?" Harry asked. He’d sat down on the mattress facing the wall. "I suppose." "Why are you wearing that towel around your chest?" Draco clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Because I’m naked." "Yeah, but, you’re a guy, so you don’t need to worry about your bare chest-" "Dammit!" Draco jerked a pair of silk pajamas out of the suitcase and slammed it shut. Harry had turned his head and was starring at him oddly. A large purplish bruise was smeared indelicately beneath his right eye. Draco walked around behind the window curtain and began to shimmy into his clothing. When he finished he came out and sat in frustration on the suitcase. "Did I do something wrong?" Harry asked finally. Draco shook his head and leaned his chin onto his hands. "No. I do everything wrong. I just can’t be normal." Harry swung his legs around and looked at Draco’s back for a long time. He was wearing one of the nicest pairs of pajamas he’d ever seen, a shimmery lime green. "What’s normal?" Harry asked finally. Draco turned around and scowled at him. "Normal. Pureblood. Manly. Straight. That’s normal!" Harry grimaced a little. "Yeah… but…" "What?" Draco demanded. Harry raised a brow and looked at him steadily. "I dunno." Harry responded automatically. Draco shook his head and laughed. "What?" " ‘I dunno.’ " Draco grinned, still shaking his head. "Ron said you always say that. It’s true." He took a deep breath and straightened his face. "You can say what you want. I’m a fallen angel now. I don’t have anyone to back me up anymore, and I’m a lousy fighter. Say what you want." "Er… well. I’m straight. But nobody thinks I’m normal. Most of Ron’s brothers are straight and I wouldn’t call any of them normal either. Sirius is nowhere near normal. I don’t think normal really exists." Harry frowned a little thinking about it. "There are just people who want everything to be the same so they can understand it easier." "Maybe…" Draco said softly. The door cracked open, and Remus’ salt and pepper hair crowned through the door. He smiled at the boys gently. "We’ve got dinner ready. Are you still hungry?" Draco looked over at him uncertainly. "Yes. Thank you." He stood up and slowly followed Remus into the hallway, realizing they were both barefoot, and this was the first time he had ever walked around this way in another person’s house. Harry had followed them, and stepped up to walk with Remus. "How’s your head?" Remus asked, touching Harry’s chin slightly so that the boy would raise his face up. "Better." He replied softly, his expression still flat. Draco regarded the exchange and realized how rare it was for him to see Harry smile, even when he was with his friends. In the dining room, Severus was setting out plates on the table. "Maca flooed back to the manor to get another bed." He said plainly, setting a few dishes on the table. "Sorry things are so late… Nice pajamas, Draco." "I’m sorry, Professor. It was the first thing I grabbed-" Severus raised his hand and shook his head. "I’m teasing you, boy. Sit down and eat." Remus sat down next to Severus and squeezed his hand gently before taking a dish and spooning it first onto Severus’ plate, and then onto his. He passed it over to Harry. "So Draco. Do you have any plans about what you want to do now?" Severus asked flatly. Remus looked up and spoke gently. "I think it’s maybe too soon to be thinking about that, don’t you?" "I’m just asking a question, Remus." "Well, I’m only thinking that, perhaps, Draco needs some time to put these events behind him before he tries to move on, Severus." "I don’t see how it would hurt for him to start thinking about how things are going to go once they start back at school. It isn’t going to be easy." Severus replied sharply. "There’s really no need to be angry." Remus said studying the saltshaker. "I’m not angry." Severus snapped angrily. Harry and Draco’s eyes darted back and forth between the two. "Can’t I have an opinion?" "What happened to you?" Harry interrupted, looking at Draco. "What happened to you?" Draco returned. The two men looked at the boys then looked at each other rather sheepishly. Harry eyed his dinner. "I ran away again." "I got kicked out for fucking." Harry’s eyebrows screwed together in disbelief. "Well, that’ll do it." Severus muttered, with some amusement. Remus covered his mouth to keep from smiling. "How in the world did you manage to graduate from that place?" Draco asked bluntly. "I’m not that hopeless, am I?" Severus returned dryly. "No. They are." "Knowing that my father would kill me if I didn’t graduate helped." "That Cum woman is one of the scariest people I’ve ever seen." Harry said. "Cummings." Remus corrected softly. "And… people can be very scary when they believe in something that much." Severus reached over and mussed with the back of Remus’ hair as he ate his meal straight faced. The boys looked at each other again, exchanging uncertainty and a bit of kinship before returning to the table’s silence. When they were nearly finished, Maca danced back in and ran up to Severus. "Got some of the elves back at the manor to help. Set up their bedroom very quick." "Good job, Maca." Severus told him. Maca skittered off quickly. "I’ve never heard of a house elf with a name like that." Draco said. He set down his fork and sighed. He’d probably eaten too fast. It had been so long since he’d had any food. "When I was I child I got tired of calling them those silly names, so I gave them the choice of what name they wanted to be called." Severus smirked evilly. "They got hold of my books on botany and all named themselves after plants." "I didn’t know house elves could read." "Mine can because they kept begging to organize my books." "Our house elves just go crazy and beat themselves." Draco said shaking his head. "I think they get it from mimicking us." "I do hope that’s a dig on your father." "More on myself. But it works for mum and father too." Seeing that the boys had finished, Remus stood up and started clearing the table. "I think you both ought to try to get some rest. It’s been a day, hasn’t it?" "Are you going to give us lights out?" Draco asked. Remus paused in confusion. "No." He looked over at Severus. "Should I?" Severus waved his hand and helped him clear the table. "Forget it." Remus creased his brows, and Severus set the plates in the sink, then circled his arms around his waist, pulling Remus up against him. He leaned his forehead against Remus’ and with a wide grin said, "Go to bed, kids. We’ve got adult things to discuss." Remus chuckled. Draco and Harry took to the hallway and headed toward their room. "Are they the cutest couple you’ve ever seen or what?" Harry whispered. Draco nodded. "Though I’ve not had the chance to see many couples that weren’t completely dysfunctional." "I dunno." Harry went into the room. He surveyed the bed, which had somehow transformed from a mattress on the floor to a bunk bed. "They did do a good job." Nodding, he ran his fingers over the marble bed frame. "Er… I mean, my aunt and uncle are neurotic and horrible, but they work well together." "Nice role models." Draco leaned back on the futon bottom of the bunk bed. "My mum is a narcissistic freeloader and my father is the ego king. Most of the time he spent with me involved him trying to make me a miniature version of himself." "I guess he didn’t try hard enough." Draco laughed bitterly. Harry leaned back with him and looked over uncertainly. "He was supposed to come with me." Draco said after a moment. He wasn’t sure how Harry would deal with him fucking his best friend. He wasn’t even sure how a best friend should react. "Who?" Draco looked into Harry’s bright green eyes. "Ron. He was supposed to leave with me." For a moment confusion rule Harry’s features, then slowly registered understanding. "Ohhhhh. You’re the one he was so on about in his letters!" "You’re not mad?" "Er…" Harry frowned a bit. "Maybe. No, not really. Ron’s letters seemed happier, and I want him to be happy. He’s been really messed up the past year, and I don’t have a clue how to fix it." "I don’t see how bowing down to Mary’s demented whims is going to help." Draco pouted and curled his knees up under his chin. He groaned miserably. "Why didn’t he come with me?" "Maybe he’s scared?" "I think it’s his family. I don’t care if my parents give up on me. But I guess he has a connection to his." "Wonder what that’s like." The two boys looked at each other again. Draco smirked. "No wonder you almost got into Slytherin." Harry blew some hair away from his glasses. "Hey…" "What?" Harry narrowed his eyes at Draco. "Did you have sex with Ron?" *** "Wouldn’t that work better with two guys?" Rob asked. Eli grinned over at her while Mary glared. "Roberta, honestly." She shrugged. "I mean, for hookup purposes." "That’s enough." Mary clipped. Once again inside the Final Test room, the students all stood along watching as Ron lay on the bed for the second time. Now with both Anna and Cho waiting on the simulation. All three were dressed in skintight spandex and blushing uncomfortably. Ron had the questionable luck of going first, as they acted out what was supposed to be a male fantasy. Actually he would have preferred the matter if Cho and Anna would just pair up and leave him out of it. "Hey, if Rob can get two guys at the same time, wouldn’t you encourage that?" Eli laughed. "Women don’t have sexual appetites. They put up with sex so they can get pregnant." Anna rolled over on top of Ron’s back and started to hump him. "Anna Mores what are you doing?!" "Making a baby." "Not on me, you’re not." Ron protested, rising up on his knees. Anna fell off onto the bed, and Ron straddled her legs and slammed his hands down on her wrists. "Ooga chaka!" "That’s not fair!" Anna protested with a sarcastic edge. "Make Ron have the baby, Miss Cummings! I want to have a pretty figure like in the mail catalogs." "It doesn’t work like that. But you’ve got the right idea." She sighed. "Hurry up, Ron. Unload and pull out." Cho lay where Ron had left her, her dark silken hair spread over the bright new bedspread like an undisturbed pool. Her eyes were vacant, and she only barely felt the mattress shaking underneath her. "Okay, good job. Next." Ron stepped off the bed, feeling his skin crawl. He leaned over and grabbed Cho’s soft hands and pulled her up. She hugged her arms and leaned up against the wall, waiting for the others to enact their own little conjugal scenes. Anna leaned over and pinched her arm. Anna smiled as Rob and Eli jumped onto the bed with gusto. "Man on top, Roberta." Mary instructed. "You’re not here for a good time." "Clearly." Anna muttered, petting Cho’s hair reassuringly. *** The hot summer air almost choked them as they sat waiting patiently, sitting on a log outside of Mary’s office. Ron studied his feet, trying to figure out what exactly about the experience in the bed had bothered him. He pressed his lips together, grimaced and started to sing softly. "I know, you love the song but not the singer," he sang, as Steven lifted his head and looked at him with an expression loving sympathy. "I know, you've got me wrapped around your finger. I know, you want the sin without the sinner, I know, I know..." "You should get some voice lessons, Ron." Michelle told him. Anna elbowed her hard in the ribs. "Don’t be such a cunt." "Just so happens I am a cunt. And I mean it." Michelle turned back to Ron. "You really have a nice voice. With a little training you could probably cut a record." Ron shrugged listlessly. "I’ll probably be going into the Ministry with the rest of my family." Steven raised a brow worriedly. "I th-… do you really want to do that?" "Dunno." Ron looked down at his shoes again. "You okay, Cho?" She said on the edge of the log trying to make her willowy self as small as possible. "I’ll live." All seven heads turned as Mary began to approach, walking stiffly as ever with her clipboard. She eyed them severely as they looked up at her expectantly. "I have to say, I’m proud of this group. It’s been a long, hard road." She paused and looked over their blank faces. Then nodded with approval. "But those of you that have made it this far have made a deep investment in your future. There’s nothing to be gained from a degenerate life of homosexuality." She began to pace back and forth, still watching them oddly as if gauging their reactions. "Overall, you’ve done well. Almost all of you." She turned to them abruptly and looked over to the left. Ron’s heart sped up. Was she looking at him? Was his life as he knew it over? "I’m sorry. Roberta, you’ve failed. Please leave. The rest of you have passed. Congratulations. You’re heterosexuals." Rob got up and grabbed Eli’s hand. The boy’s face crinkled at the eyes and around his mouth in a wide wide smile that seemed to take over his whole face. Peering over to see what she was doing, Ron realized she had a pen in her hand and was writing on Eli’s palm. "Call me." She ordered. Eli laughed. "Try to stop me." "You should go now, Roberta. They should rest up for graduation preparations." Rob turned to her and crossed her arms confrontationally. "You know something, you stupid bitch? I’m not a lesbian. I never was. Just because I’m not what you want me to be doesn’t make me what you say I am. And my name is Rob, not Roberta. You don’t get to name me. So fuck you, and fuck your bloody school. I hope it burns to the ground." Mary stood with her mouth open as Rob stalked away. The remaining six sat dumbfounded on the log waiting further instructions. Eli smiled giddily. Ron was the first to stand up, and he practically ran back to the bunk. "I know, the past will catch you up as you run faster," Ron sang to himself as he rapidly searched through his things. Something had just struck his brain. "I know, the last in line is always called a bastard, "Dammit, I don’t know what I’m looking for." He sat wearily at the foot of his bed, his fingers still picking through his suitcase. They’d all prepared them prior to the announcement, so they couldn’t cause too much trouble before they left. "I know, you cut me loose from contradiction," He systematically began to throw out each piece of clothing he had in the suitcase. "I know, I'm all wrapped up in sweet attrition," Disregarded a pair of shoes. "I know, It's asking for your benediction," Felt his hands brush against a piece of paper and pulled it out of the mess of notes he’d been taking for his studies. A torn, half piece of parchment. I’m sorry that I took this. I mean I didn’t mean to take it, but I’m sorry that I kept it from you, because I know you must be lonely without your friend here. I’ve never had friends before, so I can’t understand. I don’t have much time. I just want to tell you, I love you Ron. I LOVE YOU. It wasn’t just pillow talk, Gingersnap. No matter what they try to tell you, that much is for bloody sure. And I’ll never stop loving you, no matter what you do. Don’t forget that. "Oh…" He flipped it around to the other side, which had Harry’s handwriting on it. He wrinkled his brow and wondered where Draco had gotten it. He smiled for the first time in weeks. "Sweetcheeks." Steven and Eli walked in laughing, and silenced when they saw Ron. "You alright?" Steven sat in the floor with him, cross-legged. Eli did the same, and pulled his knees up to his chest. "Dunno." He looked at him seriously. "I think I could be, but I dunno." "Depends on how much you want it." Eli said, almost cheerfully, waving his hand with the written number on is in front of them. "Rob’s got terrible handwriting, you know? Who finds a girlfriend at gay camp?" Steven complained. "Lesbians I’d guess." Ron sighed, looking over the letter again. It wasn’t just pillow talk, Gingersnap. "I can handle being a lesbian, if I get to be with Rob. She’s bloody amazing. Quiet. Able to fix a car much better than me, but amazing." "Best of luck." Ron said softly. Steven smiled at him, fixing that concerned expression and leaning over to envelop him in a hug. Eli looked on, blink in surprise as Steven ruffled Ron’s hair affectionately. "I know whatever choices you make, Ron, they’ll be the right ones for you. So don’t worry so much. Nobody’s going to stop loving you." He sat back and kissed Ron on his left temple. "Don’t forget that." "I’ll try." Ron smiled and squeezed Steven’s hand. "How'd you get to be so strong?" "Survival of the fittest." He replied, half smiling at his own grim joke. "Yeah." Eli punched his arm. "Don’t look so glum. "I just wish…" Ron sighed. "That I didn’t have to choose. But I guess… since I don’t have a choice about that… this is so pathetic. They don’t deserve it. They’ve ignored me my whole life, and never even given me the chance to be a real person, not just another Weasley knockoff! This is so wrong." He sighed again and set the letter up against his lips. It smelled like Draco. He must have put some of his hair gel or cologne on it. "Two people trying to do what is so right get knocked down, and the people who need to change the most get to stay the same. It’s so wrong." "I know." Steven ran his finger tips up and down Ron’s arm comfortingly. "Since I don’t have a choice." He said again. "It isn’t for them anyway. I might as well give her some choices." Ron set the scrap of parchment carefully between the pages of his potions book and lay down wearily on his bed, hearing Steven and Eli speak softly around him. Long after they had stopped talking and turned out the lights, he lay completely still, his mind continuing the argument through the night. |